DOTW: Fool me once, shame on you;fool me twice..?

Good morning, Ladies! I hope you are all as ready as I am to start giggling and swooning and what not for another four days. New Monday, new DOTW. I have to apologize for the lame title though😳


Last week I pretty much spent wondering if Naku doesn't get Dutta's obvious hints or if she just didn't want to notice them. On monday she remembered that Dutta told her (not only once, by the way) that his responsibility is to hand her over to her mother. Nothing more, nothing less. She didn't see the cute smile of approval on Dutta's lips when AS said that not only Babi's daughter, but also the daughter in law of the house has returned. So I somehow understood why she was didn't want to get her hopes too high despite of everything that has happened in Anna's house and on their way home. But Dutta didn't stop there, he continued to be quite open for a guy like him about his new found feelings (and my, if that is really only the beginning, then we should really think about booking an ICU for the members here. Somewhere in the middle of the world, with TV, ice cream and chocolate of course. Wow, I am starting to like the idea, we could really have a blast there! But I am going off topic 😆). And our Naku, our humble, innocent Naku is confused. At least that is what I thought until Thursday.

After her conversation with Babi I know she knows too. She may not dare to even dream of the intensity of his feelings, but deep down inside she knows he cares and he is ready to start afresh.

Last time she hid something from Dutta many of us were shaking their heads in disbelief. We knew love makes a person do the dumbest things, but still we wanted her badly not to be one of those people. But she is Naku after all. Only her Sahib's happiness in mind she hid the fact that Sups loves another man and wanted to run away. Thinking all would work out eventually if she only gets the marriage to take place smoothly.

It backfired as we all know. And Dutta had all rights to be furious. He considered her as a good friend. And a friend should tell you the truth about your fiance, even if it hurts.

Now Naku knows that hiding her face is lying, hiding something from him. Again. To even top it, she didn't speak up when he saw her in Anna's house. And he surely will remember the girl later when the truth is out. But knowing that he again reached the healing state, the state where he wants to give live another chance, I fear she is ready to yet make the same ol' mistake (of doooom) again.

Of course a week for us is just moments in LTL-land. But we already see her pondering almost the same thoughts as months before.

Even if covering her face is not a betrayal per se it might become a big issue. Dutta trusts her now, but her innocence has never been proven. Sup's and Ravi's case hangs over Nakus head like the sword of Damocles. Even if Dutta doesn't cry out "betrayal" again, even if he doesn't go on a drinking spree again, it could be another disaster hovering between them in the air especially with Kala around.

Now let me throw a rather controversial thought/question into our cozy- virtual- room for all of you who didn't doze off reading my ramblings:

Naku is portrayed as the good girl with a golden heart. Her love is selfless, she is selfless. All she does is for her "Sahib's" happiness. Lying about Sups, monitoring her and separate her from the man she loves almost forcing her into a marriage that would have been a disaster for both the husband and wife. Now hiding her true self even in Anna's house. It may not have been the right time and place for the revelation per se, but it was a dangerous situation and she just couldn't bring herself up to speak.

All for Dutta's happiness. Unconditonal, selfless love.

Right?

Or maybe not?

Even if unintended, unconsciously, could there be a wee bit of egoism paired with Naku's actions (or lack of actions)? The only thing that matters to her is him and his feelings. A happy Dutta means a happy Naku too.

Can love at all ever be selfless? Even if we sacrifice something for the other person, isn't it always about us as well?

I would love to read your views on this 😊

Hey HUM!!

Very nice post Eva.

And yes i thnk love could be selfless..maybe not as much as Naku but yes..it can be selfless...i have seen it (was part of it) but realized it after cing Tasha' love. And thats y i love this LS and serial a lot. its no more jst story for me but a real life thng.

Maybe thats y Naku was never wrong for me. Watever she has done and is doing is out of pure blind selfless true love. Watever her heart tells she does..she never listens to her parents or her alter ego...jst her small heart inside. it maybe sups thng or her beauty...she never calls purohit or goes and sits wit frnds. She does discuss wit her mom but then atlast she takes her call. if she feels thngs r now out of control she leaves it to Bappa

In love a person ignores the whole concept of betrayal and luks at the happiness of our only love. it maybe betrayal frm viewers point of view but atleast our love will be happy.

i have lots ?going in mind but cant put forward..anywaz for me love will always stay selfless....

Originally posted by: ccolaco

Very nice post Eva.

And yes i thnk love could be selfless..maybe not as much as Naku but yes..it can be selfless...i have seen it (was part of it) but realized it after cing Tasha' love. And thats y i love this LS and serial a lot. its no more jst story for me but a real life thng.

Maybe thats y Naku was never wrong for me. Watever she has done and is doing is out of pure blind selfless true love. Watever her heart tells she does..she never listens to her parents or her alter ego...jst her small heart inside. it maybe sups thng or her beauty...she never calls purohit or goes and sits wit frnds. She does discuss wit her mom but then atlast she takes her call. if she feels thngs r now out of control she leaves it to Bappa

In love a person ignores the whole concept of betrayal and luks at the happiness of our only love. it maybe betrayal frm viewers point of view but atleast our love will be happy.

i have lots ?going in mind but cant put forward..anywaz for me love will always stay selfless....

Wonderful answers! Keep them coming.

I know it's quite a tricky question, not that easy to answer. What made me think of this- maybe controversial- subject was a song I heard again last week. Girl left guy, guy starts to understand what went wrong. There is one line that kept me thinking. Loosely- and lously- tramslated it would go like this:

"Whenever I thought I made everything for her
everything I did was somehow for me"

And that made me think of yet another thing that happened last week:

We went to a fair with the kids (again) and we had promised they could buy themselves something there. My daughter wanted a baloon. She got it and was the happiest little girl on earth. But when we arrived home and she got out of the car, the thing flew away and there was no way I could catch it in time (quite a stormy area here 😕).

So, what did I do seeing the girl all sad?

I promised her to take her to Toys'r'Us(note; I hate the store, and I hate entering it even more whit the kids) the next day to buy a new one. The next day, right after work, starving and quite tired, I picked her and her brother up from kindergarden and took her to this awful store. And it was worth it seeing her face light up again.

If you would ask me, if I did it for her I would immideatly say "of course!". But did I really? Didn't see her so sad, walking behing me with her head bent down all heartbroken, break my heart too? I did it because I couldn't see her "suffer". And making her happy again made me happy too. Right?

But I don't think it's that easy to answer and I am sure most of you will agree here.

I will come back to each and every answer later with time (and when I shouldn't be working 😆).

Eva! *Aisha Throws Pepsi*

Good question, Eva. Two ways I wanted to answer it: one, in general, and two, about Naku's love.

First, love can be selfish...but in a different way. Love is selfish when you don't let the other person be or when you have you have expectations of the other person with regards to you.

But I think in general when people fall in love, it is so outwardly-focused. You are besotted with the other person, and your FIRST thought is for them, then for the two of you as a couple, and lastly, you. You want the other person's happiness, you care about what is happening to them, you feel their excitement or pain, wish they did not have to go through certain things, etc. So, in the midst of all this, we don't think of ourselves first. There is a selflessness.

With these serials, I want to hit my head on the desk, everytime I see the whole idea of "selfless love" on TV. It is so patently absurd, so extreme that I cannot bring myself to believe it. E.G. Pavitra Rishta,etc. We praise Naku for her selfless love and I agree. But the way her selfless love was portrayed is extreme, and sometimes downright comical. E.G. Sups situation. I am thankful, really thankful that LTL has not approached the bizarre levels of selfless love as other shows have (Pavitra Rishta), which makes you scratch your head and say why are they complicating all this?
A part of me gets annoyed at these shows for showing mainly women who GIVE selfless love, who SUFFER for their love, who SACRIFICE their happiness for their love...it's the typical female attribute that these shows glamorize: women--Unselfish, only looking for what is best for their families and husbands.

I tend to think love is a gift and it is ok to be selfish about it, it is ok to want it for yourself. No need to marry off a guy to a woman who does not love him a la Naku style. Love is a stepping stone for personal growth...you discover so much about yourself, others, and it changes your perceptions about life. It also makes you think in terms of "us, we, you", not just "me". It's a great, great thing, when love is shared and when people are committed to it. Even when it is a little selfish, so long as you are not hurting the other person. You know what I man?

Nakku's love is both selfish and selfless. True Nakku never thought abt herself when it came to Dutta. For her, her every thought and decision had been abt Dutta. But there was always a selfish side to her love for Dutta.
Nakku's love always reminds me of these lines from the song Yaa Rabba
In the show Nakku does say something similar to these lines. the part after Kala gets shot and Kishore gives her a pep talk, Nakku tells Babi something like she wud kill anyone if Dutta asks.
And during the Supriya fiasco, all Nakku had cared abt was Dutta's happiness or rather on wht she thought was to be Dutta's happiness and better future. True Supriya was not a a nice human being and she was wrong, but still it was her life too tht Nakku was deciding. Nakku shud have either told Dutta Surpiya's truth or let her quietly get away but instead she decided to "sacrifice" Supriya's life and happiness for Dutta's sake.
So, if you ask me Nakku is selfless when it comes to Dutta and she is also selfish when it comes to Dutta. But then I guess, everyone in love is like tht, since I have never been in love I don't know whether you can be truly selfless in love😳

P.S: In no way am I justifying Supriya🤢😆

Originally posted by: Dancingdoll

Hey HUM!!

First before I answer that......*hugs*....*pokes HUM*...where have u been without your TUM? 🤣

Ahh, you know, the new laptop is still to come tomorrow or wednesday. Till then I have to bear with a desktop pc that keeps freezing all the timeand my iPod. Missing the discussions a lot!

And why u asking this Question? u have a doubt on my selfless love?? 🤣


Never! Ever! 😆

okie...before we get tagged for Dostaana...let me jump to ur topic....

well, once a friend told me that Love is never selfless because when u think about other persons happiness, and u perform actions that makes the other person happy, u inturn become happy...and the "u" part that pops in here, doesnt make Love selfless!! V logical.....but then nothing in this world wuld be tagged asselfless by this logic...."selfless" wuld become amyth!! But, I like the concept of Unconditional and selfless love, so, I choose to keep this particular point in "Exception" or "Disclaimer" and then define selfless/unconditional love....

for eg; If I have to suffer to make my love flourish, then I would totally do it....that wuld be selfless and unconditional and I ignore the "disclaimer/exception" here that while I am suffering, I am still happy that atleast my Love is flourishing.....so, Its a very pleasant gesture which falls under a "good karma" category.....as long as it falls under tht category, every exception can be ignored....being not selfless like this, is welcome with both the hands!!!.....

When I suffer, and make my love prosper, I go in the background and my love becomes my focus and protaganist of the scene.....so, the whole point of tht scene wuld be the feelings and happiness of the protaganist for me...in that case, my feelings can be ignored....my happiness on seeing my love can be kept aside...I dont even give a second on how happy "I" am to see him happy....I only think how happy he is!! what counts is happiness of tht man...and that is when it becomes selfless....

Thats the situation here - As Naku, I am not thinking about my feelings, I didnt even think for once that, "oh! If I hide my truth, Dutta wuld remain happy and in turn make me happy".....What i thought was, "Oh! If I hide the truth, Dutta wuld remain happy."...and immediately after that I put a "period" to my thought...I did not think further "And in turn make me happy".....so, that made it selfless.....even if the byproduct of that action was tht I too was happy, but the objective and result of the test was Dutta remains happy!!!.....No one eventhought aboutthe Byproduct including me!!

I know lot of rambling....but my 2 cents!!

I love to read your ramblings! So basically the fact that I at that moment don't think about me makes an act selfless. Totally agree. Therefore the addition about the subconsciousness. Making him feel good makes me feel good. But according to you (and me too, and many others I guess) our Naku's mind is full of her "Sahib" I guess (and I think many members here can't blame her for that😆), "me" is banned to some dark corner of her mind since she fellin love with him.

(Pls note, I am not at all advocating for naku here, I dnt think she shld hide the truth from Dutta NOW, when she knows marriage is ON, but thats not the topic of discussion....right HUM??

I do consider her foolish in dng that and I too compared this deed to hiding the truth about Sups in some thread (I guess my e-LS) but I do rate this act as selfless even if foolish.....)

It's not, but I don't mind it being throwing into the discussion at all. I already said it way back when she hid the truth about Sups; love makes the most clever people do the most stupid things. She should have told him by now, they are home, had some time to tale a breath, now she could talk to him. I agree, like most here I think, she has to act now.

Thanks, Tum! I know it's almost a philosophical question and not easy to answer, the subject is not reallytangible. I really appreciate every answer😊