|| NASHA - An Addiction ||
Introduction
I have led my life at worst so painful, at the best so monotonous, poor and limited that the urge to escape, the longing for love and to transcend myself if only for a few moments to feel that overwhelming sense of euphoria, always has been one of the major principal appetites of my soul; That is - DRUGS.
The best way to convey the truth about drugs is through the words of those who have been there. By telling their stories, they can pass on what they have learned so others avoid going down the same path.
This is a true story of my life which I want to re-write it on MAANEET only as far as was necessary to conceal personalities which will help my story to reach our society. It is a story of hope and the beauty of finding the lost dark soul in pit of darkness called NASHA - An Addiction. It reveals with startling clearness the abyss on which our civilization trembles. But the self-light illuminates the path of humanity and it is our own fault if we go over the brink. This story is also true not only of one kind of human weakness, but of all kinds and for all alike there is but one way of salvation. I have had to experience so much stupidity, so many vices, so much error, so much nausea, disillusionment and sorrow, just in order to become a human again and begin anew. I had to experience despair; I had to sink to the greatest mental depths, to thoughts of suicide, in order to experience grace and purpose of this life.
As they say "Man is not subjected to the angels, nor even unto death utterly, saves through the weakness of his own feeble will"
This is not a typical fantasy story, I will be narrating this story as Maan Singh Khurana and sometimes Geet Handa. I am not giving prologue or character sketch for this story because here Maan and Geet are two random people caught up in the world of NASHA and their struggle to find Nirvana.
It will be a short story of 4 or 5 max parts which I intend to keep it short and sweet. I will update this SS every once in 15 days; it means I may give double or triple updates. Let me know your view on this story and concept.
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|| Chapter 1 ||
I looked into her eyes and saw immediately that her pupils were looked glassy, pinned, shrunken to little black beads. Any junkie knows what that means. Damn it, he'd done it again.
The relapse, the inevitable relapse but my resolve faded fast when I met her drowsy eyes staring at me in hopefulness and a pack of white cocaine in hand. I wanted that. I wanted to feel the same overwhelming euphoria, something and nothing all at the same time.
"Give it to me damn it" I demanded her. She said immediately "No".
"Damn it Sam..I need it..give it to me" I said. And then I begged. "Come on. I want to know what you're feeling. You have to. You owe me sam"
She had no more resolve than I did. "Okay, but you're snorting, not shooting. I'll cook it down and water it"
She had a fountain pen she'd long since emptied of ink. It worked like a straw, she half-filled with cocaine and then handing over to me.
It's torture, that voice"the one inside the addict's head that's always whispering, "It's okay if you do this. No.. really... It'll be okay." Whose voice is that? I guess on some level, it was always my own.
Once I'd snorted the cocaine up my nose, I sat down on the couch and waited. It was the foulest-tasting thing I'd ever experienced; even now, I can taste it on the back of my throat. But there'll be a payoff, I thought, and waited few more minutes to kick off. Nothing happened.. had sam diluted it too much? And if she had, was she trying to save me, or was she just drug-hogging? Given our past, it was likely a combination of both. I wanted something to happen, but long minutes passed and nothing did.
I said suddenly maintaining my balance to stand still and keep eyes open"I have to go home"
"We'll go with you maan" my both best friends Sameera(sam) and Angad(Angy) said swaying trying to stand at one place. Yes, of course. We got into sam's BMW and drove madly on Delh's high streets. I felt so light and nirvana when a wind blew on my face,
I maybe screamed or yelled "drive faster... faster" and then I heard a long silence after a loud crashing sound. My ears ringed and deafened for some time, last thing I remembered seeing sam's smiling face fading and Angad kissing sam with his bloodied mouth.
An addict's brain remembers where it left off when sobriety began, and it takes no time at all to get back there. I moaned when my head felt like a truck has run over it and my arms - limbs felt so heavy with plasters on. My throat felt dry with thirst. I tried to open my eyes but they were swollen and it pained a lot.
I can sense someone's presence around me. "Who is it? Sam? Angy? Is that you?" I remember angy's bloodied face "Angy are u alright buddy...what happened?"
A blurred figure moved infront of my sight "Sam? Angy? Guys...stop playing around"
"Mr.Khurana.. how are you feeling now? Can you able to see? Or hear?"
I turned my head to the source of voice "yes ..yes I can but I can't see properly...where am I ? and who are you?"
"Mr.Khurana, I am neurosurgeon Dr. Sidhhart Mallik and you are at City hospital. Can you tell me what the last thing you remember mr.Khurana is"
I said "please call me maan doctor"
Dr.Sid "Alright maan, do you remember your accident, it happened a week ago. You were in coma till today due to head injury and multiple fractures"
I said "I don't remember much doctor.. where are my friends sam and Angad?"
Dr.Sid "I am sorry maan, they both were died on spot.. the impact of accident is so high that we are surprised how you are still alive.. you are so lucky to be alive maan"
I felt someone slapped me across the face. I opened my mouth to scream but my voice didn't come out. My two best friends are dead now but I am still alive.. what an irony.." I felt so helpless and miserable. I felt an enormous weight of sadness. Sad for the choices I'd made and the time going by, Sad for losing sam and angad; my only two best friends. I want it bad right now, I want to drown in my sorrow but I don't want to feel the pain.. I want cocaine.
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Ignore mistakes; PRESS LIKE BUTTON & LEAVE COMMENTS
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Jhaanvi
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|| INDEX ||
Introduction
Chapter 1 - Pg 1(Above)
Chapter 3
Anupamaa
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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