Posted:
I was reading some posts yesterday in the forum and quite surprised to see some people were actually blaming Sona for getting angry at Dev.
Well, let's see here.
1. First of all, being insulted in one's own wedding constantly kinda puts damper to one's mood.
No one feels ecstatic when the day they have been waiting forever gets ruined.
2. Being blamed for a fiasco which one has no input on, also doesn't necessary makes people jump in joy.
Let's see how I can put it better.
A girl leaves her family, her independence, her very loving and protective family behind for a man and agrees to live with HIS family where his mother behaves as if she is the owner of the house where she makes the rules and everyone follows like sheep. That does not make a home ANY woman would enter with joy.
3. When the insults continues again of NO FAULT of her own and the guy you are tolerating everything for remains silent, again, puts a huge question mark on your relationship. And no, understanding does not come pouring out when no one is bothering to understand this newly wedded bride being treated like unwanted pest in her new home.
4. Ishwari is amazing. What strength when it comes to defending her own son from his wife, but so weak when it comes to the same wife she went begging for.
Ishwari, you don't have to love your son's wife. But the way you pretended throughout the wedding, anyone who hasn't seen you in action in previous episodes will think, this was an arranged marriage that you have personally set up. But the second she stepped into your household, you changed your colour like a chameleon. Almost like in your mental checklist, you ticked off toy for Dev - DONE!!!
Did anyone notice the scene when Sona stepped foot into the house after stepping into the red water, how Ishwari sucked in her breath? If you missed it, go watch it again. It's the same uncomfortable breath we take when someone invades our personal space whom we can't push away.
5. Some people are complaining why Sona did not sleep with Dev because that would have tipped the scale in her favour.
No, really. I am not making this up. Someone seriously expected her to use her body to manipulate her husband. Great advice for women kind. When all else fails, use your body.
Wow!!! I am probably a naive woman to think that the fact that I love my husband and he loves me, whether I am angry or upset or arguing or silent or at my very worst self, I will be loved regardless.
And if I have to keep my thoughts and pains to myself and have to hide how I am feeling, then what kind of love is this where honesty = love is gone? If I can't share my problems with my husband, then why I am married to him? I am not there only to share his problems and hiding my own.
He may not like what I am saying just like I am not liking what he is saying but NOTHING can make the love go away. Not from my heart and certainly not from his.
I should be able to say what I want, however want to my husband because he is MY HUSBAND. Half of my soul, half of my heart and half of my life.
I don't have to compete with his mother using my body like a weapon which I know she can't provide.
But then that's me. I don't think just because Sona is a woman,
1. Being angry and upset with her husband for her ill treatment by HIS family is wrong or unreasonable,
2. Expressing her concern with someone she is about to spend her life with is not her right.
3. Refusing to sleep with her husband on her wedding night *GASP* after the truck load of insults is unreasonable. And no marriage is NOT a license to have sex whether a wife wants it or not. And yes, using one's body as a weapon to manipulate one's husband is as despicable as using motherhood examples to manipulate one's son.
No one would expect Dev to fall into bed with Sona if Bijoy had been insulting him for something that was not his fault and Sona remained silent. Imagine if Dev had to deal with the same insults that Sona dealt with for something that was not his fault, can you imagine him being silent? And would you think him justified if he asked Sona why he is having to deal with this?
Can't imagine that scenario? Of course it's hard. We are so used to trying to protect the precious men's honour and dignity and so used to stripping a woman's down that we can't even imagine when a woman refuses to give up her honour for the sake of pleasing her husband.
I usually don't care about other people's mentality as long as they don't challenge mine. They can live as they want. But as a woman, I was offended by the regressive attitude people have in our society and even more offended when other women applaud that thought.
Men can't drag women down as much we women bring each other down. Instead of standing up in solidarity, we seek to find faults in the women's behaviour, sic one women against another. If mother is happy, wife has to be sad; if wife is happy, mother has to be sad. And oh the poor man being sandwiched between mother and wife when he is the one who is forcing his wife and mother to live under the same roof despite their differences so that he can have his cake and eat it too.
And this is precisely why even in 21st century, we are JUST talking about women's empowerment.
