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Chapter 24
"We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls."? Anas Nin, The Diary of Anas Nin, Vol. 7: 1966-1974
Why are you here? why are you born to these parents, married to this husband and what is it that bought you to this junction ?.
Some are born somewhere and end up somewhere else in a different part of the world and live their lives not knowing why, what or who bought them here. Sometime's paths cross and we wonder what if we had met that person before or why we did not meet that person before ?. life, it seems is an equation that we constantly try to solve and see if we can come up with another answer via another formula.
From darkness into light
It had been raining steadily, heavily and the monsoon was slowly leaving the land and its rivers over flowing with water and now the water was creeping everywhere and forging new directions. The land had not seen the sun in a week's time and the cold was getting to man and beast and life was becoming unbearable. The little stream that ran through the village of perumalpuram was called sivatheertham and yet many people now wondered if it should have been called the agaya gangai which landed from the heavens on to the matted locks of the god they worshipped. The once gentle, shallow and gurgling stream had slowly swollen like a pregnant woman and was now raging through the village.
The elders of the village had somehow known that this monsoon was going to be bad and had moved most of the people to more elevated places near the temple.
The temple was situated on top of a small mountain and only a old priest and his wife lived on the premises. As the practice of old, the temple had leased the little property it owned to the farmers in the village and it was run on the income from the harvest but mostly with the goodwill of the villagers. The temple housed a small statue of lord vishnu and that was all it housed. It was an unremarkable temple in an unremarkable village and yet life revolved around it and with it revolved the lives of the villagers. Around the temple and slightly beneath it were small mandapams, built centuries ago for passing travellers to take refuge or rest their weary feet before they left to where ever they were going for not many people stopped at perumalpuram.
Whether by train or when you are travelling by road away from the city, you pass hundreds of villages and don't you wonder what is happening in those places. Don't you wonder what drama or what stories there must be hidden in those small and tiny villages and what dreams those children must have as they stand and wave to the people in the trains as it speeds past them.
The mandapam in which avini had taken refuge from the rain was about as big as a small room but it was solid in construction and there was no way in for the rain to get through. It was large enough for both avini and gayatri to stay in and it also held her meager, worldly belongings like a few clothes, mats and some utensils. One side of the small space was filled with dry wood which was stacked up to the ceiling. This was an age old practice that the villagers followed for it would be difficult to get dry wood during the monsoon rains and so all the wood was collected during the last weeks of summer. The wood burned to make food but also burnt to give light and security in the dark. Outside the huge trees spread their branches and acted like an umbrella for the mandapam and for the lives inside and the light deep inside. The shadows moved nearer and nearer and the trees responded to their presence and magically moved closer, closer and until they were bent over on the mandapam and nothing would or could pass through this thick cover of green and bark.
The dark monsoon clouds resembled the skin of lord krishna and they overpowered the sun and one could distinguish between day and night only by the gray of light and black of the night. The only noise was the beat of the millions and billions of raindrops that fell on the land and forest. Birds, beasts and men huddled in whatever shelter they found and the world close itself and time marched on.
The pain hit avini with each spasm and she moaned and then the pain hit again and again and it was unbearable and the screams left her body and travelled above the din and drum of the rain and reached the ears of the wife of the temple priest. Gayatri bellowed and the shadows in the forest grew restless and the roar of a lion was heard by everyone in the village.
The temple priest got up in a hurry for he too had heard the roar and saw that his wife was awake too. He looked at her with tears in his eyes and with a big smile and whispered ' it is time'. He told her that they had to go help the woman for she was in pain and so slowly they set off down the mountain, in the darkness with a firewood in hand blazing its oil rag and shedding light for a few feet around them.
They came to the mandapam that avini had taken refuge in and the priest's wife got busy boiling some water in a pot. She told her husband that it would be okay and asked him to sit near the entrance and she would call if she needed his help.
The pain increased with the spasms and the night moved on and then the water in the stream sivatheertham broke its banks and entered the village and at the same time the water in avini broke its boundaries and the old lady knew it was time and soon there would be new life in the village.
Time stood still and everything stood still and the temple priest standing guard knew that something special was happening and he knew it was magic and that it was beyond his limited reasoning.
Azhagan slipped out of avini in a rush and came out just as the sun came out of the dark monsoon clouds and the silence was broken by the screams of the child, the chirps of the birds and the roars of the lion. The priest did not know why he did it and he would ask himself why he did it but he fell to his knees and prayed to his god to protect the child and his mother. Many years later on her deathbed, the priest's wife would tell her grandchildren the tale of azhagan and how the light blazed around him as he was born and that his eyes glowed strangely.
The little fire blazing in the mandapam threw shadows all around it and it also threw light on the new mother and child and both the priest and his wife stared at them both and also stared at the mark on the child's left forearm. It looked like a birthmark and it moved and shimmered like a bunch of snakes. They stood watching in awe as gayatri the cow licked the baby clean and stood guard over mother and child.
Avini slowly opened her eyes and tried to focus her mind on her surroundings, for she had fallen into a deep sleep after delivering her child. She tried to wake up but was still tired and slightly disoriented from the pain of delivery and then hurriedly she reached out for her child and cried out in fear when she couldn't find it next to her. The priest's wife told her to relax not to worry and that she was cleaning the child with a cloth dipped in warm water. Avini begged her to bring the child for she was eager to feel and be with her baby. Hearing its mothers voice, the baby started screaming and protesting as if telling the world that it did not want to be separated from her, not even for a second, and kicked its legs and flailed its arms in warning. The priest's wife with a smile slowly placed the baby next to avini and the circle of magic closed between them. This would be their circle,this would be their bond, this would be their song, this would be their magic and no one else and nothing else would come near it or try coming near it.
The priest and his wife stood marveling at both mother and child and then he " avini,i have seen many a child born in this village and i have seen a few really beautiful children in the few times i have travelled to madurai and thanjai,but i have yet to see a baby as beautiful and radiant as this boy ".
Avini felt her child and saw the light of her child fill her senses and out beyond in the forest stood more lights and they stood watching her and avini knew she was not alone and was never alone.
Tears of joy filled her eyes and they filled her soul and she whispered to her son ' i have been alone and yet i loved you, ached for you before you were born. i have carried all these dreams and visions of you even before the spirits of the forest breathed you into me. I am ready to die now for i am content but i will live my life for you,i will breathe for you and die for you. I am beautiful because you are beautiful and so i will call you that. I will call you Azhagan.'
The boy stared at her and avini gasped when his tiny but strong fingers clasped his around her fingers and she knew why she had been named AVINI and what it meant.
Azhagiya kanne uravugal neeye
nee enge ini naan ange
en sei alla thaai nee
azhagiya kanne uravugal neeye
Whispers, fearful whispers filled the air and the priest and his wife turned and saw that all the villagers had assembled outside the mandapam but stood shaking and shivering in fear. The priest did not know what had scared them so and then his eyes opened wide in shock and fear for the crowds parted and a huge black maned lion gently made its way towards the mandapam and standing near the entrance roared loudly again and again and then slowly stretched itself in front of the entrance and watched everybody and the sun rose and blazed mightily on the village and for many miles around, people in other villages would look into the distance and wonder why the rain fell on them and yet the sun shone down somewhere near the horizon .The legend of the lion and the birth of azhagan would be told and retold for many centuries and people would wonder and marvel and even doubt if something like this could have actually taken place.
I am Azhagan. I am the son of Avini. I have travelled from the dark and i have come bearing light. I am going to sing for you and you will listen to my song and it is a song of love, betrayal, heartbreak and war.
"We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls."? Anas Nin, The Diary of Anas Nin, Vol. 7: 1966-1974
Why are you here? why are you born to these parents, married to this husband and what is it that bought you to this junction ?.
Some are born somewhere and end up somewhere else in a different part of the world and live their lives not knowing why, what or who bought them here. Sometime's paths cross and we wonder what if we had met that person before or why we did not meet that person before ?. life, it seems is an equation that we constantly try to solve and see if we can come up with another answer via another formula.
From darkness into light
It had been raining steadily, heavily and the monsoon was slowly leaving the land and its rivers over flowing with water and now the water was creeping everywhere and forging new directions. The land had not seen the sun in a week's time and the cold was getting to man and beast and life was becoming unbearable. The little stream that ran through the village of perumalpuram was called sivatheertham and yet many people now wondered if it should have been called the agaya gangai which landed from the heavens on to the matted locks of the god they worshipped. The once gentle, shallow and gurgling stream had slowly swollen like a pregnant woman and was now raging through the village.
The elders of the village had somehow known that this monsoon was going to be bad and had moved most of the people to more elevated places near the temple.
The temple was situated on top of a small mountain and only a old priest and his wife lived on the premises. As the practice of old, the temple had leased the little property it owned to the farmers in the village and it was run on the income from the harvest but mostly with the goodwill of the villagers. The temple housed a small statue of lord vishnu and that was all it housed. It was an unremarkable temple in an unremarkable village and yet life revolved around it and with it revolved the lives of the villagers. Around the temple and slightly beneath it were small mandapams, built centuries ago for passing travellers to take refuge or rest their weary feet before they left to where ever they were going for not many people stopped at perumalpuram.
Whether by train or when you are travelling by road away from the city, you pass hundreds of villages and don't you wonder what is happening in those places. Don't you wonder what drama or what stories there must be hidden in those small and tiny villages and what dreams those children must have as they stand and wave to the people in the trains as it speeds past them.
The mandapam in which avini had taken refuge from the rain was about as big as a small room but it was solid in construction and there was no way in for the rain to get through. It was large enough for both avini and gayatri to stay in and it also held her meager, worldly belongings like a few clothes, mats and some utensils. One side of the small space was filled with dry wood which was stacked up to the ceiling. This was an age old practice that the villagers followed for it would be difficult to get dry wood during the monsoon rains and so all the wood was collected during the last weeks of summer. The wood burned to make food but also burnt to give light and security in the dark. Outside the huge trees spread their branches and acted like an umbrella for the mandapam and for the lives inside and the light deep inside. The shadows moved nearer and nearer and the trees responded to their presence and magically moved closer, closer and until they were bent over on the mandapam and nothing would or could pass through this thick cover of green and bark.
The dark monsoon clouds resembled the skin of lord krishna and they overpowered the sun and one could distinguish between day and night only by the gray of light and black of the night. The only noise was the beat of the millions and billions of raindrops that fell on the land and forest. Birds, beasts and men huddled in whatever shelter they found and the world close itself and time marched on.
The pain hit avini with each spasm and she moaned and then the pain hit again and again and it was unbearable and the screams left her body and travelled above the din and drum of the rain and reached the ears of the wife of the temple priest. Gayatri bellowed and the shadows in the forest grew restless and the roar of a lion was heard by everyone in the village.
The temple priest got up in a hurry for he too had heard the roar and saw that his wife was awake too. He looked at her with tears in his eyes and with a big smile and whispered ' it is time'. He told her that they had to go help the woman for she was in pain and so slowly they set off down the mountain, in the darkness with a firewood in hand blazing its oil rag and shedding light for a few feet around them.
They came to the mandapam that avini had taken refuge in and the priest's wife got busy boiling some water in a pot. She told her husband that it would be okay and asked him to sit near the entrance and she would call if she needed his help.
The pain increased with the spasms and the night moved on and then the water in the stream sivatheertham broke its banks and entered the village and at the same time the water in avini broke its boundaries and the old lady knew it was time and soon there would be new life in the village.
Time stood still and everything stood still and the temple priest standing guard knew that something special was happening and he knew it was magic and that it was beyond his limited reasoning.
Azhagan slipped out of avini in a rush and came out just as the sun came out of the dark monsoon clouds and the silence was broken by the screams of the child, the chirps of the birds and the roars of the lion. The priest did not know why he did it and he would ask himself why he did it but he fell to his knees and prayed to his god to protect the child and his mother. Many years later on her deathbed, the priest's wife would tell her grandchildren the tale of azhagan and how the light blazed around him as he was born and that his eyes glowed strangely.
The little fire blazing in the mandapam threw shadows all around it and it also threw light on the new mother and child and both the priest and his wife stared at them both and also stared at the mark on the child's left forearm. It looked like a birthmark and it moved and shimmered like a bunch of snakes. They stood watching in awe as gayatri the cow licked the baby clean and stood guard over mother and child.
Avini slowly opened her eyes and tried to focus her mind on her surroundings, for she had fallen into a deep sleep after delivering her child. She tried to wake up but was still tired and slightly disoriented from the pain of delivery and then hurriedly she reached out for her child and cried out in fear when she couldn't find it next to her. The priest's wife told her to relax not to worry and that she was cleaning the child with a cloth dipped in warm water. Avini begged her to bring the child for she was eager to feel and be with her baby. Hearing its mothers voice, the baby started screaming and protesting as if telling the world that it did not want to be separated from her, not even for a second, and kicked its legs and flailed its arms in warning. The priest's wife with a smile slowly placed the baby next to avini and the circle of magic closed between them. This would be their circle,this would be their bond, this would be their song, this would be their magic and no one else and nothing else would come near it or try coming near it.
The priest and his wife stood marveling at both mother and child and then he " avini,i have seen many a child born in this village and i have seen a few really beautiful children in the few times i have travelled to madurai and thanjai,but i have yet to see a baby as beautiful and radiant as this boy ".
Avini felt her child and saw the light of her child fill her senses and out beyond in the forest stood more lights and they stood watching her and avini knew she was not alone and was never alone.
Tears of joy filled her eyes and they filled her soul and she whispered to her son ' i have been alone and yet i loved you, ached for you before you were born. i have carried all these dreams and visions of you even before the spirits of the forest breathed you into me. I am ready to die now for i am content but i will live my life for you,i will breathe for you and die for you. I am beautiful because you are beautiful and so i will call you that. I will call you Azhagan.'
The boy stared at her and avini gasped when his tiny but strong fingers clasped his around her fingers and she knew why she had been named AVINI and what it meant.
Azhagiya kanne uravugal neeye
nee enge ini naan ange
en sei alla thaai nee
azhagiya kanne uravugal neeye
Whispers, fearful whispers filled the air and the priest and his wife turned and saw that all the villagers had assembled outside the mandapam but stood shaking and shivering in fear. The priest did not know what had scared them so and then his eyes opened wide in shock and fear for the crowds parted and a huge black maned lion gently made its way towards the mandapam and standing near the entrance roared loudly again and again and then slowly stretched itself in front of the entrance and watched everybody and the sun rose and blazed mightily on the village and for many miles around, people in other villages would look into the distance and wonder why the rain fell on them and yet the sun shone down somewhere near the horizon .The legend of the lion and the birth of azhagan would be told and retold for many centuries and people would wonder and marvel and even doubt if something like this could have actually taken place.
I am Azhagan. I am the son of Avini. I have travelled from the dark and i have come bearing light. I am going to sing for you and you will listen to my song and it is a song of love, betrayal, heartbreak and war.
Debate Mansion
