Part 9
"Ashutosh. Am I disturbing you?"
"Mrs. Verma? What a pleasant surprise! Please come in," Ashutosh welcomed Nandini warmly into his office.
"I'm sorry. I have come without appointment."
"Come on. This isn't the Prime Minister's Office. You are welcome anytime."
"That's so sweet of you. I had come to pick Nidhi up for a shopping sojourn! I thought I'd say 'hi' to you too."
"That was really good thought. I am so happy to see you here. What would you take? Coffee? Tea?"
"Nothing. Don't bother with formalities. Nidhi would be waiting for me."
"Still..."
"Listen. I had to ask you something."
"Yeah?"
"Do you mind my dragging you into our social circle?"
"What kind of question is that? No. Of course not. It's a pleasure, in fact."
"That's great. Then you shouldn't decline my invitation to you for a dinner tomorrow evening?"
"What's the occasion?"
"No occasion. Just thought you could join me and Nidhi for dinner. It'd be a change for all of us."
"Does Nidhi know?"
"Does either of us need her permission for this?"
"You are too clever with words Mrs. Verma," Ashutosh laughed slightly, "No. We don't need her permission. I'd be happy to join you."
"Great then. 8 pm. Tomorrow. I look forward to seeing you."
--
They were having coffee after dinner when Nidhi got a call. She looked at the number and told Nandini, "It's Anji Mom. I will be back in a while."
"Sure."
"Ashutosh. I wanted to thank you for being a friend and mentor to Nidhi. She really needs one."
"You are embarrassing me by thanking for that. It's..."
"She's my daughter. And I have been a friend to her more than a mother. I know her strengths and weaknesses. Her father didn't live long enough to be there for her. She didn't have a responsible man in her life while growing up. Despite my best efforts, I couldn't do anything to fill that gap in her life. She has suffered because of that. She needs a strong, guiding hand. Can I extract a selfish promise from you? Can you promise me to look after her?"
"You are worried about something. What is it?" Observant by nature, her anxiety did not skip Ashutosh' attention.
"She doesn't know about it yet. But I'm not going to live long. I am suffering from breast cancer. I can't hide for long though. Soon enough, if I don't tell her, my condition would."
"Oh!" Ashutosh was so shocked that he could hardly say anything.
"Sorry to bring you in between all this. But I'm a selfish mother..."
"Don't say that. In fact, I have to thank you for trusting me so much. It means a lot for me. Really!"
"Thanks Ashutosh. I will tell her soon enough. Till then keep this a secret. But please promise me that you will look after her after I'm gone. She is intelligent and quite mature too. But she does have tendency to stumble. And I'd die peacefully, if I know someone is there to support her on those occasions."
"I promise Mrs. Verma, I promise! You must not tax yourself with any worries. You have raised a responsible daughter and..." He paused because they heard Nidhi's footsteps. She was coming back.
"Everything okay?" Nidhi sensed the tension in the room. But Ashutosh managed the situation.
"Yes. Of course. Nidhi. Can I trouble you for another cup of coffee?" Ashutosh said.
"Oh! That's no trouble at all. I will get one. Mom. Shall I get one for you too?"
"Yes dear. That would be awesome."
Ashutosh quickly turned to Nandini to complete his assurance, "I will be with her as her friend. Always. You have nothing to worry about." He had to blink back his tears as he grasped the gravity of the situation.
"Thank you," Nandini pressed Ashutosh' hands in gratitude.
--
Nidhi panicked for a moment as she slowly opened her eyes. Everything around her was a blur and the place felt unfamiliar. Slowly her vision and head cleared and she saw her mother, sitting with her eyes closed on a sofa. She looked around and could make out that she was in a hospital room. She could not recall what had happened. She called out to Nandini in a feeble voice, "Mom!"
Nandini immediately opened her eyes and rushed to her, "Nidhi. You are awake. How are you feeling?"
"I... I... What happened? How did I reach here?"
"Oh! Don't bother. Are you feeling all right?"
Nidhi had to think for a few moments to decide how she was feeling. Then she realized that she was hurting. Especially her shoulders and her head. She felt confused and scared. She wanted something badly and she had no clue what it was. She started crying.
"What happened, Nidhi? Is it hurting? Talk to me dear."
"I am scared. What has happened to me? Am I dying?"
"Hush! Don't be silly. It was just a small accident. You are all right now. Please calm down. I need to call the doctor."
Nidhi tried, but her nervousness and confusion just wouldn't go away. She needed something. What was it? She kept crying. Nandini was perplexed. Crying could be no help to her health.
Just then Ashutosh walked in with a packet of medicines and a cup of coffee in his hands. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Nidhi awake and crying. Nandini looked at him helplessly.
"What happened?" He kept the medicines and coffee on a nearby table and rushed to her bedside, "Why are you crying Nidhi?"
When Nidhi saw him, she felt like she got what she wanted. It was strange feeling. It made no sense. But she felt an urge to go forward and hug him. She was physically in no position to even move. And even if she had been physically fit, there would be a huge mental barrier is doing something like that. But just seeing him around had a calming effort on her. Her nervousness subsided.
"Ashutosh. Please be with her. I will call the doctor."
Ashutosh nodded and sat beside her, while Nandini left to get the doctor. As soon as he was within reach, Nidhi brought her hand forward and clutched his. He was unsure for a moment about how to react. Then he first patted her hand and then her forehead.
"Calm down Nidhi. Everything is all right. Why are you crying?"
"I was scared."
"Now you are not, right?"
"No."
"Then stop crying," he used his free hand to wipe her tears softly, "and tell me is it hurting?"
"Slightly."
"It will be all right. The doctor is coming."
"I'm sorry. I behaved like a kid."
"That's not a problem. Kids are adorable. But you did alarm you mother. Now you must behave yourself before her, okay?"
Nidhi smiled, albeit faintly due to the pain and weakness.
Nandini walked in with the doctor by then.
"Thank God! You have stopped crying."
"I am sorry Mom. I scared you. I was nervous. I still can't remember how it happened."
"That's normal," the doctor said, "We tend to block out bad memories to cope with them. Don't worry about it. You might remember later. And even if you do not, it doesn't matter. It was a road accident. But you look fine now."
"My body pains. Especially my head and shoulders."
"We will do the tests. But most likely you just need to rest for a while more. Please have her eat something," the doctor addressed Nandini, "And then give her the medicines. They will help reduce her pain and also help her sleep."
"Sure."
"Mom. You look tired. Why don't you go home and rest? I'm fine here. You can come in the evening when they discharge me," Nidhi said after having her food, "I will be sleeping till then anyway."
"She is right Mrs. Verma," Ashutosh agreed, "Please go home and take rest. I will be here."
"No Sir. You would also need rest."
"Don't be silly Nidhi. I'm fine. Mrs. Verma, please. You also need to look after yourself." Nandini knew that he was referring to her own deteriorating health. She nodded quietly as she gave medicines to Nidhi, "Fine. I will come in the evening. I'm sorry for all the trouble Ashutosh."
"Don't be. I am not the one in trouble. Nidhi is. She needs to be looked after. And for that you must remain healthy yourself."
--
Nidhi closed her eyes after Nandini left. She was trying to understand her feelings immediately after gaining consciousness. Seeing her mother had comforted her, but she had still wanted something... Rather wanted somebody. She had wanted Ashutosh to be there. Why? That longing for him didn't make sense then. Unless... Unless... she was... It felt weird. What was happening to her? Mom... Crying... Laughing... Dr. Mathur... Walking in with medicine... Comforting her... Scolding her... It was all mixed up. Sedatives had taken over.
--
Nandini as well as Ashutosh noticed a change in Nidhi after she came back from the hospital. Nandini found her to be extremely silent and tense. But she attributed it to the fact that the semester was coming to an end. And she had to work hard to make up for the classes she could not take during her hospital stay apart from checking the final submissions of the assignments and the projects and preparing the papers for the final exams. She decided to let her be until she was done with the semester and could relax during her vacation. At the same time she was running out of time. Her condition was deteriorating day by day and she had to tell Nidhi about her illness. But waiting for a couple of weeks more would not hurt, she decided and stepped back.
But Ashutosh was puzzled with her behavior. She seemed to get edgy in his presence. She was withdrawing from him and avoided meeting him or talking to him beyond what was absolutely necessary. While working late nights, if he asked her for coffee, she politely refused saying she preferred finishing the work early and going home.
Once he saw her leaving the office late at night.
"Leaving?" he asked.
"Yeah."
"You have just recovered from the accident. You shouldn't be working this late and take so much of stress."
"I needed to finish grading the projects apart from the exam papers. I have no option."
"It's quite late now. Let me drop you home," he thought of offering his help in grading while driving her home.
"No. I am fine. Driver is there," she said and left before he could say anything else.
He saw her leaving in her car from his window. She was driving it herself. There was no driver.
--
"You wanted to see me, Sir?" Nidhi came to his office after reading the e-mail from him.
"Yes," he waited for her to come in before continuing, "Since when have you started lying to me?"
"Sorry?"
"Why did you lie about your driver being here yesterday night?"
Her face flushed at first due to embarrassment. But after that she suddenly grew angry, "So what if I went alone? Can't I take care of myself? Or do you think of me as a child? That's what it is, right? I am a child. Someone who always needs to be told what is right and what is wrong. Someone who cannot do anything right on her own? Someone who needs to be protected? Who can't look after herself? An immature kid?"
"Nidhi, where did that come from?"
"Right from my student days. You disliked everything I did. And now you are working hard to do your duty to correct me."
"Nidhi!" Ashutosh was astonished and for a moment didn't know what to say. He shook his head and gathered himself together, "You are making no sense whatsoever. What has happened? Why are you talking like this?"
"It doesn't matter. You won't understand. But just remember this. I'm not a child. So, don't try to mother me."
Ashutosh also lose his cool at that, "Stop this 'child' business, will you? No - you are not a child and I had never seen you as one. As far as I am concerned, you are a grown up woman, who is intelligent enough; a woman who is... mature for her age and charming and attractive. What did you say? I won't understand. Nidhi, you are the one who doesn't understand. You do not understand why I do whatever I do. Yes - I worry about you, I care for you. But the reason is that I am in love with you, since the first time..." Ashutosh stopped. He realized that he had spoken more than he ever intended to. The regret showed up on his face and Nidhi looked at him wide-eyed. Was all of this a dream?
"What did you say?" she had to reconfirm that.
Ashutosh was completely at loss on how to deal with the situation. "I'm sorry. Nidhi. Please don't get me wrong. It's all a... Oh God! How do I explain it? Please forget I said anything. I promise I won't repeat that ever again... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry..."
Just then someone knocked at his office door. He tried to appear calm as he said, "Come in." It was some student who had come in. Ashutosh looked at Nidhi helplessly. She also looked back at him for a few moments and then left his room.
--
Edited by sharmishtha02 - 13 years ago
Health and Fitness
