MAKING THE FIRST MOVE - a naked soul : JABIR FF - COMPLETED - Page 3

Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by shruzzy


A very good effort i loved the way kept the fun element along with the emotions thats good!!! do continue.....

thanks dear. soon i'll be posting jabir flashbacks.... romance and all. 

keep reading and reviewing.

also if you don't like anything you can point it out

Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by foxi


Second part was soo funny! Loved ammas sarcasm.

hahah, he waited ten minutes after drinking the juice- then he ran. Too good :)

Continue soon, really enjoying this.

thankxxx dear.........soon i'll be posting jabir sequence. i hope to get a long comment then šŸ„±

also you can criticize if you don't like anything . 

thank yo again

Posted: 4 years ago

                          OH  S-H-I-T !!    -     THE PUNCHLINE 


Kabir has been driving since 15 minutes, eyes never leaving the road. He hasn't spoken a word since they get into the car.

But he was distrait, finding it difficult to concentrate on road ā€“ reason ā€“ her - beside him - a persistent questioning glare.

kabir hasn't spared her a look since he dragged her and almost shoved her into the car.

 He was ashamed of his action. That was very inappropriate  -  he felt as if he had abused her. 

His rough and strong hands would feel abrasive against her smooth, soft and silky skin.

He made a mental note to apologize later. 53rd entry to the list.

But only after he will get out this muddle.

 

 

FLASHBACK :

 


ā€œKa-beeerrā€¦ā€¦ā€¦what are yo-ā€œ

Kabir grabbed her wrist and walked up to amma. He bowed down and touched her feet.

He apologized in slow manner ā€“

ā€œ Amma ! I am sorry for barging in ā€“ AGAIN !ā€

Suhasini and kabir exchanged a mutual smile. While Pooja looked surprised exposed  to their equation.

ā€œWe are leaving. Sorry if my wife has disturbed your sleep.ā€

With a final sweet smile. He turned on his heels and stride towards his car outside,literally dragging a screaming Pooja behind him.

 

He remembered her truculent and tenacious voice in the background. She relentlessly kept wrestling his grip.

 

ā€œ What theā€¦.

Kabeeeerrrā€¦..

Are you deaf ! I was talking to herā€¦ā€¦ā€¦.

What is wrong with you kabeeerrrrā€¦ā€¦ā€¦.

Aaaaaooou----chā€¦ā€¦ā€¦.leave me kabeerā€¦.

Fine ! at least slow down a littleā€¦ā€¦

Kabeer I am wearing heelsā€¦ā€¦

If I tripā€¦..

I am taking you with meā€¦ā€¦.

Kabeeeerrrrā€¦ā€¦.kabir..kabirā€¦.kabir-kabir-kabirā€¦ā€¦..god! this manā€¦

Kabir you leave my hand now orā€¦ā€¦ā€

 

 

Kabir opened the car gate and turned to her. She came crashing into him with full force.

 

The moment her body came in contact with him, his breath hitched. His senses started swinging. Her smell make him inebriated.

He thanked the INTERTIA for existing. But that's  not all.

 

He had to take the support of the car to refrain from falling onto ground.

He immediately regret his decision.

It would have been better if his head had hit the ground. He would rather be dead thanthis spot.

 

Poojaā€™s body pressed hard against his own. He could feel every part of her.

Her legs.

Her thighs.

Her hands.

Her stomach.

Her breasts.

Her nose.

Her hair.

HER LIPS.

Her Wet lips rubbing against his sensitive skin.

But he needs to control himself.

His hands were pleading to touch her, hold her back. But he refused to give permission.

 

ā€œ OH SHIT !CONTROL KABIR MITTAL CONTROL ! YOU ARE RAISED BETTER THAN THIS. YOU CANā€™T LET YOURSELF SPECKLE YOUR UPBRINGING !ā€

 

He sternly believed that in comparison to controlling himself  -  Death would be more easy.

Her most innocent touch en kindles his hormones, induces irresistible urge.

But now ā€“the misery is on another level.

All of her was touching all of his.

He felt himself going hard against her. ā€œoh god ! can she feel me ?! Noooooo !ā€

Kabir was having revolting thoughts

His face turned pink. He felt ashamed of his yearnings.

He owe a huge one to those ā€“ who invented clothing ā€“ otherwise it would have  been impossible to hide his appetite from her.  

 

 

Incognizant of kabirā€™s plight. Pooja had her own struggles.

 

Pooja hid her face into the crook of his neck and hold onto his shirt dreading the fall.

Two buttons of his shirt came off and her nails dig into chest.

 

He didn't feel it.

 

BUT..........

 

He felt her lips touching ā€“ nibbling - his Adamā€™s apple.

A current went through his whole body. He went stock-still - unable to move.

Unable to breathe.

He remained in that position ā€“ arched body and Pooja over him.

 

 

After a moment, Pooja hold herself and took carā€™s support trying to stand on her heels properly. She looked at kabir.

 

He was staring at her stunned. He wasnā€™t blinking but he was not seeing her either.

 His eyes were on her but he was in a different world.

 

 

Pooja was ignorant of her effects.  She shook him by shoulder ā€“

 

 ā€œ kabir ! are you alright !ā€

 

No reaction!

 

ā€œsorry you were dragging me so I couldnā€™t hold myself.ā€

 

Poojaā€™s hand crawled to kabirā€™s waist and snaked behind him, searching.

 

 She looked at him ā€“

 

 ā€œDoes it hurt ! look Iā€™m so sor-ā€œ

 

ā€œOH SHIT !ā€

 

Pooja froze.

She experienced her blood boiling. She felt this unstoppable urge to punch him in the nose.

But it was inane to puch somebody just because they keep repeating their ā€œ O H   S H I T ā€ .

If she disapprove of something - it's her problem. She is no one to decide what others should say.

It was unreasonable so Pooja didn't punch. she did what she did the best.

Pretending. Feigning ignorance to the little accident as if it never happened. She tried to compose herself.

 

Meanwhile ,kabir was also unenlightened of the facts regarding poojaā€™s mental processing -

 

He maneuvered himself away from her without touching her. 

He faced away from her. He pulled his hair in frustration and shook his head. He decided to stop thinking and completing the task in hand.

Keep yourself busy and nothing goes wrong. He turned to her again. Hurriedly he informed her :

 

ā€œ sorry about that ! Iā€™ll be careful next time ! ā€¦.. Now ! get inā€   -

 

 

Pooja was about to retort when kabir hold her shoulder firmly with one hand and with another he grabbed her waist and shoved her inside the car forcefully.

Then He slammed the door.

And without wasting any moment, he get inside and pulled off the car.

 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________


PRECAP : radio fight and songs : kundi mat khatkao raja .......!!! šŸ˜ˆšŸ˜³šŸ˜›


________________________________________________________________________________________________________

hello everyone ! 

now this one is for everyone who keep their patience and bear with me.

i had this idea but i cannot directly come to such a scene.

let's just admit we all want to see only jabir scenes.

so here's a little piece to try something sizzling - exploring their chemistry.

NOW NOW NOW - i leave it to you guys to tell me how do you like it. 

what are your thoughts and would you like to read one more sequence like this.

let me know.

do comment even if you don't like it.

i'll waiting !

with love ! ā¤ļøšŸ¤—

Edited by Tanu221 - 4 years ago
Posted: 4 years ago

I loved it!!! Continue writing!!!!

Posted: 4 years ago

This is really really amazing..i read the chapters in a go yesterday night before bed, and i wanted to appreciate you in detail,  but i was so sleepy to do so, so thought of doing it next day..and here i am..You are too good at writing dialogues for the character yar..Kabirs dialogues are so funny in a very adorable way and i am enjoying his banter thoroughly.. i am having a good laugh at the helpless, cute kabir  but at the same time feeling butterflies in the stomach as well...plzz update the next chapters soonish..cant wait to read further.

A suggestion..i think you should proof read the chapters after completing each part because 'spaces' missing in between words at many places.. it would be better if you could correct it by editing the posts.

Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by Icey_dreams


I loved it!!! Continue writing!!!!

 

thanks dear.... i ll definately post one more by tomorrow. thanks again.

Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by Ardhanarishwara


This is really really amazing..i read the chapters in a go yesterday night before bed, and i wanted to appreciate you in detail,  but i was so sleepy to do so, so thought of doing it next day..and here i am..You are too good at writing dialogues for the character yar..Kabirs dialogues are so funny in a very adorable way and i am enjoying his banter thoroughly.. i am having a good laugh at the helpless, cute kabir  but at the same time feeling butterflies in the stomach as well...plzz update the next chapters soonish..cant wait to read further.

A suggestion..i think you should proof read the chapters after completing each part because 'spaces' missing in between words at many places.. it would be better if you could correct it by editing the posts.

oh thank you so much !! thank you very very much. for making time for my work as well as for commenting.

you know appreciation is the only reward i seek. 

and special thanx for your suggestion.

i have also noticed that so tried to fix it in later chapter. if you have noticed last two chaps have less issues. but i will be more careful - that's for sure.

thankss again. will be waiting for your detailed analysis on next chapter as well.

regards and love.

Posted: 4 years ago

Thank you for the pm

Enjoyed readimg this story. Sometimes people around you are more observant of what is going between to people

Looking to read more

Posted: 4 years ago

thanks dear...

keep reading. i have one more update

Posted: 4 years ago

done šŸ‘šŸ¼

between thank you so much for suggesting  watpadd. 

i will also post my other work there. 

thanks again for encouraging me to post it on watpadd.

i owe you this one.šŸ˜Š



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