ASHLOK FF - AT FIRST SIGHT Last Chapter - Page 51

Welcome Dear 😉

Thanks for the lovely reply ma...

waiting for the next update...but dont rush..take u r own time dear...

Aastha is a reservoir holding water beyond its capability..the grief inside her, in d form of water,is calm, n still ..for d ones who look at her..but th pressure it exerts on d weak walls of her heart is enormous..!n finally..d ever widening cracks on d wall of her sanctuary betrayed her..it spilled d contents she kept concealed 4 all these years..now shlok knows what's inside her!!

but she's also smart..she put cement mixture back on d cracks, but this tym she didn't realize dat d proportion is wrong!! in d process she did hurt shlok, but shlok is not just blind in love, but also numb to these kinda pain..

but d end.. i must say..it was totally unxpected n perfect...❤️

Deeps! You are a deep thinker. You really are. What more can I say. Love everything and how you explained everything. It's just so beautiful. Thank you.

It's my pleasure. Will post the next update soon.

Your like Jane with your use of metaphors. It's just so beautiful. I envy you. I don't even know what to say. This time the consistency is all rong. So the cement is not setting. It's all crumbling ...

I'll just stop at that. You are truly brilliant. I'm still waiting for my punishment.

Thank you sweet lil Anju for all these beautiful words.

Give me all your pains and I'll make it mine

Take all my happiness and make it yours

I'm your devotee your heart my shrine

Let me pay homage my love, open thine doors

~* AnupamA *~

"Call me" are you out of your mind. What's wrong with you?

Astha was cursing herself. She couldn't believe what she had written in the note. But beneath all the self denial her heart was having a private celebration of its own. She kept looking at her phone. Was she waiting for him to call. It was a tug of war between her heart and mind. Heart was rejoicing and mind was exasperating. Who's gonna win?

He kept looking at the note sitting in his hotel room. He took out his organizer and put the note with the rest of the notes that she'd sent him. He closed it and took his phone to call her. He checked the time. It was still too early. She'd be still seeing patients.

He tried watching a movie, checked his mails. Spoke to Varad about business and family in general. Anjali called just like every other day and inquire when he's coming home and of course about Astha. He's yet to tell her about the fact that she's got two girls. He told himself it's not important to share this information with her not just yet. First he needs to convince Astha. Then he'll reveal it to his family.

He couldn't wait any longer. He checked the time, it was 7 pm. He finally dialled her number! His heart was beating so fast with anticipation and he couldn't hide his excitement.

She kept looking at her phone checking to see if it's on or not. She was getting anxious. Is he still upset with her for what she said the last time they me, last time they spoke to each other.

She was on her night shift. Every month they needed to do 4 night shifts. It was her second one for the month. She was sitting in her room. Looking at the note. And a smile appeared on her face.

Then her phone rang. She looked at the number... She knew it was him before checking the number..she just knew it was him. Call it instincts call it intuition call it telepathy, call it what ever..she just knew it was him.

Her heart skipped a beat. Is she going to answer his call fianally? She's the one who asked him to call her. She should at lest have the decency to answer...right?

"Astha, I'm listening! Please just say something."

"Shlok, I don't know what to say or where to begin. Or whether we should even be having this convocation? My life is very complicated. I don't want to ruin your life by being selfish. It's best for both of us if you'd just forget about me. Please forgive me" She barley managed to say it without completely breaking down.

"Astha, I'm still here. I'm not running to the airport to get away from you. Life is meant to be complicated. We all have our ups and downs. Do you think my life has been a cake walk? It's been anything but that. But I'm not letting my past dictate my future. I too have been deeply hurt and let down by people whom I trusted." She listened to his deep voice that was filled with emotion.

"Shlok, I'm sorry I have to go now" she needed to be in the ICU. She didn't have time to think it over. She ended the call and ran towards the elevator. Her mind still lingering on what he had just revealed to her. What did he mean. Who's hurt him. May be his girl friend. But he didn't say loved. He just said trusted. As soon as she stepped out of the elevator she was given a update on the patients situation and she was in Dr. Astha mode. Lovelorn Astha would have to wait.

He was happy and confused at the same time. Happy that she finally spoke to him, answered his call and revealed something about her. Sad for her pain and to think how she must be feeling. But more than anything their convocation gave him hope. Hope is the only driving factor even when everything else is lost.

Few hours later she was getting out of her scrubs when her phone buzzed. It was a message from him.

"Astha, please let me decide if I want my life to get complicated or not. And my answer is yes. I'd rather have a complicated life with you than no life at all. I can't think of a life without you in it."

She read it. Not once but many times.

Why is he so determined to ruin his life. When I'm giving him warning after warning why is he so adamant to let go of me. Is he stupid. He's ready to jump into untested water head first not knowing how deep it is. Can anybody love another so deeply that they don't care for their own happiness but other ones? He truly deeply loves me. But why? I'm not pretty, I'm not rich, I'm not hip and stylish I'm a single mother. But with all these flaws he still love me. Do I deserve him? Do I deserve to be loved by him or be the sole recipient of his unconditional love?

Should I keep on punishing myself for a crime i didn't commit? Am I not worthy of being loved? Should I spend the rest of my life hurting and alone? Don't I deserve to have my happy ever after? Shouldn't I give him a chance? I have nothing to loose and everything to gain. But what about my babies? Will they like him? Will he love my kids just like his own? Can trust him with my girls? What if history repeats it self? What about his family? Will they accept me with my babies?

She felt as if her head was spinning out of control. Her life was spinning out control. Few weeks back everything was in order. She happy with her life. Was everything really ok? Was she really happy?

She had few more hours till her shift ends but when ever she's not with a patient her thoughts were constantly lingered on Shlok. She remembered third first meeting that fateful night. Just how quickly things have chaged. She often wondered how anybody can fall in love so deeply in such a short timespan? She missed him. She wished to hear his voice, see his mischievous smile. His fragrance. His warmth. She wished to see him again. But what does that mean? Do they have a future to look forward to? Is she ready to share her deep dark past? What will he think of her? Will he still love her?

She was getting irritated and frustrated with all these questions. She decided to take matters into her own hands. For once let her decide what she wants. She wanted to take control of her life. All these years she been doing what circumstances compelled her to. For her Mother, then her own guilt and then her kids.

She told herself it's now or never. She took the phone and dialled his number. She didn't realise what time it was.

He was lying in the dark hotel room. Only the moonlight giving some light. Unable to sleep. Unable to stop thinking about her. Then his phone started to ring. He quickly reached for it. It was her. His heart was in his mouth. He feared for her...has anything happened to her? Is she ok? He couldn't answer the phone fast enough.

"Shlok, I'm ..."

"Astha, is everything ok...are you ok... " he couldn't speak any faster.

Then she realised the time. It was 2.30 am.

"Shlok, shlok...listen to me..I'm fine. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry to call you at this hour. I didn't realise the time." She said feeling extremely upset.

"Astha, what's going on?" He asked with bated breath.

"Shlok, I'm sorry to disturb you so late. I didn't realise it was this late. I'm sorry. I needed to talk to you. I'll call you tomorrow...

You are writing astha ans shlok emotions perfectly. ...loved it anu...

Wow! Your mom is a romantic.

Thanks Raji glad you like the update. She's got it bad too... Now we know it.