Arhi FF: Protecting the Past (Chapter 6 updated) - Page 2

Originally posted by: ayeshapasta

Finally a different kind of ff

Originally posted by: coderlady

What will happen if she gets attracted to a girl again?

Chapter 4: Finally Home

He spent only four years at Cornell University studying Business Economics but it was during those four years that he became the man he is now. The first two years of undergrad were filled with lots of fun: going to parties, hooking up with strangers, and trying out different drugs. He didn't realize when fun turned into a way of getting out of his personal troubles at home. He didn't realize when fun became an obsession and soon turned into an addiction that forced him into drug abuse and eventually depression and anxiety.

Family wasn't much help especially due to the lack of awareness with mental health in his community. He justified their harsh and insensitive words by blaming it on the society they grew up in. But when they continued to shower him with phrases such as "be a man", "stop being selfish", "stop feeling sorry for yourself", he couldn't stop the hate that was building up inside him. He started getting nightmares of seeing his family members dead but even in those nightmares when he would wake up crying, he felt a strange sense of peace. He started questioning if that is what he wanted. He started becoming numb to emotions. Then, he started comparing himself to the sociopaths who kill people and animals with no remorse. He asked himself several times if that's what he was becoming.

He felt like a zombie who was alive on the outside but dead on the inside. But something snapped in him when the only person he ever trusted broke his trust, his sister. She accused him of being selfish and not thinking about his family. He had never cried as much as he did that night when Anjali confronted him. She tried to get him to open up and when he had said he needs little more time, she had become angry and screamed, "How much f**king time do you need? Mom and dad already have so much problems because of finances. I don't even know why the f**k they adopted you. We were already buried deep in debt. Why don't you stop being selfish and do something to help this family!"

That had hurt, so badly that he forgot how to breathe for few minutes. He had looked up at her to see her closing her eyes and regret written all over her face.

"I didn't mean that. You know, I didn't. I was just mad and... " nothing she said mattered after that. The damage was done. It wasn't the first time she had said hurtful things to him. It was her nature to speak her mind without thinking of repercussions. Sometimes it was necessary but sometimes it left permanent bruises like that night.

That was the first time he got a panic attack and he had hated himself even more when she had hugged him to make him calm down. Instead of care he had seen pity in her eyes and he felt her judging him for being weak, and he hated it. After the panic attack had subsided and Anjali has quietly moved out of his room, he had texted NK, his best friend of three years, "I don't think I can take this anymore.

His friend had acted as an anchor hoisting him up while he was drowning into the deep sea. He hadn't cared that it was 2 a.m. in the morning or that he lived 2 hours away. He had drove to Arnav's house that night and stayed up whole night holding him close to his chest as he cried his heart out.

The next day, NK helped him pack his bags and left the house where he was never truly accepted. He was always an obligation to his uncle and aunt who had taken him in after his parents' death. Anjali had apologized and begged him to stay back but NK had held his hand and taken him away from the people who didn't deserve his love.

The first month had been terrifying for NK; at the beginning, Arnav would cry a lot and after a while the crying had stopped. He started having neutral expression as if he couldn't feel any emotions. It was when NK started noticing cut marks on Arnav shoulders and chest, that he decided to put his foot down and take him to a therapist even if that meant forcing him.

It had taken a year for Arnav to finally show progress and rejoin school. He cut himself out of his family. He would visit them once in a while during special occasions. Despite of everything he had gone through and all the hurt they had cause him, they had taken him in, cared for him, and given him food and shelter.

Even though his conversations to Anjali were always kept to minimum, she would still manage to make him feel like a shitty person and would eventually apologize for saying all those things. It had taken a lot of therapy sessions for him to admit that even though Anjali loved him like her own brother, she was emotionally abusive and manipulative. Sometimes, even though we might love our family and they might love us, we have to create a distance because the love turns out to be toxic, his therapist had said.

It had taken him years but he had rebuilt himself; he had risen from the ashes like a Phoenix. He graduated magna cum laude, went to nation's top business school and was now counted as one of the most successful business men in the world.

"What happened that you turned to drugs? Khushi asked and then added defensively, "...if you don't mind me asking."

"It's kind of a long story and also something I don't feel comfortable talking about."

He closed his eyes and leaned against the couch feeling the weight of his entire body on the cold floor of his living room. It felt extremely light to be able to share his feelings without feeling like the other person is judging you or pitying you.

He didn't know why he shared all of this with Khushi but it just came naturally. On one hand it made him happy to finally have someone who he can trust but on the other hand, it terrified him of the fact that one day he would end up opening up all the pandora's boxes. That one day this amazing women will make him comfortable enough to open up his past to her and give her the power to destroy him.

He turned to look at Khushi to find her gazing through the window lost in her own thoughts. He held her by her shoulder and pulled her closer to him. She found herself sitting in between his legs leaning against his chest. They both closed their eyes trying to forget all the terrible things they have been through. Both felt the kind of peace that they hadn't felt before. Despite of only knowing each other for a month, the connection they had felt like ages old.

She was holding him as if he was her most valued possession and he felt as if he was finally home, where he belonged after 30 years of his life.

Like or comment would be great to keep me motivated! 😛(but only if you like what you're reading though 😉).

Arnav hasn't had a happy family life. Guess these two will prove to be each other's solace.

Arnav had a terrible past poor soul had to suffer so much in his younger years but he was lucky to have a friend like NK who stood by his side n is responsible to bring him back to life n i really hope as now he found khusi both of them will become eachother's support in their lives n i wish khusi finds her true love in arnav.

Originally posted by: coderlady

Arnav hasn't had a happy family life. Guess these two will prove to be each other's solace.

Originally posted by: Uzii

Arnav had a terrible past poor soul had to suffer so much in his younger years but he was lucky to have a friend like NK who stood by his side n is responsible to bring him back to life n i really hope as now he found khusi both of them will become eachother's support in their lives n i wish khusi finds her true love in arnav.

Chapter 5: Hopelessness

"I'm sorry but I can't."

He wasn't sure if he heard her right. He held her hand across the table and squeezed it gently to encourage her to speak what was bothering her for past few days. He was expecting her to rant about her supervisor or her coworker but not this.

Everything was going so well. They had been seeing each other for almost two months now and had started spending a lot of time with each other. Sometimes he would be at her apartment and sometimes she would be at his. They had started forming this relationship that could be called friendship but also something more.

Was it because of the slow pace in their physical intimacy, he asked her directly.

"It's not that. It's just been really hard on me especially since Lavanya's wedding." She paused for a moment to look at his reaction. When she didn't see any kind of emotions on his face, she continued, "I loved her you know. It's not easy to let go. And I really like you but I feel guilty."

She scrunched her eyes and tried to get her hand out of his hold but he kept holding on to hers as if he was letting her know silently that he wasn't going to let her run away. She looked into his eyes which were filled with empathy and feeling more comfortable kept going, "I don't really know how to explain it because I myself don't know what exactly is it that I feel. But I've never felt the way I feel about you with anyone, not even Lavanya. And sometimes I get confused because if I really loved her as I claim to have, shouldn't it be harder for me to move on with someone else and develop such strong feelings so quickly. I'm confused."

By the end of it, her face was flushed and eyes stung. She felt frustrated and she wanted to scream, cry and just cover her face, hide her emotions from this man who seemed to have no trouble reading her. She was glad that they were in his apartment and not somewhere public because one thing she hated more than anything was feeling vulnerable. She hated crying in front of people. The pain that she was trying so hard to cover had become more obvious as she started spending more time with Arnav. He made her feel so safe and secure that she wanted to share all her fears with him.

She tried to snatch her hand from his hold so she can stop herself from speaking too much or revealing too much about her but he kept holding on. She looked at him with tear filled eyes and said with as much courage as she could gather, "But I know that us will not work out. I'm sorry but we can't see each other anymore."

"No, that's not possible," he stated plainly with a straight face as if that was a universal truth.

She looked at him with eyes filled with sorrow and helplessness, "We can't Arnav. Try to understand. I can't ok."

Soon the sadness turned into anger and she forcefully pulled her hand out of his hand. Standing up angrily, she screamed, "Why the f**k can't you get it? I can't do it okay? You just don't get it, do you! I am a mess and I have so much baggage. I'm a f**king titanic about to sink. I don't want to bring you down with me."

By the time she was done, she felt exhausted and her legs felt weak. She wanted to collapse on the floor, close her eyes and never wake up.

She raised her head to look into his eyes, ready to spit venom so poisonous from her lips that he himself would never want to see her again. But her words never came out. She kept looking at him with hopelessness as he walked towards her. She kept looking into his hazel eyes as he snaked his hand around her waist. And finally, she found herself breathing again as he gently pressed his lips to hers. His tongue found a way into her mouth tasting her rasberry chapstick. He pulled her closer, his hand caressing her waist gently.

She can't remember how long they kissed or who pulled apart first but when she finally opened her eyes to look back into his eyes, she felt the feeling of hopelessness that has been making a home in her head for few years slowly drifting away.

He kissed her one more time before gently caressing her cheeks and saying, "I don't know what exactly you were trying to say but we will unravel our baggages together. One day at a time. And Khushi, you are the best thing that has happened to me in a long time and I'm not letting you go."

Poor khusi these feelings are new to her n she is confused I think she never loved lavanya in a true sense n now with arnav she is experiencing new things n is really frustrated that why she can't even feel sad of lavanya being married n leaving her alone but rather she is happy n normal with arnav but arnav is right they will unreveal their baggage together.

Hi