Raman was thinking for the past few weeks of how he was going to confess his feelings to his wife. His day started and ended with her and her thoughts...he could not concentrate on his work anymore nor could he sleep peacefully with her under the same roof. Initially he tried to hide his feelings not wanting to disturb whatever rapport they already shared ...But, now he was sure that he didn't want to hide it anymore, he was really in love with her and wanted to take their relationship forward. He knew she also cared for him but didn't know till what extent she wanted to go in their relationship. But the more he tried to put across the signal to her, the more he understood that his wife was too naive to understand his twisted tactics...
As far as raman understood, she was happy being just ruhi's ishima...sometimes he felt unless until he tells her on her face that he wants a physical relation with her and not just her care and concern, she would never understand. All they had done till now was fighting and arguing ...raman thought maybe his taunts and rude behaviour was what kept her away...He decides to be sweet to her from now on...but things take a worst turn for him as then they had nothing to talk about... She became more and more engrossed in her mommy avatar... Afterall there was nothing to lecture him about. He was exactly what she wanted him to be...loving and responsible to ruhi, sweet to her and to all of the family, stopped drinking, came home early and spent time with ruhi...
Ishu had applied for a PhD course in London before their marriage and she received their call informing her about her selection. She also got a mail from them telling her to join within one month. The mail included hostel facilities, air ticket details and almost everything which a person wanted to know. She becomes happy that she got such a good opportunity but also knew she could not make it. She kept the reply pending, she could not leave her ruhi and raman and go away...
Ishu was happy seeing him in good mood these days. Little did she know all his smiles and dreams were filled with her. Her expectations from raman as her husband had started to grow but after the fake confession she had suppressed it in her heart for ever and decided to never expect anything... she thought maybe she really wasn't his type, he was forced into this marriage and he had honestly told her that he can never accept her in that way... so maybe it was impossible for him to fall for her...She had been proposed by quite a few guys in college but then she was already in a relationship with subbu. She could not digest the fact that her husband whom she loved this much didn't find her attractive enough to share a husband-wife relation. Her heart ached the more she thought about it. It hurt her when her sisters shared stories of their married life. She tried her level best to control her feelings towards him and with lot of effort she gets herself accustomed to the fact that Raman can never be interested in her as a woman and learnt to be happy with what she had...
For the past few weeks, ishu met shagun regularly while going to leave ruhi to school. She could notice a visible change in shagun... she cared for ruhi and often asked ishu whether she could spent time with ruhi. Ishu felt uncomfortable seeing shagun getting close to ruhi. But she suppressed her insecurity and went along with them for ice-cream, to park etc...Shagun shared certain stories of how she and raman had a perfect family life, how raman loved her like crazy and how foolish she was to spoil everything... Ishita could only listen helplessly of how her husband was head over heels in love with his ex-wife... Something she could never experience. Ruhi was excited with all the attention by shagun and also enjoyed adi's love and affection for her. She once mentioned to ishu of how she had always dreamt about her mom returning and all 4 of them living like happy family again before she met ishita. Little ruhi was unaware of the hurt caused to her ishima with those words ...
Differences had crept up b/w shagun and ashok ... adi realised his mistake of trusting ashok. He called raman to apologize and from that day maintained a healthy relation with raman. Raman took adi and ruhi out on weekends and sometimes ishu too joined them. With each passing day her pain and insecurity increased. Once after a tiring day at clinic she went along with sarika to have coffee only to find raman-shagun-adi and ruhi already there, enjoying themselves... before she knew tears started rolling down her cheeks which was noticed by sarika too. They left without having coffee... ishu asked raman about the day and he never mentioned going out with shagun and kids.
As days passed shagun started openly wishing of getting back raman in her life... she tried to convince ishita that both her kids needed their parents equally and she had spoke to raman too. Adi requested ishita to help their family re-unite. He informs ishu that his dad had promised him the same. Shagun had realised her mistake and really wanted raman back in her life. She and adi tried everything to get ishu to agree to them... Ruhi formed a good bond with shagun and adi and even stayed overnight at their place once... They tricked ruhi saying that her papa and ishima needed time together and that she needed to give them some time for themselves... Though ruhi could not sleep without her ishima, she agrees just for her parents sake...
Ishita was losing grip of her senses and her only blessing in life - Ruhi also was drifting away from her... The day Ruhi stayed with shagun, ishu cried her heart out... She was losing everything and she felt helpless. All family members including iyers were away to chennai and only Raman and ishita was left at home... Raman was excited to know they were alone today and decides to confess and propose to her. He leaves office early, get few gifts for her including a diamond ring and heads home... He had revised his lines of how he was going to propose her umpteen number of times over the past weeks... He was apprehensive of her reply but prayed and hoped it to be positive. He knew he would not be able to handle her rejection... With his heart hammering in his chest he reaches home to find ishu sitting in bedroom in the dark. She senses his presence and quickly wipes away her tears...
Raman goes to her and tells her he need to talk to her about something serious. She turns around to face him... raman becomes concerned seeing her face all reddened up due to crying. He asks her the reason but she just brushes it off saying it is just headache... He takes her hand and makes her sit on the bed and settles beside her... He fumbles for a starting choosing each word carefully... Just as he starts about their marriage she thinks he is going to tell her what adi wanted... She shoots up from bed and jerks her hand away from him. Raman becomes shocked by her behaviour and gets up worried. Ishu decides she will not let him say what he wanted to. She did not have the strength to hear her husband telling her to leave him... that was the last thing on earth she wanted to hear and literally shuddered at the thought. Raman gently placed his hand on her shoulder worried seeing her restless and tense. She leaves the room quickly telling him she was sleeping overnight at Iyers place as she had to read for tomorrow's surgery. Raman was left open-mouthed in their room trying to register what just happened. He felt she needed rest and he will talk to her tomorrow morning. Both had sleepless night thinking about the other...
Ishita gets a dream of both raman and ruhi telling her to leave them so that they could get their family back. Ishita wakes up all flustered and checks her mail to see the date of her supposed travel. She realises it is the same day and she has to leave in the evening. Ishita gets all disturbed and goes to meet shagun early morning. She finds ruhi sleeping peacefully with adi... she goes and kisses her on her forhead and tells a silent good-bye to her... Shagun asks her what she decided... ishu tells she is leaving for London today evening and makes Shagun promise to take good care of ruhi and raman too... with a heavy heart she leaves with a last glance at her princess. All she could think was; she was not destined to be a mother and a wife... It may be the reason her husband could never love her. She did not want to cling onto him till he tells her to leave... and she also did not want to be the reason for separating him from the only love of his life -shagun... He was young and deserved a normal life and if she could not give him the happiness as his wife, he had every right to get it from shagun...the fact being their marriage was just a contract for him... The day passed fast for her as she was busy making alternative arrangements in her clinic, packing etc... Raman on the other hand found her missing from morning and called her clinic to be informed that she was busy. He decides to tell her to take a few days off and relax. He planned an outing for them and ruhi for 2-3 days in Goa before their family returned...
NOTE: (next part will be updated soon... will finish in two more parts. I think starting is somewhat like my first story... but hope you find it different and worth your time... plz give feedbacks and press like toođłđłđł)
Had started writing this sometime back...but as mahaanata fever is on now, I thought why not make use of it...đ
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