Difference between a daughter and daughter in law

We have already seen that pooja's MIL is so double standard person who was angry with Pooja dressing up as Chandni without a pallu on her head while here her daughter is happily holding Sameer's hands and roaming around and she is comfortable with all this😡

its quite prevalent in today's times as well... i wish people start considering DIL as human first. some times the expectations are set so high that it is nearly impossible for DILs to survive...

I agree that it discriminatory...but I will try to explain this to best of my ability loll...I am not an expert...This has been my observation when psychoevaluating people lol


Mother does not see her daughter as a competition however daughter in law is a competition. What do I mean by that??


- A mother raises her son all her life. To her, she has been center of her son's world all his life.Center of his attention. From birth until right before marriage.
- Now suddenly the son gets married. Though she maybe happy for him, she feels like she is being pushed into a corner. She is no longer the center of his world. She is not able to be vocal about it because she is happy seeing her son happy and she feels that if she was vocal about it, her son may distance himself from her as his priorities have changed. So this mother, now a mother in law, tries to find attention elsewhere. How?? by trying to control the object of her son's desire (ie the daughter in law). She does not wish be this way, but her insecurity and her sense of lack of importance in her son's life after his marriage, makes her behave this way...Its the feeling of losing self worth in her son's life.

How can you tackle this situation?
- get your hubbies to spend some time with your inlaws, especially mother in law at the end of the day daily. And don't come in picture during the mother and son alone time. It usually gets them the feeling of self worth again.

Same goes for father in law, and son in law...though father's can't be vocal about it, they do feel envious to the son in law's for making him the second important thing in his daughter's life. As until now, he was the most important thing in his daughter's life.

btw this is not just prevalent in India, its across the world 😆

I hope it makes sense what I said lol



ridz

Even I felt...she talks so much abt sanskaar and here her daughter is roaming freely...this discrimination even happens today at many places.. .when the girls have proved themselves to b equal to boys yet this happens...v yet have male dominating the society!!!

You are right ...but this is not between DIL and Daughters...we get to see this between Son and SILs too...just that with Son in laws they don't make it that obvious...and again it differs from place to place too...this diff betwn Son and SIL is more evident in society which is matriarchal /matrilineal...

but things have changed a lot now...both boys and girls don't take nonsense from any one and they know to keep their side of relatives quiet...the new gen is very smart and good at ppl management... 😆

It is quite common, even now. Don't know when we will get out of this mentality.

It's true yrr everyone do this difference.. agar beti kr rh h to sahi or bahu ne kiya to galat..

U know what...no offence to anyone but I've seen even in this generation their are women who take pride in being the mother of a boy...just like o bai n MIL...that's so sick! Esp if they act rudely to others who might have a daughter or two...kya mindset hai yaar...padhne ka bhi koi fayeda nai...

Originally posted by: paagalbandar

I agree that it discriminatory...but I will try to explain this to best of my ability loll...I am not an expert...This has been my observation when psychoevaluating people lol


Mother does not see her daughter as a competition however daughter in law is a competition. What do I mean by that??


- A mother raises her son all her life. To her, she has been center of her son's world all his life.Center of his attention. From birth until right before marriage.
- Now suddenly the son gets married. Though she maybe happy for him, she feels like she is being pushed into a corner. She is no longer the center of his world. She is not able to be vocal about it because she is happy seeing her son happy and she feels that if she was vocal about it, her son may distance himself from her as his priorities have changed. So this mother, now a mother in law, tries to find attention elsewhere. How?? by trying to control the object of her son's desire (ie the daughter in law). She does not wish be this way, but her insecurity and her sense of lack of importance in her son's life after his marriage, makes her behave this way...Its the feeling of losing self worth in her son's life.

How can you tackle this situation?
- get your hubbies to spend some time with your inlaws, especially mother in law at the end of the day daily. And don't come in picture during the mother and son alone time. It usually gets them the feeling of self worth again.

Same goes for father in law, and son in law...though father's can't be vocal about it, they do feel envious to the son in law's for making him the second important thing in his daughter's life. As until now, he was the most important thing in his daughter's life.

btw this is not just prevalent in India, its across the world 😆

I hope it makes sense what I said lol



ridz

Very well explained by you, Ridz! 👏