NEED HELP !!! PLZ !! with My Frustration regarding Chandini !!! - Page 3

Originally posted by: PSharada

Deeps - I am so so proud of you. I totally understand what you are saying. Our circumstances do shape us to the people we are. But I am proud of you girl for making the best of your life and moving forward. I wish you all the best in your life and hope you always have happiness in your personal and professional life.

Originally posted by: -Bhavi

Ditto Deeps you are a rockstar and the real hero. No wonder your female leads are all heroes 👏

Originally posted by: -Sush-

For me...it is very simple...

Chandani is a good soul...who has been manipulated by Indrani as a child...she has innocently said things that have helped Indranis wicked plans to destroy Devs family...

CHandani trusted Dev...and is still hopeful that he will show up to save her...

She feels very indebted to her step mother for providing her a family, and protecting her...

She feels she has to do whatever she can to pay back to the family who has been so good to her...

The kidnapping has traumatized her...but she has kept her fighting spirit...

I don't see her as a broken soul...A broken soul is not full of care for others...Chandani is like a gentle light that takes away darkness...soothing to everyone...meaning no harm...

She is unsure why Advay says the things he says about her...as far as she knows...he doesn't even know her...so she brushes off what she can't explain...

She knows the thought of PP touching her makes her cringe...

She knows...somehow that's not the case with Advay...she feels physically attracted to him...

Although she brushes that aside...she is too traditional ...She does know that Advay does not like her family...and is not only holding grudges against them...he is deliberatily trying to show them down...

She doesn't like that...

She protects her family in every way she can...Protecting Megha from being social outcast for being an unwed mother was also a part of that...She wasn't thinking what is right ...what is wrong...she wanted to protect Meghna and Indrani ...and she thought that she could do that only by giving up the baby and not telling Meghna ..and that was that.

THere you have it...Chandani in a nutshell...what I didn't understand is why so many people on IF have such a tough time figuring Chandani ...I have made a mental note to ask my mom in India ...what she thinks about. Chandani...provided she is still watching IPK...😃

Oh...BTW...I do not understand the Sati Savitri comment...How can Chandani be Sati Savitri if there is no Satyavan in the picture? On the contrary...she is one of the very few FL who is actually displaying physical attraction to a guy ...who is not the "good boy" by any books...😆

Originally posted by: ToxicLove

Oh I love this post. I am going to come back and see if I can try explaining Chandini, esp on giving the baby away...😳

Edited ***

I am back to write my 2 cents on Chandini but before I get to her characterization...there is something I wanna share.

Coming from a broken/disoriented family, I grew up as a timid, shy, silent girl. At a very very very young age, I watched my mother break down, fight against the life she was forced into, fight against every single person who planned to get me and my sister married after we complete 10th grade. She became fierce, independent, didnt care who supported her and who didnt. I was so proud of her, still am!

I have to admit, I was never into studies but seeing her struggle so hard to get us to a position where we could stand on our own feet, made me zealous and accomplish something that she could be proud of. And that's where it all started, as a token of gratitude for not abandoning us, I began to do things that would please her, that would make her happy. Over the years, she took some decisions that I was not really thrilled about but I chose to stay silent because that's what made her content, and ultimately happy.

As I entered into pre-teen years, my maternal family who initially showed their backs to us, started showing up at our doors, visiting us for vacations. That's where I fell weak further. Before that moment, I and my sister spent several summers/ celebrated festivals without cousins or the extended family. Our life was pretty much limited to four walls because basically we had none. So when they came back to us whether to show love or fake love, I was thrilled, I craved for their attention, and wanted to do things that would make them stick to us, to love us longer. We would give away all our (hard-earned) toys to our cousins (without mom's knowledge) simply because they would come back to us next summer at least for the new toys, if not for us! Does this emotionally connect me to Chandini? Oh Hell Yes!

Now that pleasing thingy went on for years, until one day I decided to go against my mother. It was the time my family was looking for suitor for my little sister. A guy was chosen, my family (except me and my sister) met them, they all liked his family and the guy himself. Since I was living in another town, (happily married) were asked to fly down to meet the guy. I along with my husband flew down to the guy's town and 5 mins into the meeting I knew what would be the fate of my sister if she end up marrying that guy. I returned home and told my mom that that guy is not a fit. Now remember, I didnt even discuss this with my sister who is supposed to have a say. I didnt ask her because I simply knew she would be better off without that guy. Now you can question me who am I to decide on my sister's behalf? Fair enough, it's a very valid question! But but...

Because, I knew my mother, my family, and how my sister is, and the kind of struggles we went through the childhood, I took a decision in the best interest of her. And this is exactly what Chandini had done. She didnt think if she was taking right decision or wrong decision giving the baby away. As far she knew she took a decision in the best interest of Meghu, with no malign intent.

Tomorrow my sister can come back to me and question me why had I interfered in her life. Honestly I will not have a concrete answer but as an elder sister/well wisher I did what I thought was best for her. Same way, Chandini may not have an answer for Meghana but she did what she thought was best for her little sister.

That being said, if we still want to give it a logical approach then I have to point this out...Chandini knows how it feels like to live every single day without having a true motherly love. If a woman like her had taken such a drastic decision, then don't you think it suggests there could probably be something more to the story? Something more compromising might have happened with Vashisht family or at least with Meghana that forced Chandini to do this?

We still do not know what exactly happened to Meghu at that time. So it is too early and very unfair for everyone in the forum to judge her (and Meghu for being the way she is now) But whatever might have happened, when a person (not just Chandini but anyone around us) does something like that, instead of passing a logical judgement that she shouldn't have done it or he should have done it that way...It is very important to understand there must be a reason for them (Chandini) to react that way, to decide that way. And the only person who can decide if Chandini's decision is wrong or right in this case is strictly Meghana's but no one else!

I don't mean to offend anyone with my take, but I have been waiting patiently for so many days hoping people will understand and connect to Chandini. But as days pass by I am more and more baffled as to why no one is able to relate to her. Do we have to go through something so miserable like her to understand the way she is behaving? A question that we all need to question ourselves!

PS: Chitra, thank you for posting this question. I ended up writing a composition here😆...So rambled alot! 😆😆 But calling Chandini as AblaNari and Sati Savriti kinda rubbed me in a wrong way, made me abit emotional too...but No hard feelings, I understand every one has their perspective. I just want to put mine across.

Originally posted by: deeps_92

Akka ...big hug to you🤗...u and ur mother r such a strong people...I already guessed it reading ur ff's...

coming from male dominated family and having strong mother, I can relate to most of it

I agree with u akka...i really feel we should not judge chandu or meghu until we know the full story...

Originally posted by: ToxicLove

Thank You 😳

Disclaimer: long ass comment. Prepare yourselves!

Okay, so before I comment, let me be clear that, I am one of those people who can not connect with Chandni.

But...

But I do understand her. Atleast a good portion of her (untill d CVS decide to butcher her characterization n add a total tangent shade again)

What I assumed of Chandni from d initial episodes is...she's like that swan amongst a murder.

Pure, brave, head-heart in right places - warrior in every sense.

She was a perfect blend of wisdom n naivety, maturity n innocence, vulnerabilities n strength, pain n fun. N I really really loved her for that.

She, IMO, was one hell of a strong character. A one that is really inspiring sorts. N pretty close to reality.

But then either CVS began to add layers to her, or d trps r forced them to do so, and we had shades of Gray induced n introduced.

N trust me, that was d best time I had understanding this character - Chandni.

Coz..no person is entirely white it black. We're all in d shades of Gray.

N so was Chandni.

Though it took me by surprise, her sass, her lies, her fake videos..though they contradict d previous weeks, they showed how Chandni any other girl, who would not hesitate to do stuff that would protect her family.

And why not? What has Advay been to her?

Downright s Challenger who owed to destroy her. N she has had no reason to believe that he too might b a good person behind n beneath all his manipulative stuff. N I really appreciate that.

Coz hey, if a man comes n owes to destroy my family n me, I wouldn't give him a benefit of doubt that may be he's good n I can talk him out. Hell no. I'll try my best to get rid of him, or get us out of his path.

It was d nails thing that completely threw me off my feet. I lost whatever understanding I had of her till then. Or rather. my understanding came to a stand still with way too stark contradiction of staring wide eyed at me.

Irrespective of whether she thought he'd not walk ahead or not, planting nails on d path that physically hurt some one...was too much for me. N honestly I can't understand that bit even to this day. (so, I guess I choose to ignore it)

And from then on, it was On-Off, almost like whiplashes with every episode. The CVS just loved, love to experiment with Chandni's character to a point of butchering it that, now I don't find any solid pillar of her characterization that I can lean upon n understand d rest of her based on this pillar.

But that being said, I guess in all this hullabaloo mess they made of her, there are a few things I understood of her. May b that's coz I'm trying hard to figure her out, or may b coz she's really there but I've been dumb n blind all this long (still am?)

1. Chandini is a broken soul herself. : Okay I am willing to give her that. She has had a lot to deal with with her dad, mum ,stepmum , Dev and above all with Meghu recently while having to deal with her own kidnapping trauma and PTSD.

1. Chandini loves Aday : No I dont think she loves him , tho she is attracted towards him and is confused why. She is clearly torn between her love for Dev and her attraction for Advay, Dont blame her coz Advay is way ttooo hottt to handle😳 !! HEHE😉

1. Chandini trusts Advay (not)

1. Also I read somewhere that Advay only speaks the truth to chandini, I disagree on that too, coz Advay hasn't first of all told his reality to her. ( AKA abt DEV ) , also Advay always puts Chandini in trouble with her family,

1. Chandini decided to give the baby away and did Meghu a favor :

Again, I'm on mixed views with d Mahaan-Aatma track introduced to chandni's character.(apologies, I don't really understand what sati-savitri means, or rather why she's brought here. Isn't sati-savitri someone who is uber loyal to her hubby? Apologies again . Its my ignorance, not my intention to offend or something)

While I could NOT connect initially, over a detailed musing n discussion with Uthra Akka, I've realised ki...I kinda understand her? Or may be from where she's coming?

See, *Touchwood* I'm from an extremely happy family. Just d 4 of us. Details left uncovered, I haven't grown up amongst relatives whom one can rely upon. Even to this day. So, even though I have an extremely huge family that could make up a mini town or something, when I say family, I mean just d 4 of us.

But when I was a kid, I was thrilled with d idea of having relatives visit us. Looking back, despite d love I had from my parents, I think I wanted their love, appreciation n acceptance too. But then I grew up. Saw a few things, learnt a few things n I realised that..I don't want anything more than I already have.

So, if I were to think of Chandni that way, I understand her need n will to impress her mom, to get her acceptance n love, b that at any cost.

But the problem is, I can connect that with a kiddo Chandni not d grown up one.

So yeah, there are times I understand her n there are times I just facepalm myself.

But then I realised...Chandni knows her mom doesn't really love Her.

But that's that. She doesn't know that her mom has an evil side to her.

And then it again began to make sense, well, with a face-palm here n there. But sensible, nevertheless at least to an extent.

So, once d real or rather dark shade of her mom comes out, this 'my Pyaar will make her majboor to pyaar me back' is gonna break! (I hope so)

So yes, I do understand this bit of her now.

Advay does bring out d real self of her. Be that d best or d worst; he challenges her, makes her face her fears n win them, even if indirectly n unintentionally.

N I believe that women have his innate intuition about people. Gut feeling? That's what makes or rather pushes Chandni stand back against advay. N be her innate, real self around him.

Coz deep down, she knows he's many a things that she's both privy n not privy to, but not a perv or a sleazebag.

See, Chandni as a wholesome character is difficult to understand n analyse n connect to, atleast for me. But when taken bits n pieces of her, she's actually a regular normal girl.

A girl with a shade n two of gray. A girl who has been through hell n is still standing up with a smile.

She intact is an extremely strong character with heck loads of potential.

Now, if d CVS would brew her character in d proper channel;

Chandni Yash Narayan vashist will b one really admirable character.

That's what I understood of Chandni so far. It's all half baked but hey, I'm trying!

~~~~~edited

@Deepthi Akka, there's a reason I not just admire you, but also respect you. And...lets just say that my respect has multiplied and cemented stronger than before.