FF-(PH)-Dil par likdo Mera naam/NOTE pg33(JUNE6th) - Page 7

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atop thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#61
wow nikita bery interseting ff..
beautifully scripted and made..
the scenes are just fab and the entire narration is just too awesome.. 👏


great goin gurl..keep up the good work..
and yup update soon..

luv atop
nandini27 thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#62
"heer ke mouth se..."..🤣..seriously tht was really funny...i really cracked....gosh....kya story hai yaaar...man...its soo different....and i love premeer in this....haha...they r just tooo cute...i loved how prem held her hand just to tell their names....loved tht part the best....gosh....man.....i am loving this ff a lot and just a lot...cont asap.....hmm..rem its 27th 2day....hehe...

luv nans
salma_786786 thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#63
wooow i felt like i was watching a classic movie.... girl irritated by boy and boy bugging girl.... this was really good Nikz...i lubbbb that Prem cant speak hindi properly, makes him all the more irresistible.....
with a bit a romance here and there, it was funny yaar....the sunoo sunaeye part killed it 🤣 🤣 i loved that part... this FF is headed in a good direction...
eagerly waiting for next update
nikitaic thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#64

Originally posted by: princess_rulz

[quote]Ticket checker-Excuse me…Appka ticket…

Prem looked at Heer…whose head was against the window…She was sleeping…

Prem-Haan..This is my ticket…

Ticket Checker-Okay…Aur inka?

Prem-Actually she's sleeping…um…Let me check her bag…

Prem looked in her purse and found her ticket…

He handed it over to the ticket checker…

TC-Okay…

Prem looked at the ticket…

Prem-(out loud)-Heer…Kya naam hai…

Heer-(hearing her name woke up)-Tum!!Tumhare pass mere ticket??

Prem-VOh actually Heer, TC ayya tha…tho use ticket dikhana tha…

Heer-(snatched the ticket from him)-

Prem-Wasse, Heer…

Heer-(rolling her eyes)-Please…Mujhe akela choor do…Aur mera naam maath loo!!

Prem-Nahi…Really…Maine tumhara naam kahin sunahua hai…But I cant remember where…Kisi paper par dehka tha…

Heer-Please don't stress your brain…

--

Time passed by…Prem played games on his cellphone…While Heer dozed off….She feel asleep on Prem's shoulder…

[/quote]

Now my question is if Heer was leaning aginst the window then how come in the next scene her head came on Prem's shoulder???

And if am not wrong, we were made to think that they were sitting opposite each other and not together !
Toh phir usska sar isske shoulder par kaise aagaya???

Mind explaning???

PM me when you update it

hey...glad to see that someone is paying attention..but in the last part..I wrote they were siiting together..

anyways...the head on his shoulder part..was I guess not explained..sorry...but basically the movement of the train caussed that Promise..will fix that in the last part...sorry it that made you find the story un imaginable...but I did mention the sitting next to each other part...

The train began to move faster, and the guy sitting next to Heer was just looking at her and began to laugh…

.

aishu_fan thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#65
o wow!!dude!!i just read all of it!!it was so marvelous!!beyond words!!
-Faith- thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#66
WowI just read the last two parts..
Very nicely written! Cute... esp Prem ki tooti phooti hindi..
Loved how created the whole situation..
I kinda like how ur characters are SO totally different from the show.. Makes it all the more interesting..
Keep it up..
Looking forward to the next part
😳
nikitaic thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#67

Sorry that the part is short...Really was just trying to get an update...Promise the next one will be longer...

Happy 4th of July...TO all Americans...

Please enjoy..

I love all your comments...Princess_rulz...I replied to ur question on pg 9...

Sorry time constrictions..dont allow me to reply to comments...Bbut I read them all...

TO BALPREET-(my inspiration)..How are the Mauja hi mauja steps coming??😆

HAPPY READING>>

Heer-Hum kahan jarahein hai??

Prem-Uh…I saw a house…jab hum truck main the…Just looking for that…

Heer-Liken voh toh uss taraf tha…(pointing in opposite direction)

Prem-uh…no..its this way..

Heer-Nahi Mujhe patha hai…ki uss taraf tha…

Prem-Listen to me Heer…Its this way…

Heer-(to tired to care)-Teek hai…

They walked for a long time…until they saw a small house…

Heer-Voh dehko…Ghar…

Prem-Told u!

Heer-ab chaloo…

They walked up to the house it looked creepy…well then again everything looks creepy in the night…

Heer-Mujhe nahi lagtha yahan koi rehtha hai…

Prem-(walking a head of her)-Nahi…rehtha hai…look that light…

Prem walked closer to the gate…and banging it…He banged the gate for a while, Prem and Heer had both given up and were about to turn around when…

A women came out…holding a lantern…

Women-(in a cranky voice)-kyon hai?

Heer-Ji…voh…kya hum ek raat appke ghar rehsak the hain??

Women-Kya??Nahi nahi…main asse hi kisi ko bhi…appne ghar…

Prem-(whispers to Heer)-Are you Pagal?Let me handle this…

Prem-(to women)-Listen…Maam…

Women-Yes…

Prem-I'm sorry that we are bothering you…But…my…Wife…

Heers eyes widened

Prem-My wife..is very sick…Can we please spend the night at your place…

Prem pocked heer…

Heer-Haan…Main bouth bimar hoon…

Prem-yeah…Maybe even dying?

Women-(feeling bad)-Oh..no..Not dying…Come in..

The women opened the gate…

Women-Come in…Main Gurmeet hoon…

The women was old and and walked using a cane…Heer assumed she was in her 60's…But she seemed nice…even hadPrem Heer and Gurmeet walked into the house…Gurmeet turned on the lights…Revealing a small living room…and two opposite halls…One lead to the bathroom…and the other led to led to two bedrooms…

Gurmeet-Tum dono iss kamre main ruk sak the ho…

Gurmeet pointed to one of the rooms…

Prem-JI thank you…

Heer-Namaste…

They watched the women go into her room….

Heer-Prem!!!

Prem-(covered her mouth)-shh…

He pulled her into the bedroom…

Prem-Shh…Your crazy…

Heer-Hum…iss kamre main??

Prem-Chill…I'll stay in the living room…

Heer-Oh…

Prem-gosh you Indian girls…

Heer-Tum videshi men!! Disgusting…

Prem-Relax…Main bahar jaraha hoon…

Prem was about to leave…when he saw Gurmeet standing out side his room…

Gurmeet-Arre beta kuch chahiyeh?

Prem-Voh…Heer ko pani..

Gurmeet-Acha teri biwi ka naam Heer hai?

Prem-Ji..

Gurmeet-(going toward the living room, Prem followed)-Wase tu hai bada sona munda…

Prem-Thank you…

Gurmeet-Tera naam?

Prem-Prem, Prem Juneja…

Gurmeet-(handing him the glass of water)-Yeh le…Main ab ghar par tala lagarahi hoon…Kal subhe milenge…Teek hai…

Prem-App yahan? Living room main?

Gurmeet-Haan…mujhe sofe par hi achi neend athi hai…

Prem-Kya iss ghar main sirf app hain?

Gurmeet-Haan…Main aur mera tommy…(dog)…Voh mere kamre main sotha hai…Yeh kuch kapre hain…Tumhare aur Heer ke liye…

Prem-(smiled)-JI…Good night…

Prem walked back into the room…making sure he knocked 1st

Heer-(looked up, since she was already in bed)-Tum!!

Prem-Shh…There's a problem…

Heer-(pulling the blanket up, towards her)-Kya?

Prem-Bhar voh Gurmeet, she sleeps there…

Heer-kya!Dehko tumne hi yeh sab natak kiya tha…Mere pathni Ab tum hi kuch karo…Tum iss room main nahi rehsak the…

Prem-Look…Chill…tum sleep karo…And I'm here on the floor…

Heer-Nahi!!

Prem-Come on Heer try to understand…

Heer-Nope!!

Prem-Look we cant leave…She's locked the house…plus the city is in no state that we can roam about freely…

Heer-Main yahan nahi ruk sak thi…!!

Prem-Oh god…Fine…Agar we both don't sleep!! Then??

Heer-urr…Teek hai…

Prem-chalo baath karthe hain…

Heer-Hey bagwan…baath voh bhi tumse…chaloo tum start karo…

Prem-Kuch poochhoo..

Heer-Asa lagtha tho nahi hai ki tum India main peda hue ho…Toh kahan se aye ho…

Prem-Haan..well I grew up in Canada….but yes I was born in India…

Heer-How sad…kasie namune peda hothe hain…India main…

Prem-And so I was saying…Main Canada mein grew up…and now my dad wants me to embrace my Indian culture…What about u?

Heer-What about me what??

Prem-I mean tum appne lover se milne ke liye train main sitting right??

Heer-Please…mere peecha choro…

Prem-oh come on Heer…Just tell me why you were on the Train?

Normally Heer would have just ignored him…but something made Heer tell…

Heer-Main…Mere shaddi hone wali thi…Aur phir….

Heer told Prem everything…in deatail…Making the remaining of the night pass…When Heer was done it was 530am…

Prem-Wow…I'm so sorry…You know you should be proud…That you are so well educated I'm sure you can find a job anywhere in Mumbai…Don't worry…

Heer had begun to cry…and Prem came over to her bedside…and patted her back…They had a moment of pure eyelocking...

Asi chale jab hawa ishq hua hi hua.....

Heer moved Prem away...

Prem-uh…Let me go check flight timings…for Mumbai…

Prem went in the living room, and called the airlines…

Prem-Hello…I need 2 tickets to Mumbai….from Ahmadabad, to Mumabi please…

Jet Airways-Okay sir…the total is 7111 rupees…

Prem-(gave his credit card number)-Okay…and can I get a car service from a certain address to the airport…

Jet Airways-Yes sir, I can get it arranged for you, May I have the address please?

Prem-(covers the phone)-gurmeet aunty, appka address kya hai?

Gurmeet-41 57 Navrangpura, RC.Road….

Prem-(uncovering phone)-41 57 RC Road, Navrangpura…

--

A few hours later a car came and got Heer and Prem…

Heer-Thanks Gurmeet Aunty…

Gurmeet-Ab tum Ahmadabad zaroor anna…Tumhari Gurmeet aunty hai…

Heer and Prem hugged Gurmeet, and then loaded there stuff into the car…Which took them to the airport…

Heer-Prem…kithne pasie hue??

Prem-Oh come on Heer…Take it as a sorry for pareshan karne ka gift…

They checked in there luggage and then headed into the flight…

Flight 287 is ready to take off

Heer-Babbaji raksha karna…

Prem watched Heer pray..and as the flight began to move…Heer clutched Prem's hand…As Prem watched her dreamily….When they were finally stable in air…Heer let go…releasing she had been holding on…She said Sorry

--

The journey was quiet…Prem slept…but Heer couldn't afford to…She was too worried about finding Lalit Juneja…

-

Precap-

Heer-Voh pana…Diary main hi tha…Ab kahan hai??

Edited by nikitaic - 17 years ago
tanyaaaa26 thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#68
👏 very nice very nice dear do continue it soon
i will be waiting 👏
nygirlpreet thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#69

Hey it was a short update. Anywayz, it was a nice. Loved the part when Prem and Heer had a moment and the song starts to play. That was romantic. Continue soon!!!11 Hope Heer finally meets Lalit and finds out that Prem is his son. (didn't know they provide car service in the middle of a jungle)

Edited by nygirlbal - 17 years ago
Sadia87 thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#70
yesss you updated!
😊 plz continue! I luv how you protray prem and heer! 😆
great ff!

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