Star Of The Day : 4th Jan 2011 - Page 18

Originally posted by: nikitagmc

@Tanya Di: At the moment I don't see it happening. Once again, I'm not angry with anyone, but I'm certainly shocked with everything. Its been almost two years on this forum and something like this has never happened. In other forums, debate threads get closed up bcos people fight too badly... here its ulta... people want to trash a healthy debate.

@Saffy:::: It may have been a joke Saffy, but if its a joke between you and Jaanu, then Jaanu should be more clear na about how she says it... and this I'm saying with due respect to Janu, cos she's elder to me.... it did not sound like a joke to me at all... I was actually horrified cos nobody ever said anything like that ever before in this whole forum. Why not say in simple words that leave all this, come and have fun??? Would we have disagreed?

See now- that healthy debate has gone with the wind. The whole atmosphere became so tensed

Jaanu dear, if it was a joke, then I request you to be more direct next time, and I say this from the bottom of my heart.

Enough of this serious discussion. Lets bury the hatchet here. Continue discussing Manav's chest. sorry I can't come, would have loved too, but I need to study some more. Good night people.

Originally posted by: koolsadhu1000

Never mind saffy , even in ROTW there were comments about wanting to meet mind googling etc ...........why , coz he dared to oppose the horrible Kools or something I suppose ? I had ignored even then . Actually he and I made up that day itself it was simple misunderstanding but I found jaanu commenting unecessarily on it . I didnt say a single word . Today too I found such comments . . Never mind , I have nothing against u . But once I speak , I speak out everything . Bye for now , I hope this topic ends here .

Originally posted by: nikitagmc

@Saffy:::: It may have been a joke Saffy, but if its a joke between you and Jaanu, then Jaanu should be more clear na about how she says it... and this I'm saying with due respect to Janu, cos she's elder to me.... it did not sound like a joke to me at all... I was actually horrified cos nobody ever said anything like that ever before in this whole forum. Why not say in simple words that leave all this, come and have fun??? Would we have disagreed?

@Saffy: As I said earlier too saffy, I was shocked by the WAY Janu said it... especially cos everything was going in such a healthy manner. There was no sarcasm and no fights.

You say it was a joke, then maybe I'm not used to such type of jokes, cos I didn't find an ounce of humour in it. And I really couldn't understand when she asked us to joke. That is why I said her post was really not clear, at least to me.

And anyway, I did exactly what she said-- I dropped the whole issue long ago figuring that people are not interested or getting 'bugged up' as she said. I took her advice. You drop it too. Relax. All is well. 😊

@Saffy: Thankyou for your well meaning advise Saffy, but even though younger, I would like to request Jaanu to please come clear with what she wants to say next time instead of putting up things in a way only you can understand.

As for the horrible sin part is concerned- go read Janu's post again--- I have no wish to 'accuse' people of anything. She only said that we have gone insane and are not doing healthy discussion and putting our personal examples and bugging her whereas I was simply putting up my opinion. It was she who said she cannot stand all this and logged out, and I felt shocked and guilty.

I have never had any wish to fight with anyone ever in the forum Saffy, in fact I always say sorry first and back out whenever I see trouble brewing, and this time too I did not accuse anyone of anything. I just read her post and reacted accordingly-- she said she is getting bugged, so I said okay I'll not write anything more and quietly logged off. I did not even write anything rude or bad about her, so what are you advising me for???

Now if you want to joke and laugh about it, fine. From the beginning I have been saying that I am not angry, I am not angry.. honestly I cannot understand where I have gone wrong that everyone is trying to explain me only.

I rest my case. Don't want to continue this matter at all. Where Manav and solutions is concerned, I disagree with you again Saffy, but now I have no wish to continue the discussion.

Originally posted by: SaffyFlower

Niki,KoolDi and any others - she and many others have posted bfor also that - it is their world view that they see no fun in arguing about a show when one can make funny comments.So when they see arguments,they try to get us to let go of it ,that is all.

Pls understand that their intention is not trash anybody's rights to debate.

Niki it was a serious comment from her asking us to joke instead of debate,if you did not understand my post.

Fifi has asked me to stop arguing too bfor.Hope has done it in the COmmentary when we had an absolutely normal heated debate.If ppl like Fifi and Jaanu are asking us to go light on a debate sometimes,I see something positive and constructive in their outlook.Whether they address me or you or anybody else.Why take it as negative criticism?

And as each one of us have a different philosophy of life,each one of us definitely have a bias.Why take it as a negative criticism?

I see much ado about nothing Niki.

I did not want to step into this very interesting dialogue but considering my name was taken as indicated in bold above I thought it was necessary to say something to the above.

to begin with let me do mind googling's job.

this is what I really said.

Kools, your thread and this forum seems to have become very heated and divided over Archu and Dharmesh.

I saw your point of view and the opposing and I wanted to drop my two cents in but I seriously am hesitant.

the atmosphere in the entire forum seems to be toxic. I have heard more subjective arguments than objective ones and i am afraid my POV will not help. So I will refrain. I know it appears cowardly but today for the first time I felt the light heartedness surrounding our debates is vanishing and we are taking Archu's defence and Dharmesh's prosecution at a very personal level.

Tanyadi:

we are all friends here, in my opinion. some steadfast and some casual.

yet today I saw a tone in many posts that was tactfully put "unfriendly"

If this is what a show can do to friends then who needs the show or the debate?

And to make sure that my comments and intent above are not being interpreted or misinterpreted - my post did not ask people NOT to debate and rather make funny comments (I offered no instructions just posted a rhetorical question - I am nobody to ask any forum member to debate or not debate etc. - it is an open and public venue). My point was when debating we should not use hidden sarcasm or blunt rudeness to make a point. I have even seen character attacks on other forum members done in a very subtle manner (with laughing faces and a lot of smiley faces) while debating. I like debating - why would I tell people to stop debating?

Just so that I am not misused as a precedent for a post such as the one that has caused such a furor here.

I stand by what I wrote then - our comments should be objective and the tone of our posts friendly otherwise the fun of watching the show and then debating is lost.

Oh and by the way, the debate you mentioned was not normal - there was a lot of hidden sarcasm and barbs that was apparent to someone not participating in that particular debate itself. If it was a normal heated debate I would have jumped right in.