Chapter 8 - I WANT TO BE...HER 'MONSTER'
"9mm." I asked.
"What for?"
"My reasons, are best kept with me"
After grabbing my gun from that bas***d, I stalked my way out of the garage. f**ked up jackass. Grabbing my keys, I unlocked my car.
"trynna run away?" I heard someone.
"What the hell do you want now Jock?" I admit. I was pissed. And if this guy's gonna piss me more, he's gonna be ending up in the body bag sooner or later.
"gimme my money, and I'll let go." he said.
"Forget it. that wasnt a street race. It was a clear deal, and we both know who won it." he's starting to piss me.
He stepped closer, Like as if he could do anything to me, sure, I was taller than him. I've gotten into probably a million fights than this guy. And I could literally beat the shit out of him. And I was tempted
to beat someone now. He's going to be my first victim.
"I'll get you next time!" he exclaimed.
"Come whenever. you know what's my answer. Dont waste my time." I Got back in my car.
Bloody bas***ds to deal with, these days. Damn! Couldnt they just get a life? was that so hard? I pumped up the volume, the excitement shot out through my veins. I drove faster. picking
up my pace. 60 miles per hour..80... Damn... it felt so good. I didnt care whether I'd meet an accident tonight. I didnt care whether I'd get pulled over. I didnt plan on going home early tonight.
I was just pissed with a lot of people trying to deal with shit in my life. I Planned to crash down at some party tonight. but with my phone buzzing out texts from my mom about where I was, yea right, look who's the parent here. with my mom in the club like its her house. I just switched off my phone.
Party. Girls. Drinks. Distractions. Music. Driving.
I need them.
I reached somewhere, probably where college students party. girls in here looked older than me. maybe on their 20's. but heck. I am just 17.
f**k it.
I need distractions. I checked the time, the night was still young. time to get heated up. it was just 9.30.
As soon as I entered the place, it reeked of Pot in here, god. I might have drank. but I've never smoked. and Nobody. literally Nobody can force me to smoke. I just feel like it will control me.
So,I avoid it at my fullest. I saw some hot girls peering at me. I wanted to hit on all of them. but... nothing brought me to life, the way she did.
God. shaking her out of my head. I went to the drinks section. Definitely this is a guy's house. the drink is mixed with something else. I saw 3 girls checking me out. A blonde was staring and
eye-wanting me. maybe tonight's her night. You're on, babe.
thoughts of what happened two weeks ago's night came over me... out of the blue.
After that f**king accident of crashing down at HER place. Thinking it was my house. My head still didnt think straight. I was pissed off. Before going to her place, I was at the garage, fixing Madoc's
and my car, out of the blue Mac pulled over, And heck, Mac brought in 2 fat shit'so's and tried to attack me with knives as weapons, luckily I Wasn't alone. Madoc helped me. I beat Mac last time,
because of that bas***d eye-f**king the girl I loved, but now Hate the most. I want her to deal with Every possible ways of sadness, BUT only BY ME. No problem should come to her, other than Me.. I
want to be the Reason for all her tears and I feel this urge that I am King, and I win competitions whenever I see her cry or get angry. Mac and I ended up in brutal fist fight that night. that guy was 10
times worse than me for the bleeding. My blows were strong
i thought Mi'ama would be Home, but.. I forgot she parties a lot these days.
After I was suddenly without my knowing cleaned up in Her place. When I saw her worried, I felt like as if I was weak. as if I was tumbling! and every joint in me was breaking.
I was angrier and the images in front of me that night was a damn Blur. Nothing was straight in my head. I was drunk as Shit and I was still in the mood to beat someone. And I've never in my life
hit a girl. Not even with Her Especially not Her.
I was searching, searching for Her. I couldnt see her properly. she was wiping me, the blood in my abdomen, flowed with layers and layers of blood. f**k, I've dealt with this shit alotta times.
And if this is the first time this Chica has seen me bleeding. Then I'd bloody hell show her the blood pouring out in me, whenever I see her. she was scared. I sensed that. And that's what I didnt
want. I didnt want her to be scared of me. I wanted her to be Angry...Angry..and Angrier with me. Like No limits to being Angry with me. I want her to Hate me. Hate me like she wants me desperately
Dead.
I tried stabilizing myself in front of her, but damn. I had alot of drinks these days. Especially after her Arrival at the games night. She pushed me. She pushed me slightly, but my body at the time
couldnt stay in one piece. I just fell back, I grabbed her. Na-a. I aint gon' fall alone. Your coming down with me I thought I'd hit the floor. Probably I was ready for the hit on my head, with this
Chica on my body. on top of me. But heck! I fell into a tub with her. Fuuuck! this is so not real. I want HER To be PEGGED by me. Not me to be pegged by her! I want her to hate me.
But fall. Fall like anything! but I was Too high. Too drunk. Too Dumb enough to come to her. Too weak in my body. Too Low. I couldnt recognize how low I've been. but she brought me to life...
The second I saw her eyes, something breathed deep inside of me. I felt alive. I felt Calm. Nothing...but alive. she was inches away from me. Damn! damn! damn! how come she has this effect on
me? She'd never feel this way for me! I thought I was missing my only chances. But...She pulled off. And I didnt want to force anything. I knew Nothing was going to happen between us. but...
She has me like a Ken doll. I used to Love This girl like anything. i'd basically KILL a guy, if he wants her. but now, f**k it! i've got a lotta shit to deal with these days.
I dont know, why I told her to not get nervous. But bloody hell I want her to damn Hate me!! Not get scared of me! I had no idea what was going on. But I felt alot alive than usual. I didnt
know whether I laid my hands on her. I didnt know what I asked her. but i was certain to make it sound hurting. So I could get her Angry! I wanted her Angry !! I want her to be angry with me!!
but I remember the one line she used... she damn well Hurt me like a prick! it was a smack blow. I mean...it felt like as if she meant it.
"because I'm not you... I dont care about one person one year, and forget them the next."
Not care about her? What the f**k did she mean by that? not care about her?
Yea! right.. and I was a little baby here in San Diego. to start a damn bloody new life! without her. crying! Yeap! She is f**king right !! I dont care about her
She hurt me that night. It pricked me hard. it had me thinking about it over and over. I didnt know why a stupid nosy bitch's words would hurt me! why HER!
I did a Smart move that time, she was curious to know something, but I Suddenly felt Dead & angry. And a lot..lot..lot Pissed. I wanted to bang somewhere. I wanted to crash the world. hit on something
so strong. And bleed. I wanted to be...the monster.
I remember stepping closer... that's when I lost full control in me. I lost every nerve I had. But hell. I had to do it.
I...I dont know what happened. But she again pissed me. but this time Anger was evident on her face. She was ready to Push me. And I Liked that Fire! I liked every way of her getting angry..
Yes ! I want that, girl. bring it.
She turned me on by her anger, she made me mad. she made me angrier than usual and we both had to take on this... She pushed me. She is driving me crazy, wow! I felt this urge to do something
with her, Now. in MY bed. I Want Her.
Period.--End.Of.Discussion.
and then she dropped another scar.
"You mean Nothing to me! Nothing.." I know she didnt mean it. She didnt mean it. did she mean it? No! she shouldnt have. cause I've played a major role in her life, I cant just be erased in a day.
Before she continued any further and get me more mad than I already was on that night. I wanted to do something to Chill me. God! I've never felt so angry before in my life, ever since I saw her.
I cant live a second without trying to find strategies to ruin her life. Make it MORE miserable. I've become angrier. I wanted to bang the faucet tub. But instead I crashed on her lips...
...my heartbeat stopped, the world spinned like a top, I was there and so was she. she held my hair, brought me closer, and I kissed her like I never kissed a girl in my life.
I know im the player, the bad guy in school and all. but... she made me feel i cured all my cuts, she made me feel like... as if she erased every girl I slept with or Kissed. She erased all the sadness
in my life, and brought complete Happiness. She tasted like candy. I couldn't help but laugh at the thought that I had ruined her little cute party she wanted to have in her own house. all by herself
well... A party doesnt get started. without me
She made feel... Like I never kissed a girl in my life and this was the first time.
Bloodddy helll!! Why now Mamacita?!?! what the f**k stopped her.?!? We were kissing like each of us needed each other. why did she stop me? why did she push me?
i should get outta here, i think im losing it.
After ALLL That happened. The bitch locked me up in her House! with her inside the room. ^__- what the f**k does she think of herself? God! she threw my damn one last bottle. I was ready to
Lose on her again, I didnt want to do anything to her, I just wanted to kiss her... alot. Non stop. just her and me.
I wanted way Out! I didnt want to stay here and wait for her! I'd probably be afraid of myself too. I.SO.MADLY.WANNA.KISS.HER.AGAIN. !
if I get her...I'm never leaving this mamacita outta me. but I laughed at the way she tried to comfort herself, by snacks and candies... wow, a movie too. Will smith. Bingo! guess who's gona watch it
now. Sorry sharon. I dont have manners. I sunk in the couch, stretched my legs, and ate the candies. I wonder what she'd be doing in the room. but I just watched the movie. And halfway through
Passed out.
In the morning, I found myself asleep in my own bed, I was worried whether it was all a dream, because *Literally* felt that kiss. and I'm still wanting it. Mi'ama finally told me that she picked me up
from sharon's house, and haha.. god! I was heavy for them to handle me.
Not my fault, i want chicks to be impressed of my bod.
After two weeks from that incident. I havent seen, heard, mention or want to know about her whereabouts.
----
"Meet me at the top room, Need some massage boy." the blonde girl winked at me.
~Time to attack~
Snapping my eyes back to the blonde with a hot bod. I blocked the past from entering further, or else.. by now I'd probably shove up the glass on the girl and drive to sharon's house and KISS her
like it's still her First and last Kisser kissing her.
laying my drink down, and heading to follow her.. we climb up the stairs, and reach the closest free room.
She twirled around after I closed the door, and grabbed the chunk at the back of my neck and brought me down to kiss her... she undressed me as I undressed her.
Heck. Im making out with a girl, whomI have no idea of even what's her name.
and that was the last thought of the night. after that... I lost control. as we crashed on to the bed.
I Kissed her slowly, then quickened the whole process...
"Kiss me swayammm...i've wanted you for so long, Didnt you want me?" Huh? What? the f**k? did i just hear sharon say something? I snapped my head out.. and got out of the bed. I saw the same blonde, and no sign of sharon..
For a second. I felt like as if I was kissing sharon... again. I Really want to. and the more im here... the more I want to sneak into sharon's house one day..
She pulled me back in, I was drunk enough to know what happened next.. Now, I wasnt on control. The girl was.
When i was 10.
my name is swayam.
my name is swayam.
my name is swayam.
I kept repeating it over and over again, trying to get my heart to stop beating so fast. I wanted to go and meet our new neighbors, but I was nervous. There was a kid living next door now
-Probably ten years old like me- and I'd smiled when I saw that she wore baseballs caps and chucks. Other girls in my neighborhood didnt dress like that, and she was pretty, too.
I leaned on my windowsill, checking out the house next door, alive with music and light. No one has lived there for a long time, and even before then it was just the old people
A big tree stood between our houses, but I could still see through the green leaves.
"Hey sweetie."
I turned my head to see my mom leaning on my bedroom door frame. She was smiling, but her eyes were teary, and her clothes were wrinkly. She was sick again. She got sick whenever she drank
the bottle drinks.
" I Saw that we have new neighbors." She continued. "Did you meet them?"
"No" I shook my head, looking back out the window, wishing she'd go away. "They have a girl. No boys."
"And you cant be friends with a girl?" Her voice cracked, and I heard her swallow. I knew what was coming, and my stomach tightened.
"No. I Cant"
I didnt like to talk to my mom. Actually, I didnt know how to talk to her. I was alone a lot, and she pissed me off.
"Swayam--" she started but didnt continue. After a moment, I heard her walk away and slam a door down the hall. She probably went to the bathroom to puke.
My mom drinks alcohol alot, especially on the weekends, and all of a sudden I didnt want to meet the brown-black haired girl next door.
So what if she seemed cool and liked to ride bikes? Or that I could hear Alice in Chains coming from her bedroom? At least I think it was her bedroom. The curtains were closed.
I Stood up straight, ready to just forget about it and go make myself something to eat. My mom wasnt probably cooking tonight.
But then I saw the Girl's curtains open, and I Stopped.
She was there. That was her room! And for some reason, I smiled. I liked that our rooms faced each other.
I Narrowed my eyes to see her better as she opened the double doors but then widened them when I saw what she was doing.
What? was she crazy?
I yanked up my window and peered out into the night air. "Hey!" I Shouted at her. "What are you doing?"
She jerked her head up, and my breath caught when I saw her wobble on the branch she was trying to balance on. Her arms flailed from side to side, And I was immediately out of my window and
climbing into the tree after her.
"Be careful!" I yelled as she bent down and grabbed hold of the thick branch with her hands.
I crept into the tree while holding onto a branch at the side of my head for support.
Stupid girl. What was she doing?
Her blue eyes were big as she stayed on all fours, holding onto the tree as it shook beneathe her.
"You cant just climb into trees by yourself." I snipped out. "you almost fell. Come here." I leaned down to grab her hand.
My fingers instantly tingled, like when a part of your body falls asleep.
She stood up, her legs shaking, and I held onto a branch above my head as i walked both of us toward the trunk.
"Why did you do that?" she complained behind me. "I Know how to climb trees. You scared me, and that's why I almost fell."
I Looked over at her as I plopped down on the thick, inner part of the tree "Sure it was" and I dusted my hands off on my long, khaki cargo shorts.
I Stared out at our street, but I couldnt shake the feel of her off my hand. The humming spread up my arm and over my whole body. It was like all of my hairs were standing up, and I kinda wanted
to laugh, because it tickled.
She just kept standing there, probably pouting, but after a few seconds she took the seat next to me. Our legs dangled together off the branch.
"So," She spoke up, pointing to my house. "You live over there?"
"Yeah. With my mom," I Said, and I looked down at her just in time to see her eyes drop, and she started to play with her fingers. She looked sad for a few seconds, but then her eyebrows came
together, and she looked like she was trying not to cry.
What did i say?
She was still dressed in the same overalls I'd seen her in earlier today. her hair hung loose and other than some dirt on her pants, she looked clean.
We sat there for a minute, staring out at the street, listening to the wind rustle the leaves around us.
"I Saw your dad." I started. "where's your mom?"
Her bottom lip shook and she looked at me. "My mom's in.. But my parents are not going to be together anymore."
What? It was odd of her to trust me completely, and tell me all this, but still... despite that she said it to me, I think it's personal, but I'll only hear if she wants to tell me.
"My dad left me when I was two." I told her, trying to make her sound better.
I knew I sounded stupid. I Didnt want to make it seem like she had it better than me. I just felt like I Should tell her anything to make her feel good. Even hug her, which is what I really wanted to do
right now. But I didnt, I changed the subject.
"I saw that your dad has an old car." She didnt look at me, But she rolled her eyes
"Its chevy nova. Not just an old car."
I Knew what it was, I wanted to see if she did.
"I Like cars." I kicked off my DC shoes, letting them fall to the ground, and she did the same with her red chucks. Our bare feet swung back and forth in the air, "Im going to race at the Loop someday"
I told her.
Her eyes perked up, and she turned to me. "The loop? What's that?"
"Its a race track, where big Kids go. We can go there when we're in high school, but we have to have a car. You can come and cheer for me."
"Why cant I race?" She looked mad.
Was she serious?
"I dont think They'll let girls race," I said, trying not to laugh in her face. She narrowed her eyes and looked back to the street,
"You'll make them let me."
The corners of my mouth turned up, but I held back my laugh. "Maybe"
Totally.
She held out her hand for me to shake. "Im sharon, But everyone calls me Ace. cause' I rule in the Ace-Chase game. I dont like sharon. got it?"
.
I nodded, taking her hand in mine, and feeling a rush of heat spread up my arm again. "Im swayam."
---
God! this dream wont stop haunting me... Forget Dream! a Damn Nightmare.. Ever since I Met this girl... every time I sleep...
Everything's so blurry...What happened? God... my head aches. I Tried moving to the other side. but got blocked by someone. Who the? Oh damn... Not another blonde. God. I've seriously,
gotta stop getting pissed. My fingers ran a hand over my hair... Pure habit. I checked the time, 2.30. Great! Just Great. Mi'ama would be waiting for me, and I didnt know who,what..How or which
Deal I made with this girl beside me, all I know was that I was shit drunk and I really need to stop Everything, besides...Now that She's back, I can chill myself in ways of getting her into alotta troubles.
Ha. The Lice trick, actually made her Lose alotta friends, If she had any the games night. I was actually disappointed, I wanted to really, really, really.. Hurt her, and it didnt nail any of my expectations.
Ever since that kiss... God. there has been No girl that I've pictured other than her... Even now. god, if I was Her I'd run far away as possible. but i want to be... HER
MONSTER.
;)
I grabbed on my t-shirt, and wore my Nike black hoodie back on, I stalked out of the room, and found alotta people on the passage hallway drunk & laid over, sleeping... I knew these kinda
people, they'd never Wanna go back home due to handling loads of shits from their parents, and end up being an outlaw. Wow. Good career. I juggle between people and make my way to the
front door. I regret I came here.
So much for being a player. Regretting now?
I unlocked my car, and hopped in... it still reeked of pot in that guy's house. I knew I had parties, but damn bloody hell.. Literally there is a SMOKE-BAN policy inside my house. I'd practically
Kill anybody.. especially if they bring it inside my room.
My mind calmed after I started the car, at first... I drove at a medium and at an acceptable rate of speed. I just wanted to get back to life. I Turned up the music On my Iphone. that's it... Eminem's songs
were blasting, my speed rate slowly increased...70...80... God! this is LIFE. this is how I survive. I Dont need a damn girl in my life, who f**ks with my brain every now and then..
30 missed calls from my mom.. did I look like I cared? yea.. when I Dropped millions of missed calls for her last Friday, she responded saying... "Chill.. it was just a late night party."
Just a late night party? What the f**k does she mean? Just.A.late.Night.Party. She could be raped by a croud by now! yea... a damn late night party.
I'm back. I was angry, and I drove faster.. I turned wild, I didnt know
Where the f**k was I going, but I just wanted to f**king drive the f**k out of my mind.
I pushed it further... 2.45 on the time.. Yea... like I cared again.
I slowed my car down..30..20...then a halt. I parked my car, besides Jared's car. Jared's in the Blood and that's how I know him. we both are the worst Guys anyone would want to meet.
As I walked back to my home, Slowly
I heard small giggles... Who would be laughing at this hour? suspicion tickled me. I walked a bit faster towards the giggle. The giggle sounded like a small girl, a very small girl.. and what is a small girl doing outside right now? Has she lost her way? I ran towards the voice.
God the voice seemed to be coming from behind her lawn. Not on her backyard! Dont tell me.. I ran towards the back, and I spotted that little...cute..fragile..little girl. She wasnt laughing...
She was crying... What made her cry, I didnt know. who made her cry? If I'd Known I'd break their balls. She was a perfect resemblance of the younger version of the girl in my dreams, and my nightmare.
. Was she her younger sister?
great. I'm so UNupdated of her life.. I didnt have a candy in my hand, at the time. But I could take her for a spin and get the girl some chocolates if she'd come.
I walked closer, and slowly towards her, she snapped her head towards my direction and stopped crying. She was Afraid as she noted my presence. The first impression of every girl in my life toward
me
"Dont worry, It's okay...Im a friend." I tried talking, this f**ked up talk-thing never worked with me.
"Wh-...Who...Who are yoouu???" her voice cracked. God. I've never been a pro in the sensitive games. I hope I get through this.
"Im a friend..." I repeated, widening my smile.
"What are you doing here..?" She asked, Honestly...even I'd ask myself the same f**king question. What the f**k was I doing here ?! Did some sorta sympathy draw me here? Seriously, I gotta leave.
Im a f**king badass. How the f**k did I start feeling sorry?
There was some hint, some innocence in her eyes, that actually drew me here, and her age might be...Just 5. She seemed broken.
"I Heard some noise..." I breathed out.
she turned back and started crying. Oh god This is gona be harder than I Thought.
"A better question would be, What are you doing here at this hour?" I Came closer and sat next to her, The grass was soft under me, and the girl was broken... and I'm ready to make her smile. :)
"My mom told me never to talk to strangers..."
I couldnt help but laugh, yeap, she is cute when she tries to be strong, but no matter how much ever you try to be strong, that hurt in you, will pull you down. I've been there.
"Really? Do i look alot more like a stranger to you" I asked in a funnier manner. then smiled.
"No..." She whispered. and then narrowed her eyes to the ground and stopped crying for sometime...
YES.
"So...What's your name.?" I had to drag the night, Great! Idiot me!!
"Im Tate..." I heard her.
"Now tell me, what's wrong? Why are you crying...? and where is your house?" I asked.
"This is my house, im just in the backyard..." a long moment of pause, and then she spoke.
"Nobody cares about me. my sisters dont like me. My elder brother bullies me. And my other elder brother would never talk to me, My parents... divorced, and my mom remarried. I Hate Him.
I Hateee himmm..." She whined, Ok! alota stuffs happened in Her life.. and wait. Does SHARON also not care about her sis.? I was tempted to ask.. but, I was on hold.
"You hate who?" I Had to ask.. the next time I meet him, he's dead.
"DEREK!"
"Who's derek?" I asked, ready to kill. Charging.
"My step-brother"
"Oh." he'll apologize sooner or later, if not. I'll make him.
"I Feel, like as if im alone...And nobody is there for me, not even mama.." she said. Wow! she is Just 5 and she has a lotta feelings, a person can have feelings when they are 15, but 5? that's only
If they are being literally pushed to a very bad extent.
"I lost my dad when I was 2. And my mom doesnt care about me, she parties all the time, I dont have true friends." I tried to make her sound better, just like... the old times.
"that must be terrifying... No mama and dada? and friends?"
I nodded.
I Really need to stop now, I think I should drop her home..
"You see, Life is a Game... Nobody knows when and where enemies will attack, Our happiness is our weapons, and our sadness is Game-over. So just keep the game going.. "
I tried to sound Encouraging, But heck, she is Just 5 years old. How the f**k will she be able to understand what im saying?
"Oh...So, how do you deal with it."
I dont really think she is 5! She is smarter, and the corners of my mouth twitched when I came to know She understood what I said.
"Simple, I dont care about anything..." I told her.
----
Sharon's-Point-Of-View.
"What the hell do you mean by she ran away derek?" I screamed. In two more seconds, I think I might Kill him, Like literally Kill him.
"Calm down sharon.. She cant go anywhere" What the hell do they mean by she cant go anywhere, Damn! She is just 8!! How could these people be calm about her? Sure.. mom and dad went
to Meet Uncle ben in Frontier town for the week, after their return. It hasnt been 3 weeks and Tate's already MISSING!?! what the Helll!?!?
"OK. You know what?" Everyone, Kate, Jared, Venice and Derek came in front of me.
"You people, pretend like Tate never existed in us.. Oh please. Come on, show her some respect as elders, God! did he do that big of a mistake, making you people be her Unfortunate elder
sibling? Where has the damn unity gone? Alright...If nobody's coming with me. I'm going out. Im going to search for her. " I scolded.
I slammed the door, as I came out of the house, Lord.. it was freezing here, I couldnt bare it anymore, My hands were buried inside of my pockets in my hoodie. I walked out.. searching for her.
"Tatummm..." No one, Nothing came in response.
"Taaate..." I screamt a bit more louder, only noticing.. I'd be a big problem in the neighborhood.
God! I started running crazily, I ran here and there, But stood on my grounds in the neighborhood. I didnt go any further, but it was Late night!! almost time for the Rapers and drug dealers to come
out, God! Where has this girl gone? My heart was on the verge to Jump out. I couldnt take the pressure any more, I think I'm running into Maximum.
A lonely, yet an unknown tear dropped down... What I would do to get my sister back! anything... God! Stupid Derek! Asshole Jared! Senseless Venice! and Idiot Kate! God!! they pushed her.. If
I'd Known any of this had happened... I would've been there for her... I... I... God. I cant take it anymore.. the tears are aching for release.. "TATEE!!! " I cant stop running until I find her.
"Hey...Look at that.. She's good for tonight!" Whats that voice? Where did I go? Lord.. Dont tell me... am I trapped? Not yet... I havent seen this side of the neighborhood. I mean... This place looks
Scary, I must have ran and ran, with thoughts drifting to only Tate.
"Yeaman.. She's Sexy, I wonder How she'd been workin' out.." I heard another voice peering out! God!! It was dark in here, and cold sweat was stripping down my forehead.
"OhOhoo... She's a bomb! i want her... im first dude..." I Heard another... ok. my breathing rate quickened. I should get back...
Before I tried to run anymore Further A gang of guys Formed a quadrilateral in front of me...
"hey come here baby.."
Oh No.I Should have brought Jared with me. what am I going to do? God... I feel tensed. I've never been so afraid in my life before... My stomach dropped, my heart is beating quicker than ever,
My legs are shaking, The cold sweat in my palms are releasing like tsunami, and I think im having the symptoms of fainting... God! I better not. it will Only be a big Benefit for Them !! Tonight I think
this is my last night of survival... What am I going to do? I think... its best if I die Right now.
My sister is missing,
My sibblings are a MESS
My parents divorced.
My ex-bestfriend hates me.
My mom remarried.
I dont have anybody to care about me in school.
I have no friends.
The guy I loved... Hates me more than ever... this... was the worst of all.
Great! Tears and tears pooled down.. What is the reason for me to survive? I dont need to be in this world anymore. A little more seconds, then my teeth began to chatter.
Im going to get raped in less than 5 mins. I Dont need to defend myself for this.. and wow! how amazing could I get, Im a virgin! so practically.. Im weak! and i have no Experience!
Im going to be ending up in a well.. Dead, raped and a Pathetic loser, That's what he wants right? me = gone! and probably this could be his big Scoop! he could spread Dirty rumors saying
that all what the media said was a lie.. and that I was desperate and a fat s**t for this.. That's what he wants!! he wants my life ruined! then go ahead!! I Dont care about my life now either..
tears pooled out... tears and tears and Loads of them...
----
Swayam's-Point-Of-View.
"Alright Geddyup! we gotta go now, its supreme late.. and your not supposed to be out here now.." I pulled her up.
"Okay...But you didnt tell me your name..." she pouted.
"Im Sw...Call me Sam." I Didnt like being called by my full name...
"Oww.. Okay! Sam.. Will you be my sweet elder brother?!" She pouted with the puppy dog face.. Is she f**king serious? how has she not tried this with her bro's ! And how the f**k
did they not fall for it.. And damn bloody hell I couldnt resist this cutie's charm.
"Promise.." I didnt know what else to say..
"C'mon now..." I grabbed her tender, fragile... Tiny little hands and walked in front of her house, and rang the doorbell. I guess their elder brother Jared would be out as he has some job
to do for the blood.
A Girl opened it, I'm guessing she goes to our school... She looked alot like my age, But f**k! She doesnt have any of the charm or resemblance as the
One girl in my dream & my nightmare..
"Oh..." I saw her jump a bit on her toes, she practically lost her breathe... as she stood there wide eyed and jaw unclosed.. Close it, sweety.. a housefly wouldnt miss this chance.
i was Actually expecting her Other sister... but.. Not right now. One way I Was glad She didnt open, or else by now.. I'd Pull her arms and kiss her and probably close Tate's eyes!
"Sa-Sa-saaamm.. what are you doing here?" Really? what kind of a f**king Question was that? my expression to her was like ---> ^___- dafuq?
"Umm... Tate was out in the backyard.." I had to mention it. Great! could I get anymore idiotic?
"What?! Sharon didnt come back?!?!" I Heard a strong, Desperate Guy's voice. Who the f**k was that?
the guy was definitely a bit shorter then me, he looks like he works out, he looks older to me too..
"Derek she didnt yet come. And tate's back" The girl beside Derek
said it lousily.
"So where is sharon then?" he asked concerned.
What the f**k! Does he mean by where is Sharon!? AT THIS f**kING HOUR?!?
my hands let go off tate's as I would've squeezed her hands, and grabbed f**king derek's collar bringing it closer to me.. he could literally see the fury in me.
I'd f**king f**k anyone whoever touches that girl !!!! Other than me..
"Where.Is.She?" My words were like thorns. He got scared... I sensed that. And I was f**king ready to punch someone RIGHT NOW!
Where the f**k did she Leave? Didnt she know its LATE?!? great she's gone blind ?!?!
How the f**k did her f**king elders leave her like that...?
If Anything Happens to her...That's it!
"She said she was going to search for tate on her own." He said quickly.
What.The.f**k?
She left in search of her sister? Why didnt I hear her? What the f**k!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????
Im Pissed. alottt Pissed. Did she Just leave like that.. and did her f**king elders NOT stop her.. or provide any assistance for her? JARED! -_- Your dead man.
"Where's Jared?" I asked. still grabbing his collar.
"Jared went to find her.." His breathing quickened.
We all know which Stage, peak or level I am now... Especially when it comes to Her.
I'm gonna f**king Kill anybody who does anything to her..
I threw Derek on the floor, and Stalked out...
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Now that was really long... Swayam's Chapter 1 Closes here...
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Jhanak
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