*Season 2, Week 12* Analysis Threade - Page 46

Originally posted by: Shaavi

@Grace. Sonakshi as Sam mentioned was the unquestioned decision maker of Bose family. She was constantly told that what decisions were right for her were right for the whole family. She was also told that she can never do wrong, that her understanding is always right. Even Dev fueled these notion by saying "you are always right Ms. Bose". Similar to how Ishwari thought what she was doing was for Dev's own good, Sonakshi assumed that her decisions were never wrong.

As to Sonakshi being irrational now, she always was to a certain degree since before, but is was not so very visible as it is now. On the first night of their marriage, when Sonakshi' came to know of the reason for Ishwari's acceptance of her, she was shocked. What Sonakshi was expecting at that point was complete acceptance of her. How she saw this non acceptance of her was, how she differed from Natasha who she thought had Ishwari's complete approval. She thinks Ishwari disliked her for her socio economic status. What she is yet to understand is that this dislike stems from insecurity and not the reason as she thinks it to be. Ishwari did not have any problem with Sonakshi being a Bengali or from middle class. This is the reason why Dev got angry when Sonakshi made that comment after she came to know partial truth regarding the jewelry theft.

Sonakshi blames Dev as not knowing how to balance relationships when she is the one who has less understanding of that. When she wanted to bond with Ishwari, she asked her for the halwa recipe. Once she got it, she asked Ishwari to leave the kitchen, went to make the halwa on her own, changed the recipe as per her and expected to get perfect halwa. Here she tried to run even before she has learnt to stand. Conversely when Dev wanted to make muri ghaanto for Suhana, he followed the recipe Asha gave. He also did not just ask her to leave him giving the recipe. He did not make Asha feel left out. But that is exactly how Sonakshi made Ishwari feel. It is something that Sonakshi is yet to realize. She first needs to acknowledge that she did not really push attention to other people's feelings, but just assumed what she wanted and went with her actions and decisions.

During the halwa episode or the shopping episode, what Sonakshi needed to do was be with Ishwari and try to understand her. Not leave her or try to do everything by herself. This is what made Ishwari so insecure that she felt Sonakshi was trying to replace her.

This does not really absolve Ishwari or Dev for what they did. All I mean is the fault doesn't just lay at their door, but also falls is on Sonakshi and Bijoy who acted impulsively without thinking, without paying attention to details and assuming that they were perfect and correct.

Sonakshi needs an eye opener for her "perfect" syndrome. She is a person who believes in fairy tale where the FL is the epitome of virtues like the FL is gentle, kind, understanding even to those who dislike her, like Cinderella or Sno White. This is how she saw herself as and behaved during her married phase. She expected a similar ending as these stories portray. But when the story did not go the way she wanted, she changed the narrative(as Sam mentioned) and labeled Dixits as the tyrants and herself as the rebel who braved to stand against them to protect her family. This is the story she has been telling herself for the past 7 years.

As Sam mentioned, Sonakshi is trying very hard to avoid introspection on her part. Cause if she starts that then she will have to admit that she is not perfect and that she was also at fault which makes her narrative not the whole truth. By admitting her faults she will have to admit that Bijoy is at fault too. That he is not the perfect dad or husband as she idolizes him to be. For Sonakshi and Bijoy it is not easy and is extremely hard to accept their mistakes. The only way they will do so is by breaking down. All of her actions and taunts to Dev is to avoid that introspection which is long due.

Originally posted by: Shaavi

The interesting part will be Ronita who respects Dev coming as the "daughter" to Bose house. If Bijoy wanted Sonakshi to have the same place in IN to what she had in Bose house as the unquestioned decision maker, chances are Mrs. T has similar expectations regarding Ronita's place in Bose house. Will Bijoy be ok if Ronita starts making decisions without consulting them and expect them to accept it without rejecting it. Similarly will Sonakshi be ok when Ronita supports Dev while she is opposing him.

Originally posted by: ltelidevara

Cooking is an art by itself. No one can master it instantly and become a good cook. When we get married and enter our husband's house cooking and food habits play a major role in forming relationships or breaking relationships.( not really Ofcourse ) Generally husbands will get used to MIL's recipes and relish them till then. Any kind of change they won't welcome but they will change with the passage of time.

Before marriage I did not even know how to make coffee perfectly. I ought to learn everything from my MIL and I realised it is not as easy as scoring top ranks in studies. I specialised in Mathematics and also did PG in Sanskrit due to my father's wish. I never found it difficult to stay at top but cooking? It took so long for me to become a reasonably good cook . My husband always used to taunt." Mummy makes it taste better." Yes I used to get hurt but not like Sonakshi who took it as offence when Dev criticised her halwa.

Iswari suggested Sonakshi to learn Suji ka halwa first because basin ka halwa is not that easy to learn instantly and it is not easy to make it with perfection. Sona did not listen. Dev likes basin ka halwa so I will learn that only. She was adamant. Iswari could not help but tell her the recipe . Sonakshi's attitude is like since she is perfect she can directly learn the difficult dish.

In classical music first we have to learn Varnas to reach the stage to learn kritis.or Kirtanas. If we directly attempt Kirtanas we won't be able to possess the grip on the rythym,raag and taal. Sonakshi's zid is similar to this. If she made Suji ka halwa she would have made basin ka halwa just the right way. Here Iswari said so not because of her insecurity but due to her wide experience. Like Shaavi said she did not let Iswari guide her. She did it as she thought. The result is obvious. It would have been nice if she accepted her failure and attempted again without paying attention to Dev's remarks she would have mastered it.

Sonakshi is a perfectionist or she thinks so. She would have really become perfect had she kept aside her ego and proceeded further. I know everything,I can master anything...This kind of over confidence becomes a stumbling block in learning new things in life.

Agree with Shaavi who explained so well. Nothing more to add.