Posted:
[30 Nov/14]
originally posted here in AT 51.
A DRABBLE TO RELIEVE MY STRESS about that awful "you must marry suresh" promo 😡
and yes, the title is a random bit of shakespeare...from the speech in hamlet about how sleep is a consummation devoutly to be wished...wanted to write something on those lines, but this happened instead 😛
WITH APOLOGIES FOR MY HINDI, and english translations for nuha and anyone else who wanted them 😳
the native hue of resolution
*abhi is all mixed up thinking pragya wants a divorce*
*concludes that finally she feels able to step free and go for what she really wants - that goddamn double battery. the video has exposed her truth and set her free*
*abhi thinks fine, if that's what she wants, that's what will happen...doesn't think about why he wants to give her what she wants.*
*ignores the searing pain in his chest, vaguely thinking he needs to tell robin to turn down the mirch in the everyday cooking*
*feels distantly depressed that he is apparently approaching middle age because why else would he have heartburn*
*the same day prags asks for divorce, in the evening when he finally is clear of his hangover, he comes up to the room and sees pragya folding his clothes*
*he wonders why she's bothering with wifely tasks when she's decided to leave him*
*he grabs his shirt from her hands and roughly turns her around by the wrists. abhi says: suno!* (listen!)
*pragya pulls away from him and takes two steps back. abhi is confused by the flash of fear on her face. he does not remember fully what happened the previous night...*
*pragya demands impatiently: kya hai?!* (what is it?!)
*abhi: tumhe jaana hai na? theek hai, jao. lekin tumaare us double battery se shaadi karne hoga.* (you want to leave? fine, leave. but you will have to marry that double battery.)
*pragya: WHAT?!*
*abhi: that's how we'll manage the video. once you marry him, the media will tell the story differently. it will go better for me. my fans will feel sorry for me once they understand the full truth of your betrayal. no one will ever understand why you didn't want me in the first place, but whatever, it will work.*
*pragya: HAVE YOU GONE MAD. YOU FLAMING IDIOT. THIS IS THE LIMIT.*
*abhi: umm? what?*
*pragya: I KNOW YOU DON'T LIKE ME BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU GET TO KEEP DESTROYING MY LIFE EVEN WHEN I'M TRYING TO LEAVE YOU, YOU SELFISH EGOMANIACAL JERK*
*abhi: 😲 😕...*
*pragya: I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I CAN LOVE YOU. You have this big heart, but there's no room for me in it. You have the world's most beautiful smile, but it will never genuinely show for me. I must be the most deluded and insane woman in the world, to love such a husband as you.*
*abhi is super confused. also chashmish loves him? what is that warm surge of heat suddenly rushing through him? well, at least it seems to be clearing up the heartburn*
*pragya: why is my life such a joke? does bhagwan want me to end myself i wonder? picchle janaam mein main kya kiya tha itne sazaa paane ki liye?* (does god want me to end myself i wonder? what did i do in my past life to earn such punishment?)
*abhi is alarmed, chashmish is sensible and chalak, why the hell is she talking about ending herself. abhi says: listen -*
*pragya: NO, YOU LISTEN. I will never, ever marry Suresh. I don't love him, I don't want him, and I sure as hell have not been sleeping with him. Do you know why our engagement ended? NOT because I want your money - because HE wants my sister. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? Every man in this world wants my sister, even my best friend. The only thing that remains is for my husband to want her too. maybe that's my next sazaa?* (maybe that's my next punishment)
*abhi stares at her in confusion, he is completely appalled*
*pragya stares up at the ceiling: kya bhagwanji, yeh hi dekhne baaki haain na? jaab inhe tanu ki chakkar se azaadi milegi, taab woh bb ki finally notice karega, nahin? aur taab main aap hi ki paas aaongi, yeh chahti hain naa aap?* (is that it God, this is what is ahead for me? when he's done with tanu, he'll finally notice bulbul, right? and at that time i'll come to you, that's what you want isn't it?)
*abhi grabs her by the shoulders abhi: chasmish! ehh chashmish what nonsense are you talking! hey even i know that your bhagwan does not approve of suicide*
*pragya stares at him with tears streaming down her face. pragya says: what do you care? you just want me off your hands, right? you just want to do damage control to save your career, it doesn't matter to you what happens to me, you don't -*
*abhi: i care! i care! i didn't know - about that db - he has awful taste - i would never - your sister is a child! why are men looking at her! i need to lockup purab too maybe - but that doesn't matter -- what was that video?!!!*
*pragya: oh, now you want to know? i've been trying to tell you for days, and now only you might believe me?*
*abhi: i'm sorry...i'm sorry...all of this is beyond my control. just tell me what happened that night.*
*pragya explains about falling down the stairs, in a moody sarcastic kind of way*
*abhi: what! you fell down the stairs? did you break anything? are you hurt?*
*pragya: three days later is a little late for these questions! but waise the only thing that broke was my heart, when you came home and didn't believe me*
*abhi falls to his knees. pleads: i'm sorry...i should have believed you...forgive me chashmish, this whole thing has made me crazy...when i saw him that close to you i...my brain shut down. i'm sorry!*
*pragya mutters: mann kar raha hai aap ke balcony se bhar phek ne ka. too bad i can't lift you.* (i feel like throwing you over the balcony outside)
*abhi: i'm sorry...i didn't hear what you said?*
*pragya: i said you're infuriating and i don't want to forgive you and the least you could do is get me remarried to someone hot.
*abhi: WHAT.*
*pragya: but i know that's more than you can manage so i will settle for...oh, a month's worth of apologies*
*abhi: uhh...ok?*
*pragya: and you have to leave that chudail and take me to switzerland.*
*abhi: switzerland?*
*pragya: and we will film our own MMS but it will stay private.*
*abhi is shocked O.O!! but a little intrigued...!*
*pragya: waise aap ko haq jataana tha na? well i agree but my condition is switzerland.* (you wanted to assert your rights didn't you?)
*abhi: haq jataana tha matlab?* (what do you mean assert my rights?)
*pragya frowns and says: yaad nahin hain? naashe ki harkaton bhool gaya? it figures, my damn life...* (you don't remember? forgot what you did while drunk?)
*abhi: do you mean when i was drunk i tried to - i came to you and -?"
*pragya: yes. and i threw you out.*
*abhi: so nothing happened?*
*pragya: nothing happened.*
*abhi: good. i don't want to be drunk when we - well waise do we have a deal chashmish? no more stupid talk of ending yourself or divorce?*
*pragya: well i dunno, do we have a deal? no more tanu and no more stupid talk about marrying suresh?*
*abhi: yes, yes we have a deal! i will text tanu that we're over, right now.*
*pragya: shabaash aap ko aakal aaye. try not to see her again. in the meantime i am going to take a bath to get rid of this oily sick feeling i have of you trying to throw me at suresh.* (well done, you've gained some wisdom)
*abhi: i'm sorry...can i help?*
*pragya: book the tickets for switzerland.*
*abhi foresees a long future of bowing to his biwi's every small wish. he doesn't mind the vision. abhi says: yes, dear...*
the end!
WITH APOLOGIES FOR MY HINDI, and english translations for nuha and anyone else who wanted them 😳
the native hue of resolution
*abhi is all mixed up thinking pragya wants a divorce*
*concludes that finally she feels able to step free and go for what she really wants - that goddamn double battery. the video has exposed her truth and set her free*
*abhi thinks fine, if that's what she wants, that's what will happen...doesn't think about why he wants to give her what she wants.*
*ignores the searing pain in his chest, vaguely thinking he needs to tell robin to turn down the mirch in the everyday cooking*
*feels distantly depressed that he is apparently approaching middle age because why else would he have heartburn*
*the same day prags asks for divorce, in the evening when he finally is clear of his hangover, he comes up to the room and sees pragya folding his clothes*
*he wonders why she's bothering with wifely tasks when she's decided to leave him*
*he grabs his shirt from her hands and roughly turns her around by the wrists. abhi says: suno!* (listen!)
*pragya pulls away from him and takes two steps back. abhi is confused by the flash of fear on her face. he does not remember fully what happened the previous night...*
*pragya demands impatiently: kya hai?!* (what is it?!)
*abhi: tumhe jaana hai na? theek hai, jao. lekin tumaare us double battery se shaadi karne hoga.* (you want to leave? fine, leave. but you will have to marry that double battery.)
*pragya: WHAT?!*
*abhi: that's how we'll manage the video. once you marry him, the media will tell the story differently. it will go better for me. my fans will feel sorry for me once they understand the full truth of your betrayal. no one will ever understand why you didn't want me in the first place, but whatever, it will work.*
*pragya: HAVE YOU GONE MAD. YOU FLAMING IDIOT. THIS IS THE LIMIT.*
*abhi: umm? what?*
*pragya: I KNOW YOU DON'T LIKE ME BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU GET TO KEEP DESTROYING MY LIFE EVEN WHEN I'M TRYING TO LEAVE YOU, YOU SELFISH EGOMANIACAL JERK*
*abhi: 😲 😕...*
*pragya: I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I CAN LOVE YOU. You have this big heart, but there's no room for me in it. You have the world's most beautiful smile, but it will never genuinely show for me. I must be the most deluded and insane woman in the world, to love such a husband as you.*
*abhi is super confused. also chashmish loves him? what is that warm surge of heat suddenly rushing through him? well, at least it seems to be clearing up the heartburn*
*pragya: why is my life such a joke? does bhagwan want me to end myself i wonder? picchle janaam mein main kya kiya tha itne sazaa paane ki liye?* (does god want me to end myself i wonder? what did i do in my past life to earn such punishment?)
*abhi is alarmed, chashmish is sensible and chalak, why the hell is she talking about ending herself. abhi says: listen -*
*pragya: NO, YOU LISTEN. I will never, ever marry Suresh. I don't love him, I don't want him, and I sure as hell have not been sleeping with him. Do you know why our engagement ended? NOT because I want your money - because HE wants my sister. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? Every man in this world wants my sister, even my best friend. The only thing that remains is for my husband to want her too. maybe that's my next sazaa?* (maybe that's my next punishment)
*abhi stares at her in confusion, he is completely appalled*
*pragya stares up at the ceiling: kya bhagwanji, yeh hi dekhne baaki haain na? jaab inhe tanu ki chakkar se azaadi milegi, taab woh bb ki finally notice karega, nahin? aur taab main aap hi ki paas aaongi, yeh chahti hain naa aap?* (is that it God, this is what is ahead for me? when he's done with tanu, he'll finally notice bulbul, right? and at that time i'll come to you, that's what you want isn't it?)
*abhi grabs her by the shoulders abhi: chasmish! ehh chashmish what nonsense are you talking! hey even i know that your bhagwan does not approve of suicide*
*pragya stares at him with tears streaming down her face. pragya says: what do you care? you just want me off your hands, right? you just want to do damage control to save your career, it doesn't matter to you what happens to me, you don't -*
*abhi: i care! i care! i didn't know - about that db - he has awful taste - i would never - your sister is a child! why are men looking at her! i need to lockup purab too maybe - but that doesn't matter -- what was that video?!!!*
*pragya: oh, now you want to know? i've been trying to tell you for days, and now only you might believe me?*
*abhi: i'm sorry...i'm sorry...all of this is beyond my control. just tell me what happened that night.*
*pragya explains about falling down the stairs, in a moody sarcastic kind of way*
*abhi: what! you fell down the stairs? did you break anything? are you hurt?*
*pragya: three days later is a little late for these questions! but waise the only thing that broke was my heart, when you came home and didn't believe me*
*abhi falls to his knees. pleads: i'm sorry...i should have believed you...forgive me chashmish, this whole thing has made me crazy...when i saw him that close to you i...my brain shut down. i'm sorry!*
*pragya mutters: mann kar raha hai aap ke balcony se bhar phek ne ka. too bad i can't lift you.* (i feel like throwing you over the balcony outside)
*abhi: i'm sorry...i didn't hear what you said?*
*pragya: i said you're infuriating and i don't want to forgive you and the least you could do is get me remarried to someone hot.
*abhi: WHAT.*
*pragya: but i know that's more than you can manage so i will settle for...oh, a month's worth of apologies*
*abhi: uhh...ok?*
*pragya: and you have to leave that chudail and take me to switzerland.*
*abhi: switzerland?*
*pragya: and we will film our own MMS but it will stay private.*
*abhi is shocked O.O!! but a little intrigued...!*
*pragya: waise aap ko haq jataana tha na? well i agree but my condition is switzerland.* (you wanted to assert your rights didn't you?)
*abhi: haq jataana tha matlab?* (what do you mean assert my rights?)
*pragya frowns and says: yaad nahin hain? naashe ki harkaton bhool gaya? it figures, my damn life...* (you don't remember? forgot what you did while drunk?)
*abhi: do you mean when i was drunk i tried to - i came to you and -?"
*pragya: yes. and i threw you out.*
*abhi: so nothing happened?*
*pragya: nothing happened.*
*abhi: good. i don't want to be drunk when we - well waise do we have a deal chashmish? no more stupid talk of ending yourself or divorce?*
*pragya: well i dunno, do we have a deal? no more tanu and no more stupid talk about marrying suresh?*
*abhi: yes, yes we have a deal! i will text tanu that we're over, right now.*
*pragya: shabaash aap ko aakal aaye. try not to see her again. in the meantime i am going to take a bath to get rid of this oily sick feeling i have of you trying to throw me at suresh.* (well done, you've gained some wisdom)
*abhi: i'm sorry...can i help?*
*pragya: book the tickets for switzerland.*
*abhi foresees a long future of bowing to his biwi's every small wish. he doesn't mind the vision. abhi says: yes, dear...*
the end!
Love Friendship Dating and Relationships
Bindi
622