Ashamed of Archu's family - Page 2

Originally posted by: vishwap

Agree with you. Finding it very difficult to comment these days.

Archana has seen many tragedies. But the biggest tragedy for her is that her family and so-called well-wishers are forcing her into a relationship for which she is not ready yet, ignoring her obvious distress. How can they claim to love her? It is as though they are in a hurry to get her off their hands !

What society are they talking about. If Shravani's undefined status is acceptable, why not Archana's divorced one?

Why cant she simply be gievn time to recover and recoup? What is the hurry?

Due to this this one act of theirs, she has once again lost her confidence and identity. She may be foolish, impractical and impulsive but no one can take away her natural goodness from her. For that alone, she certainly deserves much better support !

@Vidyasu,

Your balanced views have the exceptional advantage of a writing hand which imports them with lucidity, relevance and eloquence- not quite common. This also points to a very astute mind with a strong bent towards the justice and fairness. As such it saddens me to read your last post.

Because I have no right to advise you, I can merely observe this; vidyasu, Kool has not done anything wrong to merit inducement of such a protest (just as sometimes we are freely posting our own disagreement in the Koolsadhu's thread). Please don't take any argument so personally (which are not personal) and deprive us of your engaging views. I think more constructive would be to debate, or even counter, the views in disagreements, with vigour and spirit. As said earlier, I don't have any right to advise or lecture, I can only request to consider.

In betw'n to share my experience; As when I become too fed up with taxing involvement, I take up a voluntary break and return when or if, I feel like.

The Karanjkars are a confused bunch. They want the best for Archana and assume the best is her remarriage. The problem is there is a huge disconnect from what they want for her and what she is clearly happy with.

If they genuinely want to see her happy, how come none of them ever asks Manav if he cares enough to kill all the roadside romeos for her, why did he divorce her? They are always after Archana for answers. She is very clearly still in love with the guy but cant marry him coz he WONT marry her. So, there isnt much she can do can she.

All middleclass Indian families perceive a daughter is better off married with a kid or two than all alone with a smashing career. This is a fact and I am sure the Karanjkars are no different here. Where they are wrong according to me is they never stood up for her when her first marriage was crumbling all around her. All of them accepted Manav's ill adviced decision with no opposition and they are fooling themselves now that Archana is ready to move on when she clearly is kicking and screaming otherwise.

My two cents are : the only person to blame for all of Archana's miseries post marriage is Manav. Had he been half a husband that Vinod is to Manju and we wouldnt see the poor girl in such a miserable situation.

Going by the script- at present, on three counts they are dubious w.r.t. Archana or her welfare;

1. Allowing Dharmesh's perverse attack go reproach less, let alone insisting on a counter apology for his loose behavior. In a civilized family, a SIL can not have such license.

2. Even more dangerously, they let go the fraud of a fiance with out even a whimper, not giving any real thought to the morals of a creep under the condonance of 'itna bhi bura nahi he..'. More concerned parent would surely weigh the prospects or dangers to a normal married life with such a person.

3. Suffering and submitting meekly to 'not- so- infrequent' dictates of a future MIL even before the marriage, not giving any thought- into what kind of poisonous, autocratic environ, full of suspicions, their daughter is heading to.

But I can not see them as a family to be ashamed of. They are merely weak- for all the claims to a moralistic value system of a sound middleclass.

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

Nikita, smrth, many thanks. I agree that the leads have become parodies of themselves. Lately they have both been made to look so neurotic that even their supporters are discomfited. As smrth says, I think the whole idea is to demean them so much that the others look elevated by comparison. It is quite horrible how Archana's family has been portrayed as perfectly reasonable, loving and caring while she has been made to appear illogical, self-destructive and mule-headed. The CVs have pulled this off so cleverly that not many have noticed the harm the family is doing to the daughter. The family hasn't said a word about Dharmesh's boorish behaviour or his criminal inclinations, instead they have happily bought all the bullshit talk about saving the factory and saving the thousands of workers. How easily Dharmesh has gotten on to the moral high ground, talking about loyal workers not getting increment while trouble-maker Manav has been treated with kid gloves and showered with favours. Kid gloves? Favours?. Is spending time in prison a favour? Dharmesh is so warped, so openly and deliberately horrible, yet archana's family cannot see it at all, going on and on about Dharmesh beta. And is it Manav's exclusive right to be slapped? Archana slapped him, even if unwillingly. Sulochana slapped him in full view of his neighbourhood without even bothering to find out if he was guilty or not. Yet she flies into a rage over her daughter slapping the ghar ka daamaad who has sent an innocent man to the gallows. The moral of the story: If you are a rich damaad, you can literally get away with murder, the family will still love you and work itself into insane rage if you are slapped. If you are a poor damaad, you can be put into jail, slapped, shouted at generally treated like dirt.

Originally posted by: koolsadhu1000

My two cents ................

About being 'ashamed' of Archana's family ...............Society in Dombivli .........traditional marathi society is like this only . Gossip prone , paying more attention to customs rather than the values propogating them , praising political correctness rather than truth . . Its not easy to survive in this society by being the odd one out . This Society will not accept 'Good friends after divorce' at all . Even if some do upwardly , there will be a lot of snickering behind the back . So if Archna and Manav expect their 'Pavitra Rishta' to be accepted , they r in for a rude shock , and thats exactly what is being shown . When u r in Rome , behave as the romans do , is the diktat of the world , not just Dombivlites . . Sulochana is a limited woman . She is a part of that society . She knows only two ways of survival .......getting daughters married and hanging on to the son even if bahu doesn't want her . My own mother is exactly like this . Judging these mothers as bad and calling them villains is not entirely correct . They r simply surviving within That social framework , thats all . These mothers educate daughters , see them getting jobs and then start planning for their marraige . Its very rare that u find a mother who educates daughter , sees her doing job and says Oh Ok , U don't wanna marry na , Ok . I respect ur decision .My blessings to u for remaining single . Do we honestly see such mothers in that society ? . If u can , see it from Sulochnas POV . Other two daughters nicely married off and happy , so is son . When she and Manohar die , Archana will have to make a home with her bro and his bitchy wife , looking after their kids ..............what a horrible future .She will grow into an old maid bearing Manju's taunts and not really having anything of her own ....everything will be Manju's . 90% of spinsters live like this with bros and bhabhis and we all know their fate . Is Sulo so wrong in wanting her re settled ? . So she agreed to look into the proposal that Dharmesh brought her . But the daughter is fixated on her ex .......Manav , who is a 'good man' but not really giving her any hope as such . In fact the good man is moving on in life by marrying HIS fiancee . . But daughter is saying , I will live with his mEMORIES . Which mom on earth will accept this ? To all those blaming sulo , look at your moms and ask urself if u had given this answer to ur mom in this very same condition , wud she have agreed ? . I didn't see Sulo denying Manav's goodness . I see her taking a resigned attitude that Ok , he is good , but whats the use ? He is marrying someone else ! But what about my daughter ? . I have two daughters of my own . I wud worry EXACTLY in the same way .If even one daughter wud tell me of some PAVITRA RISHTA , I wud say Pavitra Rishta my foot , now u sit here and LISTEN to me . . Seeing that Daughter is just not listening she told Manav to convince her as Archana only listened to Manav . I have argued with saffy that its not really Manavs place to convince Archu to marry , blaming Manav here and laying guilt trip on him is wrong . Saffy said that from mothers POV , Sulo is not so wrong . Perhaps Saffy is right . If u leave the rectitude part out of it , all she is asking is her daughter to move on too . . Manav cud have refused Sulochana. I am sorry , I wont go and force Archu . She has done enough for me , this is HER decision . Let world call me selfish , I wont do it . But He did it AFTER LISTENING TO SAVITA . Not just SUlochana , mind u . ALWAYS , it has been the weakness of this character that he listens to his MOTHER .Savita reiterated Sulochnas worry and justified it . That affected Manav deeply and he went and emotionally blackmailed Archu into marrying Jaywant Rane . . By that time Sulochna had ACTUALLY listened to Archus decision grudgingly and RETREATED . . Archana refused to listen to manav at first . What did our hero do ? . I won't marry Shravni till u do so , he said , knowing exactly where to twist the knife . .

Two days later , Shravni pays a visit , blasts Archna and informs her manav is REALLY not marrying her after making her wait for two years as his condition his ......Archana shud get married FIRST .

Hearing that , Archna realises that Manav is actually acting upon his threat . He is REALLY not marrying Shravni . She buckles and goes straight to Jays house and asks him if his proposal still stands .

Actually Sulochna has retreated by now , so had Jaywant after archnas refusal .

So who took the decision and why ?

Did Archu take it for her old moms sake ? Or for Manavs sake ?

Neither did Archna take this decision for Sulo nor coz she was afraid of Shravnis curses . She understood that Manav is really not marrying Shravni thru Shravnis tirade and that affected her .Manav knew where to hit emotionally to get what he wanted .

We don't see Manav even considering that Archnas choice in marraige is important , forcing her this way is just not done . He cud have gone to sulo and told I talked to her , she is just not listening .He didnt do that .He FORCED her hand .

Manav has pretty antiquated ideas for a young man doesn't he ? He actually went to Jay and told him Archna is STILL PURE coz she is still a VIRGIN .

Before saying Manohar and sulo r the antiquated ones ..........see what Manav is . To save Shravnis honor he took away Archnas honor by reducing her from married woman to other woman , then went and forced her into remarraige , then went and told her fiancee she is pure coz she is virgin . This is the POOR Manav whom u all r defending by blasting Sulochana.

After initial maraige misunderstandings ...........created by Manav's mom btw [ lying her son is engineer and what not and doing horrible dowry demands] Sulochna , to her credit had given the marraige a chance . Even before divorce she had invited this coupl;e for lunch ad repeatedly prayed to them NOT to divorce . They dID NOT LISTEN . Coz they were interested in SAINTHOOD .

They actually wanted to be the PATRON SAINTS of DOMBIVLI .

before glorifying the leads and bashing other characters who are shown as pretty real and looking out for themselves and uninterested in sainthood , See what Manav Archna did . The other characters r IMPERFECT HUMANS .Manav Archna r HUMANS TRYING TO BE SAINTS . And we all know what happens to saints , don't we ? Read their live stories and see the suffering they undergo . And Thats precisely watz being shown in this serial .

i just loved ur post kuldi,totally agree wid each and everyting if i wld hav a adaughter or sister like archana wld hav broke all relatios wid her,but still her parents r so worried for her.

Bonny I agree with your post .My views exactly .

.But the end bottom line is .............Divorcing was Archnas decision [ she did not listen to her mom]

Marrying Jaywant is hers again [ Sulo had retreated]

Resigning from job is again HERS [ She disregarded Satishs correct advice]

Burning hand , thinking she Violated her spiritual marraige and ABUSED her god is again hers . Her so called STUPID mom was not even aware of her doings .

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

sereaishitedare (don't know how to pronounce this name!!), I AGREE, AGREE with all your points. The only reason Archana's family is pushing her into this marriage is because jaywant is willing to accept her with her ateet. It is so disgusting; it is as if a great favour is being done to her. Even Manav said this crap, and her dad's bedside lecture was all about J may be bad, but not so bad because he is willing to accept you. YOU with YOUR PAST. Is she some soiled goods? How can CVs plug this line in the 21st century?. I live on my own and believe me I am having a whale of a time. I'm not against marriage but it must happen because you have found someone you want to marry not because you have to marry, so find someone, anyone. Right now archu looks like a lamb being led to the slaughter house and her mother is tittering on about how good her fiance is and what a wonderful life she will have etc. etc.. In the same breath she will say that no one knows her daughter as well as her. I bet she will want a full tamasha wedding with all the rituals and the works, not even allowing her grieving daughter the courtesy of opting for a simple court marriage. And yeah, you can also bet that the sisters will come dressed like christmas trees, giggling and going on about the honewale jeeju ( I feel like puking when they say this), completely oblivous to archu's pain and suffering. Can't bear to watch all this. Nor can I understand the drooling sympathy for the family on the forum.

Don't mean to annoy anyone.