Part 4 ' Bring her back' Don't even talk to him!
"Chote, slow down and start again, because whatever you just said made no sense at all." Di said and I closed my, frustrated yet again. After some 11 odd years of my life I was going to open up to someone and tell them everything that was in my heart.
"I don't know what's wrong with me these days. I cannot stop thinking about her, everywhere I look, I find something or the other to remind me of her. I dream about her when I sleep. And this is the worst thing' I miss her. I mean' I missher!" I rambled.
"Her? Who? Lavanya?" Di shook her head in mock confusion and I glared at her. She knew I was talking about Khushi. I had told her before I began. As I was about to tell her who I was talking about, she cracked up laughing, pushing me over the edge.
"Di, what is so funny?" I screamed. Her eyes went wide with fear and at that very moment, I remembered Khushi's eyes in the fashion show, full of fear. "Sorry." I mumbled. "You know di, I saw the fear in your eyes and yet again I was remembering Khushi. It is so annoying. I hate her don't I?"
"Or do you?" She raised an eyebrow and I sighed. Just tell me what's wrong with me! I hate riddles.
****
"Umm' Jiji. Are you going to tell me what you wanted to talk to me about?" I asked. We had been roaming around aimlessly for the past 5 minutes in the park, and jiji had not spoken a word.
"I don't know. You tell me. Aren't you hiding something? Sleepless nights? Being completely lost in thoughts? Don't you have to tell me all this?"
"Uh' ummm' do I?"
"Khushi!" Jiji stared at me, exasperated. "I thought there were no secrets between us."
"No, there are no secrets." I muttered.
"Oh you are such a bad liar. Come on! Spit it out."
"Um' okay. Icannotstop '" Jiji stared at me, wide-eyed with confusion plastered on her face. Slow down Khushi, slow down. "I cannot stop thinking about ASR. I don't know why, but I just cannot. And I am missing him a lot and I am missing the fights, all that bickering, all that work." I sighed. It felt good to have shared my thoughts with someone.
"Then go back, work." You would think that she was angry, but she was not.
"Umm' no. I am not going to work there. He'll think I got scared of his threats and no way in hell am I letting him think that. I am just going to go, give him his key and get my stuff and come back. That's it."
"Are you sure Khushi?"
"Ya," I said, quiet unsure actually. "I think so." Di smiled at me and nodded.
"You know what's best for you."
"But jiji, why am I feeling this pull towards him? Why do I want to see him?" I said and di chuckled. "What? What's so funny?" I whined and pouted sadly.
"You are such an idiot Khushi. You have always wanted a fairy-tale for yourself and you cannot understand your own feelings now?" I kept on staring at di, nothing made sense at all. "You are so dim-witted Khushi! You are attracted to him you moron! That's why all these feelings!" She shook her head and then walked away, leaving me behind, completely dumbfounded.
I ran to catch up with her. "Jiji. Are you serious?" I asked, dreading the response. I mean, how can someone be attracted to that raakshas (monster)? And especially me!
"Believe it or not Khushi, but that is the truth! And believe it or not, but the way he was looking at you that night, the way he caringly brought you inside the house, I think he too is attracted to you."
****
"Chote! Why are you so dumb? You are attracted to her. Obviously!" Di spoke and I laughed.
"Good joke di. But seriously, I want the truth. Not jokes."
"I am not joking chote! Why would I joke about this? Anything but this!"
"So you are telling me that I am attracted to that Khushi? To her? I hate her alright! I seriously do."
"Oh really? Then why do you dream about her? Why do you miss her? Why do think about her always? Because you hate her! Oh, she is such a close enemy is she? Seriously Arnav, the fact is staring at you right in the face and you are refusing it. Open your eyes, wake up."
"Di, are you for real?"
"Yes I am."
I sighed and sat on my bed. As much as I wanted to deny it, I knew di was right. I was attracted to her, from the moment I had seen her in that red saree, I knew I was smitten by her beauty.
"Uh, chote! Why are you smiling?"
I was smiling? "Oh, umm, nothing. Di, so' err' what am I meant to do now?"
"Isn't it obvious? Ask her to come back."
"What?!" I screamed. "No way in hell am I ever doing that! She will think I lost and no' that is not the case."
"You know, that's your problem." I looked at di, frowning. "Your ego!"
"Oh!"
"Either ask her to come back or just die out of misery." And with that, she got up and started to leave. I had never seen her get angry like this before. I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard the door open.
"Di! Fine, fine. I' I'll call her back. But she won't listen to me, that's for sure."
"Why?"
"She has an ego as big as me and her self-respect' oh god! She makes a huge deal out of it!" And that's when the struck me. Oh I felt so god damn smart.
"Excuse me! Care to tell me what you are thinking about?"
"Nothing really, just thinking about the fact that I am going to win yet again."
****
"Jiji' are you kidding me? He can never be attracted to me. He hates me alright. He really, really does."
"Think whatever you want to. Right now, you need to go and give his key back. I think you should just go."
"I will go. But umm' what about bhuaji?"
"Oh." was all that jiji could manage.
"I know what to say to her! You don't worry!"
I walked back to the house and told Bhuaji I needed to get that deity of devi maiiya back because it was given by bauji. After a lot of persuading she finally agreed and for some odd reason, jiji kept on grinning at me, as if both of us were getting married. Seriously, since when did she start getting hyper?
****
I dialled her number and heard the phone ring.
"Hello." My heart raced as I heard her speak on the other end. My voice got stuck in my throat and I couldn't speak. "Hello? What the hell! If you don't want to talk then why do you call?"
I chuckled as I heard her speak in utter frustration. "Miss Gupta. It's me. ASR."
****
My heart danced in joy as I heard him speak. I felt as if I had been showered with jalebis. "Um' why did you call?"
"I need you to come to the office and'" Why does he want me to come back? I felt happy, he wanted me back. "collect your things and empty the desk."
"Oh!" So, just empty the desk. Oh well, that's what I wanted as well, right? "Ya, okay. I will be there soon. In' half an hour." And I hung up. "Bhuaji, I'll get going. Uh' he wants me to empty the desk as well. That's what he called for. So' um' I'll go." And I quickly stepped out, hoping no one saw the disappointment on my face. Hoping I would be able to hide the disappointment from him.
O~o~o~o~O
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Lots of love
Jyotika
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Edited by ..Jojo.. - 13 years ago
Taarak Mehta Ka Ooltah Chashmah
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