If i did not know you, I wpuld have assumed the author to be atleast twenty.
The conflict in your heart and mind when you are friends and sonething more, getting to the point of actually transitioning into a lover and acknowledging your feelings even to your own self... Tough !
And you are portraying it very well here. When you dont want to be the first one to accept and make a fool of yourself... Perfectly done.intrigued to know more.
Good job kiddo.