Originally posted by: CoolBeans86
@ pyaaribehna
I'm not sure how much I agree with Riya being sensitive to Preeti's pain in marrying Nandu. Again, I think that was Preeti's responsibility. Marriage isn't a joke and she knows that- or she "should" know that. No woman or man should allow anyone to force them into marriage- however, of course its never that simple. She got swept along with it and "apparently" didn't have a choice. She COULD have made the choice to refuse to marry Nandu- just like Riya made the public choice not to marry Amit. But here I agree with you again- god knows what Preetis family would have done to her had she refused, whereas, Riya still had her father's full support and her dadi-bua who didn't even want her married into that family in the first place. HOWEVER, Preeti still had options- she still could have refused Nandu right there and then, left SS and gone to live with her uncle (kushias brother- her aunt is a good woman, a billion times better than her own good for nothing mother). Preeti DID have options- but she made her bed, now lie in it. Its all on her head, in my opinion, even after looking at it from all these angles. However, yes I agree, Riya could be a little more "sensitive" to her situation. Shen not there to bail her out or fix her life for her, but she could have "worded" it differently- and that's as far as I can agree on that. She could have even told her that there are other ways out of this mess. She could divorce or move out and live with other family members if she is truly unhappy- not to just sit like a duck and accept her fate. We are all in charge of our fate more than we are not- there is that 10% that seems to get us no matter what we do or don't do- but 90% of the time I believe we are in charge of our lives- all that is truly needed is guts. If you have the courage to stand up for yourself, no one can screw you over. But preeti is sat whining about her lot in life when she is the one who created it. I don't feel sorry for her even a little bit; what good will it do to feel sorry for someone who wont help themselves? How is that empowering anyone? I wont sit and cry with her- and I suppose in a way that's what Riya might have meant? That what has happened has happened in your life- now live it the best way you can. However, I do agree that she should have added to that "you can change your life if youre brave enough to do it, its possible". But I'll tell you something- Riya is not the one who should be talking to that girl, neither is the mother or father- only one of the siblings should be talking to her like this because shes not responsive to anyone at the moment- least of all riya. And yet no one is temporarily ignoring her temper tantrums (which are obviously a mask for the pain she is in) and just being her friend or just being on her side. How many of us have had friends or siblings or someone we care about who had got a bad deal in life and lash out at the world because they couldn't handle it anymore? Do we just shun them and scream and shout at them forever? No you let them express their anger for a while and then eventually you sit them down and somehow try and get through to them- you put their anger aside for two measely minutes and see the person behind all that anger. But who in this stupid show has done anything like that? Don't even count stupid kushia speaking to her in that mousy voice "beta this, beta that" because all she does is speak in a soft voice and tell her daughter to just "deal with it"- no help whatsoever. On the one hand I don't blame Preeti for turning out this way, on the other I think she is completely out of control and needs someone to give her a good throttle and shake and de-clog the spiky cobwebs from her head. She needs to be jolted out of this funk she is in. Not told to sit and accept her fate. I myself would claw someones eyes out if they told me "oh well this is your life, deal with it". You want someone to say to you "here, ill help you out of this hole, but you got to do 95% of the work yourself, you got to be brave enough and if youre not then I'm not doing it for you". She needs tough love- really really tough love- but not hating on. WE can hate her- we are the viewers, we're not her sister and mother and father. But her stupid family should try and use their pea sized brains. She wasn't born this way, was she? They have helped mold her into this vicious harpie and if they give a crap about her, then they need to make their love for her count more than their anger at her. But no one is bothering. Riya is the last person who owes her ANYTHING. I dont see why she should stick her neck out any more for this girl than she already has. She herself could have gotten badly hurt trying to rescue preeti from mohit and what thanks did she get? Yes she lied blah blah blah- but she also put herself at risk to look out for this idiot and what she got in return was kicked out of her own home. If anything riya should be angry with this idiot, not consoling her with "jo hogaya etc"- even that is too good for her. The people who SHOULD be helping her have shunned her and the one who should be fuming with her is helping her. Its all backwards. I infact think riya is being too sensitive to her in all honesty. How much more sensitive will she be now? Until she takes a chunk of her soul too?
Maybe you and I disagree on the scene/conversation interpretation between Riya and Nandu. I didn't really interpret it as a "deal" that she made with him, because I remember she was speaking to herself a while ago saying that once she has sorted out her own marriage situation she will then help Preeti's marriage. So this "deal" wasn't a deal, to me. She was just thanking nandu for helping her in whatever way he could and then she was promising him to help him after her own marriage is sorted out. It wasn't an exchange of favours- she wasn't saying to him "if you do this for me, then I will do this for you"- that's not how I interpreted it anyway. But its ok if we disagree on that- because many people will have interpreted that conversation differently. The point is- whether there was a deal OR not- riya is focussing on her own life and rightly so. And preeti needs to buck up and focus on hers instead of wasting her energy scowling and hating on the world. Yes- she needed to get angry- she needed that emotional impetus, that emotional "energy" so to speak, to get her to drive forwards in this situation, to make braver choices- but what is she doing with all that anger? Instead of using it to her advantage and making things right- she is sinking and drowning in it and getting stuck in the quicksand even more. Shes not using her anger, shes getting stuck in it. At least- no matter how STUPID we all think riya is- she is using her pain/anger/whatever you want to call it, to change her situation. Somehow. ANYTHING but grumbling and mumbling and sulking about her situation- even those stupid gaudy saris are better than her sat doing nothing whatsoever.
As for the divorce; well I was asking my hubby about that and I think I agree with you there That even before actual divorce, if the judge orders a 6 month trial period where you try and make your marriage work, that doesn't mean you can force yourself into each others' homes. It just means you work at your marriage- whether you choose to live together or apart. But you cant force yourself into another person's home- for all intents and purposes, SS does not belong to Shivam, it belongs to shanti. So only if she gives permission can riya live there. If not then she needs to find her own accommodation- but no judge could force shanti to allow riya to live there EVEN if shes still married to shivam. So yes, agree with you there- But of course this is MAM- as Maverick coined it, if we can have "Microwave Weddings" then anything is possible in this world!
And I think we all agree- or most of us do- that riya should sod them all off and stop running around after them like a headless chicken. Pick your self respect back off the SS floor and walk away. And stop wearing those sarees- its having zero effect no matter what her intentions are.
As for the clothes- well really its a moot point- because we know riya is just trying to irritate shanti and get on her nerves by dressing like that. But whats irritating US is that its having no effect and is utterly pointless and shes making an idiot out of herself the longer she dresses like that. Shes trying to get under shanti's skin and "show" that she can be just as traditional as she is- but she forgets that she cant change who she is no matter what clothes she wears.
Good discussion here with everyone! Nice to see differing opinions without biting each other's heads off haha! 😆
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