Does the baby deserve pakhi ka gutter jaisa kokh - Page 16

Originally posted by: Moor278

No dear.. that was not the point of the post...

I suggest you read Gauris post and then mine... With open mind

It was a comment on 'would Sai had married V knowing his nature if she was not forced?'

Externally keeping KJ's death situation aside... Sai might have been tempted to marry V in future if KJ had been alive.

So all the description and discussion are only till SaiRat marriage.

And if Sai had been BK's choice or if they had accepted Sai right away.. itna hungama bhi nahi hota aur itni story nahi badhti.

Why does everyone like GC wala V? Because he is a sensitive mature human being. We all keep him as reference.

That person flips completely when he is back to CN and confronted with situations beyond his understanding and beyond his control. Can you really predict how someone will behave?

How was Sai to know that he will behave like this in future? Had everything been perfectly alright, this V would not have surfaced and he would have been the GC wala V version that everyone remembers and loves.

So no.. it wasn't a comment on how he behaved later or why Sai should have rejected him. He seemed like a good enough person at that time that KJ trusted him. I am not going into the ambiguity of the vaada KJ took from him because that is open to interpretation. (In LB.. Marathi ghum.. KJ dies in both of their presence and he specifically puts her hand in his.. implying marriage)

The other point being this is show.. if the characters won't behave in a certain manner, the story won't move and neither Ghum makers have that sort of creativity.

V's behaviour to Sai is on the spectrum of abuse.. theres no denying that and neither am I justifying it.

That post was only till SaiRat marriage and real life scenarios where it's not easy to walk out of marriage because of a tiff. A marriage can break because of difference between two individuals... Not because of a third party.

Whatever V behaves with P is part of the story but his mindset is he loves Sai and she loves him. I don't know why they should give up on each other when they can work it out between themselves. Court bhi 6 months ka time deta hai... Ye to fiction hai

If everything gets smooth in life, then everyone is good human being.

Even pakhi would have remained good human being had she married virat.

Even if pakhi is not there, sai is of kaku's choice, Sai would have still tried to help devi going by her nature, virat would have still ousted her.

Had he was good human being he would have yelled at his wife, shouted at her as a broken husband but wouldn't have denied her food, wouldn't have ousted her.

Atleast would have respectfully divorced her instead of calling her mentally unstable infront of everyone.

He choosed to react in toxic way when a complicated situation arised. That's what revealed his real character.

Sai too got betrayed by him many times but did she ever did something that would risk his health or life, did she ever starved him, did she ever locked him to PUNISH HIM,did she ever questioned his parents upbringing like he did.

Never. That's the difference.

Even going by the scenario of initial marriage phase, I don't see them getting married.

Virat saw her as a kid. He might have attracted to her but not sure as a woman.

Sai might have impressed with his honesty but not as her life partner. Because at that age her only goal was her career.

Kj wouldn't let her marry until she finish her studies. On top of it virat sai has more than 15 years age gap.

@italic This is where I am disagreeing. Whatever happened between virat sai is not because of pakhi(third party). Pakhi didn't ask virat to least prioritise his wife, to become insensitive towards wife feelings, from aj track to shruti track it is virat who is responsible not pakhi. Virat could have easily erased the third party in his married life by maintaining boundaries. But he didn't. That's what makes his character questionable.

@bold because here virat gave up on sai long back. After anniversary track, he mentally abused her, after shruti track he was ready to give her divorce instead of clearing her misunderstanding, he himself said he lost love on sai but her efforts brought back that love. Had sai didn't make such efforts he would have easily moved on. It is only Sai who isn't giving up on virat. Tolerating his family abuse, his toxic traits, his ex interference for the sake of this relationship.

Efforts are always one sided. When efforts r one sided how long can such relationship survive? Even if it survives, is it worth it?

Also how can we over look virat behaviour towards pakhi by justifying it as part of story. Just because he says I love sai, we should overlook his actions towards pakhi. His love is seen only in words not in actions. That's the problem.

Originally posted by: msin

There are many people living in this world .. some chose to lead a life of independence, chosing their self respect above everything else .. and some who chose to compromise on many things but wish to lead life with a partner who they desire ..

we cannot say this one is wrong or that one is .. it’s the person who is wearing the shoe who can take a call whether to wear it or walk bare feet

one size or axiom cannot fit all .. and I will leave it that .. 😊

Okay..

This would be my final reply because we are going in circles...

My initial reply to Gauri and Msin was only till SaiRat marriage and whether she would have accepted him if she was not forced. The age difference is not clearly mentioned and people do get married with age gaps. So let's just leave that.

Also said that it was from the perspective of if KJ had been alive. Even if they married later out of consent, V ka ye wala face nahi dikhta kisiko until faced with difficult situations.

The second part is what I wrote in the recent comment... Agar sab sahi hota to V ka ye roop bahar nahi aata. It was circumstantial. Agar Sai ki baat sahi tarike se suni jaati... Chavans were not toxic to Devi ka kaand, ousting kuch nahi hota...

Please understand what I am trying to say with open mind.

I am not justifying his behaviour... Only saying that Sai and all of us... Love a V version which we saw in GC. That person reacted very differently when faced with situations which neither you or me can predict.

Aur agar ye real life hota to vahi GC wala V rehta Jo apni biwi ko leke Ghar se nikal gaya hota.. right on the first instance she was abused by the family but he stood by her. Aka admission day.

This is a show and this is a fiction. I agree it gets on our nerves and we don't want to see such characters... But then that's the choice we have. Because this is a show, we can skip viewing it.

In real life people face this issue.

And why the makers are intent on showing it is something only they can answer. It's beyond my or your control.

Peace out ✌🏼✌🏼

Originally posted by: Moor278

Okay..

This would be my final reply because we are going in circles...

My initial reply to Gauri and Msin was only till SaiRat marriage and whether she would have accepted him if she was not forced. The age difference is not clearly mentioned and people do get married with age gaps. So let's just leave that.

Also said that it was from the perspective of if KJ had been alive. Even if they married later out of consent, V ka ye wala face nahi dikhta kisiko until faced with difficult situations.

The second part is what I wrote in the recent comment... Agar sab sahi hota to V ka ye roop bahar nahi aata. It was circumstantial. Agar Sai ki baat sahi tarike se suni jaati... Chavans were not toxic to Devi ka kaand, ousting kuch nahi hota...

Please understand what I am trying to say with open mind.

I am not justifying his behaviour... Only saying that Sai and all of us... Love a V version which we saw in GC. That person reacted very differently when faced with situations which neither you or me can predict.

Aur agar ye real life hota to vahi GC wala V rehta Jo apni biwi ko leke Ghar se nikal gaya hota.. right on the first instance she was abused by the family but he stood by her. Aka admission day.

This is a show and this is a fiction. I agree it gets on our nerves and we don't want to see such characters... But then that's the choice we have. Because this is a show, we can skip viewing it.

In real life people face this issue.

And why the makers are intent on showing it is something only they can answer. It's beyond my or your control.

Peace out ✌🏼✌🏼

A person's real behaviour comes out when he was faced with difficult situations not when life goes smooth.

We can say same for pakhi too.

Pakhi would have remained good human being had she got marry to virat. When it didn't happen, she turned abusive. That's her real character.

Same way virat toxic traits revealed when he was faced with unpredictable situation. That's his real character.

Nothing is circumstantial. It is in the person's hand how to handle a situation. Virat and pakhi choosed toxic ways when something happened against their wish.

GC virat also gave hopes to pakhi, gave her immoral vaada,when returning to home he choosed to inform his bhabi instead of his mother, he choosed to give explanation to her for every thing as if he was obliged, openly said u don't need to knock room door when she knocked the door on sairat marriage day. He gave her that right to interfere. He was like that since beginning. But it's just that we couldn't notice it.

Those actions are justified in the name of heartbreak, situational.

He was delicate with sai as long as he saw her as his guru's daughter.

Shruti track proved there is no difference between shruti and GC sai to him. As he went to great extent for shruti even more than for Sai.

If i want to describe V character in simple words - V is an image conscious and go with the flow kind of person.

During haldi he met pakhi, so he only thought about his image, so he admitted that he is in love with her, to prove his innocence he had shown the messages which he sent to P..but how failed to understand how his actions impact on P, so P demanded him to marry her....then he came to reality again image conscious, he doesn't want to spoil his image infront of family members and at the same not ready to fight for love.so he said he vl nt marry her, sangeet night also he wants to save his good brother image, so had given promise to P.

After Kamal Joshi death, he was more interested to protect his image to prove his innocence because hold him as responsible for KJ' S death.

That night, if sai wud nt attempted suicide, am 200% sure he vl never turned up to gadchiroli.

After sai suicide attempt, villagers questioned about his words, so he agreed to marriage, here he least bothered to inform to him family members, sai consent is also not important only one thing which is there in his mind, his image, so he called pakhi to gadchiroli, not even once he had given thought of consequences.

There are many such examples....

Originally posted by: Thanuj

If i want to describe V character in simple words - V is an image conscious and go with the flow kind of person.

During haldi he met pakhi, so he only thought about his image, so he admitted that he is in love with her, to prove his innocence he had shown the messages which he sent to P..but how failed to understand how his actions impact on P, so P demanded him to marry her....then he came to reality again image conscious, he doesn't want to spoil his image infront of family members and at the same not ready to fight for love.so he said he vl nt marry her, sangeet night also he wants to save his good brother image, so had given promise to P.

After Kamal Joshi death, he was more interested to protect his image to prove his innocence because hold him as responsible for KJ' S death.

That night, if sai wud nt attempted suicide, am 200% sure he vl never turned up to gadchiroli.

After sai suicide attempt, villagers questioned about his words, so he agreed to marriage, here he least bothered to inform to him family members, sai consent is also not important only one thing which is there in his mind, his image, so he called pakhi to gadchiroli, not even once he had given thought of consequences.

There are many such examples....

Looks like we are all going to do PhD in analysing these 3 characters....

He has done the same with his parents, he got love from his both parents, but he never tried to solve their differences until sai pointed out. That time also only because of sai support and encouragement he tried to resolve their issues....

Originally posted by: Kumuda-123

Of course no one denied that sai herself choosed virat after shruti track.

Despite seeing his terrible side, that's why I call her doormat.

She choosed virat over her self respect. Virat and his family terribly insulted her for her no fault. She happily accepted it as a clown. She don't mind getting insulted daily for the sake of living with virat.

Had kamal Joshi was alive, would he made his daughter go through this ? Never. He would have convinced his daughter that she is in toxic relationship.

Before shruti track sai herself tried to leave that house many times. Had virat and aswini didn't manipulate her emotionally she would have ended this relationship long back for her mental peace.

Everyone knows ending a relationship is not a easy task that too when u r orphan.

But at what cost? Daily taking insults, getting taunted, husband prioritising ex over wife, ex openly claiming rights on her husband, husband abandoning her at crucial situations, getting name called by the elders and husband not minding it.

Didn't virat take vows? Or only Sai is liable to respect those vows. A relationship is two ways.

How long it can survive with only one person efforts?

Had sai ended this relationship long back instead of compromising her self respect. Now she wouldn't have become infertile.

She may or may not find a good partner but atleast she wouldn't have become infertile.

Normalising someone living in a toxic relationship for the sake of vows and normalising the abuse virat did in the name of normal husband wife tiff because of third party is 💁.

Living respectful life alone is greater than living a life where u always given last priority in ur husband's life & live in the house where u are not respected even as a human.

Just because Sai loves virat, sai accepts his family, it doesn't undo the fact that virat & his family is toxic & no girl deserves such life.

No parent would want his daughter to live in such relationship.

I agree with most of this except the "doormat" part. Its too harsh. Yea she has been emotionally manipulated but she's the victim of circumstances, emotions, conditioning. She has tried to walk out and unfortunately she has no strong support. I'm confident that whatever she is tolerating will eventually reach a threshold and after that she will break and rise like a phoenix. She has chosen to put her faith in the institution of marriage and the man her father had trusted. But that doesn't make her a doormat. She still knows right/wrong, she is just deciding what to react to and what to let go because in her limited world view she has really no example of anything ideal, better. she has not seen her own parents marriage, not had close friends with ideal families, had conservative and fake neighbors/well wishers like GC folks and UM who treated her as a liability and a thing to be disposed of...she has grown up alone with sexual harassment by Jaggy for 1-2 years as a young adult. So her standards/bar are already low. V doesn't come across as a criminal on the outside like Jaggu but in reality he does much more emotional damage unwittingly because he never realizes how much his behavior can and has wounded Sai.

Originally posted by: Moor278

Absolutely not...

I have said this earlier... I will say it again... why should Sai walk out of her marriage because of a misunderstanding / conflict created by Pakhi? Who is she that Sai should be bothered about?

Sai has more rights on V than anyone else...

It is a show and their need for drama otherwise in real life, SaiRat would have moved out of CN and lived happily. Even right now, if they have the guts, Sai can very well assert her rights and get P to do everything the way she wants to...

Agreed V is stupid but then again this is a show... Men are not so dumb in real life. Anyone in V's position would have either created the distance with such a woman or would have taken up her offer and bedded her. 🤢

The writers are making him stupid so that the show can run... 🤣.

V ko akal aa gai to show main kya dikhayenge? Itni creativity to inke paas hai nahi.

So Sai is doing whatever she can by making him see P's motives. He will someday I hope

Walking out of a marriage is easier said than done. You can break friendships but it would be difficult to break spousal relationship with the kind of society we live in. And if at all, a relationship has to break, it should break because the two persons could not gel with each other. Breaking a relationship because of interference of a third person is illogical. Sai and V love each other whether we agree to it or not. So them parting because of P or the family makes no sense.

Sai shouldn't leave because of pp or family, she should leave because she realizes that she deserves better, a person and a family who will value her, her self respect, her ideals and person/people will support her without things reaching an extreme. Unfortunately Sai will never realize that because she lacks any examples that are better. In her limited world view things aren't necessarily any better outside plus over time she has got emotionally attached, manipulated and conditioned and now it's too late. Stockholm syndrome. The only thing is Sai's core personality is not like Ashwini. So she will tolerate but when things pile up she will have an outburst. And that can force her to get up and leave. Its many small things that are accumulating without any outlet. One day the volcano may burst. If V does some course correction, maybe it'll become a dormant volcano but if he doesn't fix himself then she will certainly burst!