Arshi FF - Sealed With Your Kiss/Chapter 17/ (Pg-143)/UPDATED - Page 48

Chapter 8

Crack In The Iceberg

In times of trouble and insanity

I carry masks to disguise
the pain I carry
secure behind my eyes

I can never let out again
the misery I hide
to hell with my dignity
to hell with my pride

from this day forward
and for ever more

I will mount this mask
that will be my lore

No reaching out when I am weak
no solace will I seek

when you look for answers
when you say your prayers
all you will see is masks
and no pain that I bare

~ Some are born to sweet delight ~ Some are born to endless night ~

~ Some people are afraid of what they might find ~ if they try to analyze themselves too much ~

A man screamed in pain, a woman pleaded to leave them alone but the monsters didn't show them any mercy...

One of them, the biggest one opened his huge mouth showing his jagged and blood stained teeth, the remains of a carcass dripping from his mouth. The smell of blood was so pungent and rusty that he could feel it seeping through his lungs like poison and permeating through his soul...

"Don't hurt them please", he sobbed, coming between the monsters and the two people, waving his hands in the air to ward them off. His throat was constricted with fear and he felt as if someone was squeezing his heart in a fist.

He tried to stop them from coming towards the man and woman, raising his hands in defense to save them from the monsters, but the bigger one of them took hold of his arms and tore them off his body. He screamed but no voice came out, only a painful gurgle managed to escape through his constricted throat. His breath dying an agonized death into the chamber of his lungs...

Have mercy, he wanted to give voice to the beseeching cry that was rising inside his throat but had no breath left to plead. The bigger one had already grabbed the man and was tearing great chunks out of his body through his jagged teeth, while the other monsters had started tearing off the woman's body parts...

He raised his bleeding stumps trying to stop them but at that instant the scene dimmed then blurred right before his eyes and he was falling into a dark tunnel, which had no exit...

The last scene that he saw before he fell into the tunnel had been of a man and woman lying butchered on the ground, while at a little distance from them a young girl was lying in a bloody heap on the ground, her haunted eyes were wide open and she was staring transfixed at the sky...

Arnav woke up with a start, his heart thumping so madly as if to break out of his ribs and his whole body shuddered in shock while his unuttered screams rang inside his memories. Sweat was pouring out from each pore of his body in reaction to his horrific nightmare and even the bed covers around him had gotten damp from his perspiration.

He heaved himself off the bed feeling weak like a kitten, while nausea churned inside his stomach. His breath was wheezing in his throat like an old man's and when he lifted a trembling hand to touch his forehead it felt cold and clammy. His night clothes were stuck up to his body and he was unable to breathe normally. With trembling fingers he drew back the drawer of the side table to take out the inhaler.

Pressing the plunger on the inhaler he drew long breaths, receiving the much needed puffs of oxygen from inside the bottle. After taking many long breaths, his breathing and heart rate returned to normal. Rubbing a hand across his face to wipe out the perspiration, he threw back the inhaler inside the drawer with a weary hand...

Closing the drawer with a snap, that echoed in the silence of the room he lifted the water jug from the table and poured himself a glass of water. Raising the glass to his parched lips he drank the whole contents in one go...

While placing the glass back on the side table, his hand shook so badly that the glass slipped through his fingers to land with a crash on the floor, shattering into a million pieces. Cursing himself mentally for being so weak and clumsy he got down on his knees and began picking up the glass pieces. One little shard managed to prick his index finger and a tiny droplet of blood formed on its pore.

The rusty smell of blood wafted inside his nose, and he felt light headed as the fresh memory of his nightmare intruded inside his mind. The vision of the butchered man, woman and girl flashed before his eyes and a sick dreadful feeling rouse inside him while a thick poisonous bile of trauma constricted his throat almost choking him to death...

His stomach heaved and he almost ran towards the bathroom. Falling on his knees near the commode he emptied all the contents of his stomach inside it, retching again and again until his eyes watered and he had not even a single trace of the night's dinner left inside him...

Having nothing left to lose, he collapsed on the bathroom floor, laying his cheek on the cold floor and drawing his knees back towards his chest in a fetal position...

Gupta Residence: (Morning)

"Khushi Beta what had happened to you, are you alright?" Garima was asking her in a worried voice from behind the door, a tray laden with food held in her hands. "Open the door Khushi did anything happened to you in Angie's Birthday party?"She asked again a little impatiently this time. She was a mother after all, and when Khushi had came back home dazed and walking like a zombie with her eyes swollen from crying and her lips looking chapped and bruised, her heart had sunk to the floor with her sixth sense warning her that something bad had happened to her daughter...

But to Garima's exasperation khushi had refused to open her mouth and had headed at once towards her room, locking herself inside it. It pained her greatly that her spoiled yet chirping daughter had fallen silent at once. And on top of that the thing that worried her most was that Khusi wasn't facing anyone lately, not even her father. She was refusing to face her parents on the dining table and was spending her days while remaining locked inside her room.

To her chagrin whenever she had sent a food tray to Khushi's room it had been brought back untouched by the maid, who would be almost in tears because Khushi would have shouted at her rudely to leave her alone. Distressed with her daughter's growing silence and worried about her health she herself had decided to come to her room with a food tray. "I won't ask anything, but please beta eat something or you'll fall sick", she tapped her fingers on the door in desperation.

"Mom please go away, I want to be alone", Khushi's heavy voice drifted from behind the door and that distressed Garima more than her daughter's silence. There was definitely something wrong with Khushi, but what? Garima had no idea whatsoever. She had already inquired from Angie about Khushi to which Angie had replied that the they themselves were quite bewildered with Khushi's behavior as she had been silent the whole time during the birthday party and then after the party she had gone to the bathroom for quite long a time...

Angie had been about to get up inorder to check on Khushi when she had came almost running out of the bathroom. Her face had been swollen from crying, the saree's pallu had been wrapped tightly around her and she was shaking with nerves. When one of the girl's had asked her about the matter Khushi had snapped rudely at her, causing a minor ruckus in the restaurant to turn people's heads in their direction and leaving the other girl red-faced with embarrassment...

Now Garima was sure that something had happened to Khushi in the bathroom, she had waited for two days to ask from her but now her patience was giving away and she had decided enough was enough. So she had taken the tray from the butler's hand and was now knocking on her daughter's door. But Khushi was still not opening the door. But Garima had already decided that she was going to ask her finally what was the matter with her? and if Khushi won't tell her anything, then she would drag it out of her by whatever means that were at her disposal...

"Khushi do you want me to call your father?", Garima's last resort at a threat worked and after a moment's silence Khushi opened the lock on her door.

"Nothing important happened mom", she addressed her mother in a subdued voice. She was still dressed in her night clothes, her hair were falling out of a messy pony tail and dark shadows circles were adorning her tired eyes. It looked to Garima as if she hadn't slept a wink during these two days. "Tell that your disheveled state", Garima waved a hand to indicate Khushi's clothes and hair.

"Mom I told you na nothing important happened", Khushi heaved a deep sigh and sat on the bed with a thud. "khushi tell me properly what happened to you in the bathroom?", Garima's probing gaze was making her flustered and for the first time in life she was feeling out of her depths. That hypocrite Angie, she will see to her later, Khushi thought with clenched teeth.

But first she had to satisfy her mother's curiosity. "Josh rang me in the bathroom and we had a minor tiff, nothing more", Khushi pinched at the bridge of her nose. "Oh not again Khushi how many times do you have to cheat on the poor boy", heaving a sigh of relief at the mention of her fight with her boyfriend, her mother sat nearby her on the bed.

It was customary with her daughter to have a fight with her boyfriend once or twice a week. Garima had seen Josh and had found him to be a shy almost nerdy boy who had always tolerated Khushi's irascible behavior, the only thing he couldn't tolerate was when Khushi flirted with the other boys of her class. Her reckless teasing behavior had sparked up many a fights between them with Khushi always ending up in tears and a poor harassed Josh apologizing to her. "I never cheated on him mother", she protested.

"You should have left him a long time ago Khushi, he was never meant for your spirited attitude, he is too geeky, too shy and too jealous", she threw an exasperated hand in the air to emphasize her point. "Mom atleast he is the safest option", she fell back on the bed covers, her legs dangling from side of the bed. "Khushi you never know when a man who looks to be quite gentle and normal would turn out a complete psycho and these silent types are the most suspicious", her mother leaned on one elbow near her.

A vision of Arnav with devilry in his probing eyes and smirking mouth flashed across her mind and groaning she dragged her Winnie pooh from the bed and hid her face in its soft fur. "Hey Khushi I am talking to you, child you should stop being unfaithful to Josh by flirting with other guys or you could do another thing, leave Josh altogether, it's not right to play with a man's feelings, you could end up in trouble dear", her annoyed mother tugged the Winnie pooh from her arms. Khushi swallowed nervously how she should tell her mother that she had done the same and had already ended up in big trouble.

"Khushi how did you bruise your mouth I never asked?", she came out from her memories with a start to see her mother looking at her with narrowed eyes. "Oh that", she touched her lips unconsciously. A flashback of her locked in the stranger's embrace and kissing him relentlessly danced in her mind's eye. Thank God it was winter otherwise all of her bruises would have been revealed. Although she had hidden all of her bruises beneath a thick layer of clothes she had been unable to hide her swollen lips.

"Mom I got so disheartened with Josh yelling my head off on the phone that I didn't notice the puddle on the bathroom floor and so I slipped on it and bust my mouth on the corner of the counter", she lied shamelessly without batting an eyelash. "Really", her mother said, the suspicion was fast evaporating from her voice and eyes.

"Yeah really mom why would I lie you know how bad our fights are", she groaned, rolling her eyes to add effect to her drama."Maybe I got up from the wrong side of bed that day", she gave a sheepish smile. Garima still wasn't convinced with her daughter's act. Something suspicious and strange was nagging at her mind and her sixth sense was warning her about a certain kind of danger lurking around her daughter.

But she didn't want to pursue the matter further too, lest her daughter would get into a bad mood and would refuse to eat again. So instead she told khushi to apologize to Josh and freshen up to get ready for the college. Khushi agreed, she also wanted to forget that ill-mannered man too and that would be possible only if she would go back to her daily routine...

Planting a kiss on her daughter's cheek Garima left the room never noticing the dark shadow of fear that crossed her daughter's face. Khushi was left wondering about the lie she had spoken to her mother. For once she had wanted to tell her mother about Arnav but she knew that it would cost her, her freedom and she couldn't afford to be locked inside her room with the fear that someday he would approach her again. But she couldn't help the tiny shiver that went across her frame when she thought about his kiss and his masculine hands caressing her body through her clothes.

No one had made her feel like that, not even Josh. But how Josh could have made her feel like she was burning in the fiery pits of hell, when she had never given him any liberties beyond a gentle kiss or an almost innocent touch...

Although Khushi was not a virgin, she had lost her innocence in the back of a car with her second boyfriend when she was 16 years old. It had altogether not been a pleasurable experience for her but it also hadn't been bad too. They had been experimenting with kissing and touching when Aditya had lost control and they both had ended up making in the backseat of the car with him slumping over her right after his orgasm had hit him, while she had been left frustrated and searching for the spark that she had thought was just in her grasp before it vanished leaving her feeling strange and empty.

But she had thanked her lucky stars that she was taking the pill at that time to regulate her periods otherwise she may have ended up pregnant. After having sex she had been so angry and embarrassed that she had lashed out at an equally embarrassed Aditya who had at once started to scrabble back into his clothes. There was no passion, no love that existed in the world, the books had greatly lied to her, she had thought at that time while mentally berating herself.

Although her experience with Aditya had turned her off from ever having sex again it hadn't stopped her from relieving her frustration by taking digs at men and arousing them to a point where she would douse their ardor by acting spiteful and nasty, just like hers had been by Aditya. Men were like alley cats and she hadn't missed any chance to let it be known to them while she toyed with them to her heart's content. But she had always been cautious as to never wander inside a man's territory, preferring shy nerdy boys over them to keep beside her.

Her boyfriend's were always chosen carefully by her for their almost shy and geeky behavior. She had always steered clear of arrogant men who thought too highly of themselves, as she knew the danger of involving herself with one.

Although she had flirted with married and unmarried men alike but she had never established any friendship with them, had never felt the need to approach them herself like she had done with the Mafioso stranger. She still had no idea what had made her cross swords with him. It was like he had goaded her with his expressionless eyes to approach him and make a chink in his cold armor. Never having the tiniest idea that she would feel the spark inside her that that she had been searching recklessly for 4 years among her boyfriends.

He had made her break her own rules and she who had sworn to never step inside deep waters by provoking an older man and approaching him herself was now paying its price. But what a sick price that her masochistic body wanted to pay again and again until she would perish in the heat generated by his predatory arms...

The man who had turned down her defences, whom she hated with an utmost desperation, her body had loved the most...

"Sleep my little baby, hush my little baby", a whispered breath touched his brow, a soft touch trailed across his cheekbones and someone gently kissed his forehead. "Mother", a deep yearning sob rose inside his throat and his eyes snapped open to be instantly hit by the sun rays filtering through the glass windows of his bedroom. Wincing he shut them again, turning on his side to avoid from being hit by them yet again.

"Who the hell opened up the curtains?", he roared causing the maid who was opening them up to give a frightened squeak. "Leave them alone and get the hell out of here", lifting his head little he growled to which the maid gave a nervous nod and scurried outside as if the demons of hell were in her pursuit. "What happened Gul, is the master chasing you?", two maids started teasing her when she reached their side in the kitchen, huffing, puffing and holding a stitch at her side.

"You can say that he almost chased me outside, God the way he turned those angry red eyes towards me it scared the shit out of me", she waved a hand in the air, fanning herself profusely, while her heart thumped like a scared rat scurrying across the floor.

The two maids first looked at her in shocked disbelief then broke out in raucous laughter."What? I am serious and you are laughing at me, I didn't tell you a joke did I?", she frowned to which one of them shook her head in disbelief, her lips still twitching in smile while the other one gave a sympathetic pat on her back and went outside.

"What did I do?", she asked from the maid in the kitchen who turned at once towards the sink filled with dirty crockery. "You are new aren't you"?, the maid whose name was Rihanna inquired, her hands rubbing the duster efficiently over a porcelain plate. "Yes I am but you also know that don't you", she asked in a bewildered tone. "Yes I know, but I must tell you also that we have been serving the master from almost 10 years", she dragged the dishcloth from the stand and began drying the plate until it was squeaky clean. "But why are you telling me this", the new made whose name was Rosie shrugged her shoulders exasperatedly.

"That's because we never once in our 10 years of servitude had seen the master showing any kind of emotion lest anger, and you did tell us that he was angry didn't you?", hanging the dish cloth back in its place, she started to stack the neatly cleaned dishes in the crockery stand. "You are telling me that I am lying?", anger was beginning to replace the bewilderment on Rosie's face. "Yes, and if you don't believe me ask Sam the master's woman", Rihanna free of her chores alast turned to face Rosie.

"Well I am not going to ask from anyone, what I saw was the truth", she shook her head stubbornly and turning on her heels, headed towards the door "Okay but don't go on telling these kind of stories to the other staff", Rihanna's cautious voice collided against her ears before she stormed outside, fuming...

Arnav was pacing the floor of his office, slowly coming out from his nightmare and back to reality. It was a long time ago that he had those kinds of nightmares but it was the first time in that long ago that he had been revisited by the horrors that had always been lying dormant in his unconscious mind.

With the last nightmare he had felt the fear twisting his guts and suffocating him, until he had to use the inhaler which he had swore to never use again as a consoling ration to feed to his weakness. But it had been the weakness that he had hidden perfectly for 10 years from any probing eyes, buried so deep inside him that he had himself forgotten about it. Until it had come back to haunt him in the darkness of the night...

With the rising sun the reality had also pervaded him and he felt his mind whirring to know the reason of his nightmare. And after it had dawned on him that it was that Gupta girl who was dragging those buried feelings out of his heart's crypt, he had felt the anger taking the place of his growing trepidation on being made to meet with his weaknesses again...

He had thought that he had annihilated every trace of those memories from his mind, but it was like that Gupta girl had jumped into his mind and heart with a searchlight and was trying to find some trace of those feelings and memories inside him...

He gave a rusted laugh at the thought of getting affected by some measly human emotions. Never again he would be forced to bend infront of someone; never would he rely on someone or would let them come closer to him to play with his feelings. He knew he was no weakling, he had survived the gang life so what was a slip of girl who could bring those feelings to life, he thought clenching a fist in distress...

It was time to put his final plan into action. He was going to take his final revenge for which he had waited for 24 years, with bated breath...

Gupta Residence: Three Days Later

"Choti Bibi", this letter just arrived for you. Ramu Kaka was handing a brown envelope to Khushi who was trying to fit in the car without having to destroy her heavy lehnga choli, jewellery and hairs which were piled high above her head. It was fancy dress show night at her college and Khushi had taken the role of a traditional Indian bride. "One minute Ramu Kaka", she snapped, irritated with the fall of her heavy dupatta. "Ji choti bibi", Ramu kaka fell silent but his face never showed any sign of distress or anger at her rude behaviour.

He and almost every employee of the house were quite used to their choti bibi snapping their head off, unexpectedly. And tonight with the way she was waddling like a duck towards the car, wearing heavy makeup, laden with the weight of the bridal dress and adorned with heavy jewellery which she had never once wore in her life, it was no wonder that she was feeling irritated.

Hiding his smile at the way her maid almost pushed Khushi inside the interior of the car and helped her secure her lehnga around her legs, Ramu Kaka shut the door on a sweating Khushi but not before handing her the brown envelope. Throwing him a questioning look to which Ramu Kaka shrugged unknowingly she tore of the seal to reveal a light brown paper.

But before she could see what was written inside it, the itching at her nose grew worse and she wriggled in her seat to scratch at it causing the brooch which was attaching her dupatta with the lehnga to scrape across her arm. She winced and the letter slipped out of her hand to land neatly on the car's floor...

"Never again", she huffed scratching at her arm. It was winter but she was sweating like a pig. "Never again will I wear something like that", fanning herself vigorously with a hand she slid across the seat to slide the window open. Breathing deeply in the cold but fresh air she quite forgot the letter which had slipped out of her hand. As she had shifted irritably in her seat, her stiletto feet had landed on the note, tearing a hole in the words scrawled across it...

"Tonight Khushi", the screaming message was now painted with mud...

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