Sona's excitement is Ishu's disappointment!

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Push-pull

@Push-pull

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Whatever happened with Sona's plan for a peaceful date away from the Ishwari Nivas has nothing to do with Ishwari... Lying to Ishwari in the intention to take revenge from her is the last thing on Sona's mind, at least in this instance... Sona doesn't even know what's hitting her in the form of Ishwari here... 😉 😆

Sona just wanted to whisk her man away for a while, to share some special moments and also to keep it as a surprise for him... That's all... I am very poor at giving surprises myself, not because I am bad at lying but because I can't contain my own excitement in planning the surprise 😆... So can't say what's the best way to surprise someone...

May be something like "I have a surprise for you, don't ask me what it is" or "I am telling you that I'm taking you to Maamaji's house but it's a lie... Something else wait and see" or "Oh I am so excited... Don't ask me anything.. Just come with me" or "Hola people, I am kidnapping Dev from this house for my own reasons.. No more questions asked"

The list could be endless... And now you know why I am bad at giving surprises... 🤪

Anyway Sona's plan has nothing that concerns anyone in the house (if it's a normal house where we have a newly weds waiting to find some couple moments 😉) because it's all about the husband-wife...

But it doesn't sit well only in Ishwari Nivas... Why?!

Nothing and none in that house is considerate for the newly weds.. Thank God for Rhea😉... Everyone decides to live in their own space, in their own bubble sticking to their own agenda without considering options to give or create a space for the person who has just entered their life... Whether she affects them emotionally or not, her physical presence in that house sure needs a consideration from every human being... They can't ignore the fact that she is there to have her own space as well... Not everything is gonna be the same for everyone in that house... Everyone will sense a change, at different percentage level... That's the fact and everyone has to accept it... It's each and everyone's duty, including Sona, to own the change that a marriage has brought in, and share/create space, as applicable...

Did anything of that sort happened?! Sona is seen trying her hands everywhere... The others are not even making an attempt to keep her part of anywhere... She's completely lost in that new place which is loudly and clearly crying out that nothing will change here and everything will remain the same way, untouched...

If the change is not accommodated gracefully then a forced change which will turn everyone's life upside down.. And that's what gonna happen in Ishwari Nivas... Everyone asked for it... Literally... By knocking the door, walking into the room unannounced, blowing of the candles, etc. etc...🤪

Did Sona even imagine to have her first night to be planned all by herself outside Ishwari Nivas😉?! It IS a big change for her too and if we ask her, even she would be surprised to know that she had to do it when it was never part of her wedding plans... She never had it in her TO DO items...😆 But I'm very very glad that she thought about it and finally DID it with a boost from Rhea... 👏

Now coming to Ishwari...

As a parent I've every right to be protective of my child.. watch out... set rules... be alert and observant for him/her... All only to protect my child from any harm that he/she might end up getting into... All well and good there till it's in the intention of the welfare of the child 👍🏼... The moment I start protecting my position in my child's life, then I am setting myself for a failure... And setting myself for disappointments... And setting myself exposed to hear/see/feel something that I really don't want to...🥱

Expecting the worst and the fear of that happening, I keeping a tab on it, to have a constant check on whether it's gonna happen, will actually promote the behaviors I fear the most... If I am not focusing on my child's new interests and likes, just because it's not in my interest or I don't understand it, then I am only closing my communication channel with my child... Losing the connect with him/her and not allowing myself to learn the growth in him/her, which is like avoiding the inevitable...

Taking too much control over their behavior and decisions or avoiding all conflicts for fear of pushing them away - Either of them isn't gonna help me as a parent, if I'm interested in improving my parenting skills...😉

Sweating over small stuff 🤪and ignoring the big stuff🤔, I am not showing my parenting concern at all... I am not conveying the message that I care for them and I'm there for them when they need me... I am only being too desperate to keep a tab on my child to reemphasize on what's changing in my life... 😆

There was a story shared by a father... The father wanted to be little observant on his kids lifestyle and the happenings in their life... He brought in a family time for themselves with a game.. The "Truth Time"... Everyone sits together that time and take turns to open up their hidden truths, whatever for that week... Nobody says anything when the person is sharing their side of truth... It's just one sided open up like a confession box... No anger, no advice, nothing shared by the others when the truth is out... Even after the time is done, none talks about it... It's only a way to keep the communication channel open amidst the family and understand each others' interests and their growth process... To accept their changes and also to help them be truthful to their change process.. also to give a chance to themselves to fix it all by themselves, unless they need help... Nice game isn't it... 😉 Wait the best part is yet to come... 😃

The family had a teenage girl... And the truths from her aren't that easy for the father to hear week after week... It's all about her dating, boyfriends, kisses, desires, lusts, etc. He had to literally cry once "Please LIE"...😆🤣

Choice is mine - I accept the changes or resist them or ignore them as if nothing is changed or avoid them or assume that there are changes and not dig through them...

What's Ishwari's choice here??!!!

Edited by Push-pull - 8 years ago

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thedramaqueen

@thedramaqueen

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

Agree with you. Posted this on another post. I have more thoughts that I would like to discuss too. Will type up later

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I did not feel bad for Ishwari. After what she did the night before dussera and dussera morning I did not. I posted separately. Will try to link. What was all that "kuch bhi nahi badla" business? Why did she not tell dev that sona was wanting to speak to you, why don't you talk to her before checking your email? Why did she not go to sona's room and tell her Dev was back and sat downstairs if she wanted to speak to him? What was that "sona ko to pata bhi nahi dev kab ghar aaya" business? Why did she no tell Dev that she had sent Sona upstairs?

Some days I feel mami knows Dev better than Ishwari.

In fact, I am hoping Ishwari will be a sport. I am hoping Dev won't say a guilty sorry... instead a sheepish sorry. Ma who sona aur main... no that won't happen. Not yet. Instead Ishwari will bully Miss Goody two shoes into telling her everything. That's the reason they picked Riya. Neha would have given her a piece of her mind (if that chip came off of Neha's shoulder that is), nikki would have been too busy flaunting the resort and elena wouldn't have left this tiny detail about mamaji out of her planning.

I have always seen the grey side of Ishwari. Thursday night and Friday we will see a black side I think.

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sona_naksh

@sona_naksh

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

great post ...
may i know ur name ...
i wrote somewhere else also ...dat ishwari is playing a lost battle here ...she may think shez winning by small victories n manipulations but in long run she ll loose it if she doesnt understand dat mother n wife are not two swords who cant stay togeder ...dey r like dil n dhadkan for a man who need to stay togeder for dat man's sanity ..n if dey dont d person suffering is dat man himself ...here it ll b dev who ll b hurt n d tym ishwari realises it she ll b broken ...
ishwari is so involved in safeguarding her posituon in dev's life dat she realised sona is not snatching her position she is making her own space
but as it is said if you dont learn lessons on ur own ...time teaches u ruthlessly ...

i have a son n i know i have to share him wid everyone ...i know hez nt only my son but someone's grandson someone's nephew ...but ushwari's problem is for her dev is just her son n everyone needs to acknowledge dat she needs to understand sona left her parents her home her siblings n to some extent her identity also ...she has few rights on dev n if u dont wish to share ur son she ll have to snatch him ...

i dont prefer lying whether my parents or in laws but at tyms wen i think dat is is necessary n i want no drama ryt now i do it ...sona dint lie to ishwari deliberately dis tym but in future wen she realises wat is ishwari doing i feel many more lies coming n ishwari is inviting dem ...however bad she feels wen shez lied to

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gmgi

@gmgi

Rocker

Posted: 8 years ago

Wow you are on a roll!!!

Sona didn't do, to intentionally hurt Ishwari. All she wanted was to give a surprise for Dev. To gift her man and herself a memorable day. Ishwari reacted because it was against her agenda. She chose this disappointment by herself. It was her choice only. She wants to live in her past and drag her beta along with her where they were together and interdependent on each other. She is proud of her role which helped her to be on the pedestal. With change she may not be able to compete with others to hold on to her position and so past is the safest bet.

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Anisa

@AnnzSageflower7

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

it's only a big deal because Ishwari made it so. She is dominating over the newlyweds and its smothering them. It's either they tell her to butt out nicely or they sneak out together.

Some people cant figure out what they're doing is wrong. Some do it intentionally, and I dont want to debate where Ishwari is 😆.

But if this had been Dev's idea; taking Sonakshi out for a long drive and dinner, Ishwari would have railroaded the idea, or went along with them.. She is staking her claim over Dev. Maybe she fears that with sex, Dev will even more enamoured to Sonakshi.

it was an innocent surprise for Dev. It was so nice of Riya to suggest and nudge them along. Even Bijoy and Asha laughed it off as a cute thing. Only Ishwari and GKB will make drama out of it. Well it'll only make her look worse off.

It's just a small thing. If she blows it up full of hot air, it's just air. Some embarassment would be felt of course.😆

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Push-pull

@Push-pull

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Originally posted by: thedramaqueen
Agree with you. Posted this on another post. I have more thoughts that I would like to discuss too. Will type up later
Hi
I did not feel bad for Ishwari. After what she did the night before dussera and dussera morning I did not. I posted separately. Will try to link. What was all that "kuch bhi nahi badla" business? Why did she not tell dev that sona was wanting to speak to you, why don't you talk to her before checking your email? Why did she not go to sona's room and tell her Dev was back and sat downstairs if she wanted to speak to him? What was that "sona ko to pata bhi nahi dev kab ghar aaya" business? Why did she no tell Dev that she had sent Sona upstairs?

Some days I feel mami knows Dev better than Ishwari.

In fact, I am hoping Ishwari will be a sport. I am hoping Dev won't say a guilty sorry... instead a sheepish sorry. Ma who sona aur main... no that won't happen. Not yet. Instead Ishwari will bully Miss Goody two shoes into telling her everything. That's the reason they picked Riya. Neha would have given her a piece of her mind (if that chip came off of Neha's shoulder that is), nikki would have been too busy flaunting the resort and elena wouldn't have left this tiny detail about mamaji out of her planning.

I have always seen the grey side of Ishwari. Thursday night and Friday we will see a black side I think.

For Ishu, Sona exists in the house... As a new entry in the name of Dev's wife... But when it comes to Dev, Sona should be a non-existing element... That's what she prefers to maintain... And expects Dev to maintain as well...

Dev-Sona were telling about their evening plan, when Sona stated that they will be delayed and asked her not to wait up, Ishu's look wasn't amicable... She was almost ignoring Sona's statement and wanting to hear anything different from Dev... And when Dev insisted on the same she couldn't help but heed... And Rhea took it over in a different track by overdoing the menu list, Ishu didn't get any chance to ponder over the situation...

Not sure how Ishu will react to them when she gets to know where they had gone from whoever it is... Either she will keep her emotion to herself but will become more watchful of Sona, not giving her leeway... And if she gets to know that Dev himself wasn't aware of this lie/surprise, she'll be happy that Dev has no part in this play... It's upto or own convenience one calls it a surprise or a lie... Anything is in our interpretation. May be she'll see Sona differently as if she purposefully lied to them and would not take this surprise thing in a positive note... Her drama might increase giving her the justification that Sona has started the game of stealing her son away from her 😆...

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Push-pull

@Push-pull

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Originally posted by: sona_naksh
great post ...
may i know ur name ...
i wrote somewhere else also ...dat ishwari is playing a lost battle here ...she may think shez winning by small victories n manipulations but in long run she ll loose it if she doesnt understand dat mother n wife are not two swords who cant stay togeder ...dey r like dil n dhadkan for a man who need to stay togeder for dat man's sanity ..n if dey dont d person suffering is dat man himself ...here it ll b dev who ll b hurt n d tym ishwari realises it she ll b broken ...
ishwari is so involved in safeguarding her posituon in dev's life dat she realised sona is not snatching her position she is making her own space
but as it is said if you dont learn lessons on ur own ...time teaches u ruthlessly ...

i have a son n i know i have to share him wid everyone ...i know hez nt only my son but someone's grandson someone's nephew ...but ushwari's problem is for her dev is just her son n everyone needs to acknowledge dat she needs to understand sona left her parents her home her siblings n to some extent her identity also ...she has few rights on dev n if u dont wish to share ur son she ll have to snatch him ...

i dont prefer lying whether my parents or in laws but at tyms wen i think dat is is necessary n i want no drama ryt now i do it ...sona dint lie to ishwari deliberately dis tym but in future wen she realises wat is ishwari doing i feel many more lies coming n ishwari is inviting dem ...however bad she feels wen shez lied to

Hiya dear... Thanks... You can call me PP for now! 😃

Exactly... It is Ishu who's gonna put her own son in a fix making him to choose... She testing their relationship time and again, is only gonna make things worse... And Dev isn't helping her much there by making her win in short terms, and by covering her up for all her behaviors boosting her to do more and more...

Sona being more flexible with her family and adaptable to the new environment is not helping Ishu either... She would have been happy if Sona feels homesick 😆 But Sona is the happy self trying to make her home in the new place with no second thoughts... She might be missing her home but she's too much in love with her new life to feel anything else... 😉

And what Sona doing so casually out of her newly acquired role, is directly attacking the sensitivity of Ishu's role... And Sona is completely being stupid about it because her mind is not even thinking anything on that line... Hope something happens soon to make Sona sense that.. Because she being blinded to the environment, unknown to the causes of the situations happening around her, is gonna prove more disastrous to her living in this house...

I just hope going forward Sona doesn't be the casual self taking Ishu lightly, because Ishu's sensitivity is limited to her own needs... And Dev's sensibility is limited to his Maa only... And Sona needs the sense and sensibility to mange on her own amidst these two... 😉

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Soumya

@Soumya23

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

Beautiful post yaar...😊

hey seriously are you that bad in hiding????Sooo Cuttteee😊

Good Sona didnt choose any of these above words...otherwise our detective Dev would have easily found out...

Edited by Soumya23 - 8 years ago

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Push-pull

@Push-pull

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

Originally posted by: gmgi
Wow you are on a roll!!!

Sona didn't do, to intentionally hurt Ishwari. All she wanted was to give a surprise for Dev. To gift her man and herself a memorable day. Ishwari reacted because it was against her agenda. She chose this disappointment by herself. It was her choice only. She wants to live in her past and drag her beta along with her where they were together and interdependent on each other. She is proud of her role which helped her to be on the pedestal. With change she may not be able to compete with others to hold on to her position and so past is the safest bet.

But Ish might take it too serious because of her famous sensitive side for her dear bachcha... 😉 And no questioning about that to Dev... Only can hope that the whole lie thing get dismissed for what it actually is - a surprise thing as a secret sneaking out from the busy knocks on their bedroom door😉... And Dev not made feel guilty about hurting Ishu... And Ishu not making a scene about how scared she was not knowing their whereabouts...

@bold: That's some interesting view point... You have put it out very differently... 👏 Ishu wants to hold on to her best form of herself which has driven her family to this proud state and all because of her non-stop dedication... No denying that... That's where even I want Ishu to get her due credit and not want her to be dismissed as an ignorant mother with jealousy or insecurity... She's reluctant to change because she sees her mom-son duo at its best form without any change in that equation... 😉 And not wanting to accept the harsh reality that every marriage brings in... The boy/girl will have to have their own new relationship and needs and dreams to pursue... A BIG CHANGE in existing equations!!!

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Push-pull

@Push-pull

Sparkler

Posted: 8 years ago

#10

Originally posted by: AnnzSageflower7
it's only a big deal because Ishwari made it so. She is dominating over the newlyweds and its smothering them. It's either they tell her to butt out nicely or they sneak out together.
Some people cant figure out what they're doing is wrong. Some do it intentionally, and I dont want to debate where Ishwari is 😆.

But if this had been Dev's idea; taking Sonakshi out for a long drive and dinner, Ishwari would have railroaded the idea, or went along with them.. She is staking her claim over Dev. Maybe she fears that with sex, Dev will even more enamoured to Sonakshi.

it was an innocent surprise for Dev. It was so nice of Riya to suggest and nudge them along. Even Bijoy and Asha laughed it off as a cute thing. Only Ishwari and GKB will make drama out of it. Well it'll only make her look worse off.

It's just a small thing. If she blows it up full of hot air, it's just air. Some embarassment would be felt of course.😆

@bold: Ishu's favorite game to sway in between these two form of people to confuse herself and us... 😆

True that... If Dev had done this all, then it's a different story... Till she gets to know Dev hasn't lied, she's gonna be in her coma state... 😆 BTW Dev had once set their date in his bedroom sending everyone from the family out with different agenda... Ish will never know that side of Dev... 😆

Baaba and Asha - They laughed it off because they assumed that Dev lied to his mom for Sona😉... If they get to know that Sona sneaked Dev out with a secret surprise planned for him, I'm sure they would laugh it out as well... 😉

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Sona's excitement is Ishu's disappointment!

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