This Post Is Synopsis of Individual Episode with Analysis -
A Window into the Eyes, Mind, Soul and Heart...of Khushi and Arnav:
If Hindi is not your language, then read it here- translation provided...
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Part 48:
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[Author of This Post Reserves All The Copyright - do not copy /paste or reproduce the materials or ideas, in part or complete, without written permisssion from author]
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Episode: May 17th
Part 49:
Pehla Pehla Pyaar Hai, Pehli Pehli Baar Hai!
(First Love, For The Very First Time!)
Tears of Pearls and Oceans of Tears
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-Jab Yaad Kissiki Aaati Hai -
Arnav and Khushi - Khushi and Arnav -
Just when Khushi thought her mind was occupied with the worry about retrival of papers, being at the temple brought back so many memories of Arnav for her that she did not remain herself...she was only Arnav's Khushi...every breath she took, had Arnav in it...
Today saw Khushi's yearning for her love, that led to a confused state of mind, still longing for Arnav so much that every move she made, every breath she took, every tear she spilled had Arnav written all over it...
Khushi walks heavy hearted towards the steps of the temple, oblivious of Shyam, holding the very papers she needs in his hands. Khushi's mind and eyes occupied with Arnav's memories...temple being a singificant place in those memories...
As Khushi approaches Shyam, Anjali already finds him looking at the papers and finds it disturbing that he did not attend the worship inside.. She inquires about papers, Shyam makes an excuse that those are work related, making Anjali further unhappy that on such a day he is thinking more about his work than to be with her. Shyam quickly folds the papers and places those in his backpocket, just in time of Khushi's arrival. Anjali spots Khushi as she arrives with a somber face, she tells her that she reached at the right time and the main worship is about to begin... She asks Khushi and Shyam both to come inside the temple to join the pooja..worship..Anjali leaves..Shyam asks Khushi cunningly, "What's the matter? Is everything alright?" Khushi gives him a penetrating look and walks away...a sadistic smile appears on Shyam's face...
Inside the temple: as everyone prays to the God, Mahadeva, Khushi starts telling God what her worries are..pleads for help, "O Mahdeva, can you help me? I do not know why but I am very worried about Arnav ji.. I sense that something is not right...I feel that something is wrong... he left without listening to what I had to say... he..just..left! Let us not worry about me, I will manage somehow but, you, please,look after him... keep him safe wherever he is...and yes, please tell him to come back soon..I..I...(miss him)!" Khushi again breaks down in tears..then true to herself she requests God Mahadeva not to tell Devi Maiyya that she shared her worries with him this time! Oh, Khushi! I love you! You are so vulnerable at this moment that if Arnav saw you like this, he will just melt away...
Back at RM: Khushi enters her room with Pooja thal - deep in her thoughts.. her mind gets back again wondering about the papers..."Where have those papers disappeared? Does Shyam ji even have them? or is it possible that he anticipated me seraching for those after he left so he took those out of the briefcase before he left...Or did I just lose them?" Khushi gets extremely restless with this thought..her eyes well up..thinks.."I will never be able to prove truth without those papers.."
In London: The group that was supposed to meet with Arnav wonders why he is late and has not shown up on time for the meeting as usual... they find it unsettling that his phone is unreachable and that he never checked in at the hotel the night before..the night of his expected arrival to London...

Back at RM: Khushi by poolside..in the mystical atmosphere but oblivious to the magic... restless Khushi keeps looking at her phone... looks at the message Arnav sent for the upteenth time..wonders why Arnav did not call Anjali if he did not want to call Khushi..particulary on the birthday of his mother ...Then Khushi goes on a tangent..thinks, "Well, he never cares about anyone! And here I am, continuosly thinking about him, worried about him! How can one expect anything but indifference from Arnav Singh Raizada!" she says with rage..Wrong Khuhsi..You know what Anjali means to Arnav..he would do anything in the world if he thought that she needed to be called...then her thoughts change gear...something dawns upon her..she finally wonders, "Why did he inform ME about his reaching London? By Text message..he never did this before..."Khushi gets more worried.
In the Kitchen:
Khushi makes the batter for Jalebi..her phone by the side on the kitchen counter..she invariably keeps looking at the message from Arnav frequently..then frustrated she says to herself, "he only informed me anyway..he did not talk to me, then why should I be thinking about him non-stop?" She tells herself, "Don't think too much, Khushi!" As her hands mix the batter vigorously, her mind mixes memories of her very first meeting with Arnav..when she fell down from the ramp and was caught by Arnav in his arms, with many cameras clicking pictures...to her final moment with Arnav when they got separated..with her pleading to him to not go and Arnav, leaving without looking back, heavy heartedly...Her thought once agin come back to rest on the moment of Arnav pulling away his hand from her grip with intense pain evident in his eyes...leaving without looking back at her when she kept pleading to him not to leave... All the crowding of thoughts..the memories..the nightmare..the tears..the restlessness that she experinces non-stop..not being able to be at peace...leads Khushi to think, "My nightmare... this repeated resurfacing of our memories together..me thinking non-stop about him...something somewhere is wrong.." her heart believes that but her mind...does not! "Khushi, calm down! Nothing is wrong! Think good, so that everything goes well! This empty mind is devil's den! Stay busy with the Jalebis.."she tells herself!
Khushi brings two big piles of Jalebis to the Dining table.. keeps in front of Naniji...Naniji's eyes go wide with surprise as do everyone's around the table looking at the humongous mountains of jaliebi.. Naniji asks, "So may jalebis? Even if we kept munching whole day, we won't be able to eat them all!' Khushi answers in somber tone, "It's just that my heart desired.." Anjali teasingly interrupts, "Your heart desired..or you did it to keep your mind occupied?" Khushi does not answer, goes around the table serving Jalebi. As Nani tastes the jalebi, she notcies that the taste of Jalebi is slightly different...she asks Khushi why that might be... Khushi answers, "Oh, I am sorry..looks like I messed up! You know that Arnav ji eats Jalebis made with sugar substitute..so I made them all with sugar substitute..." as Khushi says that she realizes, he is not here..everyone around the table feels very sympathetic towards Khushi's current state of mind...except Shyam, it irks him! As Anjali looks at Khushi adoringly, watching her sis-in-law lose it while missing her brother; an irritated Shyam says, "But when Saalesab, bro-in-law, is not here..why did you bother making these Jalebis for him?" Anjali says affectionately, "So what! Even if he is not here, the Jalebis can be made because he is being missed, right, Khushi ji?" Khushi breaks down in tears and runs away to her room. Payal tries to go after her but Nani suggests that Khushi be left alone as that might be the best thing to do when she misses Arnav so desperately!

Most beautiful But Heart Wrenching Moment: As Khushi comes running to the room, she closes the door behind her and breaks down in tears...she remembers the very first time she fed Arnav a Jalebi - Khushi's most favorite dish to her beloved Arnav, who is a diabetic..as fate would have it, his blood sugar dropped trendously making him almost unconscious..and he asked for a sweet himself to Khushi..a moment shared by just the two of them.. My eyes welled up, my heart churned, my tears started trickling down...my heart cried with Khushi..Never experienced such a beautiful yet heartwrenching moment before in my life! Khushi cries her heart out, tries to suppress her sobs..her heart yearning for Arnav so bad that an ocean would be created by her tears...she tries to control her emotions, she wonders, "What's wrong with me? Why did I make Jalebi for Arnav ji? That too in his abscence?"
Joh aakhoan se nikalte hai, ashq kahlate hai
Joh dil se nikalte hai woh jakhm hote hai
Joh jubaan se nikalti hai woh dua hoti hai
Joh aankh se tapke aasoo nahi, chingari hoti hai
What trickle form eyes are named tears
What oozes from heart named bruises, oh dear
what comes from lips is called a blessing
what spills from an eye, is spark of flame,
not to be mistaken for a tear..

First Honest Realization of Her Emotions For Arnav: Khushi tries to keep herself busy with things to do. She picks up her folded clothes, places those in the closet...as she pulls her hand away..a string of pearls knots with her bangles and breaks loose..spilling beautiful pearls all over.. Khushi sees Arnav everywhere... those pearls remind her of her first introduction with Arnav's rage..Her mind puts the pearls of memories - memories not so love filled - memories filled with rage, anger and hatred... blindsighting Khushi from the memories she had yesterday..the ones that showed his love for her through all the rage...this moment..the beautiful pearls become the reason of unpleasant memories..coming into a string..making Khushi sad and tearful...her heart wrenching with intense pain yet yearning for Arnav badly...Next Khushi remembers, Arnav placing money with disgust in her hand after she collided with his car on their first meeting in Delhi...remembers the time when he saved her from getting burried underneath the crumbling building but treating her roughly hurting her physically,,bruising her emotionally...not even aware that he did it...but then saving her from getting hit by the car after making her stand in the rain for hours...everytime he pulled Khushi back to himself, bringing her closer, yet with roughness..as Khushi thinks, "Some relations are just very different .. tied in a diffrent thread...they start with arguments..complaints... get nurtured under the shadow of hatred...they go through the fall and the rise yet sustain... the stronger the hatred gets the stronger the bond becomes...to the extent that one day, even hatred shys away...then the bond just becomes a binding burden..the bond of hatred...as Khushi remembers the hatred in Arnav's eyes when he tied the Mangalsutra - the wedding necklace- around her neck and filled her maang with sindoor...

MOST BEAUTIFUL 'BIRHA' (Separation) SCENE OF THIS DECADE: But then in the clear glass of the poolside door..Khushi can see her own reflection very clearly..and something else comes out clearly to her...just like the shimmer on the waves in the pool reflecting on Khushi's face.."But then..sometimes I feel that there is something hidden underneath all that hatred... sometimes my heart says, I should give myself a chance to experience this unknown..unheard..unfamiliar..feeling..something intense.."as she remembers Arnav's somber face while carrying her in his arms when he found her at the temple after a deperate search...his passionate love reflecting in every action, every touch when they danced together in unison...Then the scary thoughts start creating doubts in Khushi's mind.."But then.. it would be foolish to expect anything from such a realtionship that rests on the foundation of hatred..." she draws the similarity as this fear from the memory of Arnav telling her why he married her...but then...even with the image of Arnav..not so pleasant..full of anger..full of disgust in his eyes for her..does not deter her...she slides down gradually to sit on the floor by the glass door..as her heart sinks with the realization that, "I think..I have already taken the foolish step of expecting..that something else from this realtionship..built on hatred..."..

And Khushi comes back to communicating with her beloved...as memories around their separation become stronger in her mind..."If not so..then why do I miss you so much despite so much hatred? Why do I fight with you so much?..argue with you so much.?.only to wait for you desperately after you are gone.. ! I talk to the breeze about you..." Khushi's precious tear rolls down her face..as she rests her head against the glass door..
Okay, I cried..I rejoiced... I felt the pain..I felt the hurt...I felt the LOVE...Khushi's realization of her falling in love with Arnav could not have been better.. her heart longing for him..he physically miles away form her... she feels him in every breath she takes..she feels him in everything she touches.. she does everything for him... her mind and heart completely taken over by him...the breeze becomes him...oceans are created by tears trickling down Khushi's eyes for Arnav...
(Author's Note: This is the most intense, most beautifully shot and dirceted 'Biraha' scene in this deacde..most beautiful realization of falling in love...real love...Cudos to the team..also best shots: the pearl and Khushi's precious lonely tear..)
[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRCFKA50wV4[/YOUTUBE]
Jab yaad kisi ki aati hai
aakhaon se neend ud jaati hai
milne ki lagan tadpati hai
jab yaad kisi ki aati hai
jab in aankhon mein pyaar machal kar rotaa hai
dil duniya bhar ke dard mein doobaa hotaa hai
har saans meri ghabraati hai
meri jaan pe ban ban jaati hai
jab yaad kisi ki aati hai
When I miss you, O my beloved..
eyes cannot fall sleep
heart aches to be with the beloved
When I miss you, O my beloved
when love hurts so much it trickles as tears from my eyes
my heart fills with intense pain
every breath I take makes me feel vulnerable
I feel that I won't live (being away from you)
When I miss you, O my beloved
Shyam cleverly talks Anjali into letting him bring lunch for Khushi in her room. When Khushi opens the door, she finds Shyam at the door with Lunch tray. She asks him to leave in a firm voice. He makes an excuse of what to say if Anjali asks about Khushi's lunch. Khushi firmly tells him to say that she just did not eat. Determined, Khushi closes the door in Shyam's face. Shyam is a devil- soulless devil - he opens the door, despite Khushi's not giving consent, he enters her sanctuary forcibly...sanctuary of Arnav's memories... he closes the door behind him..as Khushi tries to protest, "How dare you?" He calmly looks at her with lustful eyes and threateningly says to her not to turn the food down..cheaply offers to feed her...Disgusted, Khushi takes a quick bite but then she makes a huge mistake... Khushi challenges him to eat..puts all the spices in the lentil and dares him to eat fiercely... Shyam, the soulless devil, detrmined in his intentions to the fullest..does not give up..he surprises Khushi by gulping down the spiced lentil in one breath... And then he warns her seriously, "Never challenge my admiration for you... you will lose..lose big time just like every time you have so far..See you!"
(Authors Note: Beautifully shot scene - cinematography was just wonderful with close ups of Khushi framed with Shyam's arms, close up of Shyam with the bowl at his mouth...stunning!)
Untold Emotions:
When Khushi gets to the temple, her senses are overwhelmed by Arnav's memories..her longing for him..makes her blindsighted to the papers he holds in his hands for a while as she walks towards him...the papers as he places those in his backpocket..an opportunity lost..because she is lost in love!
Anjali's mind is getting bad wibes about her husband's not so devoted behavior like earlier times... will she share her secret with us..not so soon...
Khushi gets angry at Arnav for not calling her..but she forgets that she is expecting..expecting something as delicate as him calling her to let her know that he is safe..why does her poor heart expect this when he left without listening to her plea..? Another sign that she is in love..she has expectations from him... On the other hand her mind, heart, soul -- are drenched in worry about Arnav..longing for Arnav... She is completely governed by him even in his abscence... when in fact, is her golden opportunity to live free..while he is gone..but she has made herself prisoner of his memories...
Shaym claims to love Khushi but he cannot belong to anyone... if he loved her, he would not be able to see her in pain..Arnav cannot see Khushi in pain..even when he pretends to neglect, his heart churns for her...he hurts himself when he neglects her..Shaym will go any lenghths to obtain what he wants..what he forgets is that..Arnav can go any lengths that he needs to when he sets his heart on something, just like his mind!
Khushi's thoughts about her realtionship with Arnav begin with images of hatred..migrate through...images of care and passion...ultimately culminating into the most painful memory of the moment of her marriage..still her heart gives her the verdict that she can look beyond all of it as her heart knows..her heart knows that there is something very precious hidden underneath all of those unpleasant things...she does not give it a name..but we all know it..it's called- LOVE!
Here come the first time lovers, trading the path of their first love...each one oblivoius to the pain the other one is bearing....one of them realizing their love for the other...beautifully..just like opening of the petals of a flower...❤️❤️❤️
Arnav and Khushi - Khushi and Arnav -
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Edited by Lovely1 - 13 years ago
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