|Arhi OS|~ Intezaar

Tere pyar mein jal raha hoon
Teri yaad mein ro raha hoon

Finger tips softly caressed over her closed eye lids, urging them open. She refused to open them. The fingertips lingered there moving down her cheekbones, coming to rest at her collarbone. She shivered as tender lips followed the already burning path and adding to her sweet torture. "Khushi," he whispered into her neck. Her hands found his shirt and twisted it into her fingers, for she would never let go.

Lips pressed upon her shut eyelids, urging once again for her to open them. She gave in. She shouldn't have, she knew that, but she did. A single tear fell through both eyes as a painful sigh escaped her lips, lingering in the silence before mingling into the nothingness.

Her empty hands stay clutching the air, her neck burning with the memory of him. She sat on the bed, alone, the moonlight filtering into the room in a sole ray, piercing the darkness. Quivering lips were pressed together as a cry erupted then died in her throat.

"Arnav!" She finally choked, her body succumbing into the pillows, as waves of suppressed pain shook her. Khushi pressed her fisted hands onto her mouth, disallowing anything to escape them. Yet her tears flowed freely, the only memoir to the love she lost.

Teri neend ko sun raha hoon
Tere khwab mein so gaya hoon

Hours later, in the wake of a new day, she gave in to the fatigue that enveloped her, knowing he would be waiting for her there, in that place void of reality.

She found him there, his back to her, the wind playing with the cropped tendrils on his ebony hair, calling her forward. Her feet moved on its own accord, dil over dimaag. He turned then, knowing she would be there. Her lips curled up and basked in the glory of seeing him again, even if the aftermath would be painful.

Bronze sparked against hazel as the met, each burning the other into its memory. Searing it there forever and beyond.

Beyond. Was there a beyond? Was he there? Was she there now with him?

Intezar tha tere pyar ka
Beqarar tha tere pyar ka,
Dil ki lagan kuch yun lagi
Rangeen ye shaam dhalne lagi

Arnav stepped forward, bringing his hand to her lips, slowly earning a kiss from her. She shut her eyes and he enveloped her in his arms. "I love you, Khushi," he whispered into the mass of her hair. She pulled back then, cupping his face in her hands. "Promise?" She whispered, the pain in her hardly masked. "Hamesha," he replied, slowly pulling back from her embrace.

"Don't go," she cried to his retreating back. Her eyes pricked with tears, but she reigned them in.

He turned to face her, still stepping away. "Let me go, Khushi," he said softly, a command masked in a request. He turned again, stepping further into the land of her dreams, leaving her cold and empty. Leaving her lost.

Let me go. His words echoed in the abyss she once called a heart. She had one no more. He had left, taking it with him. Yet his words remained there, warming the bitter frost. She had no choice, did she? She had to let him go.

Of course there was an option. She could clutch onto what lay beyond her control, hoping it would mold to her will. She could remain and continue forever as a prisoner of what was not reality. Or she could listen to him. She could accept his absence and move on, never to anything better, but still something better than void she was trapped in.

Silently she looked on, as he turned for the last time and looked at her, into her. The heart dazzling smile played on his lips one last time, and she closed her eyes, capturing that moment in her heart. She opened her eyes to see him no more.

And like that he disappeared into the violet amber of the sky.

Tere pyar mein jal raha hoon
Teri yaad mein ro raha hoon
Teri neend ko sun raha hoon
Tere khwab mein so gaya hoon

Khushi gasped as she sat up in their bed, the open French doors allowing her to see the monsoon rains flood the pool. Her eyes pooled with tears, resembling the pool as her tears spilled over. The curtains whisked mindlessly in the wind, as the cold air chilled her. Streaks of sunlight fought with the stubborn clouds as they blocked the radiance of the sun.

Khushi pulled her knees to her chest, and wrapped her arms around them in an effort to hold herself together. She rocked back and forth, her breath quickening, her tears falling more rapidly. Emotions she had shut in poured out, threatening to bring to surface everything she held in. She shuddered in the force of her memories.

Meri sanson mein, in nigahon mein, dil ki rahon mein,
Tum hi tum to ho.
Meri khamoshi, meri guftagu, meri rubaru,
Tum hi tum to ho.

A touch here, a kiss there, a hug, a few words, the words unspoken, the eye locks, the tender affection, his perfume, his warmth, his presence, a playful wink, a heart stopping whisper, a random act of kindness, a spontaneous night out, impulse arguments, passionate nights, loving days, and everything she could never have again. They whirled in her mind, until her cries left in small gasps.

"Arnav!" She screamed throwing her head back with the burden of her loss, a shrill and wounded cry, breaking through the serenity of the rain. "Arnav!" She sobbed, her arms frantically attempting to hold her together.

Anjali burst in through her door, taking in the sight of her sister in law as a small lump on the massive bed. The older woman made her way quickly to Khushi, wrapping the frail body in her arms, attempting to soothe the shivers. Anjali breathed roughly through her open mouth trying to keep in check the emotions she herself had.

Khushi head buried into the warmth of Anjali's embrace, her sobs muffling. Her tears soaked through Anjali's sari as more broken cries tore from her soul.

Nani and NK came next, their hearts constricting at the sight before them. The two women before them once meant so much to someone. Someone who was no more. Nani met Anjali's eyes and moved toward Khushi, and she placed a hand on her back.

This was bound to happen one day. Khushi had held everything in for too long. She was fighting to accept fate, and her realization was bound to bring this breakdown. Is that where she was now? Realization?

Judaa kyun hue sochta hoon
Tujhe raahon mein dhoondta hun

Khushi hugged Anjali closer as memories and words echoed in her mind. She shut her eyes, wishing to escape to that realm of illusions she had found.

"Car accident, a hit and run case."

"He lost too much blood combined with the lack of oxygen to the brain'"

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Raizada. We tried our best but'"

"Khushi, they're bringing the' the body' They're bringing Arnav home. One last time."

"Chotte? Open your eyes, please? It's Di, Chotte! Chotte, don't do this! Chotte!"

"Khushi-ji? It's time to say goodbye to Nanav. You have to Khushi-ji. Please'"

Khushi slumped into Anjali's arms as her sobs slowly subsided into silence. The rain still fell, a broken rhythm but still strong, just like her heart. She could do this, it whispered. NK held her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze, bringing her out of her revere.

"He's gone." Khushi whispered to no one in particular. Anjali shut her eyes as tears streamed down in a lone mark across her check.

Khushi slowly rose from the bed, avoiding the eyes that watched her. She moved slowly, but her feet carried her strong and steady this time, knowing her purpose. Moving forward, Khushi stepped over the threshold and into the rain.

Tere pyar mein jal raha hoon
Teri yaad mein ro raha hoon

The cool rain mingled with her skin, soaking through her hair, embracing her in its substance. Her tears mixed and washed away into the rain, leaving nothing but their memory.

Let me go, Khushi. His words repeated once again in her mind. This time she didn't fight them. Khushi closed her eyes, this time not to hold anything back. She lingered on the smile and that smirk. She lingered on his eyes and their spark. She lingered on his embrace and its warmth.

She lingered on him, and everything he was.

Khushi nodded into the rain. She would let him go. She breathed in, shuddering at the lightness that settled in her.

"I love you, Arnav." She whispered. "Goodbye."

***

Listen to this song. I promise you, it's beautiful and worth it. Such an underrated song but lovely.

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vK_DPgoiBPU[/YOUTUBE]

**A/N: Don't hate me for this, but I was in the mood for something heavy. I know my update for AA is overdue, but give me some time, please? Your patience will be rewarded, I promise. -Ann