in defense of waseem

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mango

@mango.falooda

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

waseem is a flawed father but not a terrible one. in other words, he is just normal! there is no such thing as perfect parent. and at one point, all children realize that they will have different views, there will be conflicts but the relationship can and does grow. it is all part of becoming an adult. a parent-child relationship is fluid and dynamic. and just as children have a right to their opinion and thoughts, so do parents! so there is bound to be conflict.

so here's why waseem is flawed but not terrible:

1. he hated yash but zoya was still free to come to their house to eat. he did not ban her or cut off contact no matter how annoyed he was.

2. he hated yash but when yash asked for a loan to buy a house in mumbai, waseem gave the money. why? all for zoya because she hated living in the city. and waseem smart enough to protect zoya by insisting that the deed be done in her name. this ensured that zoya had a place to stay in mumbai and no one can kick her out.

3. he was frustrated with zoya's insistence to stay back in mumbai but he didn't drag her or kidnap her back to musoorie. he let her make her own decision and face the consequences -- he treated her as an adult just like how he accepted her marriage to yash. he hated it and had choice words to say but ultimately it was her call.

4. no matter the issues, when zoya was in trouble in mumbai and arrested, he and roshana flew down immediately. he didn't trust hoodas from the get go but he was willing to put it aside only for zoya because he felt papa hooda's was zoya's best bet to get out of jail. so he put his pride and papa danger antenna aside just for her

5. he and roshana have stayed in mumbai solely for zoya's comfort. she wanted to re-start zosh and where did that money come from? waseem. sure aditya gave her confidence but without money, how many women struggle to rebuild their lives? waseem provided that silent monetary support till she landed on her feet.

6. he hates aditya but he has never banned zoya from meeting him. even when his papa antenna was zinging that aditya has more than friendly feelings for zoya, he didn't try to sabotage him or ban him from working.

7. his reason for rejecting aditya is not because he hates aditya's character, his family or that aditya is from a different community. instead, he doesn't want zoya to be reminded or tied to the past and wants zoya to have a fresh start -- thats the heart of a father. and thats why aditya also responded so kindly when he said that despite their super strange beginning, that experience brought them together as they struggled through the pain and learned to trust, live and laugh again.

why he is flawed father/person:

1. he thinks he knows zoya better than herself. and he can be quite cruel in his words.

2. yes, he is insulting aditya repeatedly in a technique to try and get this fellow out of their lives.

3. he is oblivious to noor at times as his focus is so much on zoya...

4. he is stubborn and sarcastic -- it amuses me because he is many ways just like aditya which is why he hates aditya so much! hahahhaha.. it also explains the push-pull that zoya feels towards aditya because he is so much like her father in many ways...

so as viewers, we know that zoya is in love with aditya but she has yet to admit it to herself. so why blame waseem when zoya willingly said yes to arshad? ofcourse he is a flawed parent but there's no such thing as perfect parent because as humans, we all have a few drawbacks, we all have less than perfect behaviours and words, we all have times where we act like idiots.

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Dragonfly88

@Dragonfly88

Rocker

+ 7

Posted: 7 years ago

Waseem up unit yesterday was not a terrible parent.

Yes he wants good for his daughter but which father doesn't notice that his daughter is half the time lost or in tears. How come roshna is the only one who is able to see that zoya is fake smiling for everyone? Waseem knows very well Zoya is not happy but he is willingly ready to go ahead with the wedding because he feels she will eventually fall in love with arshad when she lives in the same house. Zoya did say yes to arshad on her own but he cornered her from everywhere to say yes. Emotionally blackmailing parents are the worst of kind. She broke her rishta with Arshad publicly yet her father called him home the very same day to convince her. Wouldn't you think twice before forcing your daughter if she is saying no that many times.

Lastly yesterday he wasn't a bad father, he was a degraded human being. I know for a fact if my father hated my boyfriend he would never go down to the level that waseem did. On top of that smile when he sees me in pain watching my guy on the floor. So yeah waseem is a flawed parent but he is not a nice person in general. He is quite dark inside to be inflicting pain on others intentionally.

Edited by Dragonfly88 - 7 years ago

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mango

@mango.falooda

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: Dragonfly88
Waseem up unit yesterday was not a terrible parent.

Yes he wants good for his daughter but which father doesn't notice that his daughter is half the time lost or in tears. How come roshna is the only one who is able to see that zoya is fake smiling for everyone? Waseem knows very well Zoya is not happy but he is willingly ready to go ahead with the wedding because he feels she will eventually fall in love with arshad when she lives in the same house. Zoya did say yes to arshad on her own but he cornered her from everywhere to say yes. Emotionally blackmailing parents are the worst of kind. She broke her rishta with Arshad publicly yet her father called him home the very same day to convince her. Wouldn't you think twice before forcing your daughter if she is saying no that many times.

Lastly yesterday he wasn't a bad father, he was a degraded human being. I know for a fact if my father hated my boyfriend he would never go down to the level that waseem did. On top of that smile when he sees me in pain watching my guy on the floor. So yeah waseem is a flawed parent but he is not a nice person in general. He is quite dark inside to be inflicting pain on others intentionally.

@dragonfly88 -- this is a cultural conflict; in our society, the parents generation thinks that if you just get two people, magically everything will work itself out. (eye roll!) our generation sees it very differently from them and so we see a disaster. will tell you from personal experience that it is very difficult for them to see our view because for them, their view worked. so it isn't cruelty or outright ignorance, but just a different world view. that cannot change in a day especially when zoya is keeping quiet.

yea waseem was behaving terribly but like I said, he is flawed but not a moron father like some that exist. there were many times that aditya's behaviour was also over the top and cruel to zoya in terms of words especially in the beginning.

P.S ~ if I had to name a moron father, that would be kashaf's dad from zindagi gulzar hai. omo, how much I felt like slapping that character for his casual cruelty and treatment to his wife and daughters. he totally got what he deserved in the end. love that show! one of my favourite dramas.

Edited by mango_pudding1 - 7 years ago

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zooni

@zooni.blue

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

I agree

.Waseem isn't terrible...

Arrange marriages are a common practice in our culture n Waseem is trying to pull Zoya into one...

Indian culture parents make decisions n kids follow... Ofcourse kids have a say but Zoya has herself accepted Arshad n denied feelings for adi then why would Waseem not want to have his way?

Infact it is Aditya who is adamant...

Zoya hasn't confessed once to him n he behaves like this

Don't get me started on faraq games... Tell me why can't Zoya have farak feels for a friend? Would u feel good if ir friend is made to do what adi did?

Waseem is being stubborn because Zoya has allowed him to be

Waseem doing that was justified coz Zoya revealed to him that every hall was booked by Aditya

...

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Maryam

@Maryam2

Stunner

Posted: 7 years ago

yeah i always felt that waseem is a concerned father.. he saw zoya go through so much pain..

but yesterday his intention was wrong.. his act was wrong.. he didn't act like a terrible dad but a bad person!

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mango

@mango.falooda

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: Maryam2
yeah i always felt that waseem is a concerned father.. he saw zoya go through so much pain..
but yesterday his intention was wrong.. his act was wrong.. he didn't act like a terrible dad but a bad person!

yea waseem was over the line with that shoe thing but I was more like "zoya, girl, say something!" ... basically when you put a lot of stubborn people in the room -- aditya, zoya, waseem -- all sorts of stupid behaviour bubbles to the top! but then again, we wouldn't be watching if it was all smooth. serials are boring without some masala! hahahaha.. 😆

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Dragonfly88

@Dragonfly88

Rocker

+ 7

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: mango_pudding1

@dragonfly88 -- this is a cultural conflict; in our society, the parents generation thinks that if you just get two people, magically everything will work itself out. (eye roll!) our generation sees it very differently from them and so we see a disaster. will tell you from personal experience that it is very difficult for them to see our view because for them, their view worked. so it isn't cruelty or outright ignorance, but just a different world view. that cannot change in a day especially when zoya is keeping quiet.

yea waseem was behaving terribly but like I said, he is flawed but not a moron father like some that exist. there were many times that aditya's behaviour was also over the top and cruel to zoya in terms of words especially in the beginning.

P.S ~ if I had to name a moron father, that would be kashaf's dad from zindagi gulzar hai. omo, how much I felt like slapping that character for his casual cruelty and treatment to his wife and daughters. he totally got what he deserved in the end. love that show! one of my favourite dramas.

Maybe you know things better from personal experience, I haven't had any experience in marriage stuff so no idea 😆 but I was just saying that waseem doesn't have to agree for Aditya instead he could have let arshad go and given Zoya sometime to calm down. Yes he is no where in comparison to kashaf's dad because he was just plain negative. Waseem has taken good care of his daughters but he is over protective too. He has seen care from zoya's side and he is insecure that he will be put down infront of her choice. Will wait few more episodes and see where they take his character

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mango

@mango.falooda

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

@dragonfly88 - think the reason waseem is pushing zoya on arshad is simply fear. he is very afraid that zoya will make another mistake just like yash and so is not giving her time because of that. so he is determined to sort of push it through. he could handle this all better but he has a caustic tongue and very stubborn. so definitely flawed.

and yea, I hated kashaf's dad so much. couldn't believe that he wouldn't even attend the wedding of his own second daughter out of some ego even when he didn't pay a single rupee for it.

Edited by mango_pudding1 - 7 years ago

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SHABLA MUSTAFA

@shabla

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

Waseem was a concerned parent all through the point till he wanted zoya to marry arshad...but from where he started to force her for marriage he has turned into an obsessed father who don't mind hurting his own daughter to get adithya out of her life...actually i never understood waseem's issue with adithya...except the past which connects them there is no logical reason at all..The guy has already faced death numerous times for his daughter and she is alive because of him...have any body it date bothered to tell him that his daughter had tried to commit suicide and adithya saved her ??? no one has i guess...yesterday he saw zoya's pain when he insulted adithya...did he stop then...no he didn't...i dont find him justifiable as a father at all...

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Deepthy

@deeps07

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

#10

Waseem was hell right about yash...but only until then..yes he is a concerned father like any normal parent..but his ways of dealing with this concern is not right..he always cocooned zoya..making her unable to see the world outside..this has a major impact on her troubles during the initial phase when she was like a bird with a broken wing targeted by mahi like people..this too i understand happens in life..parents are mostly very cocooning kind these days..my dad included..but it comes with its after effects too..

He was there when the arrest track happened..i agree thr too..but he is her dad..he does love her..nobody arguing that..and therenis nothing too greatful abt it either ..as i said.. his way to show.love is flawed..he went there only when the arrest track happened..how can a dad remain so far knwing his too.kids are out there in a far away city without any help..tht too with people like mahi and madhu..wasseem knws what kind of a girl mahi is too..so his ego did get there more than his concern for daughter..

He kept aside his pride regarding hoodas taking charge of case..but i thought it was the other way around..i mean..wasseem should be thankful to mr.hooda for keeping aside his pride and took up his daughters case too..he didnt need to do that..and he wouldnt have done that if it was not for aditya. And to top it this aditya is the person becx of whom his daughter is very much alive..and he has saved her far more times than to.keep.count even..anyone can forget it..but how can wassem and rosana forget that..rosana does like aditya..but wassem doesnt even have the courtesy to show respect for aditya..as a parent they would be indebted to anybody for saving their kids..here... forget debt..wasseem plainly hates aditya ..😕

Aditya only gave her confidence but wassem gave money for rebuilding zosh .yes..so what would have happened. With confidence people can make a hill from pebbles...but without confidence..money can't even make a cup of tea if one doesnt have the will to make it..wassem was not the one who pushed zoya to face her demons .. it was aditya..no matter how.much money wasseem spends on zosh. Zoya managed zosh imagining adityas approach on how to tackle issues. Thats what made her successful too..not the investment...

I am not saying he is an evil person..but he is so much flawed that he is harming his daughters life.. he doesnt hate aditya becz of his past with yash..but because of hus general opinion regarding hoodas..i also understand that fact abt him..any dad would be worried with such a family..but what did he do for that. He introduced arshad to make zoya away frm aditya..as a concerned and loving dad..all he needed to do was tell zoya that he is afraid aditya and she will go into a relationship if this friendship continues..and he wanted her to.keep her distance frm aditya because of that...he never did that..he just decided to marry off her when she was xlearly not ready..yes he didnt stop her from .meeting aditya..but tht was becz she agreed for his condition regarding marrg..yet anothr flaw...

U.knw the prblm here is..after everything he did..the result after yashs relatio ship with zoya caused zoya to.hear i told u so frm wasseem forever..and by now..with the relationship he is creating with arshad..he will eventually get to here the i told u so frm zoya forver in future ...though she wouldnt do tht becz its not in zoyas nature to blame someone on their pain..but .thats not what is required in life..in life..we r all trying to never have to have the i told u so ever in.life..and wasseem and zoyas relationship is onky doing that ...and aditya is trying to avoid that...thats what makes the difference..

And with aditya. Wasseem is not being evil if u ask me..he is just being an idiot and an egoistic fool...

Eoaah..wasseem does make my blood boil.. 😆.i can never justify him..

Edited by deeps07 - 7 years ago