Posted:
Hi Everyone, it's the first time I have written a piece on Dev and Sonakshi's love story i do write fan fiction but not related to the show so i thought to give this a try and hope you would give me a few minutes of your time to read through the first part . If you interested I will follow through with the next part. So the more likes and replies would definitely encourage me to continue, you can let me know if it's worth the read or not, please excuse any writing errors if you can.😊
Happy Sunday!
Regards
T
T
A Possessive Love!
From a day of Dr Sonakshi Bose,
A gust of wind blew in through the open window rustling important papers on my desk, not for one moment do I have the need to save the printed sheets of paper from being scattered on my plush office carpet. I sit here uncaring that my attempt to proof read a medical report was once again wasted by my need to freeze my mind so that thinking was no longer an avenue for me to dwell on. It was exactly six weeks to that dreadful day when my dreams shattered before me into a million pieces. The splintering shards of it continue to haunt my days and nights plaguing my thoughts with a dull nagging ache and engulfing every part of my brain, while my heart continues to be ripped apart by silence... and more silence. Who would have thought silence has an edge, with its razor blade sharpness it pierces through me everytime I want to think or feel, and the tears oh the tears like floodgates they keel me over drowning my soul so that I don't want to exist because the thought of existing without you Dev, kills me inside.
Why Dev?
Why did you do this to us?
My gullible self continues asking these question's hoping the answers will be different again. Must I ponder upon them harder enough or should I let go... because Dev, I know you don't want to answer me and even more depressing, by your silence I do know the brazen truth ... a truth that I could never deny no matter how hard I try too... I will never be your mother's choice because you loved me without her approval and neither will she forgive me for falling in love with her most precious one, You Dev!
How I wish I hadn't fallen in love with you... how I wish that your dashingly handsome face didn't beseech my mind and swamp my heart with your sinfully gorgeous eyes and charming smile like it does every single waking moment of my day... how I wish Dev that I could forget every little touch of yours, the way your hands would grip me so tight enclosing me in your warmth, it was always the hardest letting go of each other because you would not let go and neither did I ever want to leave the secured comfort you brought to my life. I remember like I live to breathe, your lips upon me gliding over my skin whispering sweet words of adoring love or your delicious mouth ravaging against mine while our tongues locked on their own accord into earth shattering kisses so passionately deep. It was always impossible to breathe around you Dev just that one look of yours and I was so lost in you, when I think of our bodies entwined together so that we could become in complete oneness with each other, it is then, I feel so alone and empty ... how I wish Dev, how I wish our dream of being together could have lasted for that eternity you promised me, that the man I loved, loved me enough to fight for our love to speak out in my favour but sadly, I am faced by my bitter reality that in this world there is no right for a common middle class Bengali girl like me to fall in love with Mr Dev Dixit a worldly man like you, who was I fooling, if not but my stupid silly self.
I wish you had never stormed into my life claiming my heart the way you did and that every word of our love spoken was never spoken. You hurt me Dev, you hurt me ripping into every part of my being by your silence... it kills me every single day that another day has dawned and passed by with no word from you, not a single word since that moment I saw you midway on the staircase watching your mami hurl nasty accusations at me, she called me a calculated gold digger clawing my greedy hands into your life and bank balance and you said nothing and did nothing... your mother whom I love and care for like my own could not even bear to look at me or hear me out while I tried desperately to apologize to her for us hiding our relationship from her. I can never forget her words of hate or her warning that I must stay away from you... the harshness when she said, Nutrition I want you to stay away from my son, that harsh warning rings in my ear like a shrilling piece of violin cord, how I wish I was deaf Dev so I could not hear every heart breaking word.
What you fail to realize It was not just me alone Dev, it was the both of us together in this relationship and you left me to face their wrath and didn't for one moment help to defend us. You broke me Dev by your phlegmatic way you stood there and let everything that I dreamt off fall apart in a single moment. I want to curl up and hide into the darkest pit, the blacker it is the better it would be so that not a single ray of light can penetrate into the blackness I want to feel shroud me to forget you...to forget the four most beautiful months of my life spent loving you and being loved by you. It meant the world to me, you made me feel like a princess, your princess.
When you declared your love to me I felt such an euphoric force of love that not even in my wildest dreams could I ever match up to how we loved each other in real. I was floating Dev floating like magic because you made me feel like I was the only one in this world made for loving you... how wrong could I have been to have allowed you such liberties over me. No matter how hard I try I can never forget, I can never forget this feeling of betrayal from you, the man that I loved more than life itself. I can never forgive myself that I allowed you such control over me my mind, body and soul.
I know we are over I know this with all of my being but I still want to hear it from you... why punish myself even more I ask? maybe I do deserve it... I deserve every bit of this pain that I feel but will goodbye really be enough to forget our love? I continue to curse my wayward thoughts, stop it Sonakshi, I squeeze my eyes shut shaking my head vigorously to that stubborn part of brain, stop being a fool Dr Sonakshi Bose its over between you and Dev Dixit, move on girl. My mind echoes to my heart...but my heart... oh my heart cries out for your betraying heart.
The slightly ticklish sensation of the paper edge lightly brushing against my skin brings me into focus and I am jolted into an autopilot mode as I allow myself to get up from the comfort of my leather chair and in a daze I bend to pick up the papers on floor so that I can put them into some sort of order and I fail miserably in such a simple task, damn it, damn again I scolded myself for allowing my thoughts to intrude into my work space. For the past month I have been working at my new job heading the wellness centre of an elite private hospital. I was lucky enough this position had not been filled when I applied. I was immediately called in for the interview and was given the job on the turn. My mind could not help wander back to my previous job of being a private nutrionist to Mrs Ishwari Dixit, Dev's mother. I loved my job at the Dixit home I loved Auntyji I loved Dev's sister's and I loved Dev even more... suddenly I feel that choking ache well up against my throat.
Knock, Knock can I come in?
I look up to find Dr Yash Arneja looking down at me, he teases me for my predicament on the floor, I think you need some help there Sonakshi? what, i said, Yash pointed at the papers lying on the floor and he immediately bent down to assist without me saying so.
I was not really concentrating when he said, there that's the last one, erhhh I said stupidly , the papers he said we got them all and then I realized he was actually helping me collect all the sheets of paper lying on the floor, thanks I clumsily said. Thanks not needed Sonakshi, I seemed on edge and went to stand behind my desk while Yash sat on the visitors chair and crossed his legs his glistening shoe pointing towards me, I looked at the quality of the sole and knew they are the expensive kind, my eyes could not bring myself to look at him. He was a handsome man I knew all the ladies around could not stop admiring him I never really noticed since I've always been so preoccupied but suddenly I realize they are right, well he is kind of handsome not that it mattered to me.
I cleared my throat and asked, what brings you by Dr Arneja, Yash he said, sorry I mumbled stupidly, you can call me Yash and he smiled. Yash I repeated his name hesitantly, what can I do to help you I utter nervously?
Actually Sonakshi I was wondering if you are available to have dinner with me tonight? What I said, shocked that he asked me to dinner. Yash continued to speak I am leaving the country tomorrow and will be away for the next 3 weeks I need to discuss with you a project I am funding and I need your help, I am sorry to put you on the spot like this, it's just that I need to get things set up kind of immediately and that's why I'm here asking you to a meeting over dinner. He seemed very sincere with his request and I was confused with my role in this but could not refuse, so I agreed to meet with him. Great, Yash said, so if you give me your home address I can pick you up around 8PM.
I hesitated actually no that's not necessary I will meet you there, ok fine by me we can meet at 8.30PM at the Hyatt Regency I will have a table reserved under my name. Yash got up to leave turning back he said, thanks Sonakshi for agreeing to this meeting I really do need your help he couldn't help saying again, we both smiled and he left my office while I went about completeing my tasks for the rest of the afternoon.
Looking forward to hearing from you😊
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