Drabbles ~ From RaGaLand - Page 4

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RM14 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#31
Loved it ..the way you describe it.😳
longtime thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#32
Nice work .. But too short.. Waiting for more.. It will be amazing to read Ranaji's pov in this whole affair ..
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Posted: 9 years ago
#33

Originally posted by: longtime

Nice work .. But too short.. Waiting for more.. It will be amazing to read Ranaji's pov in this whole affair ..


Thank you. The idea is to keep it short as the focus is on the thoughts of Ranaji. Next up is Gayatri. More from Ranaji to follow soon.
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Posted: 9 years ago
#34
While I had initially promised to write the shooting scene from Gayatri's perspective too, I wasn't very keen on doing it - for various reasons. However, after the request from .SSS. (Sapna), I had a change of heart and decided to give it a shot. Here's the result. It has gone over the 500 word limit that I'd set upon myself, but well - do let me know what you think.

~ Mesmerized ~

"Rani Gayatri, do you think this is funny?"

As everything else that Rana Indravadhan did, his command over the English language was also plain perfect, to the extent that he even managed to sound better than the English - a feat that didn't fail to impress me. But then, this was Rana Indravadhan, a perfectionist from all that I had heard about him prior to our marriage. The words were uttered as a challenge and caught me off guard. I tried to come up with a justification for my amusement but my tongue chose that moment to desert me, as it always did when Ranaji and me were together, alone. He thought I was laughing at his shooting skills, or lack thereof, apparently. But I didn't need to see him shooting to know that he was a crack shot. However, before I could even make an attempt to explain, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to where to he stood.

"Aapko lagta hai aap behtar nishana laga sakti hai? Toh laga ke dikhaiyye."

The challenge was smoothly issued but it sent my heart racing.

"Nishana? Kaise? Main toh apni gulail maiyke me chod aayi hoon."

As soon as the words left my mouth, I mentally kicked myself. Whoever compared a rifle and a slingshot?! His amused expression indicated that he took it as a tongue-in-cheek comment.

"Toh isse lagiye."

He pushed the rifle towards me. I took a step back, my eyes pleading him to let me go. But he dumped the rifle in my hands and I broke into a cold sweat. The rifle almost slipped out of my hands but before I could stumble, his arms came around me, steadying me and the rifle in my hands. With an exasperated look, he helped me balance the rifle and take aim. However, my gaze found his face and I found it riveted there, drinking in his masculine beauty. His fingers found my chin and directed my face towards the target, and I was sure my face was stained pink. I realized I could get used to this if Rana Indravadhan Singh Deo was teaching me shoot. Who would have thought that learning to shoot could be so romantic! The combination of his proximity and the apprehension of shooting the rifle, left me on edge, the blush on my face barely contained. Before I knew it, my fingers were caged under his, locked on the trigger.

"Nishana lagaiyye, Rani Gayatri."

My heart was thudding wildly.

"Nishana saamne hai."

My eyes were struggling to focus on the target, his presence beside me a constant distraction.

"Shoot, Rani Gayatri."

The command was issued with all the authority of a Royal and I found myself cringing in anticipation of the shot.

"Shoot!"

The shot rang out and I recoiled, and before I knew it, I had turned around and buried my head in his chest, my eyes shut tight, my hands clinging to his T-shirt. For a moment, there was complete silence, except for the sound of our asynchronous heartbeats. As I recovered, I suddenly pulled back and he deftly extricated his arms from around me. Still reeling from the intimacy of the moment, his words shook me from the trance.

"Jis kaam ko karte hue khudke haath kaanpte ho, us kaam me dusron ka mazaak nahi udaya karte, Rani Gayatri."

Coming out of dreamland, I cursed inwardly as I realized that this was no romantic rendezvous. This was about proving who was a better shot - to him.

As if on cue, he picked up the rifle and resumed shooting, his shots ringing out in succession as each bottle was reduced to shards. My attempt at an explanation was lost in the chaos and I closed my ears till he finished. And even after that, there was no room for an explanation. With a parting shot about Royals playing with bullets and not slingshots, he was gone.

Oh, but I had never meant to mock his shooting skills. Dear God! The man had quite a way of jumping to conclusions. But then, could I really blame him if he didn't find anything amusing about the soldier's moustache? I grinned as my eyes fell on the said soldier's moustache again. Well, well, my royal husband seemed to have a temper and I needed to find a way to soothe it. His rebuke played through my mind and I couldn't help but smile. Ever the chivalrous gentleman, he had such a cute way of reprimanding, his tone oozing politeness. I hit my palm across my forehead as I realized how silly that would sound to someone were I to voice it aloud. The way I seemed to make allowances for Rana Indravadhan Singh Deo meant only one thing.

Rani Gayatri Devi, you are hopelessly in love with your dear husband.

Edited by -Sarcy- - 9 years ago
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Posted: 9 years ago
#35
First of all, thank you so much for considering my request and writing in Gayathri's POV too.This is one of my favorite scenes of the show. And you've beautifully portrayed them.

"Shoot, Rani Gayathri" this dialogue,..I still can feel how it was ringing in my ears. The intensity with which he uttered it...👍🏼 I Loved it how you captured the effect of this dialogue on Gayathri, very well with your words.

Coming out of dreamland, I cursed inwardly as I realized that this was no romantic rendezvous. This was about proving who was a better shot to him.

^^
This is what I was always hoping to see in Gayathri. She to take the cue of his acions and to come into reality from her dreamland.


Rani Gayatri Devi, you are hopelessly in love with your dear husband.,
^^
So true, but I'm being all hopeful for their love ...❤️

Very well written👏
Edited by .SSSS. - 9 years ago
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Posted: 9 years ago
#36
Loved reading Gayatri's perspective how she felt while Rana taught her ... her monologue was adorable
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Posted: 9 years ago
#37
B'ful,loved it so much..its awesome.⭐️
Sarcy thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#38

Originally posted by: .SSS.

First of all, thank you so much for considering my request and writing in Gayathri's POV too.This is one of my favorite scenes of the show. And you've beautifully portrayed them.

"Shoot, Rani Gayathri" this dialogue,..I still can feel how it was ringing in my ears. The intensity with which he uttered it...👍🏼 I Loved it how you captured the effect of this dialogue on Gayathri, very well with your words.

Coming out of dreamland, I cursed inwardly as I realized that this was no romantic rendezvous. This was about proving who was a better shot to him.

^^
This is what I was always hoping to see in Gayathri. She to take the cue of his acions and to come into reality from her dreamland.


Rani Gayatri Devi, you are hopelessly in love with your dear husband.,
^^
So true, but I'm being all hopeful for their love ...❤️

Very well written👏


You're welcome, and I'm glad you liked it. :)
Sid and DD carried out this scene very beautifully and the dialogue delivery was spot on. Typically, in this format, I wouldn't include so many dialogues as my main focus is on their thoughts but while writing this piece from Gayatri's perspective, I saw the scope to explore her thoughts after each of those dialogues.

And yes, as to Gayatri coming out of dreamland, I thought that even if she doesn't know the 'truth' of her relationship to Rana Indravadhan, she should be making something of his actions, at least some times if not every time, and not just keep mooning over him all the time. So that had to be there! 😉
Edited by -Sarcy- - 9 years ago
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Posted: 9 years ago
#39
Woww loved the way u have expressed Gayatri's feelings in words.
Ur words made the scene alive again
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Posted: 9 years ago
#40
Wow wow wow! Totally loving this series of drabbles you have begun! You are such an amazing writer! I haven't seen this serial yet but your amazing monologues are compelling me to watch. Please do continue soon! And PM me if you can 😉
Edited by arnavkidevani - 9 years ago

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