I know we have discussed a lot on how Ishwari was responsible for the marriage failure. After seeing Bijou's action in today's episode. I want to pen down few things from life, why I think Bijoy was also responsible for this. It is just my POV.
I mentioned in some other thread few months back when my parents visited us, I introduced them to Kuch Rang. I am very close to my dad compared to my mom. I usually discuss everything with my dad. This is around the time before Dev and Sona's marriage. I really liked the way Bijoy did not comprise against Ishwari just because they are from girls side. I liked it as my dad is completely opposite of that. In fact I told my dad that all girls parents should be like Bijoy. 😆
However after Dev and Sona's marriage I slowly realized that Bijoy is little extreme.
I find Kuch Rang is very real and can relate to my life in some extent. When I got married, I went through similar kind of incident that Sona had. I find most of mother in laws are like Ishwari, maybe not that extreme, but you can see similar qualities of Ishwari in them. I don't want to get in to detail, what all my experiences were ...some those were exactly like what they showed in Kuch Rang.
My dad thinking is exactly like Asha, used to advise "It is always difficult during intial years. You can't expect changes in overnight. It takes time. You can't expect your husband to understand you, take your stand against his mom" I really hated my dad advice at that time.
During the first year of marriage, I tried to change myself according to my inlaws expectation even though I did not believe in their views. Then slowly, I understood you really can't impress them by changing yourself.
For me, I am independent professional working women, why I should adjust? Why can't my husband? For that my dad told me "You don't realize, even your husband has changed for you.. but you will not see that"
My dad knew that my husband is very good person. He always used to say "as long as your husband loves you and gives respect, then other things you can manage with time. Always remember it is very easy to break the relationship, but difficult to repair"
I really liked Sona helping her parents financially when they were in need. I also did that for my parents. I love how realistically they showing it in the serial. Usually girls, when they help their parents, they don't share it with husband. It is not like we don't trust your partner, but because girls they don't want their husband to have a different opinion on their parents. But at the same I did not like when she hid about when she started her company with her brother. I think that Sona would have shared with Dev because that was a major decision.
Ok, coming to my point, when My parents didn't mind taking my help but they never wanted it in the expense of my marriage.
When the slapgate happened, I was surprised hearing the Bijoy's dialogue to Dev - "I will not forget this slap, I expect my daughter also never forget this slap."
When Sona was in her parents' house, I was surprised to see no one from Sona's house worried about what Sona's family must have thinking...No one suggested her that she should at least talk to Dev. I can understand they were in shocking state and their pride was hurt. Dixits insulted them. But as parents, you also think about your daughter, right?
I did not like that fact that Boses sent Sona to return the check. I think, Sourab should have returned the check. Again, I was surprised when Asha said no DIL have done that what their daughter is doing.
When Sona came back after retuning the check, Bijoy was telling Sona: "Will we get this house back?" Sona promised them that they will get this house back. I was wondering, what was Bijoy's expectation?
After the slap gate was happened.. Looking at all these, I can see Bijoy basically wanted Sona to break all ties with Dev and take care of them.
Another thing, when Dev came to apology Bijoy with sweets . . . Bijoy insults Dev, when Asha tries to say - Dev is their Jamai...Bijoy says, Asha is his wife..He expects Asha to support Bijoy because she is his wife. I always wondered. . .why he did not say the same thing to his daughter, you should support your husband.
That is why I always thought, Dev and Sona's relation broke the day the slappage was happened. The prenup, Vicky throwing them out of their house, it just addition to those...
Unknowingly/knowingly Bijoy wanted Sona to fight for their insult. Actually Sona basically took the responsibility of the daughter. Sona is just like Dev, she kept her parents pride above her marriage.
Before this leap, I was discussing with my dad. He told the same thing. What is the pride in the expense of your daughter's happiness?
I can understand now, my dad always showed me right path when it was needed. I am so glad I listened to my dad. I have been married for 13 years...my MIL is better with time her insecurity is reduced. My husband also learned how to balance between wife and mother. As my dad said it didn't happen overnight. It took couple of years. Thanks to Kuch Rang, looking at Dev I understood my husband situation better now. I pity those guys, who will completely sandwiched between two important ladies in their life.
I saw SBS video where Sona comes to Dixit house with baby. Happy to see that she tried to contact Dev. I really want to see, did Sona's parents ever ask her to rethink her decision? Because even they clearly know that Dev always loved Sona.
I never tried to analysis Ishwari...why she is like that. It is better to ignore, than thinking about her. Only time will help ...That is what I did in my life too...
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Indian Mythology
