Chandan ka palna - Page 105

Poor Teeku! She is definitely not II 😊. Her texts would have matched Harit's. Teeku is totally clueless. But I like her.

Her insides curled and knotted up just like the dried ripe mangoes. Connected the title superbly Nisha! 👏

Originally posted by: Nisha0604

No Ashu I disagree unfortunately, not every piece of advise is wasteful. Making yourself look attractive to the most important person in your life is not a waste of time

Your in laws want you to have a healthy relationship I bet

If they wanted you to divorce and walk away from it all they would treat you completely differently, trust me...

What you see as selfishness toward their son is actually their attempt to see their son HAPPY.

Just my opinion...

Interesting response there Nisha!!
I so totally get it. Mom's wanting their sons to be happy.. even when they are at logger heads with you I learnt that the ultimate expectation for the sons to stay thethered to the woman they commit to more often than not comes from the Mother in law. Mine never sees eye to eye with me but an average Indian mom almost always strives to ensure that her Son stays a decent man and sometimes that anxiety pushes them to do more than what is comfortable to our sensibilities. Modern marriage is complicated. We do dress up to head to work and "deal with it when our boss stings us unfairly because we want to make it " work " don't we?? I'm convinced keeping your disagreements appropriately expressed doesn't make you weak. Makes you change yes!! But the less open minded we are the more comfortable we are growing up aren't we?

Swan

I think in arranged marriages in laws on both sides can/will have expectations and expect for them to be fulfilled. In love marriages its a whole different story

I did Nisha .. thanks !!
I did mean MORE open minded we are 👍🏼

Hi nisha can we get one more update pls

Also I personally believe 99% of in laws out there are GOOD people. They see, observe, notice and care about everything the DIL does. If they see the girl having a good time and making an effort, they will become the DIL's greatest champion

Originally posted by: Nisha0604

I think in arranged marriages in laws on both sides can/will have expectations and expect for them to be fulfilled. In love marriages its a whole different story

As a parent I admit I am supremely selfish. I cannot think beyond my kids' happiness and will sell my kidney, liver and heart for it😆

At the same time I know I will warm up to the person if I see my kids being happy.

Sweet..
I'm not a mom yet so don't know if I'm going to be a decent one. But yes I do believe in every relationship empathy and being unselfish is crucial!
I have also learnt the hard way that even if you do your bit relationships don't always reward you!! So it's important to be kind to the ones that love you back with out judging.

Swan

Originally posted by: Nisha0604

Also I personally believe 99% of in laws out there are GOOD people. They see, observe, notice and care about everything the DIL does. If they see the girl having a good time and making an effort, they will become the DIL's greatest champion

they will make sure the DIL gets to eat her fave street food, go out to shop at her fave stores and will make her fave food at home.

Its like a job. You give your 100% you will be rewarded

You go in with cynicism anger and arrogance and a know-it-all attitude then it becomes a struggle

Agree with you ! 99% people are good not evil. But sometimes in Arranged marriages, some of the issues come with baggage of egoistic parents, in laws wanting to please distant relative sometime fail to see the end goal of marriage - a happy couple.

One thing I am not convinced is, after 9 hours of work, dealing with kids, HW, pickup/drop offs, dinner - where do u have the time/energy to pretty up ? I believe a pleasant welcoming smile is more than enough ! When you have lesser commitments and more household help, that is possible.