*A Tale of Two Brothers*by Aditi & Jhanvi *Stopped* - Page 12

Originally posted by: _UptoNoGood_

I.love. your.characters. *salutes Vasundhara*

And Kabir!

And Viraj!

Hell I even like your Vikram! Matlab the way I liked Bellatrix... I hate but I love...

Oh just carry on with the sheer awesome-ness!

P.S. Don't laugh. I'm trying to de-addict myself from the forum.

Originally posted by: Ekstase

Hello guys 😉

I was planning to comment yesterday but couldn't due to the restrictions of posts (lol, I overdid it, apparently 😆) - so, my review is coming a little late.

First chapters are mostly the difficult ones, at least for me. It's hard to find a good introduction that will have the readers hooked - I liked you intro to the story a lot. We got introduced to the main characters, got a look into their lives, their goals and what was driving them forward.

I agree, an appealing first chapter is hard to build. You think we got it right? Thank you!😊

Vasundhara and Kabir - aww, they were really sweet together 😳 Though, you have me curious about what she found in that chest, what had been in that diary which, as I assume, drove her away from her family and made her keep Kabir away from his family, as well. Whatever it was, it must have been terrible for her to even leave Viraj behind and it's still haunting her and apparently it marked her deeply. I got that from how she seems over-protective of Kabir. As he mentions himself, she never lets him be too far away from her, always keeping him close and yet, refuses to talk about the past, about their family. Kabir, on the other hand, loves him mom a lot, it's obvious and understandable. Though, he does feel that there's something amiss with their little family, I guess in a way he longs for a father and maybe other family members that could make them complete. But right now, he harbours a lot of anger toward his father (I assume?) because he can't bear so see his mother in so much pain even after all these years.

Well, Vasundhara is a strong person before being a Mother. That's what we've tried to portray. And yes, Kabir wants to know about the complete story and take a look at the whole picture, not the fragments that Vasundhara has been handing to him. But, I can tell you, he harbors no ill will for anyone. Mostly because he has no idea - absolutely none - about his past.

Though, he wants to change his scholarship with his friend's, did I get that right? 😆 His mother won't be too happy once she finds out. But it just shows how desperate Kabir is to know everything that he's even willing to risk his own dreams for it.

Well, beacuse exchanging isn't really possible, he gave up on it 😛

Nisha - I liked how you portrayed her with Saurav! They share a beautiful friendship, Saurav being very supportive and encouraging, trying to help Nisha move forward in her life. And it's good that he got her to join LA, it will do her good, though she's obviously still trying to find her path in life. She will find it, I'm sure about that 😉

Btw, a bit off-topic but: I haven't watched some episodes of NAUC in between due to personal issues so I was wondering... I know that Nisha took up shooting and Viraj was her mentor in LA. So, is LA like a sports' academy? Like any normal academy except that the focus here is on different kinds of sports? And Viraj being the boss... like a chairman?

LA is basically a Shooting Academy. And Viraj is the owner, and the chairman in that respect, I guess 😛 The rest Jhanvi Di told you about 😆

Anyway, Viraj and Arjun - another cute moment The bond between father and son is really strong which is only logical because after Vasundhara left, Arjun had to raise Viraj and he did a splendid job at it! And he seems overly-worried for his son, always checking if he's alright- it's really sweet. Viraj... he still misses his mom, huh? He probably has no idea why she left (I doubt Arjun has?) and might feel hurt and even angry at his mother for leaving- which child wouldn't? But even with this hole in their lives, father and son are doing alright- and Viraj is finding back to his path, his shooting.

Well, the questions you asked here will be answered soon😛

I liked the link between the two cake-scenes, by the way! In London, Vasundhara keeps up the tradition and in India, Arjun 👏 And the last part with Shyam Singh - nice. Show that the Rathores are good people if Shyam sees them as his second family!

Now, I'm curious how Nisha and Kabir will meet - and of course, the first encounter between the brothers 😳

Well done, nicely written, a beautiful introduction to the story with little deatils and hint thrown in here and there that breathed more life into everything! Keep up the good work, guys 😉

Thank you!! 😃 I'm looking forward to your review of the second chapter 😛

Originally posted by: Nuha09

It was just AMAZING!!!!
It is getting interesting day by day...
Continue soon and thanks for the PM...