Son...your adopted... - Page 4

Originally posted by: kabhi_21

🤣........ what a heartless mama that would be..... well i believe in letting them know that we love them lots first and then that the blood relations are not everything and then that they are adopted 😃

I totally agree with Abhi. The most important thing is to let them know first how much we love them. Adopted kids are dear to our heart and much needed and wanted. The rest I feel can unfold later.

I know of family here at the Univ. who have adopted two different kids and they have grown up and are doing just great. I also have a Catholic friend whose family adopted two kids from Ethiopia. In this case due to different skin the kids know but hey........ the love between them is just very very touching......... also considering the fact the younger of the child will have no liver by the time he reaches 20.

I realize how difficult it must be for the child to learn that his or her parents are adoptive parents. But once the truth sinks in....... there is a lot of love that binds them together. I have seen tons of shows on this.😳

Originally posted by: rutumodi915

I agree with that. But on the other hand, I hardly think it is possible to not have outsiders know about adoption. Not everyone can go abroad and have a delivery and come back saying it is their own child. There are very fair chances that many people know about the adoption. There are some ill-minded Mandiras and Komolikas in every family who will spill out the beans in one way or the other and that will shatter the life of the child completely.

I agree that it is not possible to hide it completely but I feel it's important that once close family and friends know the child is adopted...then after this the word 'adopted' should not be used again....Family and friends should not pass on this information to others like chinese whispers....

I know that ppl cant go abroad to have a delivery...but then again these days most couples dont live with their parents and tend to have their own lives...that is why it is possible to pull this off without telling alot of ppl....In the long run it is for the betterment of the child...

But if the biological parents let them know, they might try and understand and see that s/he was very well cared for, and should still continue loving them as own parents. It is not about being "mahan". For parents who reared a child for so many years, being "mahan" is probably the last thing on the mind. It is for the child's well-being that s/he needs to be informed.

Adoption is a vey sensitive issue, and it is very hard to hide it from children and IMHO, it is always good to have the children informed about the reality.

The biological mother gave birth to the baby. She didnt want the baby for whatever reason and gave it for adoptation. 1st Reality

The child gets adopted by new parents 2nd Reality

The child finds out that these parents did not give him/her birth. 3rd Reality is that this does not change the fact that the biological parents have no right over the child in any way including legally. The child's new parents are it's only Mom and Dad

Originally posted by: rutumodi915

I do NOT agree. No matter how much love parents shower on the adopted kid, once they find out, the urge to know who his/her real parents are will always nag them.

Maybe, they will be mad at their biological parents for having deserted them but that they would still want to know who they were given birth by. I have not heard or seen any cases yet where the child just forgets everything and never questions the foster parents. Anyone heard anything like that?

Fostering and adoption are different. Fostering is usually temporary while adoption is permanent, for life! Once a couple adopts a child, they are the child's parents/guardians legally.

I dont think every adopted child has the urge to find out about his/her biological parents. I guess everyone is different but if someone told me today that I was adopted I really wouldnt care. If a child is content and knows he/she cant get a better home then what can the biological parents give which the child doesnt have already....

I am 18 and if someone told me today that my parents did not give birth to me, I probably will shatter completely but would thank my parents for nurturing me the way they did. But I, most definitely would want to know who gave birth to me. Yes, it would hurt the parents immensely but imagine the plight of the child who found out his/her reaity after years...

So, I don't think any child will just let the fact pass by that they don't know their biological parents. Everyone questions IMO.

When a family adopts a child, they are usually told about the childs background and the reason why the mother/father didnt want the baby. This is very helpful for when the child grows up. If the child has any questions then he/she should ask the parents. Sometimes the biological parents even leave letter for the child which the child can read once it grows up...

Originally posted by: raunaq

I feel all these celebrity adoptions have reli ruined the image of adoptions

and how do you know that these people have ruined image. so, tell me how did they ruin the image of adoption, provide me with some real news and stories, if that has happened. if they can afford, then why not. this statement is similar to the statement if mother teresa was saint?

Dont you read in the papers how Angelina Jolie has adopted 3 kids from 3 different countries or how Madonna has adopted a black baby? The motive behind these adoptions may be genuine but in the long run this is a recipe for disaster.

Adopting a baby from Africa and taking it to America is not the solution to the problem. That child will grow up in the lap of luxury while all its brothers n sisters in Africa will continue living in Poverty. Yes, the child will get a better home, education etc in America but money does not always equate to happiness. There is no way Angelina Jolie or Madonna can teach African babies about their culture, heritage, language. I am prity sure in future most of these kids will go back to their homelands to find their identities....

as there are many families out there who genuinely want another child and are willing to give it a nice home, every happiness and treat him/her like their own child. so who is stopping them from adoption? just becoz these people dont get a chance to adopt, those celebrities have ruined the image, sorry am not getting this, please clear it again? how did the celebrities ruin the image of adoption. am i sensing the case of grapes are sour in this case? 😕

OK...Celebs are busy shooting for movies...have erratic schedules... are busy travelling the world...and alot of them dont have a steady partners....is this the best environment for a child to grow up in? ...I would love to know how much time these celebs actually spend with their adopted kids....

I had read quote by Angelina Jolie...'My friends often joke that everytime I go abroad, I come back with a baby'....I dunno about u but I dont think this is the right attitude...It just seems like she travels around the world picking up babies from different countries....they are probably like souvenirs for her.

Originally posted by: Supergirl7

OK...Celebs are busy shooting for movies...haveerratic schedules... are busy travelling the world...and alot of them dont have a steady partners....is this the bestenvironment for a child to grow up in?...I would love to know how much time these celebs actually spend with their adopted kids....

I had read quote by Angelina Jolie...'My friends often joke that everytime I go abroad, I come back with a baby'....I dunno about u but I dont think this is the right attitude...It just seems like she travels around the world picking up babies from different countries....they are probably like souvenirs for her.

Originally posted by: snowflake0555

It depends if the kid is mature or not. What if you told a 8 yr old and he got so mad that you didnt tell him earliar that he ran away from home to find his "real" parents? 😕

Maybe between 6-10...you dont wanna keep the person waiting that long 😛

Originally posted by: SmarterDesiKid

like I said before
you think a kids that young is gonna attempt to run away and find his real parents?
He can't even make it out the neighborhood with out returning back home😆

hey it could happen ok!😛
I've seen it on TV and the girl was like 9 i think