Ovi is too much DT note pg19 - Page 21

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Pari, simply writing to correct some misconceptions here.

I have ALWAYS from the beginning held all 3 responsible for that deal, starting from my post "tarred with the same brush" so I am not absolving Purvi or Arjun from guilt, never have, I just cannot understand how Ovi can be completely absolved of guilt and the entire crime can be laid at Purvi's feet alone. There is a difference between blaming all 3 and only one. I am guessing if you blame Ovi for her part in this deal, that we do agree at least on that point.

Jhanvi, I have not been around on this forum forever, hence I have to assume what you mean because you do pull for Purvi a lot and majorly so I simply assumed you do not hold her responsible for the deal as much as you hold Ovi. Hence, the assumption. anyway, I do agree with you on this that all 3 are responsible. ;)

As far as Arjun not coming clean at the party, I think you misread what I wrote. I was referring to your post "Now at that party, where the whole thing was laid bare to all, the facade Arjun-Ovi were following, the unconsummated status and even Arjun's undying love for Purvi. Ovi declared for one and all to hear that she was tired of this, could not take it anymore and wanted to move on. SO that was her first step towards making this right." Correct me if I am wrong I was assuming you were referring to this as Ovi coming clean or "making it right". I was not referencing to Arjun coming clean or not in my post. In fact, we might, just might, be of the same mind here as well. I cited the first night of marriage in my post when he laid bare the truth of his loving Purvi and Purvi alone before Ovi, so he came clean that night itself, let alone the day of the party.

haha, this is a case of miscommunication or misunderstanding actually..I thought you referred to Arjun coming clean on the party day not Ovi. As for Ovi coming clean, I don't call it coming clean. I just call it acceptance of her marriage failure and ready to move on. Arjun had always had a chance to walk out of this marriage. He loved Purvi and Ovi loved Arjun, Tell me who "needed" to divorce more? But anyway, clearly we agree that Arjun is a most spineless lover and husband both, so let us rejoice on that agreement :)

Purvi should have waited and advised her mother until Ovi got out of her depression? Purvi did not know Ovi was "depressed" (of course, she should have assumed it, right? 😆) and also it is not the job of an 18 year old to be advising her parents on how to take care of her long lost, no love lost between them, hardly know her at that point, sibling. All the world's troubles cannot be placed at Purvi's door, just cannot be done, even if the girl idiotically thinks she has the shoulders of Hercules.

Dear Jhanvi, Purvi could think that she has reigns of her mother's relationship with her husband in her hands, so why not the thought spared for kids? You cannot hold her mighty for one, and unconcerned for the other. Purvi knew Ovi had committed suicide. Any woman, any lady, would feel this knowing that her fiance JUST broke up with another girl. Purvi had broken up with Vinay, she should for one know how breaking off an engagement feels like. But she was busy romancing, not sparing a thought for a fellow girl who was just dumped for her sake. She had slapped Arjun righteously for having fooled her and Ovi both, so what suddenly made her feel alright about getting married hurriedly while other daughter was still dealing with it. She chooses her causes and that is not mahaan, because that is her convenience.

I do not believe Purvi ever told Arjun Ovi is a bad mother, she told him to take care of Pari, nothing wrong in that. In fact, if I recall right, at the hospital, she told him to take care of Pari and Ovi. I agree none of her business what happens in the Arjun-Ovi marriage (wrote that yesterday in response to your post, highlighting it in case you missed it), she should let them to flounder, sink, swim or stay afloat, their call entirely.

As for Ovi giving 100% to her marriage she was not earlier, she was recently making a successful attempt to do so and that is why I was beginning to soften towards her :) As to why Arjun is not giving his 100%,that is not the point of this discussion, this is about Purvi and Ovi not why Arjun is not keeping his end of the bargain. You read my initial post to you in its entirety, I hope. I did say there that Arjun owes his allegiance to his wife now. Again, have high-lighted it, just in case.

Pari, I am glad you wanted my POV but would like to ask you to please dismiss any pre-conceived notions you may have about my slant on PR as you stated/implied that I want an ARVI re-union, that I do not blame Purvi and Arjun (along with Ovi) for the deal or that I do not want Arjun to stay true to his wife. These are not my opinions at all as I have been repeatedly and 'exhaustedly' saying.

Jhanvi dear, I was no implying anything at all or mocking you for your views. I have every now and then re-iterated that I enjoy your views and hence ask for it. I don;t do that with anybody else who does not have an opinion like me. I assumed so because I do not read every post on this forum so when you defend Purvi that much I automatically feel like if she gets back with Arjun, it is in her and your interest. But glad to know we are on the same page about breaking marriages on this count :) I apologize if my tone did not come across as I intended it to and came off as strong, really was not my intention..I write in between work breaks so never get to edit or read through after writing a long post..maybe that's why. :)

Come now, let us put PR out of our minds temporarily at least, peace out! 😊

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Pari, simply writing to correct some misconceptions here.

I have ALWAYS from the beginning held all 3 responsible for that deal, starting from my post "tarred with the same brush" so I am not absolving Purvi or Arjun from guilt, never have, I just cannot understand how Ovi can be completely absolved of guilt and the entire crime can be laid at Purvi's feet alone. There is a difference between blaming all 3 and only one. I am guessing if you blame Ovi for her part in this deal, that we do agree at least on that point.

As far as Arjun not coming clean at the party, I think you misread what I wrote. I was referring to your post "Now at that party, where the whole thing was laid bare to all, the facade Arjun-Ovi were following, the unconsummated status and even Arjun's undying love for Purvi. Ovi declared for one and all to hear that she was tired of this, could not take it anymore and wanted to move on. SO that was her first step towards making this right." Correct me if I am wrong I was assuming you were referring to this as Ovi coming clean or "making it right". I was not referencing to Arjun coming clean or not in my post. In fact, we might, just might, be of the same mind here as well. I cited the first night of marriage in my post when he laid bare the truth of his loving Purvi and Purvi alone before Ovi, so he came clean that night itself, let alone the day of the party.

Purvi should have waited and advised her mother until Ovi got out of her depression? Purvi did not know Ovi was "depressed" (of course, she should have assumed it, right? 😆) and also it is not the job of an 18 year old to be advising her parents on how to take care of her long lost, no love lost between them, hardly know her at that point, sibling. All the world's troubles cannot be placed at Purvi's door, just cannot be done, even if the girl idiotically thinks she has the shoulders of Hercules.

I do not believe Purvi ever told Arjun Ovi is a bad mother, she told him to take care of Pari, nothing wrong in that. In fact, if I recall right, at the hospital, she told him to take care of Pari and Ovi. I agree none of her business what happens in the Arjun-Ovi marriage (wrote that yesterday in response to your post, highlighting it in case you missed it), she should let them to flounder, sink, swim or stay afloat, their call entirely.

As for Ovi giving 100% to her marriage she was not earlier, she was recently making a successful attempt to do so and that is why I was beginning to soften towards her :) As to why Arjun is not giving his 100%,that is not the point of this discussion, this is about Purvi and Ovi not why Arjun is not keeping his end of the bargain. You read my initial post to you in its entirety, I hope. I did say there that Arjun owes his allegiance to his wife now. Again, have high-lighted it, just in case.

Pari, I am glad you wanted my POV but would like to ask you to please dismiss any pre-conceived notions you may have about my slant on PR as you stated/implied that I want an ARVI re-union, that I do not blame Purvi and Arjun (along with Ovi) for the deal or that I do not want Arjun to stay true to his wife. These are not my opinions at all as I have been repeatedly and 'exhaustedly' saying.

Come now, let us put PR out of our minds temporarily at least, peace out! 😊

Originally posted by: pari87

I too was a tremendous supporter of Arjun - I have a son of around the same age - and till he caved in on that hilltop to Purvi's bludgeoning emotional blackmail, I was one of his stoutest defenders against all comers. But that now seems like a distant dream,or perhaps an oasis in the dreary desert that PR is today. I have now come to terms with it, and the only person I like in PR these days is Onir, whose simple goodness -though he is irritatingly naive at times - I find both refreshing and reassuring. That is why I have stopped posting on my own threads; I do not have the heart for it any more.

The rest of them,except perhaps the cheeky, strong-minded Soham, get on my nerves big time. I never really liked Purvi, with her sanctimonious preaching about middle class sanskaars (all of which were thrown to the winds in that dirty wet shack, ugh. You will probably think I am a dinosaur, but you can have no idea how let down I felt when the truth came out. I had believed, and asserted, right till the end that Purvi could never betray her upbringing like that.). But now I cannot stand her, and the way she relentlessly uses the men - whether Arjun then and now, or Onir now - who have had the misfortune to love her more than they love themselves.

How can Purvi not spare a single thought to the likely wreckage of Onir's entire professional life - and a highly respected one - because of her folly in pushing him to make the baby swap? Agreed, he was seriously at fault there, just as Arjun was on that hilltop. But this does not lessen her sheer lack of consideration and caring for a man to whom she owes more than she can possibly repay. What do you think would have been her fate as an unwed mother in Kolkata if he had not been there to lend her respectability by marrying her, with her illegitimate baby? How many men will do that?

I cannot accept the way in which Purvi uses people who care for her. As I wrote once, for her there are only 2 categories of persons: those for whom she will do anything - her mother, her aaji, her Manav baba, Ovi, Soham, and perhaps Teju - and those to whom she will do anything to protect the interests of the first group - and that is the two I like best, Arjun and Onir. Not an admirable character at all.

But what else can you expect if a girl is told, day in and day out, that she can do no wrong? I was shellshocked at Onir's blind folly in not just accepting, but actively endorsing her pre-marital affair, her baby, and the baby swap. Archana was the same way with Purvi earlier. She is not around, but I would be interested in seeing the reactions of Sulochana and Manav to the revelations about Pari's parentage, given their blind endorsement of Purvi's sanskaars.

I am sorry if I sound too harsh, but I can never forgive Purvi for what she has done to my poor, deluded Arjun. He was like a lamb led to the slaughter and she sacrificed him without a qualm. I never believed that she loved him as much as he loved her,. and I was proved right, alas! Plus I do not like do-gooders who try to play God with the lives of others., and turn a blind eye to the collateral damage, in this case Arjun and Onir.

I do not care who slaps whom, but seeking the death of anyone is, for me, beyond the pale. But don't worry, sweetheart, the supporters of Arjun and Purvi far, far outnumber the others, and so I was a tad suprised by your lament about being in a minority. As for me, I am no one's fan, and I write what I feel, with the inevitable result that neither side likes me!😉

Lastly, one cannot expect a woman who has just learnt that the baby she loves so much is not just not hers, but is the love child of her husband and his beloved, to be rational in her reaction to even a hand of genuine affection and support. A hurt puppy will bare its teeth and snarl at you even if you approach it to ease its suffering. I do believe that Ovi has changed, and I did not see her backing away angrily from Soham as an instance of recidivism.

She is not a little girl made of sugar and spice, is Ovi. As I noted earlier, I have been very sharp in my criticism of her in the past. But I believe firmly in what is owed to a marriage and to the children of that marriage. So Arjun's continuing to moon after Purvi, and his sudden excessive affection for Pari only after he learns that she is Purvi's child, and even more so his total disregard of his own dead child (he has a fleeting thought about it only once, and very late ) make me, to be frank, feel sick. So now I feel that Ovi is, at present, more sinned against than sinning.

Take care, my dear new niece, and if you can see this evening's proceedings as unintended comedy, you will be able to enjoy them! My prediction,. for what it is worth, is that it will all be a damp squib.

Shyamala Aunty

PS: If it is ok with you, please let me have your real name. Your id, though,is very intriguing!

Originally posted by archis_infinity

Dear Shyamala Aunty, Hope I can call you that as you are the much revered aunty on the forum. I am quite new in responding in this forum but have been a silent reader for a long time; I have had the privilege of reading and enjoying many of your posts before.

I will be honest upfront with you that I am an ARVI/PURVI fan but it pains me to no extent to step on to this forum these days. There is much more contempt and name calling for Purvi (and Arjun to a lesser extent) in the forum than any one else.

As far as Ovi is concerned, I agree that she is growing up from where she was an year back but she cannot fully grow up if all the issues of her life are always others fault (esp ARVI) than her own. She feels she has everything in her life (till yesterday's episode) but she still slips back to her old selfish self now and then. But what has Arjun and Purvi done post marraige to earn any of Ovi's contempt?

After the infamous deal, Purvi and Arjun have born the cross of burying the love in their hearts and tried to move on. I am equally blaming everyone for the consequence of their stupid decisions but no one can deny the deep pain that Arjun and Purvi had to endure to be seperate from each other and trying to move on with their partners.

While all of Ovi's past and present issues are being forgiven, ARVI don't get the same treatment. ARVI are not humans and their existence is purely to make OVI's life happy and contended. Ovi in the show doesn't know that Arjun and Purvi were intimate before Ovi/Arjun's marraige but the forum members do.

It amuses me that there are many in the forum right now rejoicing on the fact that Purvi will be slapped in today's episode and Onir/Arjun will be shamed. I would not be surprised if there is betting or speculation on how many "thappads" Purvi will be receiving.

Originally posted by sashashyam

Dear Nandini,

You are a professional in this field and I am merely an observer, but even for you, there is no way of proving a negative and no way of deciding why any one person does what he or she does. Anyone can doubt anything, but that does not amount to proof.

In the case of Ovi, there is such a relentless determination in large chunks of the forum to hate her that informed and balanced discourse goes out of the window. We even have members openly and unhesitatingly demanding that she should commit suicide and, in effect, approving of the death of her baby as well deserved punishment for Ovi.

Well, I have been a very trenchant critic of Ovi in the past, but now all I can say is that my heart goes out to her. Just as my blood boils when I read these ugly death wishes, which, the Mods have been kind enough to inform us today, are permissible so long as they do not amount to 'extreme violence", whatever that might be. Probably a menu card for ways of disposing of Ovi and, next, of Onir - by cutting them up into hundreds of pieces or having them run over by a tram?

I am also puzzled by the unremitting hostility towards Ovi, no matter that she has come a long way from her old self, whereas Soham/Vishnu, who is unquestionably guilty of verymuch more serious crimes like kidnapping and extortion, is accepted with open arms for having turned over a new leaf. Is it because women are soft on goodlooking young men, as someone explained it, whereas they are always very hard on one of their own gender? Especially someone presuming to diivide the anointed couple? Who, incidentally, seem to have no intention of seeking a punarmilan. Strange.

Shyamala B.Cowsik.

I sympathize with Ovi for her stillbirth and more importantly for fact she was never informed. Leaving this, is she really deserves pity?? For me its a NO, She deserves all this, precisely she called for all this. Being a psychologist i still doubt, Is she crying out of maternal love for child or for missing a "strong reason" that keeps her binded with A. And for many who feel, she lost child with JUST due to accident, plz she has a High Risk Pregency; Onir has done further damage control. It makes no sense to me, Why she is holding onto a loveless marriage??

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Shyamala, I saw your name and asked, "is it Grundsaudaag?" 😆That is how excited I get when I see your posts these days, they are so few and far between. Had to say peace out because I was getting weary of repeating myself a myriad times over.

Very interesting question there, why the differential treatment for Soham? I will bravely venture to take a shot in the dark and conjecture why there could be this alleged leniency towards Soham.

Viewers have seen Soham as a baby much more than they have seen Ovi, there is a an anxiety and an attachment to the baby that was kidnapped and removed from his parents so rudely. He is bad, my ladla, but he was raised such by his maayi and Balan. His fate was doomed, sealed when Varsha ran away with him, he is illiterate, is a goon but still exhibits utmost respect for his "mother" and "father". His bad deeds are only hearsay, they do not make as much of an impact because we do not directly see them. What we did see, his kidnapping of Purvi, turned in his favor because he was within limited means a gentleman (in that he did not manhandle her) and "nice" (for lack of a better word" to her. When he met Archana and took her ashirwad, there was a genuineness about him, he did not know who she was, he was pulled to her every time he saw her, in court, outside, it was palpable. He was ready to acknowledge thanks to Purvi when she did not point him out to the cops in the purse lifting case. He was chivalrous enough to fight the goondas off Purvi when she was accosted by them on the road. His remorse on shooting his Aai was sincere, his anguish for Ovi was touching, he seems to care for both his sisters (and his family) without any ulterior motive. His being easy on the eye and most viewers being female might be an added factor as you say.

Coming to Ovi (not bashing here, just the facts as I see them), she is portrayed as a selfish, girl whose only goal in life is Arjun, she seems to have no care for anyone else. Remember her first visit to the chawl and the K house and her hoity toity behavior? Remember her requiring Archana to ma'am her, this when she had no reason to hate Archana (she was unaware that the lady was her Aai), her sharp reprimand when Archana addressed her as Ovi once, her high-handedness when it came to Purvi, Punni, the office staff, asking Archana to procure food for her even. The character was not portrayed in a likeable fashion at all. Then her harkaths with Purvi, the check giving, the drinking when pregnant, and the insolent behavior even after her marriage, the baby pooja incident where she accused Purvi of theft and her continued drinking to that day all left behind a sour taste. Once a viewer develops a partiality or a bias it is hard to change that unless there is a total about face. Ovi was turning a new leaf in the last few weeks, she was beginning to get likeable but the CVs may have thrown a monkey wrench into that transformation process if stories of her disappearing for a while are to be believed. No fault of the actress, she is doing a marvelous job depicting her lost soul and betrayal, I feel for her too.

There, Shyamala, I have answered your question to the best of my ability😉

Originally posted by: archis_infinity

Shyamala Aunty, I took the liberty of replying to you in this thread for the simple reason that I could not spend time to find the previous thread where I responded. You see, I do not spend a lot of time in the forum and I find there are many threads on similar topic !! I thank you for taking in yet another niece from the forum , I am much honored though I do confess that I am that young as I may sound with the 'auntyji'. Well, there is a certain perception on the average age of the Arvi fan.😊

I am called Vasu at home and as background, I am originally from Chennai, have been living abroad for 17 years - all of it spent raising a family and being a hardcore professional in a global firm. Though I can manage a smattering of hindi, this is the first soap I have watched and that too, only from Feb last year ,thanks to a friend who mentioned Arvi in a casual conversation. I got hooked, began to invest whatever time I get on the forum and watching the serial. To sum it all, this side of me is a surprise to my family and would definitely be a shock to my friends if they come to know about it.😃

My journey with Arvi has been like everyone else's. I now favour the two actors than of their characters. I do too though it may not sound like that the way I write about Arjun! 😉It would be quite distasteful to me for Arvi to reunite in their current condition totally agree but deep down in my heart, I am hoping some "twists and turns" in future would justify the means and the end !

Without boring you or anyone kind enough to read my rants, I do not justify every act of Purvi , Arjun, Soham in the same way I do with Ovi. And I may be the only person in the forum who don't see Purvi's act of giving up Arjun as her loving him less . I firmly believe there are different shades of love ; I have personal experiences in my own friends circle on how two soul-mates decide not to enter marraige-hood for the sake of their family. Agree but unfortunately once the decision is made they have to live by it, no turning back. I can only imagine the torture they endure in the name of life with such scarred hearts but the decision had made sense to them at that point of their lives. The only difference in the soap is that it wasn't mutual decision at least not prior to the hilltop scene.

I do not judge the strength in anyone's character in their ability to take 'right' decisions , that is decisions that strictly confirm to the norms of the society but how they face the consequence of their decisions , control the damage and moving on. couldn't have said it better. For me, the differential factor is the intentions ('Karanam' ) and not always the actions ('Kariyam'). Motives are the deciding factor in determining if a person is good or evil but sometimes the way to hell is paved with good intentions.

On your specific points about Ovi's current plight on the truth of Pari, I had written earlier this week

in the forum that this is a horror for any woman. And on Arjun's reaction on baby Pari, I felt that that was momentary reaction on the overwhelming odds on how Pari survived given how she was conceived, Purvi leaving the town and had to endure till that point of time. Remember how grateful he sounded to Ovi when she stopped drinking and started caring for herself and the baby, though this would be the normal expectation from any husband?I may be wrong but I haven't seen him behaving with the baby any more or any less affectionate than before.I have said the same, he thanked Ovi for his lady luck, Pari even before he knew she was Purvi's. He might have been kissing her because even though he lost his other baby, God has given him another baby to cherish no matter whose it is, Ovi's or Purvi's.

I enjoyed my first venture in the forum of putting my thoughts into words and sorry again for the length of the mail. Loved reading your thoughts. I hope we will continue our interaction in the coming days and weeks. Take care.

p.s: On the user name, it is actually an anagram of names but there is also a meaning on what 'archis' means.

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Shyamala, no particular significance for groundhog day here since it is eternal spring in Cali as Sasha will probably tell you! 😉 And it is German to be precise, will tell you the story behind the usage later.

Never fear, Soham is well on the way to earning everyone's ire as he is all set to harbor the evil Dr. Onir and his sultry siren Mishti!😆 Ovi might be a moot point if the rumors are to be believed that she will soon be absconding!

I loved the the Dhundhle Rang post as well and very much for the same reasons as you. At least this darn tale keeps us coming back to the forum, dunno what I would do without my daily dose of PR, has kind of become like my hot kappi!

Happy Tamil New Year to you or should I say Puthandu Vazthukal?