If Only You Saw Me (2) - Page 85

Originally posted by: had2bu

🤗

Stopped at a critical time again...

white shirt blue jeans...

pink top..

haiyee both looking adorable

inko nahi toh mujhe kuch kuch ho raha hai

Inko chhod ke baaqi sab ko kuch kuch hota hai!😆

Entry of Ayush into their circle

Not entirely comfortable with that is Maan babu

Abhi uski baat khatam nahi hui aur diversion aa gaya..

He doesn't like interruptions, you see.😉

Loved the scenes on the lawn

sharing the joke SMS

her laughing with him

takes me back to that moment in life😳

the first smile and the first laugh as if your breath will stop...😳

haiyeee, super sweet Mari...

glad it was only the two of them there

Ooh, did the chapter refresh old memories?😃
I would've have kicked any third person myself if there was one in this scene!😆

Anaya has made a place in his Mom's life...

Sahi ja rahi ho Anaya

Too bad Maan ne diversion bana ke rakha hai...😆

Tch, tch! Poor Anaya! Chance lagne se pehle hi gaya!😆

Love the mother son discussions with each other

Everything in the heart and mind comes out at the end of the day to the person you are close to

As if you have been at war with the world and you come home, shed the weapons and feel that I am finally human again...

Very correctly said! There's always at least one person who lets us put our guards down and be carefree of whatever we say or do in front of them.😊

There is so much sweetness in this Maan

love for his brother and mother

trying not to make even Ayush feel bad even though he wants him to dafa ho jao..

stepping away from his Mom so Anaya can have her time with her...

trying to win Geet at the sametime make sure she is not uncomfortable...

Muaah, banda bada cute hai...

I wish aise bande sach mein exist karte!

Geet is still in development as far as I feel about her character

Like her quietness and her way of not overstepping in their circle...

Next time Geet pe zyaada likhna

aaj toh Maan cha gaya...

You've got this right. Geet is still in development stage.
To be honest, mujhe Maan ke POV se likhna aasan lagta hai just because Geet is still a little complicated for me.😆

Your story takes me away to the days where life is at a slow heartbeat

time ticking by ever so slowly

letting people get a chance too align their heartbeats

Loved it Mari...

Thanks for letting me be 1st

🤗

Bhooton ki number 1 fan...

Well... I'm glad ke you think this way about the story. Because I seriously feel ke I'm writing very childish!😆
See? There's always a way. Subah you were going katti on me because you thought you couldn't be first lekin raasta nikal gaya na?😃

Bhooton ki fan ki fan!🤗

Originally posted by: TheBrat

You know I would stop calling this a story now, because this looks more like someone's life and as if we all are chanced on someone's journal. Many a time we expect cliches and stereotype the stories and the reactions of leads and this story is just like a breath of fresh air amongst all the madness around us.

Perhaps it feels like a journal because I write it in first tense? But this isn't real. Mostly a figment of my imagination. And as for cliches, I think only a few basic storyline exist in this world. The way a writer presents the story is what makes it feel different.😊

The simple touch of hands, feeling uncomfortable and pulling it away, catching the ladder while other getting on it were just an examples how natural and un-stereotypical you made this story.

Don't the real pleasures of life lie in simple things? A simple appreciative word in a job well done, a simple loving smile or hug from someone you want...😳

This guy makes me smile at him, and he is someone I actually find cute. Trust me I generally don't like guys who are calm and sensitive since I find those characteristics quite girly

Really? You find them girly? I think a guy should have a combination of toughness and softness, that's what makes him loveable.😃

However I have to admit this man is an exception. His sulking, his understanding, his wishing quietly of wanting to know more, his slight fear that they might fall back into those known strangers category after sharing a sweet bond for a week, everything dished out so perfectly that I could also feel my heart beat anxiously wondering if that special friend Geet mentions is Ayush, but of course, there's another rational part of my brain screams to me that the special friend is someone else…someone who's a mother figure 😆

Hmm... Granted the guy is cute but I think Ayush is no less. Plus, Geet's side of story is still in the dark. Dekhte hain who's the special friend.😆

Oh yeah I do think Maan's mother mentioning the talkative girl wasn't just a random scene rather it holds some importance, and something which would be of our liking.

You're so sure about it being of your liking. Kahin sapna toot na jaaye!😆

The simple act of holding on the upper arm, and the slight color on her cheeks makes me pray feverishly that what I am expecting indeed is true and she's not unaffected by him. And the last scene only makes my heart go dhak dhak dhak dhak…

I didn't mention it but I thought everybody would guess that she's embarrassed of stumbling!😆
Kidding! Geet ki side of the story is yet to come into my mind so let's see which prayer of yours is accepted and which isn't.😉

Thanks for being here Shika!🤗

Originally posted by: Susegad

AHHH!! I typed the whole thing in the comment box, hit backspace by mistake andit disappeared.😡
So doing the whole exercise again.

That's happened with me more than twice. Once while I was commenting on your story and once while I was replying to a long comment. Had no option but to do it all over again.

I am like totally like in awe likde of like this like amazing like story.

And I like read this like twice like to get what like you like mean!😆

All those likes are like to show you how much I really really like this story.😆

Really really happy to know this!🤗

First of all, when I saw the length of the update, I squealed like a pig and then did a wiggle and a jiggle zhinga lala dance.From this moment on, you can't, just can't go back to writing smaller updates. Aisa karna is to do 'touheen' of the book of rules of fan fiction.😈

I actually type the chapters in notes of my iPod which doesn't let me know the word or the page count so I never know how long one chapter can become. I can't promise chapters of this length every time but yes, I'll always include everything I plan to, in a specific chapter.😊

I love how to Maan, his mom and Anaya are,'Girls', and then there is Geet. Just her name has thousands of butterflies clamoring in his tummy and thoughts of her surround him all the time.😳

That one person always stands out from the masses, doesn't he?😳

Did I tell you, how much I adore Maan and his mom's relationship, well let me say it again.

Reminds me how I used come back from school and college and follow my mom all around the house sharing my day's events with her. And that smart lady used to hand me things to do as I was chattering away nine to a dozen, and I would be helping her out without even realizing it.By the time I'd realize and start complaining she'd say that was the tax I had to pay for her patience in listening to my chabad chabad.

Now your Mom is a smart woman! 😆

For a moment I was perturbed when Maan's mon was favoring Anaya, but I loooved the new angle you brought in with the twist you gave to the, 'Geet's special friend' mystery. That was totally unexpectedly awesome, especially a Geet who is so comfortable with his mom, that she literally turns into a chatterbox(and I hope it is Geet) 😉

My lips are sealed about his mother's and Geet's respective friends.😃

There is a quote that I think explains the gist of your story.

Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a miracle.

I actually love this quote and have it saved with me.😊

An ordianry setting and an ordianry couple, are experiencing this miracle and reading about them is what is making this story so very extraordinary. The awareness between them, from the light brushing of the hands to the time spent together going to different locations, sharing lunch and shared laughter over shared jokes(I especially loved that one, Simple things that I can easily relate to is weaving the magic for me.😳

Simple things are the most effective in weaving magic and making life beautiful! 😳

Who needs enemies ehwn you have friends like Ayush. Bechara Maan. I am totally loving Ayush, and am hoping Ayush's behaviour will spur him into action.😆

Let's keep our fingers crossed that the guy gets some guts after seeing his friend flirting with the girl like this! 😉

I am in love with this stalker gentleman who worries about falling back into the old habit of 'two classmates who never talk to each other', and blurts out the first excuse that comes to his mind. He is just too adorable in his awkwardness.😳

I wonder why you're calling him a stalker. He hasn't been one. Yet. 😆

Then there was the catch and the fall scene with Geet blushing. I want to know desperately what is going through her mind. Maybe next time we get to see her side of the fairytale hmm?😉

Is it a fairy tale from the girl's view, too? 😃

And then their eyes met...and then...Mayyo put an full stop and then... I went Ahh!!no, no, no not yet. Pleeeaase!!

It was a long chapter as it is, wasn't it? But I just had to stop there anyway. 😆

Every update is like inhaling in a gulp fo fresh air. It leaves me pretty pleased with the world in general. It satisfies me and yet leaves me craving for more.

Your craving is making me start writing the next chapter right away. 😊

Waitng eagerly for my next fix.

Love you sweetie, you're the best.❤️

Love you too Apa! You're the bestest! 🤗

Originally posted by: Koolsmile

Soch rhi hun Res kr dun, phr socha nhi karun, phr dubara se socha agar Res kr dungi to comment jaldi de paungi 😆 Hope is baar res kr k jaldi edit kr dun, warna Avi phr se ghussa karegi mujhpe Mayyam to sweetheart hai, Wo to kuch kahegi nhi comment karun na karun lekin Avi xurur daante, aur shayad Aashu bhi 😆