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She puts everything on the backburner and all her questions center around Rudra and his Mommy secret. She is so rattled by Rudra's agony and a curiosity shop at his human shades , that she doesn't leave Sunehri in peace until she knows why Rudra's mother is his thorn in the heart. She worries about baby Rudra and how sad he must have been. She almost accuses the mysterious mother for daring to break his heart. Or should i say the heart of her "unhone" ( it sounds like music from her mouth - there is a respectful fondness in the way she says it). She is a prisoner and he has destroyed her life , but her heart and her thoughts plunge towards that " chhotta sa baccha". Her thoughts only mildly divert to her misery when Rukmini visits. But as soon as she sees Rudra , her eyes cloud again and she feels bad for him. She doesn't know what to say that can make the "chhotta baccha " feel better. In that moment, irrespective of all the animosity between them , Paro wanted to say something to make him feel better. Call it her basic compassion or her dormant attachment to him, but she did want to heal his septic. And when Rudra broke her heart. she patted the hope dove in her heart and told her to stop dreaming of the "chhotta baccha". This is Rudra.
She moves beyond the emotional connect and displays some perfect psychological symmetry and synchronization with Rudra. Lying and deceiving is not Paro's nature - but she handles Mausam aunty's potato and Jaipur questions like an innocent pro. Imagine! Just imagine! Paro cooked a whole story of potatoes and missing Lugaais on the spot. Whatever Rudra has told her and she has observed of him, she used it with presence of mind. And the girl is innocence - not dumbness. She uses her brain and asks Rudra to teach her the use of kitchen appliances - her smartness in keeping the pretense of a Jaipur city girl may not be perfect - but its almost the work of a budding pro at it.
We, again, return to the emotional synchronization. When Rudra rips open his heart and his gallons of venom, Paro lets him know that she is not foolish. She can see that he is suffering , that she is not alone in this desert - he is here, burning with her. No, she will not say anything to save herself or get rid of being his fiancee. They will stay here in this cold palace , suffer together , so that if she is hurting , he is in pain as well - lets call it mutual punishment , but we are in this together. And as she says so, tears well up in her eyes, scared of the man in front of her, and yet full of intrigue and a laidback sympathy. The eyes that send Rudra running off in terror of being recognized and embraced.
In perfect sync to this is Rudra. He has read the sympathy flamingo flying in Paro's pupils. He has understood that his defences are dropping and she is beginning to see through him. He uses the only weapon that he has - TEMPER. He goes charging at Paro and accuses her in angry tears that he is in this state because of her. He came back to this dungeon because of her. He is bearing all this torture because of her. And he hates this sympathy in her eyes and he hates this face of hers - because it makes him and reminds him of the word VULNERABLE.
Rudra tries to return to the cold and quiet pattern by re-attaching to his "Kya?" and the steady , in-your-face gaze as he teaches her the workings of a kitchen. He behaves as though nothing happened , but once the Pandora's box opened , we all know it was never closed. So, as soon as the dining table is vacated by the Ranawat family , Rudra reminds Paro and reiterates the fact that he is her enemy , that she hates him and that her destroyed life is his handiwork. He baits her again that she can be released from this cold palace if she tells the truth and sides with BSD. But the answer that Paro gives him is on some other tangent altogether - the tangent that is beyond the case - the tangent of Rudra and Paro. Her answer and her eyes scare the living daylights out of Rudra.
What follows is not a threat or an outburst. ITS THE TRUTH. When Rudra drops his fortress in front of Paro in frustration , and leads her to his bedroom , he is telling the truth in form of an accusation. When he says that Paro is mistaken if she has understood his pain, his agony , his abyss , his starless night , he knows that she is NOT mistaken. When he says that what she thinks or says has impact on him , he means that he is terrified of what she is doing to him. When he makes her beauty sound like an abuse, he is not abusing her there, he is reminding himself that beauty is an abuse to humanity.
Rudra is beginning to understand that Paro is becoming synchronized with him , so all his outburst on Paro today is the outburst of an ostrich who hides his neck in the desert , hoping that truth shall not follow him. More than the Tejawat case, you can see Rudra is desperate to put Paro out of is life - he doesn't want Paro to forget even for a millisecond that she should see him only his venom. He does NOT see hatred in Paro's eyes and that is what drives him mad and makes him as scared as a goat being chased by a predator.
Rudra just got a shocker trailer today of a very very minute possibility that his and Paro's relationship of a captor and a captive might shift weight. He bent his spine for her safety and she melted her pupils for his agony.
Emotional and Psychological Synchronization are signs of true soulmates. Soulmates who may have met just yesterday but have lived in each-other through sands of time.Rudra and Paro have slipped into that pattern like hand in a glove.
Title of the post today? See the episode and you will know. Ajeeb baat hai. Insaan barbaadi ki taraf bhaagta hai, lekin mohabbat se khauff khaata hai. Sympathy is not an abuse or alms in a beggar bowl. It only means that someone is human enough to shed a tear for you. Simple.
P.S- Mausam Aunty is a CID fan and she has been contributing to the ratings of that cult show since past 16 years. Kudos!
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