My first OS- Break UP :(

Anamika2692001 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#1
Hi guys. This is my first ever OS on IF...I'm really nervous!
This OS is based on some spoiler which was posted on FB...about Sandhir breaking up in the near future!😭
Hope you like it.
Before starting, I'd like to dedicate this OS to Moony87.
The most affable, friendly, funny and sweet girl I've met on IF, who encouraged me to go ahead with this. Love you, Chandu di! ❤️😳
Here it goes...
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On a cold evening in the mechanical lab of FITE, Randhir and Sanyukta stood facing each other...yet another fight, yet another misunderstanding.
"I've already told you Randhir, I am not going to work in Renuka Ma'am's company. I am not going to support you in this stupid revenge," said Sanyukta, with blazing eyes and a determined stance.
Randhir was furious hearing the words 'stupid revenge' from Sanyukta's mouth.
He tightened his hands into fists, trying to control the anger which was rushing through his veins.
"STUPID REVENGE!" He hollered, loud enough for the whole town of Roorkee to hear.
"That woman destroyed my father's life and my life too! She was never a good mother or wife... all she ever cared about was her career and her happiness. She was and will always be selfish.
No. I have to fulfil the promise I made to Dad," he said.
"But you should try to understand your mother's situation as well. She worked so that she could raise you and-"
Sanyukta was interrupted by the sound of a machine being broken.
And then, at that moment, everything fell apart...just like the machine parts.
Randhir turned towards Sanyukta with a smirk and said, "You know what? I should have known. I should have known that all women are the same. That all their promises are fake. That they are not caring and genuine but manipulative and selfish. Just like that Renuka Sanyal. You'll obviously defend her. Because YOU are just like her. You would choose your career over me any day."
"I expected a bit too much from you. I am the biggest fool ever!! You also betrayed me...like everyone else does, and always has. So now, you listen to me."
"I BREAK UP WITH YOU, SANYUKTA AGARWAL! And I will destroy not only that Renuka Sanyal, but you too."
Sanyukta looked right into Randhir's eyes, and with a mirthless smile, said, "So it's over. Once and for all. I break up with you too, Randhir Singh Shekhawat. I don't give a damn about where you go or what you do now. But remember one thing...this revenge will not only destroy the ones you want to hurt...it will lead you towards YOUR OWN DOOM. And when you burn in the hell created by you, maybe you'll realise what I was trying to say. Goodbye."
Without even a second glance, Randhir left the lab.
Sanyukta just stared as he left behind the broken pieces of the machine...and also the broken pieces of her heart. She didn't even notice when tears started flowing down her cheeks. Tears of anger, pain, hurt and sorrow. She wiped her tears and walked back to her room, dragging her feet like a lifeless zombie.
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Randhir banged the door as he entered his room. He was all alone. He shouted and screamed and threw things all around. And then, he came across a scrapbook...the same scrapbook which Sanyukta had gifted to him. With shaking hands, he opened the scrapbook and flipped through it. Their first meeting, first challenge, first competition, first fight...first kiss. All the memories came rushing back to him.
And then, he just fell apart. Whatever little strength he had was gone. He could feel his heart being crushed under a road roller.
With the scrapbook in his hand, unbearable pain in his heart and tears in his eyes, Randhir passed out on the floor.
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So that's it guys! How was it? I hope you all liked it. 😊
Please like if you think this OS is good enough to be liked and surely do comment.😳 Constructive criticism is welcome.
PS- I'm thinking of writing two sequels to this OS. They'll be about the aftermath of the break up and its effects on Randhir and Sanyukta. One will be in RD's POV and the other will be in Sanyu's POV. But I'll continue only if you guys want me to. So please tell me if I should continue or not. 😳
LOTSA LOVE
AMREEN 😉
Edited by Anamika2692001 - 10 years ago

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foreverhers thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#2
Aiyoo! Seems like I'm the first lucky person to come across this OS..Yay!😆
RESERVED
UNRESERVED

Where were you all these days girl??? I just can't believe that this is your first OS...
This OS is a finest piece of art which evokes many ironical feelings be it agonizing or soothing, simultaneously.
You have overwhelmed me with both heart warming and heart wrenching emotions. Kudos to you girl for presenting this entire forthcoming senario with such magnificence.
Randhir, although, might be blinded by the flames of revenge coursing in his veins but once it subsides, he's going to repent it...
You have beautifully and fantastically penned down the emotional turmoil both Randhir and Sanyukta are facing.
I was really shattered to learn about the promo but I'm glad that atleast it has some positive imapct on our forum and we got an extremely splendid writer...

We are gonna get two sequels of this OS???
Hell, I'm eagerly waiting for them already..
If possible then pen them today and post them tomorrow...
Ah! This OS was really a treat to read.
Do write more sis...

Regards
Keya

P.S.- ah! It seems as if I have blabbered out much.. Hope you don't doze off while reading this review. I got carried away.😆
Edited by -foreverhers- - 10 years ago
Anamika2692001 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#3
Jaldi unres kar dena. 😆
And I'm expecting a long and analytical review. After all, you're a great writer, and so philosophical. 😳
Hope you liked it, Keya di. 😊
foreverhers thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: Anamika2692001


[/DIV]
Jaldi unres kar dena. 😆


And I'm expecting a long and analytical review. After all, you're a great writer, and so philosophical. 😳


Hope you liked it, Keya di. 😊[/


Moi abhi unres karne waali hoon meri sweet sis...
Kya?! Kisi ne meri taarif ki.. 😲 Moi not at all good sis, specially after reading this OS, I think I have to improve my story writing...
Philosophical? Tu zara mil moi ko scraps mein moi tere ko philosophy batati hoon..
Aiyooo... Sirf Keya bolo.😆
Anamika2692001 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: -foreverhers-

Aiyoo! Seems like I'm the first lucky person to come across this OS..Yay!😆
RESERVED
UNRESERVED

Where were you all these days girl??? I just can't believe that this is your first OS...
This OS is a finest piece of art which evokes many ironical feelings be it agonizing or soothing, simultaneously.
You have overwhelmed me with both heart warming and heart wrenching emotions. Kudos to you girl for presenting this entire forthcoming senario with such magnificence.
Randhir, although, might be blinded by the flames of revenge coursing in his veins but once it subsides, he's going to repent it...
You have beautifully and fantastically penned down the emotional turmoil both Randhir and Sanyukta are facing.
I was really shattered to learn about the promo but I'm glad that atleast it has some positive imapct on our forum and we got an extremely splendid writer...

We are gonna get two sequels of this OS???
Hell, I'm eagerly waiting for them already..
If possible then pen them today and post them tomorrow...
Ah! This OS was really a treat to read.
Do write more sis...

Regards
Keya

P.S.- ah! It seems as if I have blabbered out much.. Hope you don't doze off while reading this review. I got carried away.😆



Thank you so much! 😳 I don't know what else to say.
Will surely update soon. 😊
Good night.
Paravi thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#6
yepiii.. Technically I am second
* glares at keya *
Better luck next time...
Coming to the os
Don't tell me this is your first os...??
How can someone write so beautifully for
The first time depicting each and every thing
Through which we could relate...??
It was a beautiful os...
Although it was a sad one but
Writing a sad os is the most difficult task
Atleast for me .. And you have written a sad os
As your first os... Good work girl
You described each and every a sentiment
Fantastically ...!! But still I hope this just remains a
Os ...!! It should not be shown in the show..
And obviously it should continue...
Yeh koi puchne ki baat hai.. Hehe
Continue soon
Thanks for the pm
Love Janavi
BornAries thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#7
Amreen 🤗 wow! wow! just amazing... :) :)



Its ur first oS?? wow! i can see another budding writer of the forum..that too so talented... :) :*

Coming to the OS...OMG! its sheer brilliance... u depicted Randhir perfectly... as he is... the short tempered RSS ... wow!


Sanyukta...yeah! those words uttered by her...is so similar to her character... that means u penned both the character flawlessly ... awesome ... 🤗

u r asking whether to continue??? :O 😲 so listen to me...if u dont continue it... I will spam ur post ... hahah!!! 🤣 ab bolo? 🤣

and Thank U for the PM ... 🤗

Continue soon ... 😳

Angel__Tamanna thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#8
Res

Uness

Hey dear,
this was awsm
continue for sure
& pm me

update soon
Edited by Angel__Tamanna - 10 years ago
newmoon18 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#9
Omg what a piece of art
Don't tell me this is ur first attempt

It was freaking awsme
Yr I so luved it

It was beautifully written

U nailed it dear
Hell amzng

We r going to get more parts
Yipeee
For sure continue it
Would luv to read it
Update soon
Pm me for sure

Luv u
Keep smiling
Moony87 thumbnail
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Posted: 10 years ago
#10
Eee.. Ailaaa.. Mujhe dedication.. That too your first OS.. 😃.. I am honored kudiye.. 😳😳.. Us par Itni taareef ki meri.. Good yaar.. Hameshaa aise hi sach bolte rehna mere baare mein.. 🤣

Now.. Kahaan thi yaar inne din.. Damn girl you are a really talented writer 👏. And this is an awesome piece of writing. Randhir has always intrigued me to no ends and marking your first OS with him.. Perfecto.. 👏👏👏

For the first time ever I'll agree with Sanyukta.. 😆😆 .. Kudos to you Amreen for this.. 😆😆.. Yep.. Not knowing the other half of the story is dangerous and building revenge on it is not just stupid but also destructive. SO yes Sanyukta is right and its good that she aint supporting him.

Its high time he sees right and wrong on his own.

The way you have described their break up is painful... Words chosen are so apt.. 👏👏👏

Awesome yaar.. Keep writing more.. Keep dedicating more to me.. 😆

PS:- Ek PARAN par OS likh de.. 😉😃
Edited by Moony87 - 10 years ago

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