Akdha ss: A Spiritual Love ON HOLD till august - Page 14

Chapter 4

PRESENT

"who din mere is choti si zindagi ki naya savera tha Jodha jo tum meri zindagi me laayi thi. Or aaj main usdin ke liye tumse thaks kehna chahunga. Thank you Jodha. Us waqt mujhe pata nahi tha ki meri zindagi bas kuch hi dino ki mohtaaj hai. Per us chand dino me tumne mujhe samjhaya ke jeete jee Jannat naseeb hona kise kehte hai. Warna ab mujhe dekho. Ab toh main kuch bhi nahi hu bas ek ruh hu. Jo insaan jais ashareer dharan kar sakta hai baas. Per fir insan nahi ban sakta. Firse who dino ko nahi jee sakta jo maine tumhare sath jiye. Main ek aisa ruh hu, jo ab bas sukun ki talash me tumhari nigaho ko tarash ta hai. Jeete jee tumhe main pane ka khwaab dekhta tha. Per ab to who bhi nahi ho sakta. Kyu ki ab to zinda sirf mera ehsas hai, mera sharer nahi. Zinda mera pyar hai per main nahi." Jalal blurred out his inner feelings which was buried inside for the long time.

Jodha freeze for the moment. An unknown happiness and joy filled in her heart. He just confessed his feelings but still she can't believe her ears. She want to confirm it with proper words. Her eyes filled with tears, a sweet smile came on her lips. She only said, "What? What's that mean?"

Jalal looks at her with love filling eyes. He soften his eyes and cupped her face with his icy cold palm, and speak, "yes Jodha those re the words I want to tell you that day of my accident and again after my death, next day after your birthday. But you might scared of my appearance. I fell for you on your first sight. Your every single act affects me to such extant that I can't take my eyes of you all the time you near me. I wanted to be with you all the time that I said a lie to my boss for a half day leave to spend time with you, to be beside you. All that I did for you Jodha. Only for you."

A big fat lone tear slide down towards her lips. Jalal saw this. He looks I her eyes which reflects only love for him. He somewhere knows that she also feel the same way as him. He again looked at that tear drop which is now holt on her upper lips. He didn't waste any further time. He kept his cold chill lips on hers and suck the teardrop. But after sucking the tear he can't remove his lips from her.

The chillness of his lips made her shiver. Its feel like a magic to her. May be his lips are cold as ice but its create an opposite effect on her. It put fire inside her body. Fire to burn him on her blaze. Fire to hold him and glued him to her body for ever. Her mind know its not possible and warning her, but her heart and body refuse to listen.

"I Love You Jodhaaa..." Jalal said like a whisper and give a final peck on her lips. He looked at her with love. Her eyes were still closed, feeling the chillness of his lips on her. He saw a sparkle shinning in the corner of her eyes. He kissed it away. She open her eyes. Jalal started to tell further,

"Yes I love you Jodha. But don't think that I love you for your beauty and charm. Yes that indeed work on me but sach kahu to I fell in love with you the way you talk to me that day and us din mere us bachcho ko khana khilate hue dekhkar tumhare aankho me jo chamak thi usse mujhe pyar hua tumse. The way you appreciate my work that day nobody did till now. And that day when I forget to bring my money bag and you paid my bus fare for me. You will feel weird but that day my love and respect for you grow to such an extent that I can't imagine. You know, kisi ladke ke paas agar paise nah o or ek ladki jab uska payment karti hai toh ladke ka male ego hurt hota hai. But mera kabhi nahi hua. Indeed I fell in love with you more and more. Because you help me out of such an embarrassing situation in front of all."

Till now Jodha was listening his pouring out. But after last few lines she didn't hold her emotion anymore. She threw herself on Jalal. But the moment their body touched she feel like she was hugging a cold ice slab. "I think this is what spirits feel like" she thought. She cried nd cried hiding her face on crook of his neck. Both of his hand gripped her in his spiritual body.

"I love you Jalal. I love you. I love you. I love you..." She was continuously saying like a desperate creature who want him to believe in her words. "I love you madly Jalal. But my love failed to convey myself to you. Isse pehle ki main apne dil ki baat tumse keh paati sab khatam ho chukka tha. Tum jaa chuke the mujhe chodke" she said while crying her heart out.

Those three magical words from her mouth feel the sweetest music to him. Jodha encircle her arms on his both sholdier, and rested her head near his hear but she was unfortunate. There was no such beat she want to hear. The missing of his heart beat once again remember her that he is just a soul, a spirit, a memory which she will cherish her whole life. Jalal rested his waist and another o her back. He closed his eyes to feel their found love in this chilli night under thousands of dazzling stars.

Suddenly someone from the neibour house switch on the radio and the RJ started to blubber. "So here it the song for all those couple who found their newly found love to cherish all though their life. This one for all of you newly couples." The RJ played the song. A bunch of violin started to play along.

Thoda Sa Pyar Hua Hai Thoda Hai Baki

Thoda Sa Pyar Hua Hai Thoda Hai Baki

Hum To Chaahenge Tujhe

Hum To Chaahenge Tujhe

Jab Talak Jaan Hai Baki

Jalal closed his eyes. He was feeling out of the world now. Being his love in his arms, even though he can feel her as a soul but still she is in his arms. She loves him. This very feel make him the king of the world. She clutches his shoulder tightly like if she loosen hold he will go away. Yes the love immensely each other. But now what? He can't come back to her or she can't have him in the life. The fact of never having him in her life make her too insecure.

Pyar Humne Kiya Hai Pyar Tumne Kiya Hai

Yaar Phir Imtihaan Kyon Zamane Ne Liya Hai

Pyar Humne Kiya Hai Pyar Tumne Kiya Hai

Yaar Phir Imtihaan Kyon Zamane Ne Liya Hai

Saath Hum Denge Tera

Saath Hum Denge Tera Tujhse Vaada Hai Saathi

Yes, they are being beside each other when Jalal alive. And now again its proved that they will be with each other after life also. "Hum tumhara humesha sathe denge Jodha. Chahe kuch bhi ho jaye, tumhara jalal tumhara sath dega. Per ek wada karna hoga tumhe mujhse."

Jodha was humming the tune of the song, suddenly look up to him. "What promise?"

"dekho Jodha main yeh bharosa to nahi de sakta ke main humesha tumhare stah rahunga. Kyuki tumto jani ho ke main ab kya hu. Mujhe is duniya se gaye hue zyada din nahi hue hai. Ab jab meri atma ki shanti ke lie puja sampanna hogi. Mujhe jana hoga Jodha..."

"nooo..."she screame like a mad> "no, nahi tum nahi jaoge? Ye kya baat hui, avi to humne apne pyar ka izhaar kia hai, or avi tum mujhe chodke jane ki baat kar rahe ho. Nahi main tumhe jane nahi dungi. Bhalehi tum meri zindagi me shameel nah o sako per main tumhe apne aapse kabhi dur nahi jane dungi. Tum roz mere paas rahoge Jalal. Humesha mere kareeb. Bohot kareeb. Koi alag nahi kar ayega tumhe mujhse."

Jalal could sense her situation. She loves him but can't have him in her life, now after his those words her heart getting restless for his separation. But he can't help this. He is a spirit a soul who is waiting for his time to free form this world and have to go to their own world. But no. he don't want to go. He don't want to go leaving here very far from himself.

"no jalal, don't do this to me. Itne dino ke baad mujhe khushi mili hai. Kal mere papa bhi chale gaye mujhe chodke. Tum me main ek sahara ek chaao dhund rahi thi taaki apne aapko sowup saku. Per aj to tumne mujhse who sahara bhi china chahte ho. Itne din Jalal, itne dino ke baad mujhe mera pyaar wapas mila hai. Main or nahi sah aungi Jalal, tumse duri or nahi she paungi jalal." She helplessly crying on his cold chest gripping her palm tightly his shoulder.

"Don't say like that Jodha. Mujhe jana hi hoga Jodha. Meri zindagi khatam ho chuki hai Jodha. Ab main tumhe paa to nahi sakta bas pyaar kar sakta hu, or asha kar sakta hu ke mera pyaar tumhare dilme humesha zinda rahe, jabki main zinda nahi hu. Promie me Jodha the day my soul puja will done and I will go way, you will move on in your live, marry a very nice chap, and make 10-20 children." He chuckle. Jodha too smile painfully closing her eyes. "but please Jodha, un 9-10 bachco ki ammi ban jae ke baad bhi mujhe bhul mat jana. Ye ek hi request karunga mai, mujhe or mere pyaar ko apne dil me humesha panah dena or yaad karna. Bas yehi ek dua hai Jodha." Tears are falling from his eyes but he want to let it go today. She is in his arms nothing more he can wish.

Dard Jitna Milega Pyar Utna Badhega

Apni Chahat Ka Aaye Yeh Zamana Jhukega

Dard Jitna Milega Pyar Utna Badhega

Apni Chahat Ka Aaye Yeh Zamana Jhukega

Dil Se Dil Mil Hi Gaye Apna Milna Hai Baki

Jodha was thinking. Thinking what to do. After some time she looked to Jalal who was cherishing the moment closing his eyes.

"mujhe ek baat kehni hai jalal."

Jalal opens his eyes and looked towards her. "kya bat hai Jodha, batao?"

"kya hum jitney din saath hai utne din apne punare pyar ke palo ko yaad kare? Mujhe tumhare sath who sare pal firse jeene hai jalal."

Jalal looked at her lovingly knowing what is in her mind. "Why not my dear JO. Anything for you." She chuckled on his reply. "by the way dear, tumhe yaad hai tumhare salgirah k eagle din jab tumhe meri marne ki khabar mili us din raat ko kya hua tha? Kina shock laga tha tumko. Orek sach batao Jodha" he embressed her more tighly in his arms. She dig her head on him more.

"mera debut entry kaisi thi?" he started to laugh.

"itni ghatiya thi ki meri jaan usi din chali jati agar sukanya ne mujhe pichese na pakadti to. God jalal what was that? Why did you scared me so much that day? You spirits are very crual towards hman being.'

"Ha ha ha, Jodha yaad hai usdin CCD me kitne sar uncha karke soukh se bol rahi thi mujhe bhoot pishach ya aatmaao se darr nahi lagta.' To maine bhi soch achalo meri Jhansi ki rani o thoda daraya jay. To daraya mine...he he he..." jalal started to laugh more loudly seeing a big frowny face of Jodha.

The day after Jodha's Birthday

She was standing in the balcony watching the stars. She was feeling like torn by the fate. The person she loved with all of herself just snatched by destiny even before speak out the feelings to him.

The news of the death of Jalal blows away her life.. Even though they were meeting in between other friends Abdul and Moti. But still her complicated heart find a right solution in Jalal.

She began to feel life in different vision. She started to love him. Jalal's simplicity his positive view towards life and his jolliness wins her heart and make her fall in love with him such deep that she didn't know that she could have love someone other than her family with such extent and passion. But now after his death she feels that her heart will stop and she will die. And fortunately she only wants that. She cant live without her presence anymore.

"kyu? Kyu kia aapne ais allah! Jalal to aapko bohotmaanta than na? per jo aap pe vishwas karta hai kya aap usko aise hi saza dete ho? Itni dardnaak or itni badi saza? Kya gunah kia ha usne? Kuch nahi.phir bhi use maar dala. Use mujhse milane se pehle hi mujhse alag kar dia? Kyu? Kyu?" she cried placing her head on the back wall of the balcony.

Suddenly her ears got alert. What was that? She try to hear. A very slow and very shriek sound. Like someone blowing whistle. Looks like the sound was coming from far away. But she can understand the sound was coming from nearby, in fact if she is right its coming from their garden itself.

The realisation make her look toward the garden. But she found nothing. She was looking there for some time but she failed to find anything.

But the moment she was about to turn towards her room, she hear it again. But this time she can feel some kind of relation to that whistle. A very familiar about it. She try hard to think which kind of relation she had with a mere whistle. Suddenly like a thunder she remember the connection. She curse herself. How can she forget that? Jalal used to whistle like that whenever he was happy or in joy. She turn around. The whistle sound is getting louder, like the owner of the whistle is coming near. She was looking for it, just then she saw a black shadow was walking in their garden. No it's not pacing around. But it's going towards their backward of the house. She took a dupatta around her neck and ran toward the backward.

But alas! She again find only a deep black darkness around her, nothing else. The backward was dirty and dump with lots of throw out things. Aluminium trunk, garbage, old torn cloths etc. but she find no black shadow or no human being there.

A sound or dry leaves catch her attention. She turn around and freeze. Oh My God!!! There the shadow. But now it's looking scary. She saw there was a pair of bright yellow eyes just I the difference of 10 feet. Standing and probably watching her all action. She was numb. Her all organs stop there work after watching the scene. Her legs got heavy, She can't stand.

The eyes are like cat eyes, but the purples are delighted looking at her. For a moment she saw she was watching a cat, but soon she realise that the pair of eyes were on about 5'8" above. Yes! It's a man. A man she saw yesterday on the rooftop wishing her happy birthday.

She blinked her eyes and saw there was no one. She return to her house. But the moment she enter he house again she saw the shadow. Now waking again towards rooftop. She also followed.

The moment she entered the roof, again she saw nothing. But the moment she look towards the open area of the roof she saw the shadow was standing there facing back towards her. She now feeling curious. An unknown curiosity working on her to know who the person was. She took small steps towards there.

The shadow might be feel her present near him, so he turn half his head on shoulder. And waiting for her first move. Jodha walk near him and speak out on low shaking voice as she was fearing for the worse.

"Who are you? What you want?"

The shadow turn around. She first saw the bright burning yellow eyes of him. Her full concentration was on his eyes only so first she didn't notice his face. But looks like the nature itself wants her to saw his fac. The bright moon light helps her to see the face. And the moment she saw him her face gone white as sheet. The glowing eyes now glowing in the dark with the moon light. She saw the face which she want to see for her whole life. The eyes which she want to drown. The person she want to love and be loved in her all life time.

Her heart started to beat faster when she hear the peson saying her name, and it echoing in the air of this beautiful night.

"jodhaaa..."

Before the voice disappear in the air. She in on her knees crying. Yes he came back. Came back even after his death.

"Jalal..." this is only she can say then.