Part 2:
Roshni couldn't believe where she was standing. She had planned to come here since a long time ago but now, actually being here was truly a blessing for her.
She couldn't thank her mom enough.
A big huge smile appeared on her face and her eyes sparkled just like it would before.
Only one face was on her mind and heart. His silky, soft hair, his brown hazel eyes.
She nearly hugged herself thinking of him. It had been five years but never did her heart forget to remind her of Siddharth, her one and only.
Sweet memories came running back to her.
She thought of meeting him, how he would react, if he had changed or not. What he was doing nowadays?
She also started thinking of every possibility, what if he wasn't here? What if he had moved on, what if he had completely forgotten about her?
She let the positive thoughts flow down rather than the negative ones. She didn't want to ruin her sweet thoughts.
She was so tempted to scream, to scream that she's back, however she was aware of the people around her.
"How did you like the surprise?, DD asked her excitedly.
"The best mom, you're the best ever!!, she hugged her mom again jumping with joy.
Her mom examined her happiness, that glow on her face, that smile.. She understood Roshni's feelings a long time ago.
She felt it was her duty to fulfil her dream, as it was her who separated them in the first place.
"Chalein Roshni?, she walked out of the airport with Roshni.
They ordered a taxi and went to their old house where everything was newly furnished and the paint was wet.
They slowly walked in, as if it was their first time.
The pictures of them together, of SidNi together as kids didn't go unnoticed by her.
Roshni was delighted, "Now this is where I belong.
She looked at the pictures. Her feelings jumbled up and she felt more wild nearly, she was deeply craving for him, this feeling she didn't want it to go away at all.
It was almost as if she could feel Siddarth near her.
"BOO, A voice came behind grabbing her shoulders.
"OMG, Roshni screamed getting scared.
Siddharth laughed at her and started running around the place before Roshni could hit him.
She ran around the place, "Siddharth you're still the same, can't run as fast.
She caught him and playfully punched him on his arm.
"Owww, Siddharth pretended to cry.
"Ufff drama queen, Roshni laughed.
They hugged each other, arms on each other's back.
Suddenly there came a knock on the door.
Roshni realised she was dreaming, and that she was actually hugging one of Siddharth's pictures. She giggled at herself.
After a while, she heard a familiar voice.
"Namaste.
"Aunty!, she shouted.
It was Simran, she ran up to her and gave her the tightest hug.
She took her blessings and they asked each other how they were, etc.
She took a glance at the door for signs of anyone else, but no one else was to be seen.
Her face kind of went red and Simran noticed her frown.
"Siddharth ko dhoond ri ho?, she asked her.
"Woh...actually..yes, she did a small smile.
"Don't worry, actually there's a party tonight at his workplace so he's helping out.
"Work, hmmm, Roshni thought.
Simran sat down.
"Aunty either he's a doctor or some type of boring teacher for biology.Simran and DD laughed.
Simran told Roshni that he was a doctor.
Roshni couldn't help but let her mind wander off, of how he would look like, like a doctor.
She remembered telling him to fulfil his dream a few days before she went.
Flashback:
They were preparing for their exams the next day. It was one of the last times they would spend together.
"La la la...kyunki tum hi ho, Roshni started humming and she got louder and louder.
She loved singing when she would study.
She loved music in general.
Siddharth couldn't help but smile, "Roshni you should really become a singer you know that?
"Don't make fun of me, she lowered her eyes thinking Siddarth was joking.
"Arre I'm serious, you have an awesome voice, he reassured her.
"Thanks, she kinda blushed.
Siddharth continued gazing at her. "So my best friend also blushes huh?.
"Stop it Siddharth, she threw a pillow across the room at him.
He laughed and got back to studying.
Roshni got up from where she was sitting and walked over to him.
She sat down next to him and noticed he was studying his usual biology.
She took a long look at him, as if he was the only thing present in the room.
"Siddharth can you promise me something?, she asked politely.
"Nope, he joked.
She glared at him and he then turned his chair around facing her and said "Yeh bi puchne wali baat hain? Come on bolo.
"Promise me that one day no matter how down you feel or even tired, you'll never let go of this dream of yours.
Siddarth took her soft hands into his and looked at her directly into her eyes and replied "My best friend won't be there, so who's gonna convince me everytime I'm upset huh?.
Roshni sighed and took a deep breath. "Siddharth we've been over this a million times, I can't stay".
"And I've said a million times that I won't stop saying it.
They were lost in each other thinking of how it'd be possible to stay away from each other.
Roshni felt a little discomfort. She was so close to him, they had been closer before but at that moment, it felt different.
She felt her stomach tingling.
Siddharth looking at her didn't make it better. His eyes didn't even shift off her.
Their hands were still intertwined and he rubbed his fingers across hers.
She let go feeling nervous.
She ruffled his hair jokingly to lighten up the mood.
Siddharth knew what she was feeling but didn't say anything. He just warmly beamed at her.
Flashback over.
Roshni went up to her room and thought of how she should meet him. Should she surprise him? Should she just show up in his house or call him?
"God help mee, she shrieked.
An idea popped into her mind. "Of course, she grinned.
She thought of going to the party tonight.
"Now I just need to find the perfect outfit to wear, she exclaimed.
Meanwhile in the hospital:
Siddharth was working at his desk looking at reports, when someone came in.
It was another doctor.
"Oh hi Kashi, how are you?.
"I'm fine Sid, actually I'm here to ask you something., she was nervous.
"Go on.
"I thought maybe since everyone has a date tonight, me and you could..you know go as dates, she blurted out.
Siddarth looked at her, no reaction. He wasn't sure how to react.
He didn't want to break her heart either as she was quite a nice girl. He was very thoughtful of other people's feelings.
"Look Kashi, of course we can go as dates, but only tonight, he tried to say as nicely as possible.
"Sure, I was only asking about tonight anyway, she was clearly excited. Who wouldn't be?
She left the room.
Everytime someone would ask him out, he would hesitate. He never got the feeling that they were the right one
It was as if his heart was reserving the place for someone else.
He felt happy today, he didn't know why but there was something that seemed right that day for him.
His work was over and it was time for him to go home.
Khurana house:
He entered and noticed it was quieter than usual. He went to his sisters room.
"Kritika where's mom, he asked her who was listening to music.
"Oh moms at D..., she stopped abruptly covering her mouth.
Siddharth was bewildered.
Kritika quickly thought of something and said "Mom went shopping.
"Shopping? For what?, Siddharth knew his mom barely ever went shopping.
"Ugh how would I know Sid?, she cheeked.
"Okay then, he closed her door.
He found Kritika's behaviour a bit weird but he let it go somehow.
He realised he also had to go shopping for the party.
Shopping centre:
Roshni went shopping too as she couldn't find anything good to wear.
She was more so looking for something casual, as she knew the party wasn't really a big one.
She was looking around, going into shops that she would usually go in as a child.
She loved reviving those memories.
She continued walking around and her eyes wandered around.
Someone had entered the shopping centre.
Someone perhaps familiar.
She felt someone behind her and as she turned around, her heartbeats got faster and faster.
"OH..MY..GOD, she breathed heavily. Her eyes widened at the look of HIM. Her mouth tried to shape words but it couldn't;
There he was standing near a shop facing the clothes. She was in another shop but she could see him from the side.
She swallowed closing her eyes and opening it again only to see him again. At this point, she knew it wasn't a dream.
"Siddharth, his name escaped her mouth passionately.
She froze looking pleased. She had remembered exactly how he looked like and he had barely changed.
She desired to go and run into his arms, but she waited because surprising him and waiting more was always more fun.
"My Siddharth, she actually couldn't believe he was standing there.
She was mesmerised by him, how admirable and smart he was looking.
She could nearly feel her heart aching for him. There was an unknown tingle running through her veins as she continued to gaze lovingly at him.
Something had changed. Her feelings got deeper time by time. She was transformed. Her breaths hitched and every part of her body sparkled with pleasure just by looking at him.
She bought her outfit and got out of the shop, while Siddharth continued to look for something to wear.
Later on:
Roshni got ready wearing a yellow crop top and black jeans with her high heel boots.. Her make-up was on fleek. She was looking absolutely flawless.
"Waah, kya baat hain, today you're looking very sexy, DD winked from behind.
"Mom, she laughed.
She took a last time check in the mirror and left for the party.
Party:
Siddharth was already there looking sexy as usual. He was wearing jeans, a black vest and a greyish open shirt.
He was there with Kashi laughing and talking.
Suddenly everyone was interrupted by someone.
"Listen up everyone, I hope everyone's enjoying the party, to which everyone cheered on.
"We are sorry to say that our music is not working, so we'll be open to anyone who's willing to put their music on or even sing.", everyone booed on.
But there was someone who just arrived and heard this. She thought it was the perfect opportunity to sing to him and surprise him.
She sneakily went up to the guy and volunteered.
"Great, what's your name?.
"Roshni, Roshni Patel.
"Great to meet you Roshni, just go on the stage and I'll just announce your name in a second.
After some moments everyone saw a girl on stage, her back was turned around.
Roshni was nervous, she never sang on stage before but she thought of Siddharth's words ages ago and gained courage somehow.
"So guys we have a girl here who's willing to sing for us, the guy said.
The spotlight fell on Roshni and the music started slowly.
"Agar tum mil jao, zamana chod denge hum, her voice followed the piano keys.
Siddharth smiled at the sweet voice he was hearing.
Tere dil mein raheinge tujhko apna ghar bana lenge
Tere dil mein raheinge tujhko apna ghar bana lenge
As the music went on, Roshni slowly turned around and came off the stage and continued singing. Her eyes searched for him.
Tere khwaabon ko gehno ki tarah khud par saja lenge
Everyone was dancing with each other.
Kasam teri kasam
Kasam teri kasam
There was too many people and Siddharth was at the back unable to see who was singing.
Taqdeer ka rookh mod denge hum
Siddharth stopped paying attention after a while and Kashi asked him to dance with her to which he said yes.
Agar tum mil jao
Zamana chod denge hum
Roshni walked around and her eyes fell on THEM.
Tumhe hum apne jism-o-jaan mein kuch aise basa lenge
Tumhe hum apne jism-o-jaan mein kuch aise basa lenge
They were dancing with each other. She imagined it to be so different. That wasn't the way it was supposed to go.
She thought she would be the one that would be dancing with him and he would be smiling and even kissing her.
Teri khushboo hum apne jism ki khushboo bana lenge
Her voice kind of broke but continued. She couldn't stop now, she was singing to many people, to a real crowd.
Khuda se bhi na jo toote
Khuda se bhi na jo toote
She saw Siddharth's hands on Kashi's waist swaying her back and forth. "You're a great date you know that", Kashi said.
Woh rishta jod lenge hum
Siddharth smiled. "Thanks, Kashi"
Agar tum mil jao
Zamana chod denge hum
She thought only she had that right but now it seemed like everything had changed.
Tumhe paa kar zamane bhar se rishta tod denge hum
A huge part of her just fell apart. Her teeth clenched and she wanted to go over and break them apart.
Agar tum mil jao
Zamana chod denge hum
She smirked "I was wrong, I was stupid", she thought to herself.
Agar tum mil jao
Zamana chod denge hum
Siddharth didn't even look up to her and Roshni took this the wrong way.
Agar tum mil jao
Zamana chod denge hum
"He has a girlfriend, wow..guess I was too late".
As soon as the song finished, she ran outside. She always tried to be strong but this time she just couldn't, she stood at the car crying.
The person who I thought would never hurt me, today has hurt me the most.
"Koi baat nahi Siddharth I'm happy for you", tears didn't stop strolling down her cheeks.
As she closed her eyes, tears continued streaming down.
She thought she was so stupid for believing in a fantasy that couldn't ever happen.
It started to rain and Roshni tried to wipe her tears. She didn't even mind the rain because all she could think about was the picture of Siddharth together with another girl.
Something in her stomach was on fire and she fumed. She wasn't even angry at him, but herself for falling in love with someone so long.
Siddharth came outside for air, when he saw a girl alone in the rain.
"Excuse me, do you want to come inside? I mean it's raining heavily".
Hearing his voice, she felt like ripping her heart apart but wiped her tears and decided to change her personality in front of him and not show that she loves him.
She slowly turned around facing him.
Siddharth stood there shocked. He just continued to stay there and suddenly smiled.
He ran up to her and hugged her, taking her into his arms lifting her and twirling her around.
It was quite cold because of the wind and being in his arms made her feel warm and secure.
He smelled her and breathed on her neck. "I missed you pagal".
His arms was around her neck and his head was digged in as close as it could be.
She didn't hug him back. She felt like it, but right at that moment she decided to not show him her true feelings.
She retreated pushing him back shocking Siddharth. What came next shocked him even more.
"Excuse me , do I know you", Roshni retorted coldly.
Siddharth laughed thinking she was joking. But then stopped seeing her pale face.
"You..you don't remember me?", He gulped.
"Eh no...you're basically just a randomer.", Those words came out to hurt him as hell.
Roshni thought it would barely make a difference to him as he belonged to someone else.
But she was wrong. His face totally changed, his eyes lowered and he couldn't take in what he just heard.
But then he smiled realising something.
"Of course, that was you singing! I should've recognised your voice".
"Yes you should've", she thought.
"Roshni.. I'm Siddharth remember? Your..best friend..", he never ever thought he would have to tell her who he is when one day they'd meet again.
With each word he'd say, he took a step closer to her causing her to back away until she hit the car.
Roshni pretended to be surprised. "Oh Siddharth it's you..hi", she said casually.
Siddharth was bewildered and shook his head in disbelief.
He didn't recognize her at all.
He felt like they were two strangers.
Roshni looked into his eyes.
"I'm sorry Siddharth I can't take this pain anymore of being friends with you, knowing that you're with someone else", she mentally apologized to him.
Siddharth looked at her and smiled. He lifted his hands to cup her face and let his fingers explore her face.
"You can't even lie properly..you forgot that I was always the only one who knew when you were lying or not remember?", He grinned. His eyes shimmering while looking at her.
"Kaise guzrein yeh din pucho hi mat", he was getting emotional.
Roshni somehow controlled herself. "Oh stop it Siddharth, we're grown up now so stop with the crap, that was all in childhood", she pretended to look at her watch.
"Oh god, I've to be home, see you", she said and walked right off.
Siddharth held her hand tightly as she tried to walk off. And Roshni's back was facing him.
"So you're telling me, that our friendship is over huh?", He clenched his fist.
"Our friendship was over years ago Siddharth", she made him leave her hand and went.
Siddharth was confused. He hoped this was all a nightmare.
Roshni looked back at him and her tears started again. "If only you were patient enough to wait for me like I did for you Siddharth"
Siddharth was now concerned. A part of him thought Roshni completely changed but another part of him kept on screaming out that Roshni is lying.
She'd never manage to lie to him before but this time, it was different. She said it in such a trustful way that Siddharth couldn't help but nearly believing what she said.
The girl who he had been waiting for just broke his heart by saying the worst words.
They both didn't know that, both their hearts was only craving for each others.
He didn't stay at the party any longer. He went straight home, to his room.
Simran who was excited went to his room.
"So Siddharth, how was the party?", She asked in a joyful voice.
"Did you know that Roshni was back?", He asked in such a bad manner.
"Yes but why are you..", she was interrupted by him.
"Why didn't you tell me mom? I could've at least prepared myself to face Roshni."
"Face Roshni matlab? I thought you'd be surprised." , She was concerned looking at his condition. His clothes was wet and his face seemed worn off.
"Oh I am surprised. Very surprised actually. Roshni's changed mom. She's a complete pain", Siddharth couldn't believe he was saying these words but that was the only thing he could think of after his conversation with Roshni.
"Yeh tum kya bol ri ho Sid. Tumara dimag kharab hain kya?", Simran felt disappointed.
"Just go please".
Siddharth never spoke like that to her before.
She went and closed the door.
Siddharth got up and recalled Roshni.
"Five years only and that much change?", He said to himself.
"I used to be worried for you endlessly, wondering how you must be doing. If you're finding it difficult to adjust in a new place or not but looks like you did more than adjust. You changed your whole personality".
For the first time, after she left he felt like crying. It was a mixture of anger and regret.
Roshni's house:
Roshni entered and DD went straight to her with a towel.
"Roshni kya hua? Why do you look so upset beta?".
She broke down in front of her. DD hugged her.
"Mom, he's with someone else". She couldn't breathe. She was heartbroken.
"Why did we come here?", She continued on.
"It would've been better to continue dreaming of him than actually coming here and getting a reality check", she wished.
DD was shook looking at her. She saw her upset before but broken like this, never.
During the night:
Simran and DD were on the phone with each other telling each other everything.
"Kashi? I've never heard that name before", Simran claimed.
"It's strange here, Roshni has lost her mind thinking about it".
"Kya bataun? Here also, I've never seen Siddharth so angry and heartbroken at the same time".
"Kuch toh garbar hain", DD and Simran thought and hanged up the phone.
Simran went to Siddharth's room who was working late into the night.
"Siddharth who's Kashi?", She tried to look as if she was happy for him but she only wanted Roshni as her daughter in law.
Siddharth's head shot right up. "Aapko kaise pata..".
"Woh actually I was just on the phone with one of my friend who works at the hospital and she was telling me about you and a girl called Kashi", she stammered lying.
"Friend what friend", Siddharth knew she was lying.
"Kya farak parta hain Sid. Just answer my question".
"She was my date to the party tonight", Siddharth answered.
"Oh okay", Simran was quite upset thinking of the fact that he went out with some other girl.
The next day was a holiday for everyone. DD thought of spending it at Simran's house.
Roshni was adamant go to, but DD kept on insisting saying that maybe she and Siddharth can be friends again.
"Mom don't force me, I can't even look at him right now", only she knew what she was going through.
"Come on Roshni, don't you think you're overreacting a little bit? I mean maybe Siddharth just went out with her once na".
Roshni looked at her and replied "okay let's say it was a once off date, but he still went with her right? Which means he didn't even think of me. As his childhood friend I always had this belief that he would develop feelings for me if not then..but I guess he never did. And he probably won't", she was pessimistic, preparing herself before getting heartbroken again.
DD was no less stubborn.
"Okay not for him, but at least go for your Simran aunty? Or Kritika. You know she's very grown up now from the time you saw her".
Roshni somehow forced a smile and agreed fighting against her emotions.
Khurana house:
Roshni entered the house after a long time. Nothing had changed. The walls, the furniture nothing at all.
She greeted Simran but her eyes didn't take off Siddharth's room. So many memories resided in that room.
She wanted to see Siddharth's room to see if he was still the messy type.
Flashback:
Siddharth was sitting down bored, when he suddenly heard Roshni's voice.
"Oh thank god, she's here", saying this he got up.
"Hey Roshni", he gave her a loose hug.
"Watsup", Roshni replied.
Roshni went to his room and as she entered, she felt disgusted.
"Ewww!!! Siddharth what the hell is this?", She said looking around wanting to scream. She hated dirty things.
There were rappers on the floor, and his bed wasn't even made. His books on the shelves were organised badly and some was lying on the floor.
Siddharth came in and saw Roshni's face.
"Yeah yeah I know what you're gonna say. My rooms untidy blah blah", he mocked her.
"This is worse than untidy", she stated.
"Stop overreacting. I'll clean it later don't worry", he swore to her.
"It's fine I'll do it for you", saying this she got to organising the shelves,etc.
Siddharth smirked. He couldn't help but admire how thoughtful she was.
"I wonder if there's anyone else like you in the world", he whispered to himself.
"Kuch kaha?", Roshni asked.
Siddharth said "no nothing".
Flashback over.
She didn't hear Siddharth's voice and when she peeped in his room, she didn't see anyone.
"Maybe he's not home", she thought.
She took the chance and went in.
His room was in perfect condition.
Everything was so clean, it was unbelievable for Roshni.
His books, his clothes, his desk, his bed everything was perfectly made.
"Looks like you changed your room along with you", she thought.
She was about to leave unable to stay in the room any longer because of the memories that came back to her, but her eyes suddenly widened.
"What are you doing here!!", Siddharth screamed. He was in a bathroom towel with nothing else on.
Roshni turned around, following her instinct. "Shitt why didn't I think he was in the bathroom", she thought of how dumb she was.
"Sorry..actually I was just..".
"Just what?", Siddharth's tone went up.
"I was..", Roshni couldn't think of an excuse.
She took a deep breath and turned around running pass him.
"Ajeeb ladki hain".
Moments later:
Siddharth came out and sat down talking to DD for quite some time.
He noticed how quiet Roshni was. He remembered how Roshni used to talk a lot. How she'd go on about one topic and quickly move on to the next one without thinking.
He laughed at the thought of it. Everyone noticed this including Roshni.
"What's so funny?", DD asked.
"Oh nothing, I was just thinking of someone", saying this he glanced at Roshni who looked angry.
"Probably Kashi", she thought.
DD and Simran looked at each other and thought to leave them alone.
"Okay you two behave, we're going out for some time", Simran informed them and left.
They both felt awkward.
Siddharth turned on the TV.
He kept on changing the channel until he reached one where there was one of their favourite childhood cartoon when they were about 9.
They both laughed at the same time, then looked at each other, then lowered their eyes.
"Why are you so far away yet so close", Siddharth thought.
"Why do I feel like I just did a huge mistake", Roshni couldn't help but wander.
Siddharth decided to break the silence. "So what happened when you got there? Did you fall on your head or something", he joked but in a rude way.
Roshni gave him that glare that she'd always give and replied "It's called getting mature you dope", she defended herself.
"Mature? More like turning into a complete pain".
OUCH That hurt Roshni and she didn't have anything else to say so she just kept quiet and held her feelings in.
This has never happened before, that they'd be in the same room but no communication.
Siddharth got a call and he left to take it as it was important.
Roshni got up feeling a little suffocated. She went back to his room.
It's like something was dragging her there.
She sat on his bed, sighing. She felt mentally tired.
She felt something at the back of her leg.
When she kneeled down it was a box under the bed.
She didn't know why, but she felt like opening it and so she did.
It was a bunch of pages.
As she started reading it said "Hey Roshni, this is Siddharth. I decided to write letters to you but I guess there was no use because my mom had lost contact with your mom completely. And my mom changed her number so even if you guys tried you wouldn't get to call. Anyways I thought of how you'd always write in your diary to pour out your feelings, I thought of doing the same. Actually I got my result today and I passed!! All because of you and your continuous nagging. I'm missing you a little more than usual today. Sitting at lunch with friends is not the same. I wonder how you're doing. If I know you, you're probably sitting down right now eating some chocolate and thinking of me too.".
Roshni laughed and cried at the same time.
"Roshni..", Siddharth said from behind.
"Siddharth what is..", she started.
Siddharth came and snatched the pages from her hand. "None of your business".
Roshni realised what just happened.
Siddharth touched the tear on her face. "Where's my Roshni gone? What did you do to my clumsy Roshni?", He demanded while holding her tear.
More tears came down her face.
"People change Siddharth, sometimes because of pain, and sometimes because of love", she couldn't hold back her tears.
But she knew she couldn't continue crying in front of him, so she went away.
Siddharth stared down at the pages and held it closely to him.
Anupamaa
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