Minnie's Father, From Ashok to HS - Page 7

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Me too! PARTY hogi forum mein if they ever give us that scene.....we'll all be delirious with joy😆

Sach mein, aur Twitter pe to yeh trending hi hoga!

Originally posted by: tk2015

Thank you!

Once bitten, twice shy. She was never taught or hasn't learnt to have expectations from anyone or anything. She was so pleasantly surprised each time HS or Mickey has understood her.

Why do you think she attached herself so immediately to HS and NB? I'm sure she was floored by the maturity these elders were showing, having never seen anything of the sort before.

She truly has retracted into her shell now. That analogy is perfect. I hope this is shown to be a learning curve for her. There's no clear divide between sensible/responsible adults and those on the other side.

HS can falter and Babes can be trusted to make her own decisions. Minnie doesn't have to love them any less or believe in them any less for it.

Edit: also, I think what hurt Minnie the most was that he never followed up with her regarding the CD. He only trusted her once the proof was in his hand.

Which makes no sense character wise, pehle toh. 🤔

But anyway, remember HS shrugging off Minnie after the appendicitis track and her not letting go? I was hoping for a similar kind of apology. Yes, the GP was beautiful, but sit and have a conversation, please.

@bold, this is it. She expected him to have the blind trust in her that she had shown during the Imarti track, but if you think about it, she had seen him do nothing but good things for them both, so she was able to stand by him with no doubt about his innocence.

We can also ask, what has she done to show him she is his daughter, that he can trust her blindly, but the fact is that she (and we) would have preferred him to trust her without needing proof and to at least talk about what happened. It was contrived for the sake of drama, we'll just have to live with it. I would have preferred there to be a more natural reason for their divide, not this out of character thing.

All said and done, HS and NB are still way better than any of the adults she knows.

Oh yeah, the way she wouldn't let go, I want her to get a big hug from him where he doesn't let go either until she voices her concerns and bares her soul about everything she is struggling with. I was really disappointed with the handshake instead of the hugs on her birthday, but oh well.

She really needs his support right now.

Originally posted by: Sakurablossom

Yeah but according to HS it was all a drama for babita. Writers ruined some really genuine moments of past to justify current track.

No, calling her his daughter was to reassure Babita and propose to her indirectly, but that doesn't have to be weighed against his love for Minnie. He said so himself.

Yes, they ruined some stuff, as if to rewrite history. Hum bhi dheet hain, bhoolenge nahin.

Originally posted by: inlieu

I did love it, and you thinking about me is just Awwwwww 🤗

I am glad someone else agrees with what I've been saying that he is a newborn father too. He will learn, just as she has to learn to become a daughter, organically.

Minnie set the bar so high that seeing imperfections in him made him immediately 'fall from grace' in her eyes, but things aren't binary. He can be imperfect as a human being but still be the perfect one to be her father. She has a lot to learn about relationships.

Yes, she broke his trust and as he said to Babita - bohot takleef hui, par it's ok. Part of that came out in his pained conversation with her during the CD fiasco - he reminded her of that incident. The feeling of rejection on both sides is palpable and it's such a shame that they both adore each other but are insecure to the point of not wanting to hope again. She also needs to forgive him the way she seems to have forgiven everyone else around.

I don't want HS to be complacent, I want him to for once fight to keep her in his life, haq se treat her like a daughter and shower her with all the paternal love that he never got as a kid. He has all the right ingredients anyway.

I just thought of something. You remember when he was telling Minnie about his childhood and how at one point he said 'zabaan pe taala lag gaya, kuch bol na paya'? Exactly that has happened to him again, which is why he seems unable to go past his mental block of his.

Anyway, I don't think he should be the only one to try to make this work but as the parent I want him to ease up and step up.

I agree with everything you said except the part in bold. The part about Zubaan pe tala is on point.

@bold: I might be the only person who doesn't want this. Please don't bunch him with everyone else. She needs to voice out her disappointments and hurt with him, unlike what she does with everyone else.

It shouldn't be a given that he'll be forgiven just because she has forgiven everyone else around her. Only because he isn't everyone else for her, he's so very special. She just needs to learn to speak her feelings with him.

I think Gur had mentioned this episode 107 a couple of days back but I finally managed to get around to rewatching it......sach mein, the equations were so beautifully balanced......

Even if Mini-Babita fought, it didn't get as ugly as it's gotten off late.....and HS had the courage to objectively give advice to Babita about Mini without being defensive or frustrated himself.....and end mein, he also felt the courage to himself try to patch up mother-daughter....yeh nahin ki side mein baith ke observer banaa rahe.

Babita was headstrong back then also and didn't automatically agree with any advice HS gave her....she didn't always get everything he was trying to say....but she didn't taunt him like she does now either.

Saara taana baana shaadi ki wajah se hi ulat gaya hai.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQJzAhFbudk

Originally posted by: tk2015

I agree with everything you said except the part in bold. The part about Zubaan pe tala is on point.

@bold: I might be the only person who doesn't want this. Please don't bunch him with everyone else. She needs to voice out her disappointments and hurt with him, unlike what she does with everyone else.

It shouldn't be a given that he'll be forgiven just because she has forgiven everyone else around her. Only because he isn't everyone else for her, he's so very special. She just needs to learn to speak her feelings with him.

I don't mean he gets a free pass, I just mean that eventually she should forgive him after all the conversations and mann-mutao are sorted out. I think she wants to, but can't.

The GP scene proved just how special he is, but he doesn't know or feel that he is that special to her. HS ne to bol diya Minnie ko ke woh uske jigar ka tuda hai, but what is he to her and why does she have these expectations, why is she afraid to talk about them, etc.

Originally posted by: inlieu

I don't mean he gets a free pass, I just mean that eventually she should forgive him after all the conversations and mann-mutao are sorted out. I think she wants to, but can't.

The GP scene proved just how special he is, but he doesn't know or feel that he is that special to her. HS ne to bold diya Minnie ko ke woh uske jigar ka tuda hai, but what is he to her and why does she have these expectations, why is she afraid to talk about them, etc.

Originally posted by: tk2015

Minnie has never felt the love of a father before HS. Yes, she had dadu and Sukhi as father-figures, but that was mostly materialistic.

In the sense that while they provided her with tangible and other amenities, they never tried to understand her or help her emotionally.

Did they ever speak to Ashok about shifting home or taking Minnie along because his daughter needs him?

Leave that, did they ever try to maintain conversation between them via phones etc? As far as I remember, Ashok didn't even remember how old his own frigging daughter was.

All her wishes were heard and fulfilled, but nobody actually paid close attention to her emotional well-being. No wonder she's a control freak and has to have things done her way. That was a form of overcompensation from her family. To coddle her enough to make up for the absentee father.

Then HS came into her life. Strict and a disciplinarian, but andar se mom ki tarah soft. She expected a slap on the wrist for beating Khatri and was defensive.

What she got instead was a beautiful soul taking one look at her and understanding what exactly had gone down. He didn't give her a free pass. He tried to make her understand that violence isn't the answer, but he also understood her emotions.

He has been able to see her for who she is, not as a daughter or grand daughter, etc., but as a person. This was something lacking from her life before. All her friends and family had put her in a mould that she couldn't seem to grow out of. HS saw her as a troubled child and held out a hand to help.

HS involved himself in her life. He didn't sit back and expect her to manage things because it's Minnie (like others do). He went a step ahead and started helping her out at an age where she needed the guidance most.

It's funny that Minnie went with her mother for job application, whereas Babes didn't accompany Minnie for the college admission. No wonder this girl is headstrong and wants to be a part of all decisions, because she's been brought up that way. She only knows how to be like that.

Hannie's relationship hasn't grown to the point which most of us had hoped. Right now, it's tentative at best. Even if they're a team now, it's to tackle Babes and nothing else.

If at some point, HS and Minnie don't truly grow into the roles of father-daughter or something close, Minnie would feel the effects of that her entire life. She would grow resentful.

She has gotten a taste of what having a mentor around is like. She has gotten a taste of being pampered and loved while simultaneously learning so much from HS.

Even if she doesn't realise it or comprehend it, she needs HS in her life and as a father.

These thoughts were swirling around in my head, so I just decided to pen them down.

Originally posted by: AreYaar

So beautifully written....you've captured the essence of HS-Mini so wonderfully👏....especially these lines in bold :) Word to everything.

HS is special for Mini because for the first time in her life, someone saw her as a PERSON....TRULY understood her emotions without mollycoddling them or appeasing them. She's such a headstrong girl but no one, not even the mom she's so close to truly seemed to know how to handle how sensitive she is inside.....HS was the first person in her life to connect to that sensitivity....because so much of it is similar to his own.

HS-Mini are kindered spirits.....before any other role, any other equation....that is what they are....kindered spirits who just found each other with a stroke of destiny....and then there was no looking back. The reason he understands her emotions is because somewhere they are his own....he struggles with the same things....feeling too much, wanting to fight the world for his loved ones, the anger issues.....but he's worked through these issues over time....that is why he knows how to guide her there too.

You make a great point about how HS involved himself in her life and didn't just do what everyone else does....get steamrolled by Mini's strong personality and sit back and let her manage as she wants to.....sometimes all that strength hides a whole lot of vulnerability.....Mini's case is like that. And HS was the first person in her life to get that......until Mickey showed up and took over....lol

I wish we could get back that HS who GOT his Veer Balika like no other.....sigh.

As for the father-daughter aspect....yes, if they never manage to work their way towards that equation, there will be an emptiness inside both of them.....yeh rishta adhura rehne ke liye nahin banaa hai. With some relationships, you can say that iski limit bas yahin tak thi.....there cannot be anything more....and that's fine.....all relationships don't need a label, a definition to be meaningful.

But with these two, it's obvious that that was the natural course they were on.....they gravitated towards it naturally....given the magnitude of emotion they feel for each other, they will never be truly content or happy in life without reaching that fulfillment in being the father-daughter they are meant to me.....it will fill an emptiness inside them that Babita alone can never make up for....only these two can do it for each other.

I agree with each and every word. Being strong and brave all the time comes with its own set of side effects. You can get so so tired of this and you won't even know how to break out of it.

Exactly! HS has been through so much that he can guide Minnie along her journey and it'll be so beautiful to watch. They are joined by that dard ka rishta before anything else.

These two can be so much more than what they are right now. You're right about them not reaching their limit yet. And Babita can't even come to what this bond signifies to both of them.

@bold: God, yes, please!

Originally posted by: AreYaar

I want some more exploration of Mini's thoughts on Ashok as a father.

Babita mentioned in her ranting last week that for Mini's birthday, Ashok used to send her gift parcels.....we got to hear Babita's take on it....that Mini used to wait all day just for that gift parcel and none of the other gifts from her family mattered to her as much as the parcel from Ashok. So clearly she had some level of attachment to Ashok even if he was an absent father.

Then what are her thoughts now? Why are we never shown even a small glimpse? And now that HS has heard Babita mention this....can he initiate a conversation on his own with Mini about it to know her feelings?

Yes, I get it....Ashok ka topic is hard for HS to raise too....it's weird to talk about the man that caused so much pain to Mini and Babita.....but I still want to see these conversations happen.....I want to know what Mini's thoughts were for all those years about her father who's gifts she waited for.....if she also waited eagerly every year, where did those emotions go? Something has to be resolved there as well.

She's had the conversation with HS about how they will manage their relationship on their own without pressure to conform.....but they both need to start confiding in each other about their thoughts, emotions again as well. Mini used to share this with him before each time Ashok's nonsense left a fresh batch of wounds on her and Babita's psyche......I wish she would do it again.....and I want her to talk about her OWN pain vis a vis Ashok....not just Babita's. Come on, HS....Babita se toh baat kar li, Mini se bhi is topic pe baat karna zaroori hai.

SAME! I really want this facet explored. At this point I'm not even asking that she open up to anyone in particular. I just want a sneak peak into her emotions regarding Ashok especially.

And I want it to happen quickly. Sometimes when you let some time lapse after the incidents that hurt you, you get a distorted idea of them in your head.

I don't know if this makes sense. But unless you consciously think about your emotions regarding something nasty that took place or you talk about how you felt, sometimes you don't even remember yourself. You suppress and hide so much, you start believing your own lies.

It's already been a year and we haven't seen a single time when someone's walked up to her and asked her to voice out her emotions regarding her father. Yes, she never had a bond with him but it would've still hurt so much.