1sT CONTEST:JAI-BANI MADE FOR EACH OTHER- - Page 7

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Iriss thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#61

wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww 👏

awesome fic MT,i told u that it will be gr8,i loved the whole story n the continuity,the dialogues,the emotions everything perfect 👏 👏 👏

i think u should become the wri/dir for KS 😉

hayeeeeeeeeeee agar aisa birthday hoga toh mein chahoongii kii bani ka birthday rozzz manana chahiye 😆 😆

once i started i could'nt stop laughing all the jai n bani dialogues r excellent 😛 😉 😃

gr8 job yaar,i would be really thankful to u if u continue the fic,really want to know wht happens at the beach 😳 😉 😆

plz MT continue the fic,waiting anxiously to read it 😉

oopsss sorry for double posting😭

Edited by bellle4u - 19 years ago
xsimzxchickx thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#62
MT-----------OMG MAN THAT IS AWESOME NO DOUBT.... U KEPT THE STORY GOING....

Excellent combinations of dialogues …. Everything was clear…. Fabulous scene….!! (Honestly I will be over the moon……. the day I see such a scene between me blessed couple 😳 )…
Everything was compact and you kept to the point you added exceptional feelings and emotions through the use of facial expressions, dialogues and gestures… overall the romantic scenes had a great mood and atmosphere… I will surely give it me top 10!!

Sensational Fan-Fic 👏

And yes surely if I had time… I would of written one fan fic as well…but unfortunately I hardly get time out…these days…I have heaps of university work to do!!! 😳



Edited by xsimzxchickx - 19 years ago
zara18 thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#63
that was brillant i loved it great job MT 😊
fatmah5000 thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#64
i wish if i could be a good writer! 😭 😭
bainssangha thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#65
Excellent 👍🏼 Guys,Keep it up.
***ISHA*** thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#66
omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's was awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
mistletoe u really deserve the 1st price!
it's was exellent mind blowing superb great!
👏
Tomiko thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#67
~ Dil Ke Bat ~

Okay guys…this is my poor attempt at being romantic – I'm rubbish with romance!!!

So…my story hits off just before Jai's business delegates leave

Guy: Thank you Mr. Walia for having us here…and thank you to Mrs. Walia for the excellent food!

Bani smiles and looks down…Jai also smiles and gives the delegates one final greeting before they leave…Jai turns around, just as Bani looks up…their eyes lock…space and time seems to come to a stand still as she loses herself in his intense gaze…Jai slowly takes a step forward, causing her heart to beat harder and her breathing to become more shallower…suddenly a far away sound brings them both back to reality, and Bani immediately turns away, muttering something about clearing up. Jai watches her with a small smile on his lips as she walks over to the table and starts picking up the plates…she feels his gaze following her and bites her lips, trying hard to control herself from turning around, as she knows that if she becomes lost in his powerful gaze again, then anything can happen. She closes her eyes and breathes a sigh of relief as she hears his footsteps make their way steadily up to his room

***

Jai is in his room and is pacing backwards and forwards…he closes his eyes and an image of Bani, laughing comes to his mind…Jai opens his eyes quickly and runs his fingers through his hair

Jai: yeh mere saath kya ho raha hai? Joh bhi Pia neh mere saath kia, uskeliye meh Bani se nafrath karna chatha hu…usse barbad karna chatha hu…par jabhi uska chehra mere akho ke samne atha hai, tho patha nahi kyu…uske alawa mujhe kuch nahin dekhaye dehtha…

Tensed Jai starts pacing the room again…he takes a sharp turn and nearly bumps into Bani

Bani: I'm…I'm sorry Mr. Walia

Bani moves to the right and starts walking to the washroom. Suddenly she stops as Jai grabs her hand…Bani closes her eyes and tries to control her breathing…slowly Jai brings Bani backwards by her arm and looks at her innocent face, and notices the slight fear as she keeps her eyes firmly shut…he lifts his hands and brings it closer to her cheek…he yearns to touch her, to hold her, to make her his forever, but forces himself to stop

Jai: Bani…

he whispers softly

Bani: huh?!

Bani quickly opens her eyes and is startled to see how close they are, but her heart refuses to move back

Jai: meh thumhe thanks kehna chatha tha…thumne joh kuch bhi aaj kiya…

Bani: it's ok Mr. Walia… Mr.Walia.

That word had so much respect in it…but made Bani sound miles away, when she was barely a few inches in front of him. Jai looked down

Bani: aapko kuch hor bhi kehna tha, Mr. Walia?

Jai looked up at her and gave a small smile

Jai: nahi…thum jao…thakgaye hogi…

He lets go of her hand and watches as her fingers slowly slide away from his own. Was it grief that he felt? He didn't know. Bani walked past him but stopped after a few steps. She turned round and put her hand up to say something, but stopped. Jai turned to face her Jai: kuch kehna tha Bani? She looked down

Bani: kuch bathe kahi nahi jathi…par samjhi jathi hai

She looked up

Bani: Dil se…

For the second time that day, their gaze met again and their eyes said everything. Bani smiled and turned round finally making her way into the washroom. as Jai watched her… a small smile playing on his lips…

Very long, so sorry if any of you guys found it boring!

~ Nibbles!😛
Chahat17 thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#68
Hey MT...ur fan fic is really amazing...i just hope that KS writers steals ur ideas n put it in the show...oh i just wish this happens...but u know sooner or later i think ur wish might come true...u did a great job...i just hope that balaji fires their current writers and hire u 😉...keep up the excellent work....oh btw i loved the line where u wrote"mera naam jai hai mr. walia nai"...aawww sooo cute........i wish jai says that in reel life too 😆...cheers hun...laters!
suku thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#69
hi nibbles tis is my 100th post dedicated to congratulate u on ur wonderful story. I think it was great!!!!! Looks like a work of a pro. 👏
Edited by suku - 19 years ago
KHJL thumbnail
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Posted: 19 years ago
#70

Originally posted by: xsimzxchickx

MT-----------OMG MAN THAT IS AWESOME NO DOUBT.... U KEPT THE STORY GOING....

Excellent combinations of dialogues …. Everything was clear…. Fabulous scene….!! (Honestly I will be over the moon……. the day I see such a scene between me blessed couple 😳 )…
Everything was compact and you kept to the point you added exceptional feelings and emotions through the use of facial expressions, dialogues and gestures… overall the romantic scenes had a great mood and atmosphere… I will surely give it me top 10!!

Sensational Fan-Fic 👏

And yes surely if I had time… I would of written one fan fic as well…but unfortunately I hardly get time out…these days…I have heaps of university work to do!!! 😳



so tru i agree w/ ya 100%..........itz like u took the words out of mi mind............luved the story.......wowwwwwwwwwwww......oh gosh..............they just have to show this scene...............i m actually dying to c a scene like tht asap................gosh!!!!!!!..........i m so hyped..............MT..............really fabulous job............amazing..........awsome..................n extremely extrodinary................luved it...luved it...luved it...........can't wait to read more............lol...............n soon...............hehe👏

btw.......can u plzzzzzzzz continue the luvly story.............plzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzzz.....................i m dying to read more............😉😳

Edited by KHJL - 19 years ago

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