The Cringe Factor: All against typical notions of society

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Niharika Mishra

@NiharikaMishra

Dazzler

+ 8

Posted: 9 years ago

Hello Friends,

I have been a silent reader in the forum here and an on and off watcher of this show and have recently become a regular because of the twist revealed here, obviously. I could put two and two together about a lot of things now, why Maninder and Bebe changed their behaviour on Saumya's birth, why they always gave awful looks to her, never let her go out lest she gets "exposed", why Nimmi had her doubts on whether Saumya would have a married life at all or not, etc. etc.

And then, Saya's words seemed to make a lot of sense. That such people can never have normal lives, its the privilege of only the people born normal. After watching the revelation episode, I logged on to IF which was filled with a lot of sympathetic discussions about things like,

1. Saumya just has a physical disorder that needs cure

2. They are not using the right words for her, she is a woman and will live like one

3. Hoping that they show her get back to normal soon.

4. Transgender not Kinnar, then intersex not transgender, and some more other words

And I was like, is the normalcy only limited to Saumya ending up being a typical girl and have a typical relationship with Harman. Why can't she still remain biologically same and be accepted? And if she is physically not what Harman wants or is comfortable with, why is it necessary that she should get "cured" or "operated"? Aren't we, somewhat supporting what Maninder and Bebe think about this here?

Is it really that difficult to come to terms with the fact that the lead of a show can be a trans-gender?

I use that term here and a lot of people would come about to correct me that she is not a trans-gender, but an inter-sex.

But what if she actually is a transgender? A transgender who loves a man?

Sounds cringe-worthy right?

I wrote in an explanation in another thread here and while reading for it before I wrote I came across a lot of articles about how trans-genders and inter-sex people are treated by their own families, to bring them down to social standards of normalcy. Here's a gentle one,

InterSex Fact Sheet by United Nations

Its time we opened our own minds a little bit and think about such people, who have grown to be comfortable in their own skin (Saumya never realised something was "wrong" with her till told by Nimmi) but are forced to undergo risky surgical operations to become "normal", else are made to face utter discrimination for remaining what they are.

Honestly, I would be very disappointed with the makers if they try to show Saumya trying to be come "normal" and give us a typical romantic happy end. After taking up such a bold topic, a sad end would still be sensible, but not something like this

P.S. Readers, I am ready for all you flying chappals and other comments here, in case I have given a rude shock to your romantic future plans for HaYa. Bring it on... 😊

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Frequent Posters

overactor

@overactor

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

I am a silent reader too😊

anyways to ans u, if she is indeed a transgender she would have normal genitals and a transgender who loves a man makes no sense, transgenders feel they r in the wrong body , a gay transgender if she is then that makes her a normal girl 🤪

and well if she is transgender she doesnt know but her parents know since birth 😕

and yeah not all intersex conditions have complete cures but they can enjoy somewhat normal life and harman is normal and why wouldnt he want to get his wife cured why wouldnt somya want to be cured and enjoy a near normal life

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965319

Suspended

Posted: 9 years ago

I don't see why you should get flying chappals😆.This is fiction and everyone has different fictional preferences.

What you say is logical too,Harman is shown as someone with normal sexual desires and he can get married to someone else and still support Saumya- you don't need to be married to a person to support them, especially a marriage jiski buniyaad hi jhoot pe hai.

Having said that,I don't think that is how the story is going to be-IMO it's going be pretty much how you have written as you would'nt want happening-Saumya will be cured to make her the best wife to Harman and the best mother to his kid's and that's ok too if that is what Saumya herself desires.

The maker's claim that the this is an unconventional love story and that is what they are going to show.

Edited by mai1moono - 9 years ago

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Frozen11

@Frozen11

Explorer

Posted: 9 years ago

I was thinking along the same lines. Why ppl want to cure her? Why do they hate surbhi inbetween hay a? Some of them r even against surrogacy? They want somu to have a normal life like any other girl. Aren't we thinking like maninder n Bebe? Is romance so important in life? Somu will not open her mouth even if harman suggests a cure for her. She is too docile. She will have no say in the matter. After having taken up this bold issue wishes the makers proceed along the same line till the end. I started watching for Vivian but I don't want harman fighting all her battles. Let this girl come out of her cocoon n live life the way she wants as she is. They r many bloopers in the show like how she never knew her own body, how did know about kinnars, etc.,etc. This is Indian tv n anything is possible here. I'm all prepared to watch this journey of somu with or without harman by her side.

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sparklingeyes

@sparklingeyes

Inactive

Posted: 9 years ago

I really don't have problem if what u said is shown in the show.

Because if harman's love is true he will accept her the way she is. That is the first step of their love being true. They have to show this whatever condition or disorder saumya has no matter. Cure n all is secondary. But if they show a medical condition in future rather than transgender it will also be an eye opener for people who sometimes mistake such conditions being transgender or something rather than consulting a doctor.

Everyone wants to have a normal life n if saumya wants that too ( in future not before harman accepting her the way she is) I don't think anyone should have problem

N it's true that families r still unaware about treatments n then leave their children with kinnars

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Ishu

@Pani.Puri

Sparkler

Posted: 9 years ago

I really don't know what CV's are trying to show and what they will show in future . But I hope that they have done enough research and understood the pros and cons of showing a particular thing in the show 🤔🤔

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Mona (Rashmi)

@Mona_90

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

Let's Hope For Best..
Wait for story to unfold and harman's reaction..

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Siya

@Siya2202

Voyager

Posted: 9 years ago

I also agree with your point. I want harman to love and support somu the way she is. Also i want somu to make her own identity in the society and not always hiding behind people.

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Niharika Mishra

@NiharikaMishra

Dazzler

+ 8

Posted: 9 years ago

Originally posted by: overactor
I am a silent reader too😊
anyways to ans u, if she is indeed a transgender she would have normal genitals and a transgender who loves a man makes no sense, transgenders feel they r in the wrong body , a gay transgender if she is then that makes her a normal girl 🤪
and well if she is transgender she doesnt know but her parents know since birth 😕
and yeah not all intersex conditions have complete cures but they can enjoy somewhat normal life and harman is normal and why wouldnt he want to get his wife cured why wouldnt somya want to be cured and enjoy a near normal life

Thanks for your inputs. What you mention is only one type of transgenders who are women feeling like men which is female to male (FTM) category. They also include male to female (MTF), not-men, not-women, in-between man and woman, or neither man nor woman.

Again, it has got nothing to do with sexual preference. In Saumya's case, it would be that she likes men, and that she is genetically female who is underdeveloped and hence falls into the not-women category of transgenders, if she identifies herself as a transgender. Also, if she identifies herself as a woman, she will be an intersex.

Since she is not male genetically, she can't be called gay (which includes normal men and genetically male transgenders, who like men)

Transgender and Intersex people can be called somewhat incomplete. And if its a survival issue, I would recommend Saumya gets operated.

But if it is only a case of societal pressure and bearing children (provided Harman still wants to live with her), why should she go under the knife just because she is not a perfect woman?

And even if Harman does not support her, I believe she should not go for the "cures", rather fight for people like her, who are denied normal living rights and outcasted from the society.