My 1st FF : The Promise of Our Love -Ch 17:Pg 43 - Page 2

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curledup thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#11
Loved every minute of reading it
seriously
the kavita was awsome

~aashifa~
dreamysouls thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#12
Sorry everyone. I know i'm very late in posting the second chapter. But i was busy in moving, setting up my place. But i hope that from now on i wont take more time in updating. So i have written the next chapter and divided it in 2 parts.
Chapter 2
Part 1
At the juneja house, everyone is sitting and having dinner. Just then a scream is heard "Prem……" Everyone run in the direction of the scream. The scene in front of shocks everyone. Lalit juneja is sprawled on the ground and gayatri is crying. Prem immediately calls the doctor. When the doctor arrives he checks Lalit and informs everyone that "Mr. Lalit juneja has suffered a mild stroke. He should be fine in a couple of days. But he should take care of his health. Do let me know if you find anything wrong". Gayatri tells everyone to go to their rooms and let their bauji rest. The next day morning, every one has gathered in bauji's room and bauji addresses everyone " Arey main theek hoon. Lekin maine ek faisla liya hain aur uske liye sabki manjoori chahiye. Maine yeh faisla liya hain ki hum sab India vapas chal rahe hain. Bas ho gaya ab yeh parayon ke saath uthna baithna. Main apne vatan vapas jaana chahta hoon. Mere jitne bhi saal bacche hain main who apne desh main haste hue , apno ke saath bitana chahta hoon. Aap thodi der soch lo aur aapka faisla mujhe aakar batana" Everyone is shocked with this decision. Everyone goes out of the room. Preet says "OMG, India jakar rehna, how is it possible. Main nahi reh paunga waha" A hand rests at his shoulders. Its prem, he says" Cmon Preet, bauji ke liye to humne yeh karna hi hoga. I know shuru shuru main thodi taklif hogi humne waha pe adjust hone ki par thode dino main hum shayad waha ke hi hoke rahenge. Kya pata tumhe India main rehna pasand aa jaye." " Oh cmon PB, aap kehte hain to main try karunga lekin agar mujhe nahi jama to main yaha vapas aa jaunga. Isi condition pe main aane ko taayaar hoon." Prem turns to Kulraj di, she is the elder sister of Prem and Preet." Didi aapne aur jijane kya socha hain" kulraj replies "Prem agar hamari family hi yaha nahi hain to yaha rehkar kya karna hain. Hum bhi challenge India."

Part 2
In a couple of days, when lalit juneja is fit to travel, the juneja family is on their way to India. Its night time when they arrive at their bungalow. Its in the outskirts of the city. Everyone is tired. They all settle down in their rooms. Prem enters his room and goes to the window. From the window he can see the large expanse of the sea and already falls in love with the place. He thinks of taking a walk. Prem inhales the fresh scent of the sea and is lost in his thoughts, when it starts raining. He sees a really old temple and decides to take shelter. He is just shedding water of his hair, when he hears the voice of someone's payals. And then he hears the most melodious voice he has ever heard in his life. He feels like the voice is calling him towards it. And then he sees a girl just at the entrance of the temple, oblivious of the surroundings dancing and humming. Prem is enthralled by what he is just watching. The heavenly scents of the flowers in the garden at night have blended into a soft and sensual feeling. The sky is painted with illuminating stars. It was as if the dance was giving a magical feeling to the night. He tries hard but is not able to have a look at the girls face as she has covered it with her dupatta. And suddenly as she had started dancing, the girl stops as if she has sensed someone and hastily enters the temple. Prem hides himself.
"Oh ho aaj to maa ki daaat khani padegi jab woh dekhengi ki main puri bheeg gayi hoon. Lekin is pehli barsaat main naachne ka maja kuch aur hi hain. Oh iske pehle ki koi mujhe dundhte hue aaye main apna kaam kar leti hoon. Yeh light ka bulb to kal hi kharab ho gaya tha aur main ise change karna bhi bhul gayi. Abhi main bhagwan ke saamne diya kaise lagungi" She tries to look for the matchstick and finds one. "She lights the matchstick and at that instance the wind starts blowing strongly and her dupatta falls off from her head and u can see that the girl is no one other than Heer. The matchstick blows off and heer lights another matchstick and is able to light the diya but due to the strong winds the flame is on the verge of blowing so Heer tries to save it from the wind and at that instance another pair of hands cover the flame. At that instance, in the light of the diya, Prem finally sees the face behind the lovely voice. Their eyes lock and there is an unspoken language being said by their eyes. Everything is suddenly quite, the wind has stopped and all u can hear is the heartbeats of Prem and Heer. Aisa lag raha tha ki waqt thumb gaya tha. Yeh kudrat bhi un do dilon ki pehli bhet karna chahti thi. Dono aise khoye the ek doosre ki aankhon main ki duniya ka hosh hi nahi tha. Prem feels like he has finally met the one he was searching for. The says to himself
" yeh chehra dekhke aisa lagta hain jasie maine ise kahi dekha hain.
tum hi to meri kavita main ho, shabdoon ke ehsaas ki tarah.
tum hi to meri aankhon main ho meri khwabon ki tarah.
tum hi to meri hooton pe ho meri muskurahat ki tarah.
tum hi to mere dil main ho meri dhadkan ki tarah
tum wahi to ho jise main aaj tak dhund raha tha. "


I hope you guys enjoy the chapter. Any suggestions r most welcome.
curledup thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#13
me me me

~*edit*~

first of all your poems are always great!!! 😃
are you secretly a poet or anything?!! 😆 😆
and yes thanks to Lalit bauji they met and she was dancing in the rain oh how I wish I done that today!!! *sighs* fantastic update, the description was intense and great!!!!! 👍🏼
I simply cannot wait for more
please don't take too long this time
and please pm me
thank you

~aashifa~
Edited by curledup - 16 years ago
dreamysouls thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#14

Originally posted by: curledup

me me me

~*edit*~

first of all your poems are always great!!! 😃
are you secretly a poet or anything?!! 😆 😆
and yes thanks to Lalit bauji they met and she was dancing in the rain oh how I wish I done that today!!! *sighs* fantastic update, the description was intense and great!!!!! 👍🏼
I simply cannot wait for more
please don't take too long this time
and please pm me
thank you

~aashifa~



Hi aashifa,
Thanks a lot for your comments. I'm not a poet at all.These poems just came with the flow of writing this FF, thought that i could express it more thru the kavita. I guess Premeer are inspiring me 😉 😉
The poem in ch 2 was inspired from a movie dialogue but yeah the words are mine. I'm glad you liked it.
I was thinking hard how to write @ Prem Heer first meeting and i thought a rain sequence will be perfect. And yeah this time i will not take too long in updating. so till then enjoy!!


Thanks everyone for liking the update. Will write another update soon. Till then enjoy the weekend and wait for Prem and Heer to unite soon
PrincessPatel77 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#15
awesome update
prem and Heer met!!!!!!
continue asap
thanks for the pm
pm me
LegolasGondolin thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#16
mindblowing yaar!!👍🏼
well there is a poet inherent in u!!
nice poems.
" yeh chehra dekhke aisa lagta hain jasie maine ise kahi dekha hain.
tum hi to meri kavita main ho, shabdoon ke ehsaas ki tarah.
tum hi to meri aankhon main ho meri khwabon ki tarah.
tum hi to meri hooton pe ho meri muskurahat ki tarah.
tum hi to mere dil main ho meri dhadkan ki tarah
tum wahi to ho jise main aaj tak dhund raha tha. "

well done mate!!
topsyturvy23 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#17
hey freally nice ff plz do continue soon n plz add me to ur pm list if u have one
curledup thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#18

Originally posted by: dreamysouls



Hi aashifa,
Thanks a lot for your comments. I'm not a poet at all.These poems just came with the flow of writing this FF, thought that i could express it more thru the kavita. I guess Premeer are inspiring me 😉 😉
The poem in ch 2 was inspired from a movie dialogue but yeah the words are mine. I'm glad you liked it.
I was thinking hard how to write @ Prem Heer first meeting and i thought a rain sequence will be perfect. And yeah this time i will not take too long in updating. so till then enjoy!!


Thanks everyone for liking the update. Will write another update soon. Till then enjoy the weekend and wait for Prem and Heer to unite soon





Hi dreamysouls (sorry I do not know your name)

and no problem for the comment and your not a poet 😲 😲 😲 seriosuly with all that I thought you were!! but your poems are great ok
yay premeer are inspiring all right soo happy she is fiinally been able to forgive him
yes yes yes don't take tooo long ok? 😳 !

you 2!!

~aashifa~
P.Kamaljit.Sean thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#19
hey very nice update
do cont soon
cuteangelgirl95 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#20
jst lov it awesome part continue soon thanks for the pm me

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