Originally posted by: deepsel
Shabaaz! What a brilliant post my dear.! Take a bow! I can feel you have written this with lots of fire in your belly! Just superb!⭐️ One of your best posts! Loving it much! And you have written it so well with passion !
No doubt the series is going through one of the darkest phase here but I assure, you will see the light in the end not because am being optimistic but because of the fact I am enjoying that light right now !!
Yes my blood boiled too not because of the episodes but to the horror of seeing myself in Sona some 13 years ago. Yes I was an independent career woman with an extremely high female ego before marriage, yes I got married to my parents choice, yes I had to go through hell for the first year of marriage, yes I had to support them financially and emotionally but though I had the option of lashing on each insults and walking out, I didn't ...not because I was a doormat but because I have learned life is not without compromises., but because I was matured enough to know that my identity battle is going to be same everywhere I go, but because I have learned when to assert my rights and not, but because most of all I know there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Today am the brain, backbone, whatever you want to call of every professional and personal decision my husband takes. Ofcourse I am not suggesting this is the only way out but merely stating being patient and compromising and not walking out, is not an act of cowardice and failure !!
Exactly! Compromise is not weakness but actually how you grow as person! Maturity and successful and still retaining your identity!
I am genuinely happy for all you younger generation whose marriage has started on the blissful note but please don't generalize every woman who think this track as reality to be doormat and delusional for each of us know what we exactly went through in the same shoe of Sona and achieved !! As for the unmarried , marriage is not always the destination but in case you happen to bound to it , just know that bowing your head before your loved ones is not always an act of disgrace to your self respect !!
Well said!👏 I am loving this highlighted . very very true!
Doormats indeed!- easily they come up with such labellings without a thought ! it boils down to immaturity way of thinking. The fast and furious , its me or the highway type of life will not last too long...
Coming to the episodes, yes they were extremely painful to watch. I had to distract my mind watching older episodes I won't lie but except for the Vicky part I have seen every character behaving the same way in real life. Please understand that I don't condone their behaviors but I do understand why they behaved the way the behaved post marriage!!
Absolutely!
Dev:
He has shown tremendous growth post marriage in the color of Sona's love, giving her space when needed, seeking her opinions, respecting her values until today when he was put in the spot by his mother ! He very well know his wife is right and Vicky deserves the trainee post first and he even tried to reason with Ishwari but his terrifying past showed its ugly head once again. The guy who broke up his love in a second for his mom obviously will succumb to his Mom's order when Ishwari cleverly laced his "eshaan" with guilt of new responsibility (Sona). I am actually very curious when Dev had those words as thought process and he clearly needed a lone space that time. Dev openly wished it from Sona but when it didn't happen, the first human natural instinct is to lash and walk out..he did the same !
So he took the time and made his own decision to fulfill Mom's wish because somewhere deep down he also felt his current financial status is all from the small shelter of protection which came from his Mamaji . It doesn't matter whether Vicky is eligible or not , Dev thinks can take care of his blunders like how he always shoulders responsibilities. This job is a mere eye wash for their guilt of seeing his Mamaji 's family in the lower financial state than them. We can debate that this "eshaan" could have been made with many different ways but Dixit family captured the first way that came to them - Vicky's job !
Dev is very much shocked to hear his Mom's accusation to register GKB's taunt and take Sona's side. Dev is showing very gradual growth as a husband and we are being unreasonable expecting a rapid change in him fighting back to his elder family member when he had clearly told Sona even before marriage why he maintains his silence for their taunts ! But am sure that day is not far when he stands up for his wife !!
His calm face after the job announcement and his dialog " This is not about you" to Sona tells me there is something more than what we saw in the episode !
We cannot just look at the superficial shouting and yelling of Dev at Sona. He said very clearly its not about her. She doesn't know about his past. He took a decision with his wife. But mother brought him down memory lane reminded him of their past. They wouldnt be here today if not for her brother's help at that time and also those sacrifices she made in preference to her daughters for him.At that time, that help was so precious that cannot forgetten easily but remember it for lifetime no matter how successful you are today.! Do them a favour by giving Vicky the job. Its not even if he was capable or not.That's not the point. They owed their success today to that family too and in way, Ish want Dev to do the favours to them by giving Vicky a managerial position. That's all. So by Dev giving that job, is not a mama's boy, spineless...well you know he has so many names given by people I have lost count.😆
You know when Dev said...sona you dont know about my past..."Do you know what it feels like when you sister stares at you as if you have snatched her food away?" I was really moved by this and shocked. He had a tough time... The hardships he went through. What his mother did for him by being a maid , so that he could get the best in everything and Ish reminded how dared he forgot that!
He was angry not at Sona, but at himself, at his past...and Sona comforting him wasnt not the right time. Not saying that his shouting was right. He wasnt in the right frame of mind..and when he came to his room, Sona talking about it , didnt help and he just lashed out at her...very true what he said...he didnt have a normal childhood like she did...But doing that , in no way, said that he dis respected her. He just wanted to be alone with his thoughts and think through what needs to be done for the next step. Redeem himself. To fulfill the gratitude and obligation that he owed this family!
So he went off and came back so calmly with a decision already made that would make the others happy. And he knew what Vicky is capable of . That's why he told Mamaji, not to worry, he will handle it.
I was angry too, but after thinking through...it made sense to me too.
Sona:
Like most of the newly weds, Sona is trying to mingle to an impossible family. Can we blame her? Its just her 4th day of married life and she genuinely wants to please her MIL who is the most important person of her husband's life. Sona very well know Dev came back to her only after his Mom's approval and she still hold on to that insecure feeling of breaking up again. Poor girl is still in the delusion of her happenings and her only support right now is her husband ! She still gives back to GKB and Vicky when needed but mostly avoids because she knows with gutters she is bound to get dirty and not them !I So she is not spineless but for now being quiet to the situations gauging it !!
So is she wrong when she went to Dev to console and voice her support that he was indeed right in his decision? - NO... But is the timing wrong? - YES !!
Remember the scene of Neha's Vidaai and Dev's breakdown. Sona went to console him but tries to leave when he didn't acknowledge only to be stopped by Dev. Then he shared his pain and she consoled. Thats the Sona Dev needed today but instead we saw a desperate Sona trying to force her support when Dev clearly needed space. Sometimes its better to give these guys what they want because trust me they will come back !! But with the amount of pressure she is handling in this mad house, I can totally understand her frustration and fear.
Sona's reaction after Dev's announcement and Precap is the result of that mounting fear of her place in his life and those painful past of heartbreak!!
I am really amazed at how quickly people tag them with such names over an act...this shows how they think and would react to such situations.
Sona is not wrong to support her husband. Just that the timing was not right in this occassion. His mind is elsewhere and the last thing he needs to hear from his wife, is he took the right decision for which he was berated by his mom for forgetting his past. The past that made the present of who he is today. And that's why he wanted her to be quiet but she keep going at him , just blew the matter up and he walked off.
Both Dev and Sona are imperfect and are reason for their own miseries. Both needs to grow for this relationship and it will be achieved with time !! Lets give them that..
There is not such thing as a perfect marriage, perfect husband and wife...there are no guarantee in life...you just go with the flow...it how you to live and choose your happiness that matters! Issues will always be there. Its how you manage, control and handle it . Does not make one weak...but stronger everyday!
Deepsel...beautiful post...
Frankly speaking I am sick of reading posts of name callings of Dev and Sona for any acts they do which does not go well. So quick and hasty to jump to conclusions. Too judgemental!
In reality...I wonder if they dare to do such things.? I think some people are trapped in their lives and they want to take it out on Dev ( mostly ) for the miseries they themselves experience and.this is their way to find some kind of avenge , satisfaction...of what they cant change in their lives. While the others are so modern in thinking they have a ready made solutions! While there are some genuinely appreciating this track and saying that its very true...now these posts interests me.
I also realize that people like to complain a lot ...but when it comes to compliment ...all is quiet except a few...
Strange huh...but sad...so that's why I choose posts like yours to read coz there is maturity,positivity and reality and the best part there's a light at the end of the tunnel
Thank you my dear friend for such a wonderful post. I almost missed it but a little monkey who came to stat at my place (my niece) has been using my lappy late night.
Have a great week end !
