Arhi FF: Protecting the Past (Chapter 6 updated) - Page 4

Originally posted by: sweta_b

I don't know how I just found this story ...
Finally a very different one... waiting for the next part

Originally posted by: ranogill

awesome story ...i think khushi will find Arnav a worthy partner...and they both will be an anchor to each other

Originally posted by: mu12

Hats off .its a great concept and people dare to write

Chapter 6: Love Thyself

I wasn't even a teenager, merely in grade 3, when I realized the meaning of having that fluttering feeling in my stomach every time I looked at my English teacher. I always had the highest grade in her class and my friends would always tease me about me being her favorite student. Every time the other students wouldn't be able to answer her questions, she would point at me and I would flush red but answer her nonetheless. After class, my friends would tease me about how I had turned red. Sometimes, I would feel annoyed at her for embarrassing me in front of my classmates but at the same time, I would feel jealous whenever she would praise another student.

I knew her as Ms. Gomez. She helped that shy kid in third grade who found it difficult to make friends because of his thick Indian accent. My parents were always worried about me becoming American and forgetting my roots, so I was not allowed to speak English at home. Even though I appreciate their decisions now, I had felt upset at them because I knew nothing of the "American culture, so I struggled to make friends.

In third grade, when I was that lonely kid, Ms. Gomez had acted as my hero and helped bring up my confidence level. She would often talk about her parents' home country and sometimes bring special Mexican dishes for her students. While all the students would bravely get in line for seconds, I would sit in the corner too shy to ask for another round of her delicious food. But she would always save me some of those dishes on the side and give it to me after class.

She had noticed that I sat alone during lunch and didn't talk to any other kids. At first she had tried to get few kids to talk to me but seeing that it was making me more uncomfortable, she stopped. Instead, she started sitting with me and talking to me. In her I had found a friend for life. She is the only one to whom I have confided my deepest secrets. Even till this day, I continue to visit her. How could I not? She had taught me some very important life lessons; she taught me to be proud of my identity, she taught me the importance of being true to myself, and more importantly she taught me to love myself.

Today, as I look at Khushi's teary eyes and trembling lips as she talks about how she came to learn about her sexual orientation, I can't help but thank Ms. Gomez for helping me feel secure in my identity; for teaching me to take pride in who I am.

"You know Arnav, I kept asking myself if there is something wrong with me. While my friends would gush about Salman Khan, I would find myself daydreaming about Aishwarya Rai. And eventually, when I came to the terms that I'm gay, I found myself attracted to some guys. I guess the term "bisexual" would fit me the best but I am not sure. I just feel weird and abnormal. I'm afraid to tell anyone because what if I tell someone and it gets out? But I need to know. I want this confusion, this uncertainty to go away," she finally looked at me in the eyes as if begging me to help her out.

I know what she needs but seeing her reaction few other times whenever I had brought up the topic, I am not sure if she is ready to accept my suggestion. I give it a shot anyways, "I think you should join a LGBTQ organization, or go to some events. You know try to meet people who are on the same boat as you."

As expected, she gets defensive and starts making excuses, "No, I can't. I get so nervous even thinking about it. You know my parents come from a very conservative family in India. If they find out, they will disown me for sure."

She is not wrong in her fears but I personally believe that if someone in your life cannot accept you and love you for who you are, they don't deserve you even if they are your "family". I am not going to say this to her because I know this will not solve the problem. Instead I take her hand in mine and caress the back of her hand softly and say, "But Khushi, they are not even here in New York City. They are in Missouri. What are the chances of them finding out? Very low. You should give it a try at least once and if it doesn't work out, we can try something else."

She ponders over what I just said and replies, "I guess you are right. I actually thought about this before but was just feeling very scared to go to any organization or event." She holds her hands together and biting her lips asks hesitantly, "Will you? I mean do you? like I mean if it's not too much, can you come with me?"

She looks like an innocent child right now, so vulnerable yet so endearing. I want to kiss her until she realizes her place in my life, until she understands that I am not letting go of her, until she takes pride in being such a wonderful person that she is.

I smile at her and say, "Of course! You know what, I will do the research for you. I have a close friend who happens to be gay and a very social creature. He knows a lot of the LGBTQ events. I will ask him for you."

And finally, like a sun hiding behind the clouds, she finally smiles and I can see a twinkle in her eyes. I feel the same kind of flutter I used to feel every time I looked at Ms. Gomez but I feel something else as well. There is this another feeling; some kind of sweet pain and makes me feel vulnerable. It makes me feel protective of this woman in front of me and want hold her in my arms forever. I want to hold her and make love to her until she learns to love every part of herself just the way I have started to love every part of hers.

Like every weekend for the past two months, we had spent this weekend together and Khushi had slept over but unlike other times when she slept on my bed and I slept on my couch, we slept together on my bed. My desire for owning this woman's body grows everyday but I don't want to rush things with her. I want her to be strong enough by herself before we take our intimacy to next level. I bring her closer by her waist and gently kiss her forehead.

I gently caress her waist and put my hand underneath her t-shirt to feel her soft skin. She puts her head on my chest, one of her arms wrapped around my waist. I don't know when I fell asleep but I haven't felt this relaxed in a long time.

Like or comment would be great to keep me motivated! 😛(but only if you like what you're reading though 😉). Let me know if you would like PMs for the future updates. Thank you!

Fabulous the story is getting interesting after every chapter n the way arnav is helping her in no time she will come out of her shell n with him she will start a new life bcoz she just have to overcome her fears n i also want her ro be ok.

loved it or i can say i love Arnav ..

Arnav is right. Meeting other people with same feelings will help her.

Interesting start

Very nice and realistic story