Golden Standards!!! EDITED!!!

Page

Next Last

Tia.0

@Tia.0

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 8 years ago

I was going to post this as a reply to my last post, then I decided that this deserves its own post.

Criminal Harassment: Unsolicited annoying, alarming or abusive conduct or words which are threatening, and which are prohibited by law.

Stalking: Unwanted or obsessive attention by an individual or group towards another person. Stalking behaviors are related to harassment and intimidation and may include following the victim in person or monitoring them. The term stalking is used, with some differing definitions, in psychiatry and psychology, and also in some legal jurisdictions as a term for a criminal offense.

Vindictive Behaviour: Someone with an enduring need for vengeance. People who are prone to vindictive behavior have a high level of negative emotions, and often take out their anger by hurting their loved ones in some way, via psychological or physical abuse and manipulation.

Vindictiveness is also commonly a result of a personality disorder such as borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder. Borderline personality disorder is also characterized by excessive and impulsive behaviors, emotional instability, a strong fear of abandonment, self-destruction, paranoid thoughts and unstable self-awareness. Narcissistic personality disorder may include an exaggerated sense of self-value, lack of empathy, self-centeredness, repressed aggression, hatred, envy, paranoid and suspicious thoughts and behavior. A vindictive personality can negatively impact social, family and work relationships.

I didn't make them up. Just Google the terms.

Now in movies, Darr, Daraar, Anjam - Three movies which showed stalkers as villain.

In Darr, Shahrukh tries to kill the husband of the woman he claims to love to get the woman. No one came out of the theatre saying, Rahul really loved Kiran, Kkkiran should have been more understanding.

In Daraar and Agnishakshi, the wife runs away from a possessive ex-husband faking her death. The husband turns into a stalker. No one said Nana Patekar or Arbaaz Khan were in love.

In Anjaam, Rahul stalks and when he could not get her, he marries a woman who reminds him of Shivani. He changes her name to Shivani. Yet when he meets Shivani again who had a family by then, he kills her entire family and sends her to jail. He also claimed he loved her. But none of the audience did.

But then stalking is the action of the villain, no?

Now watch this,

https://youtu.be/kuEeCAnB3EI

https://youtu.be/vvLBXO94EfA

They are not new concept for us,

https://youtu.be/5g6_KBNmunE

https://youtu.be/EjTv6xrE5J0

https://youtu.be/HE5zJ2uU5Q0

Because everyone knows that when hero does it, it's not stalking, it's love.

In real life, no one tells you, hey, this guy who is harassing you is the hero. So be understanding and let him show his love. In real life, your family will call police.

Some people claimed that Dev became cool after leap.

Depends on your definition of cool.

Wearing ripped jeans, leather jacket, shades and a shitty attitude is not cool, wearing baggy jeans, mismatched socks, nerdy glasses and respectful attitude is cool.

Insulting and humiliating a woman (or any person) because of what imagined slight she did to you is not cool, respecting her wish to move on and either moving on yourself or staying away is cool.

Hurting the person you claim to love because they didn't do what you wanted them to do is not cool, letting them go because now you have moved on and so did they, is cool.

Being a coward who never takes responsibility for his action and blames everyone else for their pathetic life is not cool, being a gentleman who takes responsibility for his actions, learns from them and never repeats the same mistake twice is cool.

Making a woman shed tears in pain, dispair and sorrow is not cool, making a woman shed tears of happiness and gratitude for having you in her life is cool.

Now that reminds a quote of Swami Vivekananda.

Once a foreigner (probably British) asked him, "Why you don't wear clothes like a proper gentleman?"

He replied, "In your country clothes makes a gentleman. In our country, character makes a gentleman."

That's the golden standard of a man. If you are dreaming of your prince charming, aim for that man. Even if he is not as perfect as your imagination, as long as he comes close enough, you still got a better life partner than Dev Dixit.

P.S. Tomorrow is our 5 year anniversary. So I will be off and on periodically based on what we do tomorrow other than go out on our date. Have a great weekend.

This morning's post: http://www.india-forums.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=4789897

P.S. Just found out that I passed my course. Now I am Canadian Securities Certified. Thanks for all your wishes and support. It meant a lot. You guys are the Golden Standard.

Edited by tia.o - 8 years ago

Quote

Frequent Posters

AngelsFlyAlone

@AngelsFlyAlone

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

Happy Anniversary in advance Tia di!!! So thankful that you wrote this oustanding post. Will write up my response to all these words of wisdom in a while. Love you so much for yet another eye opener as always.

Edited by AngelsFlyAlone - 8 years ago

Quote

Looks like you are new here. Register for free, learn and contribute.

Tia.0

@Tia.0

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 8 years ago

Thank you. Have a great weekend yourself. 😊

Originally posted by: AngelsFlyAlone
Happy Anniversary in advance Tia di!!! So thankful that you wrote this oustanding post. Will write up my response to all these words of wisdom in a while. Love you so much for yet another eye opener as always.

Quote

1109060

Suspended

Posted: 8 years ago

Happy anniversary Di... Well like I said Indian TV needs to stop glorifying stalking in the name of bad boy or grey shades of male lead... Y dont they show real redemption? Instead they would show dev helping sona in her career in the name of redemption... That is y I m quite pissed bcoz women don't need men to be successful? U know y I am bitter towards dev. It is real lyf story. My sis married at 22 to a spineless guy without my parents permission... Leaving her MBA course when she was topper... Later she realised what big mistake she committed... Then later she mend her ways n today have a set of her own boutiques n my jiju also came out of her mother's claws. N realised he has his daughter to look after n got some sense... But it was hard struggle. Women don't need men to be successful!!! Also I told u abt guy In my college who burned himself after repeated no from girl for so many days. In the end everyone started blaming girls n u know mostly other girls were blaming her...

Edited by deepakloveskat - 8 years ago

Quote

Tia.0

@Tia.0

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 8 years ago

Thank you. Very sorry to hear about the incident in your college and what your sister went through. These are real people who suffered for the same reason CVs are glorifying on screen. Imagine if a victim of domestic abuse sees manhandling of women glorified on screen or a woman struggling through infertility sees the heroine being treated like a broodmare by the hero and his family. How would those women feel? But TRP comes from all this. Humiliation of women sells and worse, other women buys them in the name of Love, tradition, culture.

Such a sad case.

Originally posted by: deepakloveskat
Happy anniversary Di... Well like I said Indian TV needs to stop glorifying stalking in the name of bad boy or grey shades of male lead... Y dont they show real redemption? Instead they would show dev helping sona in her career in the name of redemption... That is y I m quite pissed bcoz women don't need men to be successful? U know y I am bitter towards dev. It is real lyf story. My sis married at 22 to a spineless guy without my parents permission... Leaving her MBA course when she was topper... Later she realised what big mistake she committed... Then later she mend her ways n today have a set of her own boutiques n my jiju also came out of her mother's claws. N realised he has his daughter to look after n got some sense... But it was hard struggle. Women don't need men to be successful!!! Also I told u abt guy In my college who burned himself after repeated no from girl for so many days. In the end everyone started blaming girls n u know mostly other girls were blaming her...

Quote

Pehchaan.Kaun

@Pehchaan.Kaun

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Tia. Wonderful Post. Let me come back to it.

Meanwhile, copying pasting my reply from another thread about being 'progressive' and accept Dev's philandering ways -

*****************

This is exactly what I feel, how can they call this guy a ML ? 🤢 He is the worst example of creepy guys out there in the street who women are scared of !

Now coming to the thought of Progression question as raised by Push-Pull. PP are you talking about equality here ? Sorry CVs dont understand this concept. 😃 And which even more laughworthy is - this philandering way of Dev is being equated with 'progressive' thinking 🤣 I mean could one BE more delusional ? When we talk about western countries being progressive, it does not indicate to the fact of people sleeping with each other or people showing off their body parts. It's the MENTALITY which we talk about. It's the sense of equality which we refer to. Yes, equality, in worldwide is a raging topic and even the first world countries lack it. But when I say they are progressive, I mean their way of seeing things, their way of treating everyone as an individual and dealing with respect. If Dev's way is called as being 'progressive', then let him follow this in western countries, treating a girl as shit as per his own convenience, he will be shown rotting in jail. 🥱 People go on dates, they spend time together to know each other, they INFORM each other about their expectations, if things turn out to be good, they take it to next step, else they break up with mutual consent ---- THIS is what progressive thought is. People wear all kind of dresses, but no one bothers to disturb them, no one checks out them from top to bottom, no one lusts on them to make them feel like an object ---- THIS is what progressive thought is. It's the independence and respect which is progressive about them.

Trust CVs to be thickhead enough to equate progression with sleeping around. 🥱 In true sense, Sona is the one who has followed the path of being Progressive in my eyes. She doesn't need anyone to save her heart. Even before their proposal during Dev-Natasha engagement, Sona was miserable, but she held herself high. After their first break-up, she still held herself high. She wont have never even in dreams become like this scumbag. THAT is progressive. Independence. What Dev is doing, is called crass and sadak-chaap behaviour which is anything but progression. In fact his dealing with women as objects/toys have pushed him towards more of a medieval era where women were treated as sex-weapon and nothing more than that. Dev's behaviour is exactly so.

Pity to the CVs who dont even know the meaning of progression and thinks this is what 'progressive' society does. 🥱

Edited by Pehchaan.Kaun - 8 years ago

Quote

sameera

@Sameera776

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

I agreed whtever u said but No comments about Bechara Dev coz whatever he does will be considered in viewers eyes as his unconditional,selfless love for Sonakshi be it insults her in inside room/house or now he has becomes cool so he insults her in public.This is the way of showing Dev dixits unconditional love for his ex wife...Anyway Happy 5 th Anniversary to u nd ur Hubby 🥳

Quote

Pehchaan.Kaun

@Pehchaan.Kaun

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Tia first of all a very happy 5th anniversary. 😳 Enjoy your day and good luck for the exam as well. 😛

Now about cool. Yeah. This distorted idea of 'cool' has been exaggerated to no extent in Indian Cinema and Television. I remember in our childhood, Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Rahul (SRK) used to wear a chain written 'COOL' 😆 But, he used to feel ashamed to acknowledge that he visits temple every Tuesday. Funnily contradictory.

To me, a cool person is who will never let others thoughts impact you, a cool person is who does what he believes to be right, who doesn't lose his/her inner peace i.e. coolness due to any external provocation/circumstances, who can manage things smartly without creating a scene or hyper-ventilating, a person who has rock-solid confidence in himself about who they are, who doesn't need to take help of external factors like alcohol, one who doesnt have to resort to lies and secrecy to hide his activities with the fear of being judged.

This avatar of Dev post-leap, I cannot term it as progressive OR cool anything. This is JUST cheapness, JUST classless behaviour and NOTHING more than that in my eyes. He cannot face the reality of himself without alcohol, remains drunk almost 24x7, hides his emotions, attacks people, goes behind their back, creates drama. Anything but cool. Let's not mix cheap criminal activities with the idea of coolness or 'progressive' thoughts or traits in character.

Quote

Tia.0

@Tia.0

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 8 years ago

Excellent, excellent point. You and I have pretty similar way of thinking. This is what I wrote in another post.

Dressing up in short dresses and going to parties are not being progressive, having a choice to wear the clothes you want and go with complete freedom to wherever you want without worrying about getting molested or raped is progressive.

Enjoying with your friends are basic rights, but some men deciding based on what you wear that you are easy game and attack you is regressive.

Letting your daughter work after marriage is not progressive, understanding that it's her own life and hence only she has the right to make her career decisions and that your permission is not required to make career choices just because she is a Bahu and not a damad, is progressive.

Taunting your daughter-in-law is not progressive, but knowing that if you hurt your son's wife you hurt your son, hence treat her with respect is progressive.

Loving someone for their independence is not progressive, not taking decisions on their behalf thus totally disrespecting their said independence is progressive.

And as you said, sleeping with multiple partner is a choice, right or wrong, depends on the expectations of both sides.

But respecting the person you are with and being committed to that person at that time while you are in the relationship, however long it may be or let them go is progressive.

Originally posted by: Pehchaan.Kaun
Tia. Wonderful Post. Let me come back to it.
Meanwhile, copying pasting my reply from another thread about being 'progressive' and accept Dev's philandering ways -

*****************
This is exactly what I feel, how can they call this guy a ML ? 🤢 He is the worst example of creepy guys out there in the street who women are scared of !

Now coming to the thought of Progression question as raised by Push-Pull. PP are you talking about equality here ? Sorry CVs dont understand this concept. 😃 And which even more laughworthy is - this philandering way of Dev is being equated with 'progressive' thinking 🤣 I mean could one BE more delusional ? When we talk about western countries being progressive, it does not indicate to the fact of people sleeping with each other or people showing off their body parts. It's the MENTALITY which we talk about. It's the sense of equality which we refer to. Yes, equality, in worldwide is a raging topic and even the first world countries lack it. But when I say they are progressive, I mean their way of seeing things, their way of treating everyone as an individual and dealing with respect. If Dev's way is called as being 'progressive', then let him follow this in western countries, treating a girl as shit as per his own convenience, he will be shown rotting in jail. 🥱 People go on dates, they spend time together to know each other, they INFORM each other about their expectations, if things turn out to be good, they take it to next step, else they break up with mutual consent ---- THIS is what progressive thought is. People wear all kind of dresses, but no one bothers to disturb them, no one checks out them from top to bottom, no one lusts on them to make them feel like an object ---- THIS is what progressive thought is. It's the independence and respect which is progressive about them.

Trust CVs to be thickhead enough to equate progression with sleeping around. 🥱 In true sense, Sona is the one who has followed the path of being Progressive in my eyes. She doesn't need anyone to save her heart. Even before their proposal during Dev-Natasha engagement, Sona was miserable, but she held herself high. After their first break-up, she still held herself high. She wont have never even in dreams become like this scumbag. THAT is progressive. Independence. What Dev is doing, is called crass and sadak-chaap behaviour which is anything but progression. In fact his dealing with women as objects/toys have pushed him towards more of a medieval era where women were treated as sex-weapon and nothing more than that. Dev's behaviour is exactly so.

Pity to the CVs who dont even know the meaning of progression and thinks this is what 'progressive' society does. 🥱

Quote

Tia.0

@Tia.0

Sparkler

+ 6

Posted: 8 years ago

#10

Yep, the poor man is sho sad that big baddy wifey left him and his abusive family.

Sonakshi was right today, "He had everything, but he lost them and now he enjoys ruining other people's happiness."

Originally posted by: Sameera776
I agreed whtever u said but No comments about Bechara Dev coz whatever he does will be considered in viewers eyes as his unconditional,selfless love for Sonakshi be it insults her in inside room/house or now he has becomes cool so he insults her in public.This is the way of showing Dev dixits unconditional love for his ex wife...Anyway Happy 5 th Anniversary to u nd ur Hubby 🥳

Quote

1 2 3 4 5 6

Golden Standards!!! EDITED!!!

Related Topics

Explore Topics