Jokes - Page 102

Ha ha ha good one caryn..... 😆 😆

🤣 🤣 Caryn, ur jokes are so funnyyyy. Oh, the third testimony, i've gone through that before 😳 Same incident when i went to mall with my dad to get a gift for my mom 😳 I was sooo ashamed and my dad was laughing and laughing ... 😆 Oh, and i liked the genie one too 🤣 🤣 🤣

A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, "You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking."

The cat said, "All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on."

God said, "Say no more." Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God made the mice the same offer that He made to the cat.

The mice said, "Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again."

God answered, "It is done." All the mice had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God asked the cat, "Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?"

The cat replied, "Oh, it is WONDERFUL. The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!"

A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The following exchange took place between the lawyer and the witness:

The lawyer: "Did you actually see the accident?"

The witness: "Yes, sir."

The lawyer: "How far away were you when the accident happened?"

The witness: "Thirty-one feet, six and one quarter inches."

The lawyer (thinking he'd trap the witness): "Well, sir, will you tell the jury how you knew it was exactly that distance?"

The witness: "Because when the accident happened I took out a tape and measured it. I knew some stupid lawyer would ask me that question"

3 friends die in a car accident and they go to an orientation in heaven.

They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning you, what would you like to hear them say about you?

The first guy says,"I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."

The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."

The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say ... Look, He's Moving!

A nice young worker from the Post Office, was sorting through her regular envelopes, when she discovered a letter addressed as follows:
GOD
c/o Heaven

Upon opening the envelope, a letter enclosed told of how a little old lady, who had never asked for anything in her life, was desperately in need of $100 and was wondering if God could send her the money.

Well the young lady was deeply touched and arranged a collection from her fellow workmates. She collected $90 and sent it off to the old lady.

A few weeks later another letter arrived addressed to God, so the young lady opened it and it read

"Dear God,
Thank you for the money, I deeply appreciate it, however I only received $90. It must have been those bas***ds at the Post Office."

Three elderly ladies were discussing the travails of getting older.

One said, "Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand in front of the refrigerator and can't remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich."

The second lady chimed in, "Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can't remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down."

" Well, I'm glad I don't have that problem; knock on wood," said the third as she rapped her knuckles on the table "... Oh, That must be the door, I'll get it!"

Simple love equations

Intelligent girl + intelligent boy=deep love
Dull girl +intelligent boy= love
Intelligent girl + Dull boy=marriage
Dull girl + dull boy=pregnancy 😉

Ahaa nallu,enna oru super research 😳.

Vani 1st 2 & last one hillarious.3rd one,i've already heard b4.