NOVEL~*Hiding behind a Stranger*~THREAD 43-CHAPTER 48 Upd 1st May

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karkuzhali

@karkuzhali

Inactive

Posted: 7 years ago

#111

Chapter 48.

Haikus..

Chapter forty eight

Brought waterfalls in the eyes

Oh God! Poor Baisas!😭😭

We were relishing

Sweets served by Lashy before

We've bit chilli now..😡

Karkuzhali thinks

To consult astrologer

What'll happen next?😕

Mercury enters Taurus

'Expect the unexpected'

The prediction says!😲

It's Good versus Bad

Is Shehzaade good or bad?

Next chapter will say!😕

KK.

Edited by karkuzhali - 7 years ago

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jiya

@jiya.k

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#112

Originally posted by: Kalgi22

Hi Rupinder... 🤗 A warm welcome to HBAS house... 🤗

HELLO rupinder...

Welcome to this wonderful HBAS family..🤗

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Sabdabhala

@Sabdabhala

Dazzler

Posted: 7 years ago

#113

SO I AM BACK WITH DETAILED COMMENTS, AFTER A COUPLE OF THOROUGH READINGS, AND HERE THEY ARE -

THERE ARE ACTUALLY TWO SETS OF COMMENTS, FIRST ONES ABOUT YOUR WRITING STYLE, AND THE SECOND ONES ABOUT THE STORY, THE PLOT AND THE CHARACTERS

REGARDING THE FORMER, I MUST SAY THAT I AM TOTALLY BLOWN WITH THIS CHAPTER... EACH WORD IS USED PERFECTLY, AND IS SCENE IS EXPLAINED SO VIVIDLY AND BEAUTIFULLY THAT I CAN IMAGINE EACH ONE IN MY MIND CLEARLY - RIGHT FROM THE 'DISTURBED' AAYAT THAT THE SHEHZAADE RECITES TILL HEERA RUNS TO THE WINDOW WITH HER PRAYERS AND WISHES FOR THE SAHIB. 👏

THIS IS AN EMOTIONALLY CHARGED CHAPTER, TO PUT IT MILDLY 😉 BUT THE FINESSE WITH WHICH YOU HAVE HANDLED THE MYRIAD EMOTIONS IS ABSOLUTELY ASTOUNDING 👏 FROM SHEHZAADE'S VEILED AND CONTROLLED ANGER, TO FAROOQ SAHIB'S HIDDEN DECEIT AND TWO FACEDNESS, TO KHALIL'S MANIC EUPHORIA, TO KHAN SAHIB'S OPTIMISM REGARDING THE CANAL, HIS SHOCK AT THE DEATH OF HIS MEN, HIS SILENT LAMENT FOR NOT APPRECIATING THEM ENOUGH WHILE THEY WERE ALIVE, HIS GENTLE HANDLING OF SAYYID, HIS GRATITUDE ON SEEING HIM ALIVE, HIS DEJECTION AT THE NEWS RECEIVED FROM THE SPY, HIS EMBARASSMENT FOR HIS MOMENTARY LOSS OF CONTROL, HIS TENDER TETE A TETE WITH HIS WIFE, HIS VULNERABILITY WHEN HE MAKES HER SEE REALITY, HIS INDECISION REGARDING WHAT TO DIVULGE TO HIS HUZOOR, HIS STEADFASTNESS TOWARDS HIS GOAL, HEERA'S BATTLE WITH HER EMOTIONS, HER RESOLVE TO NOT TEAR UP, HER SENSITIVE UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT THE SAHIB WANTS...EACH AND EVERY EMOTION IS BEAUTIFULLY EXPRESSED...WITH NOT A SINGLE SYLLABLE OUT OF PLACE

ANOTHER SUPERB ASPECT OF YOUR WRITING SKILLS, AND I HAVE MENTIONED THIS POINT SEVERAL TIMES, IS HOW WELL YOUR STORY FLOWS THROUGH THE CHAPTERS...MUCH LIKE THE JOURNEY OF THE CANAL THAT SAHIB IS ENVISAGING...

I LOVE THE WAY YOU HAVE CHARACTERIZED THE NEW MAN, FAROOQ SAHIB - SUPERBLY DETAILING HIS PHYSICAL APPEARANCE, AND JUST A BIT LATER, HIS CHARACTER...👏

NOW TO THE STORY AND CHARACTERS

I THINK THE SHEHZAADE IS RIGHT IN HIS PLACE TO BE SO DISTURBED, TO A LARGE EXTENT. IF SUCH NEWS ABOUT THE PERSON WHOM HE RESPECTS THE MOST REACHES HIM, HE WOULD CERTAINLY BE WISE TO HAVE IT INVESTIGATED. AND THE KIND OF ERA THAT IT WAS, TRUST WAS THE ONE THING THAT WAS DIFFICULT TO FIND...

FAROOQ SAHIB TURNED OUT TO BE QUITE A TWO FACED MONSTER, I MUST SAY. IT WAS A SHOCK FOR ME TO SEE HIM RUSH WITH THE NEWS TO KHALIL, OF ALL PEOPLE. BUT AGAIN WITH BROTHERS KILLING EACH OTHER, THIS WAS OK TO DIGEST, I GUESS...HIS SPIES HAVE CERTAINLY GIVEN HIM ACCURATE INFORMATION. AND HE SERIOUSLY IS QUITE SHARP AND THE SHROUD OF CONFIDENTIALITY IS SERVING HIM WELL...

KHALIL, OF COURSE, IS CONSISTENTLY EVIL...NO CHANGE THERE... AND I AM QUITE HOPEFUL THAT, UNLESS KHALIL HAS AQUIRED SOME EXCEPTIONAL CEREBRAL PROWESS 😆 THAT HE WILL CERTAINLY DIG HIS OWN GRAVE IN THE FRENZY OF BRNGING THE SAHIB DOWN...

THE WHOLE SCENE AT SAYYID'S HOUSE WAS EXTREMELY POIGNANT...SAHIB'S THOUGHTS AND ACTIONS ARE SO SUBTLE, SO SUITABLE...AND JUST PERFECT...

ALL OF SAHIB'S MEN ARE HEROES...AZEEZ, SAYYID...😳 AND THE SNIPPET ABOUT SAYYID'S PAST LIFE IS ENDEARING TO READ...HOW, WITH A LITTLE TENDER NURTURING, A MAN UNDERGOES A SEA CHANGE IN HIS THOUGHTS AND DEEDS...👏 AND IT WAS AWWW MOMENT FOR ME TO SEE HIM FEEL SORRY...WHEN, IN REALITY, ALLOF US AND HIS SAHIB KNOW THAT HE DID THE VERY BEST...SHOWING SO MUCH GRIT AFTER HAVING BEEN SO GRAVELY INJURED...

THE RUSH OF ACTIVITY IN THE HAVELI IS WONDERFULLY DESCRIBED... LIKE ALL SCENES WHIRRRING PAST AND HEERA AT THE CENTRE OF IT ALL, WONDERING WHAT SHE MUST DO... AND THE CRASH OF THE LANTERN...SYMBOLIC AT SO MANY LEVELS...SUPERB!!!

AZEEZ AGAIN 😆 HAVE TO REALLY HAND IT TO THE GUY...THE WAY HE SENDS HEERA INSIDE SPEAKS VOLUMES ABOUT HIS FINE SENSIBILITIES...

AND THE SCENE INSIDE HIS CHAMBER... GOD, I DONT HAVE WORDS TO DESCRIBE IT... BUT THE ONE NOTICEABLE THING FOR ME WAS THAT THE SAHIB TELLS HEERA EVERYTHING POINT BLANK... HIS TRUST IN HER AS HIS COMPANION HAS GROWN MANIFOLD, AND WHY NOT? HEERA TOO IS BECOMING HIS TRUE SAATHI AT BREAKNECK SPEED...SHE DOES NOT SHED EVEN A SINGLE TEAR...AND REMAINS A HUGE SUPPORT TO HIM BY UNDERSTANDING HIM PERFECTLY...AND REMINDS HIM OF HIS PROMISE IN THE MOST SUBTLE WAY...

THE FLASHBACK ABOUT THE MOONLIT NIGHT WAS ETHREAL, LASHY!!!

AND THE FOCUS ON THE TAAVEEZ POUCH WAS...UFFF...THEIR BRIEF TOUCH SEEMED HEAVENLY AND THEIR PARTING...WAS JUST TENDER AND SAD...MOSTLY SAD!!!

THE WHOLE CHAPTER WAS A MASTERPIECE, MY DEAR...BUT FOR ME, THE MASTERSTROKE WAS THE POEM AT THE END...THAT SUITABLY CONVEYED WHAT THE SAHIB MEANT TO HER, AND HER PEOPLE; AND THE DANGERS THAT THEY WERE NOW EXPOSED TO, IN HIS ABSENCE...

AND WHAT DO WE HAVE TO LOOK FORWARD TO... SAHIB'S HOPE...

'THIS COULD BE THE BEGINNING'

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Kuki715

@Kuki715

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#114

Originally posted by: lashy

I was in my car, on the way to the movie when I saw this and sat up! Never expected to see my lively Begum so down.. 🤗 I did expect tomato men and sad faces... but this was another level of heart-tugging! Love you re and don't feel so low... there is bad in this world and there is good too... believe in that!

Oohkay 😃🤗

>>>😭😡 for Khalil

Usko toh 🤢

I can so feel your desperation for AMK, Cookie... a desperation to want to physically go stand there by his side and do what you can to help his cause... don't know if I am making sense😕...

Yes only if Lana di doesn't mind

Dare I say so myself, but, if I have indeed managed to evoke those feelings in you, it restores some faith in me as a writer 🤗thank you for this... these strong reactions on the back of a chapter that I expected was more transitional than anything else... has boosted me up tons... and yes, AMK is a noble soul.. paavam

Restoring faith don't you know what your words do to you...from 😭 to 😃 to to ☺️ to and now back to 😭

Oh my God.. I am so so sorry dear... here's a big hug from me and remember the pie you just baked in TIP! 🤗 You can have Selvi's chocolates too, if that'd make you feel better!

I went out had chaats and panipuri to feel better 😆

Your question about her going with him and a few others questions from others, I'll answer together when I have time later in the noon🤗

Yes didn't think much about Khalil now reading Chellam di and Lana di please tell me he won't go to Parnagarh please...don't want Heera Akbar and us to go through that again 😭

Edited by Kuki715 - 7 years ago

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Kuki715

@Kuki715

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#115

Originally posted by: Kalgi22

Oh no... 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭

God! Stop torturing 😡😭

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Kalgi22

@Kalgi22

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#116

Originally posted by: karkuzhali

Chapter 48.

Haikus..

1.
Chapter forty eight
Brought waterfalls in the eyes
Oh God! Poor Baisas!😭😭

2.
We were relishing
Sweets served by Lashy before
We've bit chilli now..😡

3.
Karkuzhali thinks
To consult astrologer
What'll happen next?😕

4.
Mercury enters Taurus
'Expect the unexpected'
The prediction says!😲

5.
It's Good versus Bad
Is Shehzaade good or bad?
Next chapter will say!😕

KK.

Predictions also not in our favor... 😭 😭 😭 This set of Haikus very well portrayed our emotions, Periamma! 👍🏼 👏

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Kuki715

@Kuki715

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#117

Originally posted by: lashy

Alright... I am so compelled to think that certain parts of the chapter reflect something that's transpired in your past, Cookie... and that it might have brought back the bitterness... I hope you have been able to come out of it positively... we are all here da 🤗

🤗🤗🤗

Ishhh your Sahib was in serious mode today, Dekha? 😉 Must have made you go all warm inside... 😉

Yes he was so sensible and strong and the way he encouraged Heera to meet AMK... 😳 so admirable... Aaj toh socha mummy se milwa hi doon☺️...but... .he went again with Khan sahib 😒

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hazoorkidpan

@hazoorkidpan

Inactive

Posted: 7 years ago

#118

Originally posted by: lashy

Wow...😲 Your first post here...so glad you did...all these days you've been silently liking posts here and I had no idea it was you Rupinder!!!!! OMG!!!!!

Baisas, do meet Rupinder🤗... We've interacted via FB and some of the words, she's sent me via Personal messages are short, sweet and surreal no kidding... ... Lovely writer, she is...

I have always been wanting to share her comments here, but wanted her to give the green signal first...

As for the ending in HBAS, I've said this before... I say it again... I believe in happy endings... In using creativity to escape to a bit of fantasy...there's too much sadness in the real world, Rupinder... I wouldn't be able to justify to myself creating 2 fighters like AMK and Heera, only to have them lose...so, worry not🤗

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Kalgi22

@Kalgi22

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#119

Lavanya superb writing!! 👏 👏 and yes the poem was the masterstroke.. 😭

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Kuki715

@Kuki715

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#120

Originally posted by: Kalgi22

Then what does this means?? " 'Harka Sahiba...' he planted his dry lips on the words of the letter, as if thirsting for a feel of the fair hands of the Lady herself - the hands of Ustaad's Begum" 😭

This line just made me 🤢

But can he attack/go to Parnagarh just like that without taking Shehzade's permission 😲

A very warm welcome to Rupinder in HBAS world 🤗