'Nandini...'

So Im going to start calling you tinky winky now :D..

Do I call her mine or do I call myself hers? I don't know. Do I live in her or does she breathe in me? I don't know. Is she the girl who loves me or is she the girl "I...". I don't know.One word, one name; Nandini. Yet she holds the ability to define every emotion in his life. She seems to be the definition of his whole life. He doesn't have the words to describe her true importance. He doesn't have it in him to describe what it would mean to lose her. It's unimaginable you see. It would be unendurable. She has no start...no end. All he knows that he feels alive because of her. All he knows is that he's learnt the true essence of life, love and laughter ever since she's stepped into his world. The saying; "you've turned my world upside down." It's so befitting for him. She indeed has revolutionised his world with a whole 360 degree turn.Manik Malhotra's life took a wrong turn the day Nandini took a stand against him.. Stopping him from hitting Navya with an egg.. Aaj tak kisiko bhi yeh himmat nahi hua tha ki MAnik malhotra ko stop kare from doing anything.. The day she stops his hand from hitting NAvya.. His life changed.. She challenged him that day and that was enough to peak Manik's interest.. I am sure.. Then came when Manik got punched by a girl!!.. His life changed.. took a wild turn which Im sure he never expected...He never fumbled on his words with anyone..His words are sharp as knife that can hit home easily.. He is used to it of course from his beloved mother.. but today, the great MANIK fumbled on his words in describing a girl.. not just any girl. The girl who shines for him..who is there to wipe his pain..who is willing to take the pain herself in order to save him... He couldn't find the words to describe how much this girl meant to him.. He couldn't think of the words that needed to explain it to that girl about nandini.. He couldn't not get himself to say "if something happened to nandini, he would die, he would be a living zombie.. he would lose himself." His heart refuses to accept the love that is already in there.. the pain that he feels when she is hurt, restless or upset.. he feels everything lekin accept nahi karenge.. (kamina kahin ki, accept to kar that you love her).. Isnt it ironic sometimes.. we fall in love with the most unexpected person in this world and then everything is turned upside down..

His world. Once upon a time a dark dungeon. Like a cold, winter's night. The sky was always black. The moon overshadowed by the grey clouds. No sign of any shining diamonds for him to admire. His heart. A mere machine which was keeping him alive. Enabling him to walk, sit, eat, talk, play, move. An emotion-less heart it was. It had been numbed by the throbbing pain he had been experiencing for a whole 19 years. His fury and his heartache were his companions for as long as he could remember. His mother the curse of his existence. Her sight was enough to awake his rage. A very unhomely relationship you could say. As simple and as formal as a business deal. He used to give and she used to take. Love. A lie. Family. Never had one. Happiness. Never had he experienced. A deprived childhood. A scarred soul. He was as dead as a lifeless body. And the truth of his life was as haunting as hell. However, god had been kind enough to gift him one gift. Friends. Family-like friends. Best friends. An unbreakable friendship. They were the only drive of his life. To protect them was his lifelong promise which provided him with a means to get through the day. Yet, he was alone. His life a hollow shell. His monstrous mask; his only strength-filling support. It helped him conceal his tears. It helped him curtain his wounds. Nineteen years of friendship, yet his friends never were introduced to the real Manik. Because the real Manik was never revealed. He was non-existent. An unknown lie. But every lie is short-lived. And so when she entered, his life felt like a life for once. She was that sun that had never risen on his side of the world. Her blinding radiance could outshine the real sun in the sky. To live, to love, to laugh was her passion. And mind you she was infectious. Because before time knew it...he learnt how to laugh. He learnt how to live. He learnt how to love. He never realised when she became the reason for his heart to resume beating again. He never paid attention to when he started loving his own self. His own life. He never realised when he started looking forward for the rise of another morning. Because a new morning would mean a new day. A new day would mean another chance to see, to feel, to absorb, to experience and to understand her personality, her radiance, her liveliness, her innocence. He never realised when his life transformed from being just a pool of darkness to become a rainbow of colours and happiness. He never realised when he stopped scanning the sky to look for stars because she became his ultimate source of light. His shining star. He never realised when the value of her life in his life up scaled. She became from being one of the most important people in his life to the most important person in his life. And time now has it where she's attained the real position in his life. She's moved on from being the most important person in his life to being his life as a whole. She defined Manik Malhotra. His identity belongs to her. His time belongs to her. His heart; he lost it to her a long time ago. He's never believed in god, but he knows that if there is a god somewhere, he must be like his Nandini. He can't remember when he never trusted her because she is the reason he started to believe in the concept of trust...Manik has been living in the shadow of Monster Manik for 19 years.. ever since he learned that his damn mother is a vamp, he killed the innocent manik or buried him alive..and put on his monster face.. he was alone, like a wandering soul..who never had a home of his own.. he lived in a mansion, he had money, he was rich lekin in sab bhi woh akela tha, yyyou know like "bheer mein bhi khud ko tanha lagti hai"..Thats manik, he went partying doing concerts, he lived the life but phir bhi, he never could find peace anywhere.. Music and guitar was just his excuse to run away.. Remember during the intercollege competition, manik lost and Aliya goes like.. Manik deals with his emotions best alone lekin sach mein..Manik wishes..in fact HE CRAVED that someone was there who he can share his feelings with..he can tell about his life long problems that he has been facing..he could share about his cruel reality..his mother.. everything but he could not find anyone.. everyone was scared of the monster.. no one could see past the monster. .no one had tried to see past the monster.. This reminds me of beauty and the beast.. No one looked past the beast..no one looked into his heart or saw what a pure hearted soul he was.. Same thing with MAnik.. Since there was no one then what was the use to show his real face to anyone.. No one could understand why he put that monster face on.. everyone was just afraid of him..No one was willing to look past the monster and look deep into the soul of his.. I agree that he had awesome friends but even those friends could not see past the smile tht he put on..they could not see past the anger or monster face.. they understood about nyonika and what a evil vamp of a mother she was but still it ws not enough..Aliya was his gf for 7 years..even she could not see past the fakeness.. she could not look deep into the soul.. They were just dragging the relationship for 7 years.. they had good times but it was never true love..they were together for a time being but not destined to be together forever...Its like that song.. Humsafar hai magar manzil juda juda.. They were humsafars but their destinations were different..He lived on like this for 19 years..lekin kabhi ussko complain karte nahi dekha..like whats gonna happen if I complain? Kissi complain karu? Kaun hai jo mujhe samajh sakti hai? Koi nahi? Friends ko kuch kahu..they will worry but they cannot do anything to fill this hollowness inside my heart..inside my soul... Then enters his star... As soon as she entered...everything changed about him..he felt alive..he felt real.. for the first time in 19 years, he felt real emotions.. She affected him like a virus come on...you just met the girl and she started to affect you kaise? This can only happen if she was meant to be with you..which clearly she was..Manik finally found that one person that could fill his hollowness in his heart.. the ONE AND ONLY girl who looked past his monster face and saw him for who he really was.. a kind hearted, empty, hurt, lost soul that needs to find solace in someones arms.. and those arms were Nandini Murthy's arms.. Na jane kab aur kaise this girl became his center of everything..attention, love, hatred, anger..every emotions that he has been hiding from the world..comes out in open when he is with her.. He is a complete different human being.. His priorities had changed over time from dhruv to his friends to her only.. Don't get me wrong, he loves his friends and he is more than capable of being with them when it is needed but everything is about nandini..what she wants..what they want..what their future holds.. waqt aur pyar insaan ko kitna badaal deta hai..

So many fumbles, so many sighs. So many broken sentences, so many tries. He smiled when he mentioned that she taught him how to smile. And that same smile turned into a frown when his miseries and worries caught up to him inside. There was a "love" missing in that sentence and the last sentence should've have ended with "main mar jaaonga...". But it's not necessary for every word to be spoken. Sometimes our silence ends up expressing more than what we had hoped for. Pata nahi kab yeh ladka khud ki dhadkon ko peechanega aur accept karega..that without nandu he is dead..he loves the girl.. For the first time in his life, he is lost of words because of a girl.. he is lost of words due to his nandini...his expression was more than enough to say what his mouth and brain refuses to accept...

Today she was Manik's Nandini. "Manik...I need to meet you right now!" She figured he probably didn't understand her urgency in the first go so she repeats herself. "Manik I need you right now, I need to meet you." If her love was compelling her to act like Manik's Nandini...his care ensured him to behave like Nandini's Manik. If she was being the fire, he ought to be the water today.Her Manik. Just as puzzled as to how to reverse this first impression that Amms seems to have witnessed today. Just as fearful as to what will happen if Amms' silence takes another wrong turn and the situation becomes even more uncontrollable. "Acha listen listen listen. Woh Amms se jab mai mila tha aaj, tumne reaction dekha na unka kya tha...mujhe dekh kar. So mera waahan aana and meeting you will create more problems aur situation aur bhi kharaab ho jayegi. So let's just avoid this okay?"His Nandini. She wasn't going to take a no' as an answer today. What part of 'need' didn't he understand? Her stubbornness peaking as her needful desperation escalated. Her voice rose to a higher note too. She wasn't going to sit back and wait for the next morning to arrive. The fears were spreading. The fear of her Amms' unexplained silence. The fear of not being able to sing with him tomorrow. The fear of not being able to take their mutual hope upto the finishing line. "I need to meet you Manik...tum samaj kyun nahi rahe ho?!" Her Manik. Applying her theory of rationality to the situation today. What part of 'things will get worse' wasn't she understanding? The calm came to him naturally today. He needed to keep his mind clear and focused in order to avoid further blunders. He tried to calmly reason with her. To pacify her needful heart that to act so irrationally may not fall in their best favour. His own fears were making him restless. The fear of losing this last chance to become one another's. The fear of allowing pandit to gain another deceitful point. The fear of being separated from his source of breath if by chance her Amms rejected his suitability. "Nandini mai samaj raha hoon. But you should also try and understand. If I come there, situation aur bhi kharaab ho jayegi jo hamesha hoti hai." There's no doubt you've changed him. You've made him realise of his lifelong priorities. You. This relationship. It's his last hope. You're his last hope for his survival. So he unwillingly has to reject the offer of coming to visit you. His heart breaks to know he's upset you but he's helpless. His fears are just as overpowering. His need of you is just as demanding. But he fears for his future. He can't help but be selfish that he wants you with him for the rest of his life and so he must sacrifice this one night's visit to be able to visit you permanently for the rest of your life. Well until you two get married at least. Manik Malhotra. The boy who's never even feared a rat, fears your dearest relative today because he knows she loves you just as much as he does. And hurting her would be like hurting you. He's always been aware of the change you've brought in his life. But today his heart joyed when he realised his value in your life. It delighted him to know he's your priority too."First time...first time you were being stubborn. Stubborn to meet me. But wrong timing! Damn!" This part really surprised me..for the first time.. Nandu was acting like manik and manik was acting like nandini...Nandu was being ziddi while manik was trying to be mature..like you said.. the roles are reversed.. Nandini wanted manik to come and manik is saying no.. Usuually hamesha manik nandini ko milna chahti hai aur nandini always says no but today, manik understood how dangerous the game was getting to be.,..one wrong move and everything that he worked for..everything that nandu worked for, hoped for all this time will be ruined..destroyed so..manik is being wise in his decision..sirf ek raat ke liye he needs to control himself for running to her place and gathering her in his arms to protect her..to assure her that they will be together..if am's was not there..you think manik would wait for a phone call...pssh he would run faster than the police to reach her place.. but today he could not..he understood her urgency, her impatient..her fear..he understood but he is tied in chains... Manik's expression was super cute when he admits that wow for the first time, she is being like me to meet me..how time and roles has changed.. I used to be stubborn and now you are being stubborn.. thoda intezzar karlo nandu..promise main kaal se tumhara har zid puri karunga.. The guy that never bow downs to anyone bowed to this girl so many times..

Nandini...you've made room for yourself in the hearts of his friends too. They've realised your importance in his life. They've understood that he's incomplete without you. His best buddy seems to not understand right now but it's not your fault. You must remember it was never your fault. The fault lies in him. He's unable to digest the bitter truth of your loss. He's unable to see how he's not only inflicting pain upon his own friends but he's deepening his own wounds too by disclaiming their advices and requests. But you mustn't worry because the rest of your Manik's family has accepted you wholeheartedly. They're realised that you and him; "Nandini and Manik are destined to be together." His friends..the elite fab 3 (leaving dhruv out, until he gets his act together..) hated nandini..like HATED HER..and now they are supporting her..because she has always been there for them..She won cabir's heart from raghav story.. won mukti and aliya's heart when she helped them out both.. The fab 3 saw how much manik has changed due to her...they can clearly saw the love in Manik's eyes for nandini and instead of being sad that manik chose nandini over fab 3..they are happy for him.. they can see that this little girl means the world to their best friend..they can see that nandini is the fresh air that manik breathes in... if manik is separated from that, manik will die...his friends know it and accept it lekin manik baba ab tak accept nahi kiya..

Homecoming is so close now. You both have nearly reached your shore. Just one night remains and your one demand remains. And that's for you to meet him. Today he may have rejected that option, but tomorrow you will be the uninvited guest like he usually is at your premises and you will unexpectedly present yourself in front of his eyes. Because like Mukti said..."If he won't reach you...you will reach him..." Loved the last part, bechara choked on his drink thinking he is dreaming..that nandini was seriously there..he was shocked like wth are you doing here? Well you weren't going to come meet me so I came.. I want to see you MEANS I AM GOING TO SEE YOU!! END OF STORY!! No arguments.. I am not taking a no for an answer manik.. He was drinking thinking that if I go to her hosue..its a problem if I don't go it will deff be a problem because she will be upset then boom..she is there.. right in front of you..

I loved one of the scenes today where he took nandu's name and she called...it was so cute how he says if I wished for something else I would have gotten it...then the last scene..he was wondering what should he do..go to her house or not to go to her house..im sure he was wishing deep inside his heart, how he could meet his nandini, caress her, hold her and just be her support then boom she appears like a genie..

I love the fab 3 part.. it was a treat to watch them..i loved cabir's cunning idea that was running in his mind.. Like he had a plan with a twist.. someone is going to get beaten down and that someone is going to bhi manik instead of dhruv.. "pitega lekin manik pitega"...CAbir's idea never backfires..it always works...and his ideas are bad and cunning..LOVING IT!!!