Those Twisted Dixits: Part II - Page 3

Originally posted by: thedramaqueen

Great post. You have a way with words. Many of us have been trying to say this for weeks now. You summarised it all. Golden words

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This show is doing a great job explaining this new brand of romantic love, which translates to successful marriages, to a generation that saw it as a purely impractical thing, at odds with society and worldly wisdom. It shows how such a love can actually enrich the day-to-day when both parties understand each other's issues and limitations and love each other anyway.

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Originally posted by: mena_k

Wonderful post and take on last weeks episodes.

Neha is a traumatised soul. The memories of childhood plays a major role in defining what we are today. A persons character both good and bad are related to what upbringing and conditions one was subjected to as a child. Though every person learns from his or her experiences as an adult but the basic framework of ones persona comes from his/her childhood. I never believed Neha's problem was money anytime, but love which she never got from her mother. Ishwari was never kind to her, never had time for her, not when they were poor, not now when they are rich. The feeling of being neglected is what led her to her decision to marry Ranveer. Yes she wanted love something which her own family failed to give. Ishwari never allowed any bonding between Dev and any of his sisters, which might have had helped Neha get over the feeling of being dejected. What Ishwari did to her as a child and doing now has nothing to do with them being poor. Being alone in a family really hurts, especially when you see someone so close getting all the love and care and you having none.

Perhaps what Neha needs from Ishwari (being the only faulty person here), is her mother accepting and for once apologizing for what she could or could not give her. To just sit with her and have a real mother-daughter talk without bringing in her own misery or what she did for Dev. Ishwari loves portraying her image of someone who has sacrificed everything for Dev, and she loves to keep people around who keep praising her as the same. But may be by seeing Ishwari did feel her pain could ease Neha's pain as a starting point. I am not saying anything as a punishment or putting Ishwari down in front of her daughter, but when you are at a fault, immaterial to what relation status you are, sometimes the best way to deal with a situation is accepting the truth. Ishwari was wrong, not for asking Neha to take care of her younger siblings, but for neglecting a child and choosing the other. Neha needs to be felt she means something to someone. She didn't feel like anything for Ishwari and now she wants to fill that void by being the only important one for Ranveer. Again, a choice which comes off as a direct result of what she felt all her life in her own house or was made to feel by her mother. Even a plant grows better If cared for in a better way with love.

Originally posted by: desigirl987

Sam , I am tired of using brilliant to describe ur posts , and searching for synonyms !!! Thank you for giving the link to previous analysis , which I had missed ... And psyched to find out how well you analyzed it back then too ...👏👏👏 I had a hectic week and really sorry as I couldn't revisit ur last post , but I'm also glad because you expressed some of my thoughts beautifully in this ... Please bear with me if this turn out to be a long one . 😉

"I disagree slightly here, especially where it comes to Neha. While I believe that her intention was to be purely calculative in using Neha to stop Dev from going on his honeymoon (when the thought of separation from her did not deter him), bringing Neha into it, and the subsequent backlash of memories and trauma is something Ishwari did not anticipate. "

I totally agree with you there ... Thank God someone thought the same !!! Since the marriage I've been noticing some of Ishwari's strange reactions ... Sometimes I tend to think she is projecting some of her own feelings to someone else as a coping mechanism ... Like telling Sona "it will be strange for you , from auntiji to mom" or asking Sona to go home as she needs a change of scene when I thought it was in fact Ishwari who needed some space after Dev's unexpected confrontation ... And her panic hearing the honey moon and convincing herself Dev cannot stay without her was another instance ... But Dev's reaction to the same was not expected by her at all ... As you said that's when she was forced to use Neha's excuse , even when I say "forced to " I don't believe she did it intentionally , it was her mind paying trick on her , to distract her from the 'still sinking in reality ' that Dev is moving on happily ... When she took Dev on a guilt trip , she was as miserable as him may be more than him ... But she never took in consideration of Neha's feeling in all these , and she never expected what unraveled afterwards . I was surprised to see the helplessness and genuine guilt on her face seeing Neha's outburst on Sona.(Also isnt it strange that she was feeling bad for Sona for cancellation of the HM but not Dev !!! )

Now about blocking her pain and going back to survival mode , its not easy this time !!! Because Neha is also doing the same technique Ishwari was using , she is channeling her anger and frustration of her present situation to Ishwari and her excruciating past ... When you think about it its funny , Neha was in fact doing the same that Ishwari did and is still doing to Dev, to keep his emotional bonding intact !! But even after going through the torture , Ishwari fails to fathom the hurt it brings each time when she uses the past for her advantage .

Wonderfully put! She does have a habit of projecting her fears onto others so as to not take full responsibility for her own feelings. I still maintain that that is what happens when women are expected to be perfect paragons of virtue and sacrifice also the time... they find indirect ways of getting their way. Ishwari has become an expert at this, but like we have surmised, Neha does not buy it and this throws Ishwari every single time she pays attention to Neha for some external reason.

Neha's happiness - Even when Neha points out to Ranveer the luxurious life comforts which she was used to , she fails to remember she was never happy around them ... She was happy only when she was in love when she thought she found someone who could heal her wounds , who could help her come out of her haunting past . When you compare both Neha and Dev , I feel Neha was more ready to face her past than Dev , she was ready to open up her wounds to Ranveer even though she knew it would hurt where as Dev chose to shut Sona off completely . I believe both Neha and Dev were attracted towards simplicity that Ranveer and Sona brought to their life which was missing in their life . Dev admired how Sona could associate everything as pure black and white , and adored her purity . But somehow that's the same thing that's keeping him from opening up about his past . He is convinced she would not understand the complexity or the baggage that comes with his past , or may be he wanted to protect her from all these . And the fact that Sona chose to advocate "the rightful thing to do " on occasions like Vicky's job or lying to Ishwari also didn't help him either ... But here is how Sona's ability to understand Dev than anyone else came into play . Sona understood his pain and gave him space , still made sure she would be there for him whenever he is ready . She emphasized their friendship even during their romantic getaway because of this , I feel this is exactly where Ranveer failed ... You could see how Dev is warming upto her later and was ready to share his pain after his decision to cancel HM .

Yes! Sona caught on to how to deal with this complexity with much more success than Ranveer, unfortunately. Part of this, is undoubtedly to me, a gender thing. This show has long established a critique of the way our society works, where men are allowed to avoid a lot of emotional complexity so they can be confident in the outside world, and put food on the table. Women are the ones who deal with the complexity on a daily basis... it was true of Dev and Neha, in the beginning, and true of Sona and Ranveer now. Even in Ranveer's family, it's clear that his ideals aren't exactly in like with his mother and bhabhi's wishes... they were over the moon about his new job and encouraged him to find a better living situation after marriage because they understand where Neha is coming from, and that what makes Ranveer happy may not be enough to make Neha happy. Ranveer was also coming around when this eye operation happened and threw Neha into panic about never being first priority.

When Ishwari asked Dev /Sona to stay away from Neha I was reminded of the scene where mamaji burst out at Ishwari seeing the pathetic state of drunken Dev , and she tried to cover up Dev's ears !!!! As you explained as much as Ishwari wants to escape the guilt , she doesn't want a solution because that would require a path she is dreaded to go as it would bring down her perfect mother image .

I am also loving the way they use Neha for drama , she definitely deserved more screen space , but I wish makers maintain the complexities of her character without turning her into vamp for highlighting Sona's goodness .

They haven't done that so far, and I am confident that if there is no interference, they won't do it in future either. Neha and Sona have so much to learn from each other, so I really look forward to their interactions! Maybe Neha will be able to educate Sona on the family's past, given that she understands it so much better than Dev, and will be able to express it.

Ranveer's comparison of Neha with Sona was the last thing she wanted to hear , in her mind Sona is everything she wanted her to be - independent , educated , employed , matured woman whom her brother deeply loves . I like to think even though Dev and her didn't share a strong bond , she always craved for his love and care . So witnessing Sona getting all she ever wanted , is fueling her jealousy !!! I feel Sona's attempts to bond with the Dixit family also may have an adverse effect on Neha .She was not pleased when a panicked Nicky went to Sona , when she Ishwari fainted. Her sisters are the only ones who acknowledged her sacrifices. So in a way she may be threatened by Sona , that even they are replacing her in that house ... But ironically Sona may be the only one who can help her if she allowed her to, as she may have a better perspective in all these as an outsider ...I wish Sona share their struggle during break up time with Neha , and how she could not move on even with the "perfect guy" like Rithvik, you never know Neha may realize she needed his love , and cannot move on and be happy even with the "perfect life" she thinks she wants !!!

I absolutely love this paragraph! So very true, and adds such a wonderful new layer to the Neha-Sona non-relationship. What Neha needs more than anything else is for someone to tell her how dang awesome she is! She may not have the trappings of success that Sona does, but she is no less intelligent, compassionate, and accomplished. Her achievements were just different, given her disadvantages, but she certainly made the most of what she had! Sona has a lot to learn from Neha, and she would be an invaluable ally in the family, were she to find confidence in herself.

Sorry again for a long post !!! Since I got some free time today, I'm piggybacking on your post to share my views !!! Hope you don't mind !!! 😉

Oh god, don't apologise! It was an absolute pleasure! 😃

Originally posted by: pyaaribehna

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/138119688

Please read my post in the above link.

Originally posted by: raji91

nice post...

Originally posted by: Pooja118

I love your analysis about how a story can make a non-lead as the center of plot so that they can showcase the characterization and growth of the lead actors! Wonderful!