Hey, all. So, here comes the next chapter. And it's no exaggeration, but I'm insanely, terribly madly afraid about this chapter.(fingers crossed). :D And Merry Christmas to all. Enjoy! Chapter 42
Dreams. Dreams, as they say, are not real. They are not real because they do not exist within the confinements of our three dimensional reality; and barely have anything to do with the fourth one called Time. How true this was Ranveer could never tell, for ever since he came to understand life and its meaning in the context of reality, he had found himself struggling with this fact only. Ishani Parekh was his dream, an unattainable one. Was this dream a fallacy meant to torment him in his sleep as well as in wake? He never had an answer. But he had known how it felt to see those eyes lacking the same love he had in his ever since the realization of his existence. Yet he never denied his love was simply...Love. He did not desire her, or possessed any element that could usurp the purity of his love. He never understood if it was such a thing, but he always took pride in his feelings whenever his thoughts halted at her mention that his love was not about desire or desperation but something he could never explain to anyone. He loved her. He truly did. Just like a child loving the silvery precious object placed in the dark sky every night, moon. She was his moon. He loved her and whenever his own heart cried in the agony of the truth of his misfortune, Ranveer would make himself understand, somehow, who he was and who she was. They were never meant to be.
His pride never elevated to being the cause of his vanity but it remained there, curled within his heart, in all those changeless years that only had their colors' changed but everything else in their spirit was same: lifeless. Lifeless because she wasn't by his side and he knew she could never be. Ranveer found it intensely strange today how his heart began to flutter as Ishani's eyes fell upon him in the party, and how a glint of the dulcet love was so visible in her eyes, as if the brightest star sparkling amidst the darkest of the clouds. It was not that he was making up the stories in his heart to comfort it, but a part of him certainly knew what his mind could never come to believe. Perhaps it was foolishness, and absurdity to keep calculating these feelings and the anticipation of their reciprocation, but he could not bring himself to be completely ignorant either. It felt more absurd.
Ranveer stared out at the window, its curtains faintly stirring with the breeze passing in. The night grew serene with the caf getting closed and the murmurs of the costumers fading away; the hooting of the birds had silenced in a while in the woods, though few still spoke in distance. It did not feel cold anymore. Ishani had slowly settled herself by Ranveer's side on the couch they sat, and he, to her comfort and surprise, did not push her away or say anything to upset her. Ranveer on the other hand rather hesitantly wrapped his arm around her, as her head gently fell on his shoulder. He could see she was tired as she lightly opened her eyes for a moment before giving in to the peaceful slumber that awaited her. He caressed the back of her head just like he did before when they were friends and she needed him by her side. It hurt to know he was the reason of her pain recently. Nothing could be more painful than being the cause of her tears.
Ranveer sighed as he leaned his back on the sofa, cautious enough not to wake her up while Ishani by now was leaning on his chest deeply, her arms around his own, curled, and her hair, that he hadn't realized, fastened in a ponytail falling down on her shoulder covering his view to her face. He tried turning his gaze away from her face but every breath of hers falling on him, tingling his skin under his white shirt made it harder for him every moment. He carefully pushed aside the hair locks that fell on her face while she continued to sleep quietly, as if unaware of turmoil of the world around her. He didn't blame her and when he himself fell asleep he did not know.
*
The dawn broke with the first rays of the sun escaping its horizon and spreading the morning colors all across dark, crimson the sky. Ishani stirred slowly to turn over when she found herself on the edge of her bed which made her pause for a few moments before her eyes fell on Ranveer, asleep next to her, her own arms around his and her head resting on his chest. For a moment she felt like giving a loud shriek but words melted in her throat as she saw him. Really saw him. Unlike all the times before he seemed to have slept peacefully (or so she thought), and no worry occupied his features. In a couple of moments the memories of the last evening rushed back in her head that made her blush slightly. She gently pulled out her arms and stood up, her feet touching the cold floor quietly. Ishani glanced at the watch on the table beside her which struck 6.30 in the morning.
It wasn't long she was up when she heard a sound and after turning back saw Ranveer rubbing his eyes and yawning. His eyes fell on her as he looked at her wide eyed until the reality dawned upon him. He sprung onto his feet suddenly, as if shocked by something hard.
"Ishani, I'm sorry," he said, guiltily. "I...I didn't mean to...you were asleep and I didn't mean to..."
Ishani couldn't help but let out a tiny laugh at the way he spoke.
"We slept together," Ishani said, her voice emotionless.
"I know I should have left, Ishani, but...don't say that. I mean we did not sleep really. It was just I took a nap right before you woke up. And I'm really sorry. It shouldn't have happened..."
Ranveer did not say anything further and chose to look at the floor. Ishani herself had no idea what to say or do except looking sideways and hoping for the silence to end by any magic. At the moment her heart felt various emotions beginning from joy to guilt, sadness and an aching anticipation but none in any harmony.
"I'll prepare breakfast," she said ultimately.
"You don't have the workers?"
"I don't need any." Ishani shrugged her shoulders and left.
They both knew something had changed this morning between them. Ever since they met each other in London, their days had been unexpected and brought various surprises without any realization until they occurred. Their new friendship was one of them and so was Ishani's professional life which she credited to Ranveer only, though never confessed that to him. Ranveer on the other hand had never felt so strange before. What he thought at the moment was guilt, and hope, which itself followed guilt in return. She belonged to someone else and not him. Somewhere, he felt, his pride had been assaulted the moment he fell asleep by her side like that. It shouldn't have happened. Ishani did not say anything. She was emotionless and her silence tormented him more.
She had said she would prepare breakfast and leaving her place in that moment did not seem right. He tried to say something, apology and that how sorry he was, but her silence stung him terribly and he relapsed back to feeling guilty without saying anything else.
It must have been nearly an hour when Ishani entered the room with two trays of sandwiches and two cups of coffee.
"You...?" Ranveer began but was cut short by Ishani.
"Yes, I made that, and that is what I know to prepare in such a short notice," she said.
"Short notice?" Ranveer could not keep laughter from his tone.
"Yes, you know." Ishani shrugged her shoulders.
"Atleast you have learned to make this. This is the best news for the day," Ranveer said airily.
"You don't mean that, do you?"
"Mean what?"
"You were mocking me for not being able to cook, weren't you?"
"Trust a woman with her ego," Ranveer whispered to himself, while Ishani noticed him muttering the words.
"What did you just say? That is my ego? C'mon, Ranveer. You should thank me right now."
"You took one whole hour to make this?" Ranveer picked up a burned piece of the sandwich which he began to eat afterwards.
"So what?" Ishani fumbled. "It's so hard!"
"You are impossible." Ranveer shook his head. "Come on, Ishani. You are not a kid anymore. I don't know how you manage all the time! That's why you've lost your weight, I tell you. You look so thin now. You should hire a cook for you."
"Of course not," Ishani snapped back. "I know how to take care of myself on my own."
"Very much," Ranveer laughed. "I can see that already. Is it how you start your morning?"
"No." Ishani smiled. "I get ready and visit the caf and see how is it going and then do something else. It's my life, the caf, I mean."
"I'm proud of you."
Ishani frowned at Ranveer thinking he might have said this sarcastically but he did not, for he did not say anything more.
"And I know better things to cook, too. It's just..." Ishani said.
"Good for you," Ranveer said; "but it's better you give up on your stubbornness and take care of yourself. You know, Falguni Maa shouldn't be unhappy."
"You're not mad at her, are you? After all that happened?" Ishani said, while Ranveer finished his breakfast.
"I don't know," he said. "Probably yes, probably no."
"Why, no'?"
"I don't know. Perhaps any mother would have done the same...what she did. No one would ever place their servants above their family, their blood. It's natural."
"But it's wrong," Ishani whispered, blankly.
"Sorry, what?"
But before Ishani could answer anything Ranveer's phone rang, breaking their conversation.
"Hello," he said.
Ishani could not hear who was on the other side of the phone but Ranveer's expressions did not vary.
"When?" said Ranveer, his tone quieter than usual.
"What is it, Ranveer?"
Ranveer disconnected the call and looked at Ishani, though his expressions could not be read right now.
"Tell me everything is fine, Ranveer."
Ranveer shook his head, coughing lightly.
"Are you alright?" Ishani ran to him, rubbing his back.
"Mr. Zaveri... Mr. Zaveri died. Last night in his cell, they said," Ranveer managed to say. "We need to go before it's late."
Ishani for a moment lost her senses, and was brought back by Ranveer asking her to hurry as Mr. Zaveri's family might arrive or might have arrived already to retrieve his body.
*
Ishani and Ranveer, in the next two hours, reached the Wandsworth prison, hurrying as much as possible, battling the traffic somehow which made them delay more than needed and expected.
"Mr. Zaveri," Ishani said breathlessly, as she and Ranveer reached near the cell to find the place already empty and two cops examining the little room carefully. "Where is Mr. Zaveri?" she asked again.
"He has been taken from here, Ma'am," one of the cops said, coming towards her. "His daughter one hour ago took his body and they're heading to the US now."
Ishani gulped. "Where are they right now?"
"To the Heathrow Airport," the cop answered. "They might not have reached there, and you can catch them if you leave without any further delay."
"And what exactly had happened to him?" Ranveer asked, his voice still exhibiting no emotion. "I saw him last week and he was fine."
"Heart failure," the cop answered. "He was a patient of diabetes already which made him vulnerable to the disease and ended up costing him his life."
"We should leave now. Thank you, officer," Ishani said, when Ranveer said nothing in answer to the police officer.
"We can see them yet," Ranveer said. "Don't worry."
"I've informed Maa. Sharman bhaiya and Manas are going to their residence in United States," Ishani said, while Ranveer only answered with a nod.
In the next one hour Ishani and Ranveer reached the airport and right at the terminal Ishani's eyes fell on a young woman in her late 20s. With her stood 4 policemen, two guards, and an another man she did not know, but seemed to be the relative of Mr. Zaveri, for just like his daughter the man too looked dejected. Ishani gestured Ranveer who understood Mr. Zaveri's body was in kept in a large wooden box ready to be taken inside. Ranveer and Ishani walked upto them, and Mr. Zaveri's daughter immediately recognized Ishani as her pain-stricken eyes were filled with guilt.
"No, no," Ishani said, sympathetically, understanding the cause of her guilt and holding her hands in her own. "Don't."
"My father, Ishani," she said, and burst into uncontrollable tears. "I'm sorry."
The man rushed to her and took her in his arms. Ishani understood he was her husband.
"Shh," he said, slowly. "I'm sorry, Ms. Parekh, but she has been worried ever since the incidents happened the last month. And, I'm Shravan Mehta, her husband. She is not in the condition to talk anything, you can see that yourself."
Ishani nodded, as her eyes followed what Mr. Zaveri's daughter continued to stare at: at her father's coffin. Ishani's heart broke as their last first and last encounter's memories headed back to her, but somehow she kept quiet.
"Mrs. Mehta," Ranveer spoke for the first time, distracting Ishani from her thoughts, "I know it's not the right time to say anything, but you know it's better to let go of the past and you should not carry the weight of the unpleasant things that happened. That wasn't your fault. Your father would never have blamed you for anything."
Mrs. Mehta nodded, wiping her tears, though she could not say anything.
Ishani and Ranveer continued to console Mr. Zaveri's family when one of the guards returned (who left after Ishani and Ranveer had arrived), and whispered something to Shravan.
"It's time. We're to leave. Ishani, I hope my father did something good to you and RV when he played his games." Mrs. Mehta said, looking at Ishani guiltily.
She did not look at Ranveer while mentioning the name of RV suggested she had not guessed him to be RV at all, or perhaps thought he detested the old man enough not to witness his final departure, Ishani thought.
"I need to go, Ishani. Take care of yourself and please apologize to RV as well on my behalf. Perhaps we will see him one day."
"Good bye," Ishani whispered, holding Ranveer's hand in hers while the coffin of Mr. Zaveri taken away, and the rest of them along with his family disappeared finally.
Ranveer sighed and turned to look at Ishani whose eyes were filled with tears.
"Ishani," he said, softly squeezing her hand in his, "let's go."
She could have expected him to say something more but he had become so distant once again that until she looked at him it felt he wasn't there at all. He was mad at Mr. Zaveri, or perhaps not, but he had not expressed anything ever since the news broke to them.
"Are you alright?" she asked, as they walked past the vehicles to Ranveer's car. Ranveer nodded. "Why don't you say anything? You're not mad him now, are you?"
Ranveer shook his head. "I'm not."
"Is there anything wrong?" Ishani asked, as the driver began driving.
"Everything," he answered. "The two people I respected so much...left me. Mota Babuji and Mr. Zaveri."
"But Papa would always be here, in your hear."
"He is there all the time, but sometimes it's not easy to let things go. Love, betrayal, loneliness, heartbreaks everything exists and comes simultaneously and becomes overwhelming. It's happening today." He finished looking into her eyes.
"And you know how to cope with it," Ishani said, guiltily. "Don't give up now. At the end of the day you hold no grudge against Zaveri uncle. I'm glad to see that."
"Thank you," Ranveer said. "I miss him."
"So do I," Ishani said. "But he never had the same feelings like we did for him."
"That hurts. When you love someone and they never return the affection, it hurts."
Ranveer did not meet his eyes with hers and Ishani, too, feeling strangely guilty looked out of the window. Time had passed rapidly since morning and now neither Ishani nor Ranveer desired to indulge in anything professional for a while. Ishani requested she wanted to go home and do nothing for a while to which Ranveer quietly agreed.
"I'll drop you home, then," he said.
"Thank you. But what about the meetings that you were talking about few days back?"
"I'll handle them," Ranveer said, "They're not very important."
"I don't want to be alone," Ishani said. "Would you be with me? Only for a short while, please?"
Ranveer nodded as they headed towards her home. "Thank you," she said.
"What for?"
"I don't know how I would have handled things today had it not been for you."
"But I didn't do anything," Ranveer said, confused.
"That's it!" Ishani snapped. "That's how it always was."
Ranveer looked confused but Ishani smiled slightly. She didn't say anything else. She couldn't say anything. Probably she needed to solve the disheveled mysteries of her own heart first.
Cricket
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Hindi TV Shows
Kumkum Bhagya
